Female , 66-70

I feel like slaughtering butterflies and running off into the sunset singing 'Play the Crack Sky' by brand new..

Last Seen Jan 5, 2012
Member Since Feb 21, 2011
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Local Time May 22nd, 8:22 AM

I Hate My Child

Shame I deserve to die. I knew it as soon as Emma was born. Her excessive crying was enough to push me over the edge. I felt anger and shame, an overwhelming feeling of guilt came over me as i contemplated... [more]
Ryuzakiswife13 has shared 3 Mature Experiences
  • I Hate My Body

    A Walrus Without Magical Powers Today, I feel like grabbing a very sharp knife and cutting every part of my body I hate...I feel like screaming, and jumping off of a cliff. I ******* hate it... Last year, I even lost 45 lbs...But no… [more]
  • I Want To Give You This Poem

    Hello, Dear Corrupted Friend You are a buzzing speaker, dressed in black roses You are a guitar without strings, floating up in the sky You are a llama with no feet, singing songs of escape You are a colourful f… [more]
  • I Want To Know Your List Of 10 Things You Look For In A Lover

    The Things I Look For In A Guy/girl These are the things I look in a guy/girl 1) Wizard/Witch heritage 2) We must share a love for cheesy cinema 3) He/she should have a strange and abnormal character 4)… [more]
  • I Used to Cut

    I Still Would... I still would, if it wasn't for all of these people who supposedly care about me and happen to freak out whenever I wear a jacket when it's over 59 degrees... But they don't inquire about my feelings,… [more]
  • Something Weird I Wrote About Switchfoot While I Was Rather Bored...

    Posted on: March 30th, 2011 at 9:35PM

    I was sitting down on the couch after a hard days work. I had just tended to Jethro and Leila's needs. They were most hungry for some delicious oatmeal cookies, so I whipped out my apron and baked for five hours.  They are now happy and asleep... Perhaps me and Jon can get some alone time... But what is Jon doesn't want alone time? What if he feels like I'm forcing it on him? ....Or maybe... Maybe he likes that? .... Just as I was thinking these thoughts, he walked in! My heart was beating from excitement........... He said... "" I responded with a nervous hello... He was wearing his favorite late night 'nobody can see this but you' dress... "Why so nervous?" He, ironically, sa… [more]


  • it is 3:30 am...

    Posted on: March 31st, 2011 at 2:31AM

    Hello, fellow humans...Why must I feel an inner desire within my soul to feel loved...What is the point of feeling loved, anyway?That must be like the most useless emotion of all time...Like, what the ****? Where does this "need" come from?And whenever I want to feel loved I look for it in ******* stupid places.... So I end up just getting pissed!So I guess I am the one mucking up love here....oh well... i still wonder why i feel the need to be loved, deep inside my soulllllllllllllllll.........................… [more]


  • hello there, Penny Pigtails

    Posted on: March 31st, 2011 at 3:34AM

    First off, I would like to say to my zero viewers... Thinking about how so many people have horrible lives depreses me. Thinking about sex trafficking and other **** that goes down 24/7 makes me even more depressed and angry... It doesn't make me feel happy about my current situation... Actually, it makes me feel worse. It makes me feel guilty for not having it as bad as other people do.  And so, if I say i feel like killing myself, I'm not thinking about how bad I have it, I'm thinking about how horrible I feel and then I think about how I'm a worthless piece of **** and I should be raped, sold to some disgusting old man, hurt and other things involving stuff like that. So, I'm not really s… [more]