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I think my Cyber Relationship is Getting Real! And i am falling in love....

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sophie0318 - 22-25 years old - female

Posted by sophie0318
on October 8th, 2011 at 3:31 PM


I am a 22-year old Asian girl who is fond of Social Networking Sites. I had a boyfriend for years and after so many months of misunderstandings, we finally broke up. It was really such a depressing breakup and i am working out for that depression for months. 

Until one day, i opened one of my social networking account and i found a private message from this certain European guy. Let me call him Kyle. He's a year older than me. He said "hi, sophie". I found that i also had a friend request from him. I found him really cute on his pictures that's why i accepted him and i replied on his message. He replied back in an instant and from there, our conversation started. That same day, he asked me if i want to be his girlfriend. Coming from a breakup, i thought of giving into this "little fun" as i r thought that this was just a simple "flirting" on chat as a pastime on that night and this will just happen once. Yes, he was already my new boyfriend that same night... that one night of chat. After hours of chatting, i finally said goodbye as i wanted to take a rest already. He asked me to stay a few minutes for awhile. I asked him why. He told me we just have to agree on our "schedule" first. I found out and thought that this guy might have really liked me. I told him that my being online is irregular and i am not sure if i will be on tomorrow. He just said that i'll just try to send him offline message on his PM so that he'll know what i do, where am i, etc. That same night he told me that he IS serious about me and if he's not, he won't be spending that long night talking with me. He even told me that he means everything he said and he is serious about coming here in our country to meet me! I don't wanna believe fast... and i just played along. 

The next night... i got curious. I opened that Social Networking site and found him again. And we chat again. He asked me my messenger because of course, communicating thru messenger is much more easier and convenient. Then, we talked long hours AGAIN.

The next days, i signed online on my phone and there, we continued to chat. That night after we talked, I was already thinking. I asked myself, "what is this?" "is this real?" For him, what we have is a true relationship. For me, i just want to ride along with everything happening to us 'coz i am enjoying it. I enjoy the appreciation.... i'm loving the attention. He sends me offline message informing me of what he does. Later on, i do what he does as well. He is only available during the weekends because he is working during the days. He can't possibly spend long hours of chatting during the weekdays when he have work as he only goes to a computer shop to talk to me. He is and art teacher. It compliments my schedule as well coz i am still studying and working part-time as well. So our chat schedule is only during the weekends. 

2 weeks after being a couple, we had our first live chat! My little attraction to him grew. I know he feels the same way too. We talked for 6 hours! And by hearing his voice... I started to become confused already. Coz what i thought at the start as such a simple chat flirting only, i feel is becoming real. No, this is not flirting anymore i told myself. For Kyle, this is not flirting as well. Or maybe he thought of flirting at the start too, but then as we go along, this "online relationship" is becoming a "real relationship" already. And our communication continues. During the weekdays, we send each other offline messages and tell stories of what we do. Kyle is a very sweet guy. Though we are not physically together, it is only from him that i got this kind of care and appreciation i never experienced from my past relationship. He listens every time, and my every word is important to him. Like when i talk about courtship that is a culture here in country wherein a guy should pursue a girl he wants before he could get her... he even asked me to write it coz for him, it is very important for him to know about it. 

He never fails to meet me online. We are of different time zones, and we both try to meet on our agreed time schedule of the day. He kept on assuring me that everything about us is real, and if only i should trust him completely and we continue to be company even as online as for the moment, he's gonna commit really. Most of the time, he doesn't need to assure me, coz by his words, i feel his sincerity. 

The problem is, we needed to wait 2 more years before he can go here in my country. He needs to save money for his expenses for coming here, and aside from that, wait as well for his friend to finish college and after that his friend will work as well and save money too, coz it was already their initial plan of really going here in the first place. And now, he said his aim is to save money for him to be able to go here.

