AnotherMisanthropist 22-25, F

I noticed when I was younger 10+ that I would get bouts of being sad. I was terrified of people and liked to run into the fields and simply be alone. It got worse over the years and by age 16 I was on anti depressants. I was later diagnosed with an under active thyroid. I am on medication for that now and I do see a change.Till one day when I absolutely lost it, I felt like a trapped animal and I lashed out at anything. It was a week before my menstruation so I expected something but not like this, one second I was crying my eyes out and the next I was so furious. I was so desperate that I was going to sign myself into the psych ward, I was scared. I was so scared I would lose my family or h… [more]

You would think that a mother would believe her daughter but no. I am 22, I have tinitus so bad that I cannot hear yet she does not believe me. She thinks that if I am half deaf I should be half deaf all the time. This would be correct except the fact that I can hear certain levels of sound easily where as I cannot hear when people all that well. I miss what people say and can't make sense of it. It is so frustrating when no one will believe me. She won't even believe the results from a hearing test. I was scored at -20 at most frequencies. Yet my mother still believes I am lying and that I intentionally miss hear what she says. I can't freaking hear what she said! I ask what and she gets an… [more]

I know I am not a sociopath, I am able to feel emotion. However it is a distant sense, I find I am unable to make sense of it.Maybe it is my frustration at being unable to understand emotions and social situations which lead me to be a misanthropist. I do not like humanity. I do not like anyone. I am unable to feel a connection to people and though I repeatable tried I gave up in the end. Age 20 I because a recluse. At the end of the year I will be 23. I have been alone for so long now that when I do try and interact I am unable to blend in with people. I now watch them, I read their thoughts (facebook, I am not that deluded!) and I listen to their conversations, their lives. It is as close … [more]