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Lonely at Christmas? Me too

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TatterdHeart - 46-50 years old - female

Posted by TatterdHeart
on December 23rd, 2011 at 9:37 PM

The holidays are not a good time for me. I have too many bad memories I guess. When I was a kid my grandmother died on Thanksgiving. My mom went on antidepressants and pretty much retreated into her own world. When she finally came out of it she was mean and nothing was ever the same. Dad was no help whatsoever.

When I was married my ex started cheating just before Christmas. Took all the money out of my checking account to buy his gf and her kids presents. Merry Christmas. At the time my boss told me 2 days before Christmas that my full time job was being cut back to 20 hours, and it would take effect January 1st. Happy New Year.  So glad those days are long gone.

I've been divorced for 5 years. Can't say that I miss his cheating a$$. My main problem is that Christmas is a holiday for families. It is a time when you spend your days with people you love and show them how much you love them. Because of my busy lifestyle I don't really have time to meet anybody. I have friends, but they all have spouses and this time of year nobody wants to hang out with friends if you have a spouse. I know I shouldn't complain, but the one thing I wish I had was comanionship. I don't mind being alone most of the time, but this is the time of the year I just want to have somebody around who cares about me. Am I bad to wish for that? I am a decent person. I give my friends stuff all the time, not just at Christmas. I don't use them or take advantage of their talents or skills. I do what I can to make them happy to be my friends. But I miss that intimacy with another human being.

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  1. nosuninmysky - 26-30 years old - male

    Posted by nosuninmysky on December 23rd, 2011 at 9:50 PM

    You absolutely deserve that in your life. it is programmed in us from birth. And when you are alone, it is an endless aching need that is torture. Good luck in your pursuit in having a special companion who realizes how great you are to be around, and keeps coming back for more, because they see the joy you bring to them, and they gravitate to your uniqueness.

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  2. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User May 23rd, 2015 at 6:10AM

Experience Project is a community based on authenticity, support, and respect. EP encourages you to post with these values in mind.

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