americanoddity 18-21, F

I didn't realize it then. It wasn't till now that I realized how much I hurt some people. I feel horrible. I thought of it as playing. I'm a horrible person.… [more]

i just asked my grandma to call the psychologist. i couldn't be more scared. but i NEED help. so badly =::(… [more]

Even though i say im fine, im not. at all. Even though i say i dont care if i have a boyfrend It's the only thing i want right now in the entire world Even though you've never seen me cry You shoud see me when the dam breaks Even though everyone thinks im a rock Im as soft as play-dough Even though no one would ever guess I cut Even though I say to go away I want you to stay and talk to me Even though i can be kind of a jerk to guys It's because i used to be bullied Even though my life is good I want to die Even though im good at a lot of things I hate myself and criticize every part of my very being if you're reading this and you see yourself in it as you can see, you're … [more]

Neither of us is going to die, but my boyfriend is going off to college next year. I know it isn't the end of the world or anything. It's just, he is my first boyfriend. He may become my first love. He is so wonderful and I'm surprised he has no shame in saying that I am his girlfriend, or to be seen with me while we're holding hands or his arm is around me :) he accepts me. It is going to be hard to let him go... Thank you for listening :)… [more]