KarchAmadeo 18-21, M

Not quite sure why or how my mind works in the manner it does. One minute it will start on something like a table, next i would be considering how to build a house entirely of wood. Though that was a rather bland example. simply put it, my mind moves from one tangent to another but it is not random thought or ADD. I can easily focus on what im doing and do it quickly; but if I finish any task fast I will begin to over think it which leads me to ponder other subjects related to this which ultimately is rather depressing. For example, I went to Wendy's earlier today and after I paid, while waiting, I began to think about the economy and ways to fix it. long story short, it led to the solution … [more]

seems to be more common within society today, or at least so im told. As a guy in his senior year (17 atm) and actually thinks about thinks critically i cant help but sum up the thought  of "This really sucks".  To simply put it, there is no order. The economy sucks and I cant even find a job, rap music is just **** in my personal standards yet it seems to be the mainstream type now, I cant find a girl who wants me for me and not my body, as the last born and only son im stuck dealing with the crazy crap brought about by my mother and school just sucks. I dont mean this in the generic sense but in the sense that students cannot oppose improper teachings. For example, my english class the oth… [more]

I honestly cannot figure out myself. I can understand others easily with few errors in the matter but I cannot seem to get a grasp on who I am. I know, I'm young and have time to discover myself but that is not the case. Yes, there are things I do but that is more of a manner of faking things. I can spout pretty words yet change nothing. At this point I cannot help but question whether to delete this before it starts to go onto incoherent babble or just go on. I guess it may due to low self-esteem or self-loathing but I have always tried to ignore my life. Childhood died, early on, realization of love was depressing as hell, and general dislike for most mainstream things, yet it never bother… [more]

My entire life's story could be written into a rather odd tragic comedy. Simply put it, every hope that has existed gets crushed almost immediately. Yet, I don't do anything about it. I mean, what is there to do? As a child in elementary school even the teachers noticed this and thought I was bottling up emotions, so I ended up doing this odd child anger management thing which I was kicked out for not being expressive. Afterwards I was put into taekwondo which I ended up quitting because I just felt like it. I was told I had talent in it but I wasn't interested.Later I was told I had to have some way of working out my emotions and by my mothers urging ended up doing therapy during my 7th gra… [more]