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My Sister Molested Me

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Anonymous User

Posted by Anonymous
on May 31st, 2010 at 12:14 PM


        I'm not exactly sure when the abuse started, I might have been 4 or 5 maybe even younger when my own sister started molesting me. She is 9 years older than me she would make me go in her room with her when my parents weren't home and get under the sheets naked and take my clothes off and grind all over me. She would tell me not to tell anyone but our brothers knew and they didn't say anything either. Sometimes she would tell me that she was afraid that I would grow up and write a book about it and tell the world what she did to me, and then sometimes she would tell me that it was okay. For the longest time I thought that was we were doing was normal, she was my big sister and I really looked up to her.  

      The abuse stopped when I was 9 that's when I started to realize it wasn't okay and that I had been molested, but I never talked about it to anyone because of embarrassment and shame I felt as if I was the wrong one and that I would get in trouble. When I was 16 my eldest brother who is schizophrenic had a episode and called me a lesbian and said that I was nasty I screamed at him telling him that I was just a little girl and she took advantage of me. He only continued called me a hoe and saying it wasn't my sisters fault and that I wanted it to happen. Later on that day my mom asked me about it she told me she never knew my sister molested me (I always thought she knew) she gave me a hug and told me she knew it probably really hurt me and that she was sorry she did not know. My mom never told my dad knowing he would freak out and I know she would get mad if I told him. For a week I felt as if my mom was on my side until she told me that she wouldn't confront my sister about it because she didn't want to hurt her feelings. Every time I think about it I wonder if my feelings ever really matter to her, she loves my sister she is her pride and joy. My mom always says that she is such a good person and has a great personality yet she always says I'm mean and evil. I feel like I tainted the pedestal she put my sister on so instead of being mad at her she holds resentment for me. That is just a small part of what I have gone through because of what my sister did to me. S.N: More confessions to come





 

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4 Comments (add your own)

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  1. college101 - 31-35 years old - female

    Posted by college101 on May 31st, 2010 at 12:16 PM

    wow sometimes older siblings can be so messed up

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  2. kikizz - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by kikizz on May 31st, 2010 at 12:31 PM

    No...this is not good. Please know that your mother is verry wrong and actually encouraging the fact that this happened to you by covering it up. Your older sister is mentally disturbed...moreso than your schizophrenic brother. She may grow up to molest kids...please pray to God that she gets punished for what she has done to you so that she may see the error of her ways...though, it is likely, she already knows it was wrong. Everyone of age knows that molestation is wrong. I am so glad that you seem to be such a good person,. Remember that the world hated Jesus too and killed him though he did not once sin. He is our savior. He is the one who shows us mercy when we ask forgiveness. Your sister may never receive forgiveness and it may very well be your mothers fault for not adressing the issue. Perhaps you could adress the issue through email...? IDK but please pray and I will pray for you...for comfort.

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  3. sparkledust - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by sparkledust on May 31st, 2010 at 1:50 PM

    Usually kids who molest or abuse smaller children are being molested or abused themselves. Most kids go through a normal sexual exploration phase, but when a kid or a very young adolescent suddenly becomes hypersexual, there's usually a reason behind it. I hate that your sister inflicted what was probably her own pain and inner turmoil on you. The fact that she continued to do it for so long indicates that she was severely damaged and disturbed herself. It sounds like you need to confront her about it if you haven't already. She needs to face up to what she did and she needs to work through whatever drove her to do it in the first place. It sounds like individual counseling would be best for both of you. Your parents are obviously torn about the situation and behaving in a completely inappropriate way. Perhaps one of them was involved in molesting your older sister...who knows? That's just one hypothesis. Families often feel a great deal of shame about situations such as these, particulary one that is incestuous (not to mention homosexual) in nature. I would try my best to not take anything that they say to heart from this point on. They're only speaking from guilt at not protecting you and shame that it ever happened in the first place. You need to talk to your sister, though, and both of you need to seek out the help that you need. Good luck.

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  4. jeordieeh - 26-30 years old

    Posted by jeordieeh on July 29th, 2013 at 5:14 AM

    I realize this is old, but do you see how when you didn't know it was molestation, you were fine? Then you realized how negatively people view the situation and that put a deep impact on you thinking it was terribly wrong. I'm not saying it was right, but these are human emotions that society is bearing down on you with.

    You would be surprised how common sexual interaction is between children. While it is embarrassing for all family members involved, your mom figures to leave well enough alone. I know people hear about it and how negative it is and people suddenly become more victimized then ever and you are searching for a bad guy and are making yourself out to be more of a victim by thinking your mom isn't concerned for you. It is hard for people to understand how you are feeling. However it is best to know these are only human emotions. It's easier to get over them when you truly understand how stupid we as humans are and how we become our own victims by being brain washed by what society expects of us. When we break these bonds with religious, society at large, and all this authoritarianism, we can step outside all of this and just get on with living with out all this neurosis.

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  5. smaxam - 46-50 years old - male

    Reply by smaxam Oct 24th, 2013 at 11:42AM

    Jeordieeh, I am awarding you the OSPIA award. It's the Only Sane Person in America award. Uh, actually, there is at least one other person, me.

    Reply

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