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Male , 31-35
IL USA

Last Seen Mar 23, 2013
Member Since Apr 29, 2012
Favorite Quote what does not kill you simply makes you stranger, joker
Heritage
  • a little Polish
  • and a little Italian
  • and a little French
Vices quit my favorite for my job
Politics Moderate
Horoscope Sagittarius
Special day
Books death dealer, wheel of time, dresden files, game of thrones, walking dead
Music NIN, Pantera, coal chamber, the fray, metallica, dance
Movies dark knight, nightmare b4 christmas, aliens, kung-fu panda2, true romance, up, puncture, shutter island
Local Time December 18th, 11:10 AM

I Know That Just Because You Smile Doesnt Mean You Are Happy

Masks smiles to be me is like wearing a mask to convince the world that u are fine and that people will stop asking how u are or whats wrong if u are not smiling. if you smile people will think that u are... [more]
  • I Feel Alone Even When I'm Not

    I Feel Detached From The World i have always like an outsider looking in on people in this world, i cant see how some people can just go on living like they do and why i can never feel like i am a part of anything. I am never into … [more]
  • I Suffer From Clinical Depression

    All My Life i have suffered from depression all of my life, or at least as long as i can remember. always sad, never able to fit in, held myself back as not to stand out, hated being singled out, on and on i coul… [more]
  • I Am Lonely

    Always Lonely hi, new here and felt like getting some words down. like the title says i've always felt lonely and alone my entire life, always had trouble meeting new people and trusted some too easily. especially … [more]
  • I Battle Depression

    The Night Brings The Pain why is it that I get the most down at night? when i am trying to fall asleep those feelings come on like a waterfall. night after night of being alone is the norm i guess. that's how i have felt my wh… [more]
  • Other Confessions

    its winning...
    no, i am not talking about the meds that i am on, and no i am not talking about some inner light or feeling of peace. what is winning is the feeling that i am going be alone for the rest of my life and that scares the hell out of me. all i want is to connect with someone, to have someone care about me, to call me when they are down or that i can call when i feel like this and have no fear of driving them away. i have never felt that, all i see when i look ito the mirror is the person that i hate; the shy guy that doesnt know what to say, the awkward guy that cant make friends easily, that ugly fat piece of crap that i cant get rid of. the mask of happiness and fitting in because i have to is… [more]
  • Venting Confessions

    religion and the bible
    frankly i just think that religion and the bible are just bs. its all about control for the weak minded. I have been on my hands and knees praying that god or something would help me thru my hard times and guess what, nothing? Do i have to pray harder to get heard or go to church and listen to some guy talk about heaven and hell from a book, its just a book. u can take any book and spin the words to mean whatever the hell u want them to mean. look at the movie dogma, where chris rock talks about beliefs and ideas, u change ideas not beliefs. and George Carlin's "Why we dont need the 10 commandments" but dont worry i'll just be burning in a lake, but wait god forgives all right?… [more]