holyfreakina 22-25, F

I'm tired of being the care giver of the family. Maybe it's selfish of me I don't know. Nobody in my family seems to understand how hard this is and that might be because none of them will do it. They tell me its because they have their own problems to deal with and they just don't have the time. Don't I though? I cant date or have fun I'm always here. I have my own problems and stress. When do I get to focus on straightening up my life. In 07 I got to watch my gma waste away with cancer. The person closest to me in all the world. I wasn't the only one but I was the one who was chosen to spend the most time there. The one who got the night shift, just me and my gma babbling nonsense and wand… [more]

I am a person who uses self injury as a way of self medication for emotional pain. I was sitting here feeling guilty about things in my life and I had a momentary positive thought. I resisted the temptation to hurt myself and I was proud. It was followed by more guilt. I felt guilty for feeling pride. I realized that this is what society has done to people. They glorify guilt. We are told that when we do something wrong we should feel bad about it because that means we are sorry. This would not necessarily be a bad thing if pride were held in the same regard. We are taught that it is ok to accept praise from another person but to praise oneself is conceit. We are taught to be humble and some… [more]

i just sent an email to this girl i really really like telling her how I feel about here and now i am freaking out. man i wish there was a way to take back clicking that send button. whew deep breaths deep breaths… [more]