People, self-image, etc.

I've always identified as female. Always. I wouldn't play with the boys when I was a kid, no, I was always with the others girls. People thought I was a little odd, but that's them. I am who I am.
But there is this constant fear of people knowing and of secrets being told, especially when you pile secret upon secret. The only I fear though, is my secret. I'm trans. Mtf. My secret is the pain it causes me, the hell I've endured, and the people I've known who accept this part of me. One of them actually told me once, she could never see me as a guy, only a woman. This touched me to the core of my being.
Another one I'm absolutely flattered by is here on EP. We've been pals, yeah, good pals. We've laughed together, cried together, given each other advice, and have been tough through it all. Even when I went through a (rather pathetic) phase of trying to actually be a man, she would not call me by my name...granted she had other reasons, but it's still touching to me. And how we've never really gotten in to too much of an argument surprises me, pleasantly. Conflicting personalities and all. But she's a sweetie! ^-^
My mum knows, and she is greatly accepting. House rules include using feminine pronouns for me. Just for Maia and Emolia, no one else really lives here, lol.
Most of my friends don't know, and it's perfectly fine. We'll grow apart anyway. I'll have new friends come and go. That's life. For now, I do what I gotta do. ^-^

Thanks for reading my rant, cya! ^-^

-Amber D.