I Abuse Myself

For those of us who can't forget or forgive. 83 People

    What I Do

    In any way possible, physical or mentaly. I have hitted, cut and did the impossible to alterate my heartburn just to stop my mental pain. Even tried to kill myself.... While mentaly I am always critizicing myself when I fight with my sister or am suffering for someone else. I...
    AngelsReflection AngelsReflection
    18-21, F
    Dec 31, 2009

    ..... I always let people take advantage of me

    and after I feel horrible about it...
    deleted deleted
    Jul 19, 2015

    I often feel abused. I went online

    and took an abuse test. It was obviously for couples, but I scored really high and likely of being abused. I scream at myself, punish myself, blame myself, or physically harm myself just like an abuser would, but its hard to explain to people that I feel like I am being abused...
    innerself000 innerself000
    18-21, F
    Oct 16, 2014

    Off The Wagon And Into The Road...

    I've started again, but at least its not because of him. I'm not snapping back, or really pointing out how unfair things are- I hold everything in and just smile. I was Smiling when I did it too. Just made myself comfortable and got to it. I don't feel bad, I don't feel happy...
    yake25 yake25
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 18, 2013

    If there is something I do exceptionally well,

    it is totally neglecting my health in every way. It's abuse, and at that, I am a bit of a humdinger. I don't take care of myself. I'm not entirely sure if I am unable to, or merely don't want to. Probably both. I'm not overweight yet, but my eating habits are atrociously...
    Dreambrother Dreambrother
    18-21, F
    Feb 11, 2015

    You're The Strongest One Here

    Browsing through my thoughts. Tears start to fall You're fading away I get scared. It hurts. I get angry. And so, I slap and puch myself in the face. Scratch my face till I see blood. I need more. So I find my precious razor My old friend. It stains, but it feels good. When it's...
    xLoveYoux xLoveYoux
    Oct 30, 2011

    I miss cutting so much right now.

    .. of course, I have no real reason why I shouldn't get back to it since my best friend made it pretty clear on the 13th that our friendship is over - I just don't like the idea of throwing away 7 years of being clean... but I hurt so much right now.
    LoneSouls LoneSouls
    31-35, F
    7 Responses Feb 14, 2015

    This Girl

    there is this girl with low self esteem. she cuts herself to get away from the pain. if that makes any sense at all. she loves her family and friends and thats the only thing keeping her alive. but one by one she is losing friends bc of her differences and losing love and respect...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Aug 5, 2011

    Well it's been two years

    since I've been on here.. :) it brings back lots of memories! But guess what I've been clean since March of 2012.. I still have the urge to do it but I'm not in a abusive relationship any more and I found someone that treats me amazing :)
    cassandrah101 cassandrah101
    18-21, F
    Feb 17, 2015

    Pain Is Love

    I abuse myself you can say. I punch myself, hit myself with a belt, sometimes cut. I burn myself, bite myself, cry  myself to sleep. I talk to myself at night and i say violent things on what i wish i can do to myself I let people take advantage of me and abuse me i...
    Ghostette Ghostette
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jun 24, 2010

    It's not that I think you don't love me.

    It's the fact that I don't love myself and I make myself think that no one can love me by making impossible connections possible in my mind. I make it so real in my head that I successfully convince myself that no one loves me. Even though it's not true.
    jackjack600 jackjack600
    22-25, F
    Mar 2, 2015

    Used To It

    my mom did it before to me so i honestly do not see why people care if i hurt myself the way that i do i mean come on im already used to it
    bellamajors bellamajors
    13-15, F
    3 Responses Mar 30, 2012

    I talk to myself every now

    and then when I'm alone. 90% of the time, I'm not saying nice things. "I'm a ******* idiot." "You're worthless." "Just kill yourself." "You're never going to be worth anything." It's one thing to hear that stuff come out of someone else mouth. But, when it dawns on you you're...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Oct 1, 2014

    Emotional abuse mainly.

    I have physically abused myself in the past (drinking, drugs, fighting and cutting), but none of it comes anywhere near as bad as the damage I do emotionally. I was tormented and bullied as a child, and beaten and abused by my father. I had nowhere to go to feel to feel safe...
    IamMimic IamMimic
    70+, M
    Feb 11, 2014

    I Tried To Tell Him No! :'(

    Once youve been forced its hard to even live with yourselve. I feel so disgusting and used....the night i tried to talk to him about it he just said whatever and didnt care...so i cut myself....it wasnt the first time ive cut myself.....but it was the worst! I put an "x" on my...
    cassandrah101 cassandrah101
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Sep 4, 2012

    Not Anymore...

    I've cut recently. My boyfriend and one of my best friends were very upset and concerned for me. I was doing so well, and then something happened that I couldn't handle and I resorted to old habits... I'm trying to stop because it hurts the people I love. Even when I hide it...
    yake25 yake25
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jul 1, 2012

    All dressed up and no one to use me,

    so it's out with the gel and a nice fat candle and up it goes oh what pleasure but not the same as the real thing
    Johnina Johnina
    70+, M
    Jul 23, 2014
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