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Female , 18-21

Last Seen Jun 13, 2011
Member Since Jan 20, 2010
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Heritage
  • a little Native American
  • and a little Welsh
  • and a little Scottish
  • and a little German
Vices
Politics Very Liberal
Horoscope Leo
Special day 6-30
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Music
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Local Time April 16th, 4:49 PM
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I Could Watch This Movie A Million Times

Tangled! Yeah, just wanted to add that. [more]
gloomysunday has shared 10 Mature Experiences
  • I Am Against the Death Penalty

    May I Present A Counter-argument? I do not post here to troll, but rather present an argument from the opposing side. Most of the posts I've read here seem to be grounded in pacifism, but with no real thought to the consequences of… [more]
  • I Remember My First Period

    Fireworks And Chocolate I think I was about 12 when I got my first period. My dad is a truck driver, and one year me and my mother went on a trip with him in the truck. We were in Las Vegas for 4th of July. The … [more]
  • I Have Been to a Mental Hospital

    Daycare Without The Shoestrings It's just so much like a prison, it's hard to relax. And the waiting. All you do is wait. Maybe 10 minutes with the doctor on the days he comes. I got so frustrated. The staff tell you they're the… [more]
  • I Think Inanimate Objects Have Feelings

    Stuffed Animals Have Feelings, Too Like a lot of other people I always paid attention to the feelings of my stuffed animal friends. :) I used to have a gigantic collection of stuffed animals and beanie babies (… [more]
  • Health Confessions

    Broken Somewhere Deep Inside
    After my husband and I make love, I feel all my emotions flooding out from behind a dam... And they're not good. They're the ones I use medication to control, the ones I have to fight against. I don't do a good job of that. I don't understand why my physical release unleashes this torrent of emotional pain. Last night was amazing. I love my husband. There's nothing wrong there. But suddenly, everything I try to keep from destroying me washes over me and I turn into a helpless knot of despair and tears. Last night it was so bad that I wanted to put a gun in my mouth and end it right then and there. Something in my mind was trying to - and doing an awfully good job of it - convince me that I n… [more]
  • Venting Confessions

    Stand Up For Yourself!
    Look, you tried to KILL yourself because of him. He told you to go kill yourself, so that's what you tried to do. I had to call 911 after you told me you took the pills because you wouldn't. I love you, you're one of my BEST friends, but sometimes, you're so g** d*** f***ing stupid it hurts. I want to help you, but I CAN'T help you unless you are willing to do something to HELP YOURSELF. You won't go to the hospital. You won't leave him. You admit he's bad for you, you know his behavior is inexcusable and unforgivable, but you won't do anything. I am incapable of putting myself in your shoes. I don't get it. You are literally going to die if you stay with him, and all I can do is watch, beca… [more]
  • Health Confessions

    Weaker
    After months of fighting it and an especially bad night last night I gave in.. I started cutting again. I started cutting somewhere new so it would be easier to hide. I don't know how I feel about it... But I want to cut again today, and it would be the third time since I began again.. So this really can't be good. I don't know. I just don't know. I want more. Did I make it easier to cope again, or did I just screw myself up even more? I didn't think it would be as good to cut somewhere else, but it suffices... I just, I do not know what to think. I don't know what to think now.… [more]
  • Health Confessions

    I want revenge.
    I have chronic pain due to fibromyalgia, as well as bipolar type II and a few other things. I am never without pain. It is truly constant. I'm 19, and I've had all of this for years. It's so very tiring. I've been crying today because I'm so tired of fighting it. Suicide has been flitting through my mind today, tempting me, flirting with my despair. I'm not seriously considering it, not right now, but the thought of no pain... It's a pleasant dream. I'm also a cutter. I have been since I was 14 or 15. It peaked when I lost my daughter in 2008. Gradually I have cut less and less, mostly out of a sense of shame, and because when I do cut, I want to cut more and more. I want to cut now. I'm i… [more]
  • Anticipation, Doubt

    Posted on: February 12th, 2010 at 11:59AM

    I wrote this yesterday and felt the need to share it. I feel like I'm the only one in this, sometimes. I know he wants this, too. He wants the house and the land and he's never shown any reluctance. He loves the idea. He says he'll really start to get into the whole thing later, when it's actually within reach. You know - "this is really happening." And I believe him. I do not doubt he wants this. And I know I'mthe brains of the operation. It's always been my dream in the first place. I love when he has something to add and I've always encouraged him to do so. I don't want this to be just my house. I want it to be our house. That's kind of the problem. I'm mostly the only one reading the … [more]

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