Arago 22-25, F

Gender identity scares me. Not that I want to change my gender or anything like that. It's just that... I'm not sure how to explain it, I guess the best way is to explain who I am.  Im a lesbian (and I hate that word), and a bit butch I suppose. Id categorise myself as a soft butch or pretty butch. I like to wear male clothing, short hair, I have a feminine face and wear makeup. Day to day I usually wear tshirts and jeans, and might class it up with a vest or a shirt. When going out I like to either wear a tshirt and black shirt open or a top and a black shirt closed. Lately though one of my friends and my mum wants me to dress differently. They haven't said it directly, but they come with s… [more]

So Im gay, lesbian, and I really do hate it. Heres the thing. I really want to be loved, to have someone. But I cant find it. And I feel more and more like Im just gonna die alone. Well not alone, cause I have friends. I have very good friends and all of that, but I dont have love. Ive never been in a proper relationship with either guy or girl. With guys it just didnt work because, well Im gay. And with girls, in all honesty, its hard to find. I think its easier with guys, all my best friends are guys. But uhm, how do I explain this. Its just that I want to be loved. Thats all it is. I want to be loved, by a girl. To be with her. To love her. And to have her feel the same about me. For her… [more]