I Think Some Men Have Really Bad Pick Up Lines Stories of Experiences

So I am seeing what is out there, man wise, and it is not looking good. Don't get me wrong, there are some nice ones out there, but they are way out numbered by the jack holes. For instance, take this one guy, John (and that IS his...

1) I've got Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?

2) I heard milk was good for you but, DAMN! How much did you drink?

3) Hey baby. Wanna play house? You be the door and I'll slam you.

4) Do you have a Bandaid? I cut my knee...

We have all heard our share, here's a few of the worst (at least in my opinion):
1. "Are your parents beavers cause DAMMMM!"
2. "Let's make like a candle and go out."
3. "How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice, hi my...

Forget all these rubbish men you've been out with. or I expect you've been treated really badly by men.
My reply it "No, I was happily married. My husband died. So what are you going on about"?
Their answer is "well you know what | mean...

Hey, got 10 minutes?

Such lines can be invaluable when there is an urgent need to divert attention from something else.

Once upon a time, I was a single guy in Chicago. I had a decent job, a nice apartment, and a group of good friends that liked to hang out at the bar a few blocks from my place. We were there most nights, and try as I might, I never...

1. If you and I were squirrels, could I busta nut in your hole?
2. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.
3. If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning.
4.  How do you like...

If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.

I once had a drunk guy at a bar tell me he wanted to lick my legs like a puppy dog. Gross.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I like spaghetti, Let's go fuck. 
Does this rag smell funny to you? 
Hey now, let's not turn this rape into a murder.

some of thse were asked to me and some were asked to my friends and they were funny so im sharing them
Do You sleep On Your Stomach?" When you answer no, they respond, "Well, can I?"

"Are your legs tired? Because...

Here's the worst pick up line I ever received:
"So... I like your boobs. Wanna go out?"
Um. No. 

So, I having been single for about a year and half now. I thought it was time to step up my game and hit the social scene with my friends, which i have been doing for the past 2 months.
This usually involves a few pub crawls in my...

"If I followed you home...would you keep me?"
"I lost my number...can I borrow yours?"
"Am I cute enough yet? or do you need more drinks?"
"You know what would look great on you? Me"
"All...

I've been on the receiving of many lame pick up lines. I don't actually mind if someone asked me my sign cause i'm into astrology too. But last week i was in the city and walked past McDonalds and there was some creepy dude that seemed...

The worst ever is when guys ask me, "What's your sign?" And I tell them, thinking that maybe they're into astrology also, "I'm Scorpio." And then the next thing is, them asking how well does Scorpio and their sign...

I was in the Union Station bookstore killing some time before going home after work one day.  This guy looking at some books next to me, out of the blue, says, "So uhh..do you work around here?" and I say I just got off...

They call me "coffee",  I grind so fine.
 
I actually laughed when a guy said that to me once.  Then of course he hung around all night thinking he was 'in'.  It didn't go anywhere, but he was funny to...

Just an hour or 2 ago I was riding home from work on my bike, when I met this guy riding the opposite direction who stared at my(not special and not significantly large) breasts, than at my face and said "Hello beautiful, feel like...

for years a friend of ours used the line... "oh wow that dress is very becoming...you know if i were on you i'd be cumming too"... sadly i hate to report that it often got him a good laugh and a phone number...
to each their...