Aside from the excitement that we are feeling now, I'm kinda scared because i am not sure if relationships that started from the cyber environment really gets real. Right now, i've already started to invest real feelings for him already and i'm sure he as well coz i feel it from him. I just want to know if THIS is really possible. I would like to know if online relationships on some people really gets real...

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8 Comments (add your own)

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  1. avibot - 31-35 years old - male

    Posted by avibot on October 8th, 2011 at 4:19 PM

    hi. where can i find a summary of this?

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  2. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  3. dreamsnevergone - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by dreamsnevergone on October 8th, 2011 at 4:20 PM

    I met my girlfriend online, and yes we fell in love but me and here lived in the same country. I live in the USA and met another girl in germany, we had a connection, but the relationship couldn't work because we were too far away. So she started to like me as a friend which sucks.





    But I do believe in faith, love etc. If he seems alright, and not crazy I say go for it, but 2 years is a long wait.....

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  4. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  5. sophie0318 - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by sophie0318 on October 8th, 2011 at 4:29 PM

    hi dreamsnevergone, i would want to go for it, but yet im a bit scared. you see, im only 22 he's 23... a lot of things may happen still. this is sooo exciting but have some doubts how far this will take us... but as we both always say, "we'll see, we'll see"...



    and yes, 2 years is quite long... he still has to save money for coming here and he'll be going with his friend who will just graduate this year and who will still get a job too to save money for visiting my country.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  6. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  7. sophie0318 - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by sophie0318 on October 8th, 2011 at 4:30 PM

    hi avibot, i don't have a summary of this story...

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  8. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  9. dreamsnevergone - 18-21 years old - female

    Posted by dreamsnevergone on October 8th, 2011 at 7:04 PM

    Do you feel like this guy may be the one, how long have ya'll been actually talking?





    Im my opinion , to meet someone in a different country, their definitely has to be love involve.





    But...it kind of weird that he ask you out on the first night. I mean from my analysis, it's like he planned it or whatever.... but in other words, i started dating my girl the 3rd day we talked...so idk maybe you can see he similarities.

    Reply | 2dislike | Flag

  10. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  11. sophie0318 - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by sophie0318 on October 11th, 2011 at 1:13 PM

    dreamsnevergone,



    i can't say that this guy may be the one. but just this time i had this really amazing connection with someone. we really have this connection online... then what more when we come to finally meet in the future?!? we are already 1 month talking. we have this schedule... during the weekdays we send offline message since we are busy in work and school. during the weekdays, that's when we talk for hours.



    yes, you are right, definitely there has to be love involve. he tells me, "i couldn't wait for the time when i tell you face to face... sophie, i love you... right before your eyes" me too... would like to tell this to him... for both of us those are really special words, would really mean a lot to tell in person.



    yeah its kinda weird he asked me on the first night. me too agreed, coz i thought i would just like to have some fun and pass away time that night. maybe he had the same thoughts too... but then as time goes, seems like this is not just flirting anymore. i appreciate that he has to exert effort to go to a computer shop everytime as we talk for hours. what we're talking about, most of the time... is serious. and what made you say the it's like he planned it or whatever?



    i really don't know... as this is the first time that i've gotten into this cyber-relationship thing

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  12. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  13. donotaddme - 26-30 years old - female

    Posted by donotaddme on November 15th, 2011 at 6:37 AM

    I think he is infatuated with you, and yours too with him. On first day of conveys, he ask you if you want to be his girl and you said sure. I have talk to many guys like that online. Most who said I love you on first talks, am really annoyed.

    but hey...good luck on both of you.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  14. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

  15. sophie0318 - 22-25 years old - female

    Posted by sophie0318 on November 15th, 2011 at 6:41 AM

    thanks...

    actually he didn't say "i love you" on our first talks (and i got annoyed by it too). it happened after the first month of our relationship.

    we are on our 2nd month now. i'm not sure if its love or infatuation... i cannot determine... ^^

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  16. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Dec 18th, 2014 at 5:36PM

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