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jeremyleaves - 26-30 years old - male

Posted by jeremyleaves
on February 22nd, 2012 at 3:24 AM

I once loved so deeply it almost consumed me. After all that forgiveness was beyond me. It is one of my weak points. Without betrayal I have few flaws. But still I wonder.. If it all might have been salvageable. But a true heart shouldn't have to expect to need to forgive. Should it? I have never left something dying on my doorstep. Nor have I been kind to that broken thing crawling back to it. I guess I am as confused as anything. Confused as is capable. But still I wonder. I try to better myself. So that if that moment comes I will know the difference. between that, and many a thing. And perhaps maybe I contemplate too hard. I have readied myself for the harsh life ahead. Ready for whatever comes. I don't believe in love; but I Know I once did. I know It wasn't a matter of believing; I just knew. Any thoughts? I find it difficult ignoring my mind and my heart. But I also know that I shouldn't have really sacrifice if it is real. That it will be as natural as breathing. But I don't expect anything. I just live, every day. I feel like a widower. Like the love I once had, just died one day. The only tragedy is that the other person stopped seeing in me; what I saw in them. The coldness and disconnectedness I experienced that day, I well expect to haunt me until I die again. But who knows.. not me.. I never lost control..

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  1. jeremyleaves - 26-30 years old - male

    Posted by jeremyleaves on February 22nd, 2012 at 3:46 AM

    yes, but obstacles are annoying once you have learned the coarse. Everyone wants to return to a place from hence their heart sprung. Even when the well is poisoned. In other words love is ****. The wise would just avoid it, and pillage the world for what it is really good for; temporary pleasures and things. Only fools expect more. I am a complete fool. Wisdom and knowledge aside; my heart plays the fool. So I leave it locked in asylum.

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  2. Anonymous

    Reply by An EP User Apr 21st, 2015 at 5:01AM

Experience Project is a community based on authenticity, support, and respect. EP encourages you to post with these values in mind.

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