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Female , 36-40

Last Seen Mar 20, 2013
Member Since Feb 18, 2011
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Local Time September 17th, 5:32 AM

I Live In a Sexless Marriage

Managed To Turn SM Around (update) Just wanted to share my latest updates in case someone in similar situation may find my story of use. As many of you know, my marriage has been sexless for years due to H’s ED which he... [more]
  • I Live In a Sexless Marriage

    Sexless Life With No Light At The End Of The Tunnel... My road to a sexless marriage is long and complicated. When we met I would say my husband’s libido was higher than mine but I don’t remember refusing. Then, as the time went by my libido ke… [more]
  • I Live In a Sexless Marriage

    S*x and Economics I read an interesting book, Spousonomics, that applies principles of economics to marriage. I thought it had some interesting ideas that I wanted to share. I know I posted some of this in my other pos… [more]
  • I Love Dr Seuss

    Cat In The Hat Comes Back I just want to recommend Cat in the Hat Comes Back to all parents out there. I was shocked to read negative reviews that say this book is too violent for kids. This is ridiculous! Since when pop gu… [more]
  • I Am Jealous Of The Ladyb Freedom Tour - I Wanna Go Too

    Envy, Eldest Born Of Hell (handel) AGRRRR!!!!! Feel like I am turning into a green-eyed monster myself :)… [more]
  • School Confessions

    The Unbearable Lightness of Being
    This morning as I ran into Starbucks to get another cup of coffee on my way to work I mentioned a student.  She was sitting on the patio with her cup of coffee, her legs stretched out, utterly relaxed, reading Lolita.  She is probably a student, most likely a graduate student.  Suddenly, I felt this deep nostalgia for my college days when I could afford to spend my mornings reading Kundera, Tolkien, etc.  I had this epiphany: my best days are behind me.  I know the saying “the best is yet to come” but how can any time period in a person’s life beat these financially poor but care-free days?  I have much more income these days but it does not make up for the lost enjoyment of just reading a b… [more]
  • The two sides of the sexless marriage coin

    Posted on: October 13th, 2011 at 10:06PM

    Side 1: ILIASM friend comes home from a long trip hoping for some TLC from his wife.  She leads him on but refuses him in the end.  Side 2: My H comes home from Japan (also a very long trip) and his wife (myself) is hoping for some TLC.  After about an hour of sexless affection I finally ask about the real stuff.  H’s response my sex overture: Can I get a break at least after Japan?  I just got home!  And of course asking for sex directly is always a turn-off.  H always claims that what I do just does not work for men in general.   If I did not see the other side, I would think there is never a good time for sex.   … [more]

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  • Q: How long can my H ignore our SM? A: Forever

    Posted on: April 8th, 2011 at 9:47PM

    Wall Street Journal published an op-ed, titled "The Secret to a Happy Marriage: Do the Dishes, Put Out, Don’t Talk So Much.”  The article lists 5 tips on improving your marriage.  The excerpt is below: ___________________ 1.  Talk less Overloading your spouse with what you consider to be perfectly valid information is a bad idea. One thing at a time, friends, and the most important thing first. Same rule applies when you’re arguing. Stick to the point—he didn’t call to say he was running late—and don’t tick off the long list of sins he’s committed since last Tuesday. 2. Lose weight. Married people exercise less than single people do. I know this because married couples have told me so—56% of… [more]

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  • On kids and marriage

    Posted on: May 5th, 2011 at 9:40PM

    While searching around the blogosphere I stumbled on this interview of Ian Kerner, some famous sex therapist I never heard of before.  This is an excerpt from his interview that I found interesting:Q:  Kids: Good for marriage or bad?A: Terrible. In reviewing a book on parental happiness by Arthur Brooks entitled “Gross National Happiness,” says The Economist, “When researchers ask what parents enjoy, it turns out they prefer almost anything to looking after their children. Eating, shopping, cooking, praying, and watching television were all rated more pleasurable than watching the brats, even if they don’t bite. As Brooks put it: ‘There are many things in a parent’s life that brings great jo… [more]

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  • Therapist selection

    Posted on: February 10th, 2012 at 9:17PM

    So we finally picked a therapist.  We started with a 4-page list of certified sex therapists in our area.  Then we eliminated everyone who is younger than us; we both agreed that we can’t be comfortable talking to a recent college grad.  Then we eliminated all therapists who used in their philosophy description words “holistic”, “hypnosis”, and “yoga”.  Finally we narrowed down on two therapists whose narrow specialty description was the closest to sexless marriage.  The list of therapists who specialize in sex addiction was much longer.  Almost all of them listed that as their area of expertise.  (Is sex addiction that much more common than sexless marriage????)  Between the two therapists… [more]

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