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Sorrow..

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Tatteredheart - 16-17 years old - male

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Posted by Tatteredheart
on June 2nd, 2012 at 11:43 PM


When I use to cut...it took so much off my head. When I would watch the blood drain off my hand I would picture it as the things that made me hurt the most. And tricked myself into liking the pain.
When I use to cut I would cry so hard I would have a horrid head ache from it. It felt like my my head was gonna pop. I thought about over dozing on tylenol but I didn't. I just couldn't.
But what I do now is worse than cutting. I starve myself. Until about yesterday I was eating right. But then my brain litteraly blew out of proportion and pushed out the thoughts of eating. I'm freaking out...I hope I can stop again..

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3 Comments (add your own)

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  1. Posted by An EP User on June 2nd, 2012 at 11:50 PM

    You need to eat =[

    Reply | 2dislike | Flag

  2. Tatteredheart - 16-17 years old - male

    Reply by Tatteredheart Jun 2nd, 2012 at 11:51PM

    I know. But its hard. I constantly think I'm over weight :(

    Reply

  3. shineaway12 - 13-15 years old - female

    Reply by shineaway12 Jun 3rd, 2012 at 5:11PM

    Your not overweight at at, your really thin. And i know that's hard to believe, because that's what you mind will say- it will say, no, no your not.

    Reply

  4. nayhomi - 22-25 years old

    Posted by nayhomi on June 2nd, 2012 at 11:54 PM

    damn dude im so sorry! good job for being open about your pain that is hard to do! If you are having a hard time the dr might be able to help you out or even webmd if you arent comfortable going to the docs office. I say go outside sitdown on your lawn and just look deep down at the roots and ground and all the little outdoorcreatures doing their buggy buisness..think about yourself and think about your likes and dislikes things that you wouldnt tell another soul. You are intelligent enough to know this isnt healthy than you are intelligent enough to help yourself. And im sure seeing a counsellor would help..i used to be against them but honestly they just want to focus on you they dont really poke around unless u let them they went through all the schooling because they want to help people. and it is nice to have someone just give a sh it about you for a small amount time and make you feel like your human!



    hope you succeed man!

    Reply | 2dislike | Flag

  5. Tatteredheart - 16-17 years old - male

    Reply by Tatteredheart Jun 3rd, 2012 at 12:00AM

    Thank you so much :) I need to go to a conselour but my parents at I can help myself. I think that's so major bs though. It breaks me to know that they don't want to be apart of my life but its okay. Thank you again.

    Reply

  6. nayhomi - 22-25 years old

    Reply by nayhomi Jun 3rd, 2012 at 12:06AM

    your parents are f uck in bs! my dad made me go to the counsellour before i could do ANYTHING because he was concerned about me. I do however have a bi polar ********* "mother" who is like your parents in the fact that she doesnt give a sh it really. I say if your in school whether it be highschool or college go to the school counsellor your parents can suck it if they wanna treat you that way. srry for getting so worked up its just bad news bad bad news if they are ignoring your pain. if you cant go to a school councellor than id say find a hotline and call em up they would be able to talk to you and/or set you up with the assistance you need :) Im glad you are open to my words man

    Reply

    2 more replies
  7. scatterheart - 13-15 years old - female

    Posted by scatterheart on June 3rd, 2012 at 1:17 AM

    Wow... I'm sitting here wanting to just hold you for a few hours until you completely relax and release...>.< listen to nayhomi, she knows what she's talking about. My heart goes out to you.

    Reply | 1dislike | Flag

  8. Tatteredheart - 16-17 years old - male

    Reply by Tatteredheart Jun 3rd, 2012 at 1:20AM

    Yeah she is amazing :). And thanks love. *hugs*

    Reply

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