I had my heart broken 2 years ago (sigh, I know) by a guy who I really thought could be the one. He made me feel things I've never felt before, but I had my doubts. It was a very confusing time for me; I made some mistakes and hurt him. However, when a few months went by without him in my life, I began missing him. I went out with him and his friends (he invited me) but to my surprise, he brought another girl there. Turns out she was his date. He pretty much ignored me for the night and I was by myself for most of the time. Pretty tacky and immature, especially since he had invited me; I feel like his intention was to make me feel bad, after having his ego bruised. Still, finally seeing him with someone else was the clincher. I finally came around and told him I still had feelings for him, he said that he had moved on. Then he said some very insensitive, hurtful things and said that "he had done nothing wrong."
If he loved me as much as he made it seem, I really feel that he would have come back to me (especially since he barely knew this new girl). I feel that his whole pursuit of me was just a desperate act, and that he turned out to be just a guy frantically looking for a girlfriend, any girl. I feel that I wasn't as special (to him) as he made me feel.
I have never been so hurt and I feel very betrayed. I keep having dreams about this guy and his current girlfriend. It's a serious relationship (this was what he always wanted, even with me) and they are getting engaged soon.
My life and dating situation has not really changed since this incident. I am still single, but am ready (and have been for a while, frankly) to get involved with someone else and hopefully have something much greater than I did with THIS guy. still, until then, i have to keep hearing about/seeing this guy with someone else-- happy, fulfilled, and at peace. he has told his gf about what happened with me and her behavior toward me has been decidedly awkward/negative. I find that unfair-- I certainly have a right to feel uncomfortable too.
Anyway, I keep having dreams about the things I dread. Running into him and her, seeing him happy with her, seeing her happy with him, hearing about how awesomely things are going for this jackass, etc.
It sucks. And the fact that it shows up in my dreams tells me how deeply affected I am by all this. I can't escape the ****** feeling. I can only hope that things will change once I am happier with someone else.
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