I have decided after saying that I will many a times that I am going to make an anonymous blog. The reason being that I feel I need to express myself in a way that I can talk freely without my identity being attached to my words.
Throughout the day I think of everything, that I feel I need to record. So my posts will be inspirational at times but depressing at others, funny, happy, sad, random, silly. You name it. It will contain the ramblings of my mind.
I have chosen a name to represent me (As I had to have a name to use this)
I did not just want to make up any old name so I have become Calypso Chisisi. This name represents my anonymity.
Calypso meaning "She that conceals" and Chisisi mean "Secret".
I hope you enjoy all that I have to say and follow my blog if it is of interest to you.
I dont mind either way I am writing for me, if I can touch others in any way at the same time that is just a bonus!
- a little Guyanese
- and a little Jamaican
- and a little English
My First Kiss Went A Little Like This... Now that I think about it it was not very romantic at all. I was 13 and had liked this guy for a while. He had just asked me out but did not want anyone to know yet. So whilst playing a game he… [more]
I Am Skeptical Last night was pretty much one of those nights that I will remember for a long time. One of those nights that I still cannot believe has happened. Just as I am content not having any kind of lo… [more]
I Never Said I Would I have many friends who are saying they wish to wait. Whenever the topic came there were certain friends I wouldn't even express my opinion around so maybe they just automatically thought that … [more]
Let's Make It Mutual I just feel like I have so much love to give. It would be nice to have that reciprocated. I just want to fall in love with someone that loves me back. … [more]
Rock BottomI genuinely don't know how to make myself feel better this timeUsually I can pick myself back up. Usually I get over it by forgiving and moving forward. But I wont let myself let go and he wont let me move forward. I don't know what to do with myself at all. My chest constantly feels like its being wound so tight any second it could snap me in half. I am in a place I have never been before. Rock Bottom… [more]
Complete ConfessionsI was going down my phone clearing out old unnecessary things. In my notes I came across something called complete confessions which I wrote a about a year and a half ago about someone that was obviously very special at the time. I genuinely cringed whilst reading over it but I know that the whole thing was true at the time. So here goes. If I were to write down every true thing that i think or do concerning you. I think I would sound SO cheesy and dumb. But I cannot help it. That is why I never say it out loud. When i hear my text tone, my heart literally skips a beat, as that sound has now somehow become associated with you. And if it is not you, I have to admit I am disappointed. A lot… [more]
You will never find the answer to your problems at the end of a bottle of VodkaThe first and last time I drown my sorrows with alcohol. I was meant to be going out and I was not in the mood at all, I felt pretty **** and I also had a large feeling that someone I did not want to see would be there. So I drank like I was downing water. Not a good idea. I made it out the house, that is pretty much the last thing I remember. I woke up in bed at 6am the next morning in the night befores clothes, with a bucket and bottle of water next to me with an awful headache. My problems were pretty much still there along with a wasted ticket, an embarrassing story of all the things i did that night from my friends and a sick feeling that did leave until that evening.Never ever again!… [more]
There was a time when all of my decisions were a little too thought out more than anything else. I would over think things so much that I never took the chance with anything. I can still be this way. However now I can also talk myself into doing something pretty rash and in the moment because I feel at the time I have a surge of confidence. I have begun just saying things just to get them out, things I wouldnt even dream of before. I cannot decide if this is a bad thing or not. … [more]
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So I have been down memory lane, looking at pictures when life seemed so much simpler. I didnt seem to care about too much back then. I had friends I genuinely enjoyed being around all the time, now my relationship with those same people feels strained. Now the friends that make me feel that way when I am around them I can count on one hand. I guess thats what happens as you get older.Home life has never been amazing but it was a hell of a lot better than it is now and there is not much I can do about that except stay away enough to appreciate being there the times that I am.I had a lot I believed in and hoped for, my beliefs and hopes now are extremely different now. The person I am is comp… [more]
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I have decided after saying that I will many a times that I am going to make an anonymous blog. The reason being that I feel I need to express myself in a way that I can talk freely without my identity being attached to my words. I have found a time in my life where I am finding it very difficult to confide in those around me in fear of being judged or put down. I feel that I am losing faith and respect for a lot of people that I have previously been close to and would like to use this page sort of like a diary. Throughout the day I think of everything, that I feel I need to record. So my posts will be inspirational at times but depressing at others, funny, happy, sad, random, silly. You … [more]
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