I dreamt that my mother past away and I was attending her funeral or wake. People where around pittying me for my loss. Then I was alone with the grief and realized that I was just at the funeral for my mother and I tried to cry or scream and couldn't. It seemed forced but i was in so much pain, I knew I would feel better if I could just sob and cry until I was tired but I couldn't. When I woke up I had this overwhelming anxiety that my mother will one day die and felt that my world is now forever different. I've always known she would die, but when I woke up I immediately thought that I couldn't cope with this realization. I thought of how I could continue normal day to day with the knowledge the my mother will one day not be with me.
(background info: I moved to a different state as my mother a year ago and since I have left she has had two operations and was recently diagnosed with Breast Cancer. I've been with her through these operations and I have good handle on her diagnosis and have positive that she'll be just fine. I'm not even a little worried that she won't survive this. We are extremely close and she recently retired and wants to live near me but these unfortunate medical issues make it impossible for her to leave her team of doctors now. She will be coming soon though) What do you think!
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