Posted by RoaringFlameLostinShadow
on June 8th, 2011 at 10:10 PM
I remember when I first came to EP and how I viewed as a microcosm for life. It seemed that everything that happened in life got representation through EP. I was inspired to seek a family unit in EP, ironclad friendships that would last and endure through the ages. What a folly that was of mine for slowly my circle withered, dwindled to a mass of people admittedly that I didn't even know. To date, I've met two people through EP: the first meeting went well and we never spoke again, the second person who has met me as a result of EP has the singular distinction of being one of the few people to even see and make me cry. Although you would cry too I think if for a moment you thought that this would be your last chance to feel this particular feeling as I did. Yes, you have your oddball successful EP romance that plays out into real life and you even have a few who manage to make unbelievably successful connections offline as well as on but those are the exceptions to the rule rather than the standard. In the end, EP is kind of like a rehabilitation unit. The plan being to get you to a point where you can be self sufficient in life and not require EP in any really serious fashion. There are those who never reach that point. I saw someone on here one day who said and I quote 'they were not here to make friends' and true to their word - their circle was empty. Devoid of anyone in it, months ago this would have perplexed me and I would have been driven to challenge the presence of someone who wasn't prepared to be a productive member of the community. This time around, I understood perfectly her stance and I wondered how many other silent runners were out there. Writing but never communicating, opting to say their piece and remain ethereal and out of reach. I have a chance to meet some who are in my circle and after careful consideration, I confess I don't see myself meeting them. I wanted to get close for the longest time but I remind myself now that this is the internet . . . at the end of the day, I know about as much of them as they do about me which is truly very little indeed when you don't spend serious regular time around someone. My point is why shred a blanket of anonymity now? I'm in rehab with the clearly stated goal being one day to not rely on EP. Yes some will scream 'if you don't like EP then get the f*** out of here' but it's really not a matter of liking or disliking EP. EP serves a function for now even if it is clouded and murky, until my life can be adjusted to fulfill those functions . . . EP is what I've got.
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