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Female , 22-25
It's been an emotional rollercoaster, my life.

In dilemma, as always.

Last Seen Mar 31
Member Since Nov 22, 2010
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I Am a Web Designer

I Am Not A Web Designer... ...but I'm in-love with one. And he's really good at what he does.  [more]
drizzlenna has shared 2 Mature Experiences
  • I Just Want To Be With Him Forever

    Forever, Happy With Him. I was in a 7-year relationship when I met NJ. He came unexpected, said "hi" online. I didn't know we'd go really far, but eventually I fell for him. Everything was magical. Even though I wasn't free a… [more]
  • Love Confessions

    Lately...
    ... I've been thinking a lot about the new relationship that I'm in now. All I know is that I want to always have him beside me, and I don't want him going back to his place early after a whole day spent with me. I just want him... his scent and all. But that's just half of the story. The other is, I'm not sure if I'm REALLY happy. Whatever that word really means. Much lately though, I find myself wanting to send him home earlier, so I could rest on my bed, be alone and play with myself. I sometimes invite him to do it with me, but most of the time, not. One night, he was too sleepy to do it on the phone with me, my usual reaction, which is too feel bad didn't happen. And so I decided to do… [more]
  • Love Confessions

    I love you but I get tired too.
    I just want to be my old self again -- the one who doesn't know you ever exist. I just want to learn to live without you again. Whatever.… [more]
  • Love Confessions

    I'm with three different guys who I love in different degrees.
    Right now, I feel really, really cold. I'm confused about a lot of things. I know loving three guys is not morally right, but I want to believe that one day I could settle everything, and finally choose who I really want to spend my life with. The second guy, let's call him N, has been waiting for me for almost 2 years now. I know he's sacrificed a lot to be with me. I am slowly realizing that it's him I really love, but he's been slipping away. I can feel him not that in-love with me anymore, he's starting to get cold, but he won't tell me everything he's feeling so I'm kind of clueless about the truth. I know I love him and I would really want to choose him, but where should I go if he let… [more]
  • Love Confessions

    It's only been hours...
    ...but I miss you too badly, it hurts already. I hate being away from you. See you on Tuesday, my love. … [more]
  • Love Letter #2

    Posted on: May 26th, 2011 at 10:43PM

    Dear NJ, I love you. And since you have always meant the world to me, I think it's really time for me to give your world back to you. You've always taught me how to be strong and to pray when I don't know what to do. Honestly, now I don't know what to do with myself without the usual strength I got from you then. I know you want me to be carry on no matter how rough the road may be. So anyway, I prayed to God just a while ago. I  asked him to give me strength --  to finally have the courage to let go of you and accept that things aren't going back to how they used to be anymore. I prayed for you, as always, to find happiness in your life and one day, meet the one meant for you. I thanked Him… [more]

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  • Love Letter #5

    Posted on: June 9th, 2011 at 4:19AM

    Dear NJ.I know I love you.But I can't deny --  there are a lot of things about you that I don't think I can live with now. Is that because you're not in-love with me anymore? How petty.Just now, I realized how sad my situation is. I just saw how apathetic you were -- no, it's not that you didn't care. You were actually furious cause I accidentally threw at you the cockroach which unfortunately dropped at my shoulder. I swear to God I didn't mean for it to land on your thigh. I was just shocked so I automatically flipped my hand, I was facing you --  so obviously, that pest flew to you. I'm really sorry nonetheless. I just don't know why and can't believe myself that I needed to explain to yo… [more]

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  • Love Letter #6

    Posted on: June 14th, 2011 at 4:13AM

    Dear NJ,I'm confused if I still love you.Or maybe it's just my in-denial self who's talking, but whatever -- I beleve love s a wonderful feeling, and it's sweet, fun, unconditional -- almost PERFECT. So please, try not to ruin that.If it's just my in-denial self that's typing here I wish to tell you, just this once that I think I'm starting to not love you (what's the word for that?). I think feeling different will be good for me. I don't like how insensitive you are sometimes, yet still be the kindest in my eyes. And I hate how much you hurt me, yet I still see you perfectly angelic. I must be crazy. I hate this.So yea, maybe I was wrong. Maybe I still love you, but please, try not too push… [more]

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  • Love Letter #11

    Posted on: January 13th, 2014 at 12:28AM

    Dear NJ,I still love you more than anything after everything......that's why it hurts. This year's start didn't go so well for us. There are times when I still feel that it is not me that you TRULY want. Maybe I'm just overthinking or misinterpreting you... so I think maybe it is always the best time for you to speak up, to woo me again with words I've longed to hear.I somehow feel there's a big part of us that's disconnected and I'm afraid 'cause I don't want a day to come when I don't feel anything for you anymore. As you may know, I am very capable of "un-loving" a person but still staying with him/her for the sake of companionship. I don't ever want to go back there again, I don't want a… [more]

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