Female , 18-21
My book Golden Tr(age)dy is now on Amazon! You can check my blog for more info xoxo

I'm completly open to anyone and everyone, so come talk to me. I'm originally from the city, but now I'm living in the suburbs and can't wait to get to San Fransico. I'm really into writing free verse poetry and playing cello/bass. I spend alot of time on here, so like I said, come talk to me.

Last Seen Nov 2, 2014
Member Since Nov 10, 2011
Favorite Quote Tired Of Living, Scared Of Dying.
  • 100% Antarctican
Vices self mutilation
Horoscope Aries
Special day 3-1
Books We all fall down, beautiful boy, liars and outliars,willow,pretty,identical,perfect,its kind of a funny story
Music indie rock, alt rock, electronica, classical, some country, blues, soul, singer/songwriter, world
Movies the grudge, edward scissorhands, the last exorcism, benny and joone, the notebook, the uninvited
Local Time April 25th, 11:39 AM

I Cut My Self

Count To 10 Shut your eyes tight, Tell yourself it's all alright. Clench your fists in till they feel as if they could burst, You remember the time you had to do this first. [more]
bigeyesseemore has shared 1 Mature Experience
  • I Cut My Wrist

    I Had A Problem Everyone says, If you cut the top of your wrist, your either scared or looking for attention, if you cut the bottom, your depressed. you have a 'problem' I would cut the top,… [more]
  • I Cut My Wrist

    A Beautiful Lie I thought i got out alive, with scars i cant forget, but now there is blood smeared across my wrists, up my arms, everywhere. it burns, i cry out in … [more]
  • I Miss You More Than You Will Ever Know

    Everyday I Miss Him More And More..hes Not Coming Back. Keven. The name i would whisper, yell, sing, and talk about for hours on end. The kid walking down my street in the pink pants. I was the one who yelled out, come over here. We… [more]
  • I Am a Child Abuse Survivor

    Stupid Stupid Stupid... Look at what we have here.. little girl.. cant even focas on me.. watch her shake, watch her cry, watch her cut how old now? 7 years of this? you could win it all. … [more]
  • Health Confessions

    I'mdestroyedscaredanxiousshaking ashamedFINEbrokendisturbedweakhopelesspowerlesssorryThis will be the last night feeling like this, I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine. These walls hold nothing but secrets,Absorbing screams and shrieks of nothing but pure terror,Scratched from desperate claws to safety,Only to be pulled further into the trap.It was all a trap, a gruesome scheme.To be ******** of everything you know, everything you have, To be split open, bleeding with flesh exposed,Only to fall down, disgusted by your own personal execution,Or is this simply rebirth?A retrace? To prove you were nothing more but a mistake?To be ******** to skin and bone,Only to be once made something be… [more]
  • Family Confessions

    Im so scared
    He'll be back, he always comes back. He is a shark, unpredictable, returning. The plates you throw, the words you scream, cutting into me further and further intill I'm bleeding out, distroyed. Its exactly what you want. I am shaking, my breaths getting faster and faster with each time I inhale. He will be back. He always come back. I feel so weak for crying, being scared. But the things he has done wont get out of my head. He slammed my head in a wall. Hes punched me, burned me, thrown things at me. He made me stay in a completly black room for two days, no food, no water. What hes done, what he might do, what he could do, its tearing me apart. Im terrified all of the time.I cant stop cryin… [more]
  • Friends Confessions

    I was amazed.
    I was truly amazed, when i posted a story,called this is my story, first of all that people read it, that they cared, and the encouragement i got. Complete strangers have given me more encouragement then people ive known for years have. Thats..simply amazing. Thank you so much.… [more]
  • Health Confessions

    Finished but Incomplete
    I can't do it anymore. Where am I going? No where. The list of things I need to get done keeps growing and I'm failing to do anything at all but sleep and cry. I'm hurting the people I care about most, and I'm destroying myself. I'm sick of acting like everything's a-okay. Reality needs to set in not just for me, but for everyone else. I hate myself. Got it? I hate myself and everything in my life. Everything's either not good enough or way too good for me. And I'm sick and tired of waiting for things that are never going to happen. Their are people with a sole purpose, and there are people like me. I just want to die. Right now. I can't do it anymore. This endless cycle just keeps repeating… [more]
  • Day 90

    Posted on: November 10th, 2012 at 5:28PM

    It doesn't feel like 90 days honestly. I mean, right now I'm just participating in being 'normal'. This took a lot of close observation of the female personality but I finally got it down to a check list of things I should do to fit in.1. Fan girl over a celebrity/ guy that will never love you back.2. Be a complete ***** to people you've never met.3. Stuff your face with food and still manage to stay skinny 4. Listen to the top 10 list and nothing else. Ever.5. Follow back only people from your school on any and all social network sites.6. Only wear approved Hollister clothing by the 'group'.7. Suck up to anyone 'above you'8. Never have an opinion, those are weird.9. When talking to a guy, m… [more]


  • Day 95

    Posted on: November 15th, 2012 at 6:42PM

    I came back and everything was destroyed..walked back from the school, I knew she wouldn't be home. The carpets have wine all over them, tables and chairs are over turned, lights broken, I'm to scared to go into my own room. She destroys me, just when I think I'm finally getting the hang of this, she shatters it. Do you know how much it hurts? When you see everyone hugging their parents, and you're alone, walking on the side of the road? Do you know that feeling? It tears you apart from the inside out. Grabs you where it knows it hurts knows me. As I walked through the house, the mirrors had different messages written on them in bright red lipstick. "I wish you were never born.""You… [more]


  • Day 22

    Posted on: January 31st, 2013 at 9:20PM

    Today was a long day honestly. But, tomorrow is Friday, so I guess that's good. I've found out that I'm running out of things to say. But I know I could talk for hours to some people, but I don't let myself talk to them. On another note, Savannah passed last night around 2 am. Well..I won't pretend I don't know exactly when. It was 2:11. Her last words were 'arent the flowers beautiful?'. Oh I cried, I mightve cried a bit too much. No one knows, I'm not talking about it. I went to the lake today, it was snowing and beautiful. I sat in silence in till my lips and hands were purple. Tonight I miss the stars. "What's so simple in the moonlight.."… [more]


  • Day 10

    Posted on: April 26th, 2013 at 3:52PM

    This has been the longest, most tiring week ever. I just want to curl up and sleep for at least three days. I got confirmed. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to be Catholic. I guess that was sort of decided for me. I mean, I like it, but at the same time I don't agree with a lot of the things that they say. And a lot of the people there kind of freak me out. And I guess I'm not exactly 'proud' when I tell people I'm Catholic. I kinda wanted to be Buddhist or something. I don't know.I mean it feels like there's so many obligations. Like, you can't even have sex when you want to. I'm pretty sure that that's my choice. And they're totally against gays and everything. And you have to have a weddin… [more]