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  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    Those Certain Ones

    from Other confessions

    Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 0

  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    The guilt I feel encompasses my whole being

    from Venting confessions

    I'm so filled with guilt. You're my biological mother, but I haven't been your daughter for years. You haven't been my mom, either, though. Sure, you may mean well, and you're persistent. But what you don't realize is the fact that you are wrong. You need to change, not for me, not for anyone but yourself. I want to see you happy, but I'm done trying because I have myself to worry about currently. I'm sorry I'm not the daughter you want, but we're just not close. I feel so guilty, tense, anxious thinking about this, and at times, it consumes me. Let's hope we can accredit these horrific feelings to that special time of month, but if we can't, I fear for myself.Sigh. When does it end? When do… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 0

  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    This is for those who kindly responded, Thank You.

    from Other confessions

    First off, thank you.Secondly, in response to your comments, I'll let you know that I've had a lot of problems in my life (family) from seeing my mother get abused, her blaming me for the failure of my parents' marriage, my mother getting abused, my dad forcing my mother to get two abortions, my father kicking my mother in the stomach when she was 6 months pregnant with me in hopes that I would not survive, my father marrying my mother just for a greencard, etc, etc. Throughout everything, my parents never once stopped and asked me how I was doing, how I was taking everything, so I dealt with everything by myself until I was 16, at which point someone actually asked me about my life, so I op… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 1

  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    I'm ready to ask for help.

    from Other confessions

    I'm not okay. I have strange thoughts. I don't know where my life is going anymore. I have trouble concentrating. I'm ready to ask for help. I don't want to go into a dark place.… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 3

  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    It Has Been A While

    from Other confessions

    I know I've been MIA for sometime, but hey, we all get busy, right?So, here's all the news y'all have missed out on.Boys: noneSchool: it's summer, although summer classes begin soon.Hmm, friends: made my first real one this year. couldn't be happier with the outcome. first person to ever stand up for me regardless of the fact that maybe other circumstances never called for such behavior.Family: can't even stand it.So, hey, let's get real. The reason I'm blogging again. I don't know what's wrong. I barely leave the house. I've been focusing on toning up my body. I don't want to hang out with anyone, really. I feel anxious and usually am unlikely to leave the house after 9 pm. Who knows what's… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 0

  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    When there remains no hope

    from Love confessions

    What does one do when there remains no hope? When he or she has no excitement in regards to the future? What do you do when the one person who you thought cared about you more than anything doesn't show you are important? I don't want to know specific things. I just wanted to know that I was important enough to tell. He says these things that should make me feel special, but I have trouble believing them. It doesn't matter that he says them once I show concern. They mean nothing. He can go to his family for support. My family isn't exactly perfect that I could go to them. He doesn't see that he's being selfish. He got hurt by my mean sayings, but I was hurt more. I trusted him with my life,… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 1

  • thisgirl89 - 18-21 years old - female

    A hopeless epiphany

    from Other confessions

    I have recently realized that I do not trust anyone in my life. I am incapable of love because for me, love stems from complete trust, and I cannot trust anyone. More than anything, I wish I had a normal life. I have witnessed countless fights and arguments growing up regarding issues from adultery to abuse. I have always been blamed for their mistakes, but I've come to accept that it isn't entirely my fault. I just don't know how to live a life where no one cares. I don't understand why we live a life simply awaiting death. I know my views are cynical, but I just realized that I cannot trust anyone. It is safe to say that I am crushed. It has gone to the point where I even considered join… [more]

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    By: thisgirl89 | Comments 6

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