Let Me Know
Posted by Anonymous
on November 17th, 2012 at 5:30 PM
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Folks who feel the need to ask their partners or family members for "space" are likely introverts who need time to themselves for the sake of their mental health...yet there are those who are SO emotionally insecure that they perceive this need for space as a personal "attack." My dad is one of those people. He is filled with love, yes, but he is also anxiety-ridden and filled with trained self-loathing. And he has often said words like the ones in the original post, but they come across so often as emotionally manipulative and energy-stealing, guilt-tripping the one actually asking for space into giving him constant reassurance that the space request is not intended as a hurtful thing or that the person requesting time alone is truly not angry, least of all with
him. So my advice to ANYONE who is extroverted and loves an introvert: your introverted lover or family member does not love you any less just because they ask for space. We introverts are simply more self-contained, quite often psychically/empathically sensitive and we need time to "decompress" after school or work. We often need time to shake off the negative vibes from where we've been and how we do this often necessitates a certain amount of alone time. If expected to interact with people before we've had our alone time, you can be assured we are likely going to be wound up and hyper, unable to focus on much else. I cannot explain it any more than this. My intention here was to inform, not criticize. <3
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