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So the dream starts in like a school gym, but it is supposed to be a hospital. I am sitting on hospital bed, pushing out a baby! I remember seeing myself delierving the baby, but I had no belly. I did not know I was pregnant. The doctors delievered the baby, and turned right away and took him. My dream skipped forward a couple days and I am walking back into the gym, that is supposed to be a hospital, and i find my mom holding my child. She hands him to me. I could feel my heart fill up with joy and unconditional love. I look at him for the first time, and he is absolutely beautiful! I hold him close and look back at him. This time, his bright blue eyes are messed up. One stares right back at me while the other flops around like googley eye. Every now and again through out my dream, the one good eye would go cross eyed, but then I would look at him again and it was just perfect looking straight back at me, but the other eye is always messed up. When I see his eyes, I start to cry myself. I hold him so close to me and whisper to him that I would love him no matter what. He was everything to me. So my dream goes on, I guess I start living my normal life with a new baby. Family and friends are around, but I wouldn't let anyone hold him besides my mom. I let the father of the baby hold him once but after that, he wasn't in the dream at all. I also never left the "gym" while I was living my life. I remember having my baby in the car seat. I set him down for a second and walked maybe 5 foot away, but he was still in plane view. But I kept looking at him, like since I wasn't RIGHT next to him he was going to choke and die or someone was going to take him. I remember feeling like I was a bad parent because I didn't have him right there next to me. The dream went on, still in the gym. I am holding my baby and finally decided to name him Cooper (a name i have never even thought of). I remember holding him up infront of me and baby talking him and he was laughing and smiling, with his one crazy eye rolling around. Then I was holding him next to me and I am talking to my mom. I look back down at him and all of a sudden he is so small! I asked my mom what just happened to him! She looks at me like I am crazy and says, "Hunny, he's a dwarf. He is not going to get much bigger." i remembered started crying again. I wanted my baby to be perfect. I felt like I brought on the bad things that have already happened to him, his eyes and being small. But i felt in my heart the love for him. I remember kissing his head and telling him I will never stop loving you. And that was it.
The night I had the dream, I was sleeping like a rock all night, until then. I also don't know if I can get pregnant. I get cyst inside my ovaries that don't pop, so I am taking the 3 month birth control pill and I never let myself have a period on doctors orders. I have missed a view pills in the last 2 months. Normally when i would miss them before, my remaining ovary would really start to hurt because a cyst would start to form. It would then take months of consistently taking the pill to get it to go away. So me being 20 years old, and already not knowing if I can have kids, for some reason I always think I am pregnant. Every single month I think that, even though in my heart I know I am not and I always tell myself that. It is a very scary thing, because ever since I was little I have wanted nothing more than to have my own family. So for obvious reasons, this dream startled me. I do have fears that if by some miracle I do get pregnant that my baby will be deformed. The reason I get cysts is my body is not releasing the egg and the sack holding it gets bigger and bigger. So I am afraid that if I get pregnant, what if it was one of the eggs and should have been released months ago! i don't know how that works! I did read on the symbolizm of the "baby". Me and my boyfriend of 4 years were in a big fight. So I mean the baby symbol in the dream makes sense along that line. I just don't know about this. I would really like to get someone elses opinion. The main things in the dream was me not having a belly, the blue weird eye and the one normal eye, but sometimes going cross eyed, naming him Cooper, the baby smiling and laughing, and then becoming a dwarf. those are the main things that are bothering me! Shoot, if you even want to email me what you think you can! my email is email@example.com! Thanks!
|Dream Symbols from our Dream Dictionary:||blue eyes | car seat | couple days | doctors | family and friends | good eye | having my baby | heart | living my life | mom|
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