A few nights ago I had a very strange dream , unlike any other I have ever had before. In my dream I was meeting up with friends, acquaintances, some strangers, and even family, each individually, each in a different place. Each one was talking about how they didn't want to live anymore and how they wanted me to kill them. Without any hesitation, I killed them. As soon as I did, people, who seemed to be my workers, came in and would take the body. Afterwards I would look out the window and see them dragging the body into my backyard knowing that's where they we going to be buried. Later on in the dream I remember walking into a room and saw my boyfriend who appeared to be dead on the floor from committing suicide. I immediately ran and started crying uncontrollably and questioned everything. Like why did he do it? Why couldn't he come to me with his problems? Maybe I could have prevented this. Then I started to feel so guilty that I didn't try and help the people who came to me to kill them. It was the first time I thought of myself as a murder instead of someone who was helping. I ended up in my room at my house and just sat there in misery. Then I heard the door open and shut and footsteps coming up the stairs the same way it sounds when my boyfriend comes home. He busted through the door and was his normal self. I started to tell him that I knew that he tried to commit suicide. He then showed no emotion and said that there was no point to live and that all the closest people to him were dead. I started crying and hold him, telling him that everyone I was close to had died too (without letting him know I had killed them) and that I need him. I continued to crying and repeat my self pity until I woke up.
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