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Female , 31-35
Feeling thoughtful
...one day at a time...

Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world.

Last Seen Aug 7
Member Since Nov 28, 2011
Favorite Quote We must be our own before we can be another\'s
Heritage
  • 100% Unknown
Vices mindlessly fighting my demons
Politics
Horoscope
Special day
Books mostly the classics
Music pillar, fuel, soil, breaking benjamin, eminem, linkin park, five finger death punch, staind
Movies garden state, the secret window, the breakfast clib, pretty in pink
Local Time September 20th, 9:28 AM

I Am Friendless

My family and I have been living here for almost 2 years now, and still I have no friends. I don't go out to search for friends, that's for sure. And I'm unable to accept friendships as they happen... [more]
strangerinacrowd has shared 1 Mature Experience
  • I Have Been to a Mental Hospital

    Chose The Best Choice For Me its been almost 4 years, and I remember it like it was yesterday. Oy, isn't that how most stories begin? There is nothing like a cliche to begin my narrative... I felt like I was doing th… [more]
  • I Am Having An Affair

    My Little Share Of The World its been over a year now that I've been having an affair. Before this began I never thought in a million years that this would ever ever happen. I thought only trashy women or sleazy men had affairs.I… [more]
  • I Am Having An Affair

    Nevermore When we first started secretly seeing each other, he told me if i cut all ties with him - like not talking, texting or calling him back, he would seriously be hurt. It has been over a month that… [more]
  • I Have Been to a Mental Hospital

    I Dug Myself A Hole now i must face the consequences. … [more]
  • Other Confessions

    identity
    there are so many more things that i want to do with my life.  i want to go skydiving, get a tatoo, go to where my husband was born, and so on.  it seems that i'm here at my computer not knowing what to say, not making one hell of a difference to anyone.  i tune in to ep, my one friend has written all of these wonderful magnetic realist images rolling through her mind, that she can write about.  not me.  what, am i afraid?  afraid of what?  afraid someone will catch on and see the real me?  afraid that my husband will find my password and see what i've been hiding? i feel nothing, numb, like ice held on skin too long.  frigid and cold.  missing that element of lighting a flame underneath me,… [more]
  • Health Confessions

    I'm what?!?!
    for years now, I've known I've been clinically depressed. It's genetic, so it has been passed down from my grandmother, my mother, and my sister. I hate hate HATE knowing that for every single solitary day, until the day I die, I will have to be on medication. I have a pill case that I fill, or don't fill....every week. Every month or so I think 'oh! I'll be fine...' & so I quit taking any of my meds cold turkey. Huh, wish I could do that with smoking! But that's a different story. along with anti-depressants, I'm also on meds for my thyroid, blood pressure, anti-anxiety, among others. So, every day, I'm SUPPOSED to take about 8 pills every day. Some months I may go about a week w/o any meds… [more]
  • Love Confessions

    totally indescribable
    it was our last time together today, before i go off to my new job on monday.  we have been totally infatuated with one another and truly loved one another for over 2 years now.  we started working together, and it took off from there.  we knew it was wrong:  we both had our own separate families, with kids, but we were devious, daring, full of vengance to be together...it gave the chances we had to be alone together all the more erotic and exciting.he truly gave me all that he was holding back before...he told me his confession after seeing me that first time, he knew he wanted me.  neither of us had originally thought in a million years that we would ever have an affair.  yet here we were,… [more]
  • Offtopic Confessions

    i confess
    that i want to hurt myself every damn day.  not a day goes by without at least one of those thoughts running through my head. i know i have a family who loves me and kids, blah blah blah!!!  i just want to feel me in there.  am i still alive inside?… [more]
  • strange world

    Posted on: September 18th, 2013 at 7:54AM

    Everyone and their brother know that this world and everyone's life in it for that matter, is strange and unusual,and so very unique...but riddle methisAbout 2 months agoI came into work, and my office mates husband had  a massive heart attack and died suddenly.  That same day, a provider's husband who supervises one of my individuals died onthe same day.  And now, I found that my supervisor's Aunt passed the sameday as one ofmy individuals mothers. Is thata coincedence?  everything comes in threes, sowhat'saround thenext corner in my life?  Do I believe in fate or destiny?  I still needto figure that one.the other day I saw a bumper sticker on a car in front of me that read --              … [more]

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  • the real me

    Posted on: November 15th, 2012 at 11:03PM

    a thought just popped into my head:  the reason i write (or type would be more appropriate) on ep, is not so strangers will feel sorry for me.  its so i can let out the pain & emotions i have.  yes, i am a pessimist...and yes, words are easier said than done.  but that's not the whole me.i am a bright and charming woman with much to offer.  i just got this great job that's a whole lot better (paying) than my last.  we just rented this great house about 35 minutes from where i work.  we have always lived in apartments, but i like having space that is ours...even if it is just rented space.  2 floors, 3 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms, a yard that's fenced in, with a playground in the back for my litt… [more]

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  • tonight

    Posted on: May 11th, 2012 at 10:51PM

    Friday after work. Was hoping that my folks would make allowances & let me have some time for me. That is what they, especially my dad always talk to me about. Getting/making some time for me...in amongst the boys, husband, housework & such. I try to do everything & be everywhere I'm needed at all times. Anyhow, got my hopes dashed when mom told me they were going out to dinner w/ their friends. Damn my parents & their social lives!! So i dropped the big boy off w/ his friend & home i went unwillingly w/ the little one. I dont really know the people they went out to eat w/, nor their daughter who is about my age. The daughter, D, went to the private high school in town, which makes me think … [more]

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