let me start by saying that I have always been on the fence about what I believe when it comes to the existence of ghosts and good/evil spirits, god, etc. if you asked me in public, i would deny it, but ive always felt (wheather i was convinced of it or not) that such things do indeed exist. I was recently prompted to do some research on a reoccoring dream that ive had close to a dozen times (maybe more) in the last 5 years after two seperate events peaked my interest. the 1st being that my mom recently went to a psycic medium, who told her things that made me weak when I heard them on tape. Weather or not i was ever convinced of ghosts and spirits before, I was ALWAYS dead against the idea of a "psycic". I thought they were top drawer scam artists that prey on weak minded folks in search of something out of reach...that is until I heard these tapes...this woman brought up things NO ONE could ever have known. There was nothing said about me that was in any way damning or that i was in any sort of "spiritual" danger, but it definitely left me with a different point of veiw. The 2nd thing that sparked my interest (and dont laugh) was seeing the movie "Insidious". If you havent seen it, its about this kid who is able to step out of his physical body when he sleeps and travel throught the astral (?) dimension. He wanders off too far and becomes "lost" in this astral dimension, rendering his physical body comatose. Meanwhile, evil sprits and demons enter our world in an attempt to secure his physical form with the intent of doing harm unto others. Now, that may ALL be a little far fetched, but when i read the description of the girls dream involvong the "shadow man", I nearly **** a brick because its uncannily similar to the ones i have had over the years. Although i cant remember a lot of the specifcs or particular settings of the dreams, there is always 2 or 3 things in common with every one. A "normal" dream will always take an ominous turn. It will often turn dark and ill feel the presence of this dark sillouhette of what seems like a man. I can never see any definite features, but there is always a man like figure. And its never in contrast to a bright back ground. Im always struggling to make this thing out because its like im seeing a shaddow within the darkness (if that makes any sence). im always scared in my dream when i see this thing, but i always recognize the fact that ive seen it before. I would become parylized with fear, unable to move or speak...but only for the 1st 3 or 4 encounters. after that i started to challenge this presence in my dreams (almost agknowledging that I was aware that i was asleep within the dream). I will walk toward it and demand that it tell me what it wants, then just as i would get close enough to engage it, my body becomes flooded with fear and panic and I wake up breathing hysterically. I will also often find myself parylized in my dreams, unable to move or speak... but without this dark presence. Even though i feel like im awake, i know that im sleeping. Ill try really hard to move my body enough that the physical twitch wakes me up...but that aside, I NEED TO KNOW WHAT THIS DARK FIGURE WANTS!!! why me??? Ill let you know that im 2 years clean of a nasty heroine addiction. It tore my life apart in many ways. Im left with a lot of supressed anger and residual guilt. I have read that these types of deep emotions can manifest themselves in dreams, but for some reason i dont think this is the case. Also, these dreams of the dark figure go back before i was an addict. please tell me what yo know of my story and perhaps shed some insight as to why it would happen to me and how i can get rid of it for good. Im a good person with a kind heart and im trying to move on with my life...but honestly, this scares the **** out of me!!!!
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