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I Abused Pills

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 136 People

    Last night I felt hopeless I took it without

    thinking My body went numb And I continued I felt heavy... I cried endlessly I laid on my bed And swallowed the last in the container Listening to music I felt paralyzed I couldn't move The pain was gone More tears ran down my cheek I smiled Then my phone ringed I...
    kpoppanda124 kpoppanda124 16-17, F Jul 1, 2014

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    Long Time Ago!!!! I was 16

    when all this started..... me and my friends started taking 'relaxin' pills. these pills would relax all the muscels in the body and bring us in a new zone...we used to take 1 pill a day in the start and eventualy we took it as a candy without water..... we used to bear the bad...
    Pseudo69isback Pseudo69isback 31-35, M Nov 11, 2014

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    OMG Always

    Known for it... my cure all for life I guess. No I'm not out buying them on the black market but the thought of heading to Mexico does appeal to me. I just self medicate when need be. When I'm up all is well and no need... well unless I'm too up and uphoric and then take a small...
    mysplitpersonality mysplitpersonality 36-40, F 1 Response Dec 2, 2008

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    Every Night

    I would take on average anywhere from 5-10 tylenols along with a few sleeping pills. This all started when I was 12 until I was about 16. My Mom kept all the pills in her bedroom above her bed. I would go in randomly complaining of a headache or sick stomach. She would usually...
    Aleighsha Aleighsha 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 8, 2010

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    I was really depressed

    and sad that day. When I got home I took 10 pills, I don't know what I was trying to accomplish I just knew I was tired of life. Anyway a couple hours after I took the the pills I was really scared I was going to die. They were sleeping pills so I was scared to go to sleep...
    LikeAPrayer LikeAPrayer 18-21, F Jul 29, 2014

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    Once, Never Again

    I'll admit to doing it once, when very low. Luckily didn't take enough to be sick, just a good sleep. I'll never do it again, I count my lucky stars.
    lazycrazybasket lazycrazybasket 46-50, M Feb 4, 2012

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    I Still Do...

    abuse pills. It numbs the pain of having to live life. It makes me forget whats going on. It helps me shut my mind off otherwise I won't sleep for days because I have so many things eating away at me. You can call me what you'd like but this is how I deal. People always say do...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 31, 2011

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    Back To Square Zero

    This is going to sound stupid maybe, but I got so upset that I couldn't go to the fireworks show here. I love fireworks. It was too far though and I would have felt silly being all alone. I got more and more depressed and started crying. I took two Benadryl, a Klonopin, two...
    deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Jul 5, 2011

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    JalenFrankie616 JalenFrankie616 13-15, F 1 Response 4 days ago

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    beautifuldisaster0 beautifuldisaster0 26-30, F Dec 30, 2013

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    Used Them Until Near Death

    Two years ago I swallowed about 20 depression pills. I almost died from an overdose because of this. I've learned a lot from that mistake. Never again will I abuse pills like I did. It is so dangerous and I really didn't think at all when I took them. It feels good when you take...
    iloveedward iloveedward 18-21, F Nov 2, 2009

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    I Still Kind Of Do....

    I take over the counter sleeping pills, as if they are candy or something like that, or at least that is what I have been told. Since I don't have any health insurance, I have to relay on over-the-counter pills, to help me sleep, and because I have to do that, it takes more than...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Nov 10, 2010

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    I Did

    A long time ago... When I was in one of my experimenting phases... One of the stupidest things I have done... I have od'd more then ten times because of pills... But I never stop... Because well I was an idiot... I stop abusing pills when I was 14 because I thought I found better...
    XLunaXLovegoodX XLunaXLovegoodX 22-25, F Jul 17, 2008

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    Because I Am a Self Destructive Eejit

    I have abused pills for a variety of reasons from bulimia to suicide attempts from being very impatient and deciding to keep eating painkillers until the pain stopped rather than giving them time to work.  So the moral of this story - Don't, it is not big and it is not...
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 7, 2009

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    I Used To

    ok i will admit this. i used to be addicted to sleeping pills. It started after i got kicked out of high school. I had real trouble sleeping back then. i would stay up fro over a day and sleep half a day. i would stay up all night walking around town then sleep when the day came...
    CaptainJackass CaptainJackass 22-25, M 4 Responses Dec 1, 2010

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    I'm Addicted!

    Yes, i've abused pills since i was 13. On and off until 2 years ago that it got so out of control> i was taking more than 12 pills a day < 2 bottles wouldn't last a week. So 15+ months ago i kicked it! i'm in recovery now and i know for a fact that if i start to take...
    andreinac13 andreinac13 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 6, 2008

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    Not Anymore Though!

    Although I would if I could (as sad as that is)... It's just not within my means right now.  I live in a new state and wouldn't even know where to begin.  They were so readily available to me where I was from.  Everything... OC's (80's), Loratabs, Xany's, percs...
    BlueWhaleMeatMcFacer BlueWhaleMeatMcFacer 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 4, 2008

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    Maybe a Lifetime Ago

    I used to abuse pills almost every day.  I have been sober for a year and I just got off probation.  Already people want me to do them again.  The high i got from pills was unreal and that is always in the back of my mind.  I don't want to use pills again even...
    Locogirrl Locogirrl 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 9, 2009

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    SheIsHealing SheIsHealing 22-25, F 1 Response Dec 1, 2014

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    Still Do Sometimes

    I like taking a bit more klonopin than what is prescribed to me because I just need something to chill me out. I get so anxious. Only bad thing is- it chills me out but I get so tired and I knock out.  Years before, I used to abuse painkillers. I would take at least a...
    nitid nitid 16-17, F Dec 1, 2010

