Female , 18-21
growing up no one ever expects they would be what they have become.
im a dork! i like dancing around like a crazy drunken ******* i like talking to strangers. and meeting random new people. i believe in pinky promises and making wishes....
Last Seen Nov 23
Member Since Mar 13, 2011
Local Time December 18th, 6:55 AM
Profile Whiteboard Recent Activity 10 Stories 76 Experiences 25 Friends 17 Confessions 12 Questions Trophies
"not Loveable, Only Fuckable" Thats what someone told me once. " you will never be loved. you arent loveable, only fuckable". i believe it more and more everyday. i hate every inch of who i am. no one will ever know it though. im … [more]
I Dont Really Know What Im Doing... i seem to have lost sight of what im doing with my life. i had it all planned out but it doesnt seem to be what i want now. i dont know what i want anymore. i need change. ive lost most things and peo… [more]
What Happened...? im trying to piece together the puzzle that is my drunken life. not entirely sure what happened last night. this cannot be good for my liver. i drunk me is not very responsible...i wonder where this b… [more]
Im Your Puppet I will never be good enough for you. Or anyone. I am just your toy. Tossed to the ground at the end of the day. You dig me up when you have nothing better to play with. But i am just dir… [more]
...there are so many things i need to confess. my mom passed away 1/27/2011. i miss her so much. things would be different if she were alive. but i lost her long before she died. she was sick my entire life. she was always in and out of the hospital. i took care of her more then she took care of me. i never would have told her this but i felt more like a mother to her then her child. i didnt have the mom i could talk to about boys or school or anything. i didnt have the mom who i could cry to. more then anything else in the world i want to have my mom alive and well. i want to have the mom who was able to get up and go shopping with me and be there when my heart was broken and be there when i… [more]
Why did i do that?I shouldn't have told you.I knew nothing good would come from it anyway.I should have just let things go as they were.Because at least i still got to see you.At least we could talk.We were friends.And you occasionally cared about me.It was enough for me.But i ruined it.I wanted more.I knew you didnt.But i took a chance anyway.And now it has ruined me.… [more]
Im sorry....Actually im not sorry. I care too much about people i probably have no business caring that much about. But sometimes you act like you feel the same.Its complicated. But we talked. And look where that got me. Hurt. Alone. Felling worthless. And you just smoked a cigarette then went to sleep. And i cried.And you just sat there.Seeming mad that i was upset.And i cut myself.Because thats the only way i know how to make this heartache go away.I do everything for you.I've always done everything for all the "yous" before you came along.And all any of you do is use me.Confuse me.Play with my emotions.But its not your fault.Im the idiot always putting myself through this.I know i will be the only on… [more]