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    I use pills to get me high

    for like the past two weeks on the weekends and I feel terrible about doing that. I don't want to get my boyfriend mad at me and ugh I need to stop. I love him to much to destroy this relationship cause of me being an idiot
    BooBear99 BooBear99 16-17, F 1 Response Mar 18

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    Oh Yes.. A Lot

    Aqutic, Percaset, oxycodone serequill, all Years ago. The worse was probablyy when my best friend had saved up all of her medication, for a few months... we both just downed probably over 60 each...
    xScreamOfTheButterflyx xScreamOfTheButterflyx 22-25, F 9 Responses Nov 2, 2009

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    To Sleep

    I guess I was getting a bit desperate. I didn't sleep well, on most of the nights not at all, and I still had to study as hard as possible five days a week. I wonder if I had gotten an actual sleeping medication if I asked for it? Maybe, maybe not. I live in a small town, where...
    Fearofsilence Fearofsilence 18-21, F Aug 11, 2010

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    Tyanol Was My Best Friend

    Living with my mother I had a dependency on sleeping pills and tyanol 3's, They numbed all the pain away. But with this dependancy I became ill..all I can say now is that I steer clear of tyanol.
    Canadianpunchingbag Canadianpunchingbag 18-21, F Sep 27, 2008

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    Everthin

    ive abused pills of all sorts bout everythin u could think off painkillers anti-inflammatories sleeepin tablets anti psychotics blood pressure tablets ant acid tablets everthin u could think of i have abused and i aint gonna stop cause it keeps me alive and saves me...
    ccdo ccdo 22-25, F Nov 18, 2009

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    Far, Far Away......

    I have abused these and more...I really like the feeling I get with painkillers. But, I tend to get hooked on them really quickly...I find myself taking doses more frequently, and when they're gone, the crash is horrid!!!  I need to stay far, far away from all painkillers...
    lonesurvivor lonesurvivor 51-55, F 3 Responses Nov 3, 2009

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    Used to have a friend

    who could get her hands on anything. Ambien, Xanax, Valium, barbs, and Vicodin are a small portion of what we would take. Pretty stupid now that I reflect back because there was no point in taking all that crap. I was one crazy kid.
    JessicaTacos JessicaTacos 18-21, F Dec 24, 2014

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    Long Time Ago!!!!

    I was 16 when all this started..... me and my friends started taking 'relaxin' pills. these pills would relax all the muscels in the body and bring us in a new zone...we used to take 1 pill a day in the start and eventualy we took it as a candy without water..... we used to bear...
    Pseudo69 Pseudo69 26-30, M 1 Response Sep 20, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    I've been sexually abused by my father since I was a little girl, around 9. Whenever my mom travelled for work, which was often, he would come to me and touch me, kiss me, force me...
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    I was abused by my father countless of times already. Just lateky, he abused me again. Just because I forgot to get uniform outside, I left it there overnight. I did not even know...
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    I found out at age 29 that this man who molested, belittled, sexually abused, emotional abused, and who still lives in my deceased mother's home wasn't my real father....my mother...
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    Thinking about death and life every night. side by side life and death. My insomnia is really horrible. I stop taking meds at this moment,and i've been taking counseling. sorry i...
    Juri0902 Juri0902 31-35, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    The best one for me is to snort my ADHD pills. Crush them and snort.
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    I'm taking diet pills twice a day to help me lose weight so I can try and keep my eye sight and I also hate the way I look.
    QueenB14 QueenB14 22-25, F Mar 19

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    My step dad used to try and 'toughen me up' when he realised I just wasn't like that he started mentally abusing me, he would say I was a girl for not liking fighting and would...
    LeighUK LeighUK 41-45, M 2 Responses Mar 1

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    I was sexually abused by my uncle at the age of 5 till 11.... Im 17 now and i finally went to the police it was the best decision i ever made, please if this has happend to you i...
    helpmeplease1973 helpmeplease1973 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 1

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    Oh boo hoo I was molested anal made to dress in little girls clothing all this people wringing about being abused should get over themselves i was 10 and I was forced to wear...
    subsissy1989 subsissy1989 26-30, M 5 Responses Mar 6

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    I didn't finish school..i remember growing up with my mother nagging my father about money..she always beat us if she ran out of money..she would tell us to work for ourselves at...
    lezia88 lezia88 26-30, F Mar 9

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    The more I think about it the more disgusted I am. My dad sexually abused me for years and I didn't know it. I've told one other person my entire life. If your reading this your...
    XsOfTheSoul XsOfTheSoul 18-21, F 5 Responses Mar 12

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    Sometimes it's hard to get my bestie to understand where I'm coming from, because she's never really had to deal with being sexually harassed and (thank goodness) she's never been...
    luna1912 luna1912 18-21, F Mar 20

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    A message to my Ex I hate you, I love you You broke me You killed me You ruined my life You hurt me in so many different ways You abused me for 1 full year You drained what ever...
    LeahLovee LeahLovee 16-17, F 2 Responses Mar 22

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    It's taken me a few years to understand what exactly was happening but when I finally did because of this cop that came to talk to my class about all sorts of stuff, sexual abuse...
    disparateyouth disparateyouth 13-15, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    i recently started seeing a therapist to deal with some things from my childhood. i worked so hard to be a functioning person that i have repressed and suppressed many of my...
    paris348 paris348 22-25, F 5 days ago