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I Always Fall For People Who Are Unavailable Or Don't Like Me

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 389 People

    Flirting With Disaster

    Perhaps Morrisey said it best, "I want the one I can't have, and it's driving me mad. It's all over, all over, all over, all over my face.." He's unavailable in every sense of the word (maybe that's part of what draws me to him?). Hundreds of miles away and married with a family...
    PollySyllabacus PollySyllabacus 22-25, F 5 Responses Dec 28, 2012

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    My Curse

    As a lesbian among straight girls,could it be any other way?
    PantherShadow PantherShadow 13-15, F Oct 12, 2009

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    Stalker Boyfriend

    I dated a guy who was obsessed with and stalking his ex-girlfriend.  He was constantly distracted and hardly appreciated me, sometimes even unfavorably comparing me to her.  When I finally gave him an ultimatum, stalking her or being my friend, he chose to continue...
    trucktippingover trucktippingover 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 28, 2010

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    It's definitely more

    so the unavailable than don't like me. In this story I'm going to talk about several different guys. I'll mention their name at the beginning of each story. The first story is a story about Ash. Ash was the friend of a distant friend. He just walked up to me one day and asked...
    cemarie128 cemarie128 18-21, F Apr 19, 2014

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    ....and I Am In The Situation Now

    Have been for 5 years.  Same woman.  What the eff is wrong with me?  I left a 23 year relationship 5 years ago, because I fell in love again "with someone unavailable"....someone who loves me as a friend, and once upon a time she almost left her relationship for me.  Yeah, I...
    Icarus2006 Icarus2006 51-55, F 3 Responses Jul 13, 2011

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    Everything I Desire Is Hurting Me.

    I have had it up to here. I will no longer pursue, or even peruse, the impossible.
    TheRealWoman TheRealWoman 31-35, F 9 Responses Oct 11, 2009

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    No Good Explanation

    I had loving parents, didn't have a distant dad, am pretty and confident.  But I tend to go after guys who are not available, either because they live in another country or they report to me that they have a long-distant, long-term girlfriend.  In either case, they're...
    Startnew Startnew 46-50, F Oct 11, 2009

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    To Be Expected...

    "Hi I'm ____, nice to meet you!" Are you married? Check. Do you have a girlfriend? Check. Are you a few hundred to a few thousand miles away from me? Check. Do you only like me as a friend or friend w/ benifts? Check. The Point: Why ask if I know at least one of the answers...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe 22-25 3 Responses Mar 9, 2011

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    The Road Not Taken

    I've known her since high school. Not the thinnest (might be classified as big boned), not the prettiest (her two sisters got the looks - seriously), but she's the most amazing woman I know. She's always had this energy, this glow, about her that made me want to be with her...
    scarsmart scarsmart 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    Is It A Result Of Being Unavailable Myself?

    I am attracted to emotionaly unavailable people, and lately I started to think why. Was is just bad luck to run in to them or was it me. I googled it and a lot of articals are saying that you fall for this kind of people because actually you are unavailable too. I don't know. I...
    notnownotever notnownotever 18-21, F Jul 2, 2013

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    I'm In Love With A Married Guy

    I truly, hopelessly, unconditionally  love a married guy. What should I do? I know that I can never have him but I can't stay without him. :( ... I always end up with someone whom I can never have for myself :'(
    rainbow82 rainbow82 26-30, F 11 Responses Dec 13, 2010

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    What Motivates You To Seek The Unavailable

    Ok, ladies, As I prepare to jump into a hornets nest let me say this: Some women don't necessarily want to be in love they just love to be wanted. The challenge to obtain the unattainable or the idea of being picked over the other women is motivating in itself. I am not saying...
    finity finity 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 15, 2012

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    FreeNbreezy FreeNbreezy 41-45, F Feb 4, 2014

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    C-note

    Story of my life...I've gone through so much pain and trouble because of this girl. But I've also learned a lot about myself and life in general. First of all I'm definitely a shy guy. It's not in my nature to go out partying and/or being the life of the party. Now I'm not...
    GooderThanB4 GooderThanB4 26-30, M May 3, 2012

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    Has anyone sorted out

    why they do this? I have been mulling over my so-called love life, of late (couple years), and this seems to be a pattern with me. They're married (and I won't cross that line), they live too far from me for it to be a reality. Other reasons as well. Or is it possible that...
    idonotwantausername1024 idonotwantausername1024 36-40, F Mar 9, 2014

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    Loving Unavailable People

    All my life, and I'm 49 now, I've fallen in love with person after person who doesn't return my affections ... I mean, everybody has these experiences, but mine are more like fantasy/obsessions. I had these obsessions even when I was married. My spouse and I were friends but...
    oskiesmom oskiesmom 46-50 7 Responses Jan 22, 2009

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    They're either married,

    emotionally unavailable or aren't interested in me because of their sexual orientation. It's like I subconsciously scope out the people in a room who are completely unavailable.
    beautyofuncertainty beautyofuncertainty 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 19, 2014

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    He's Confused And He Confused Me Too.

    I knew him since last 5 years but fell for him a few months back. I told him all this and he said that he isn't interested. Still, we used to converse frequently as friends. He often used to give me those intense looks but when I asked him he said that no I like someone else. He...
    anushka98 anushka98 16-17, F Nov 21, 2013

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    I Too, Have Noticed This Pattern In My Life

    I have began to realize that ever since my second divorce (yep, I sure can pick 'em) that I have fallen for two men that are unavailable to me. A few years ago, it was a much, much older man. He was single, no kids, but he was in his 50s while I was 27. I have no idea why I...
    sweetie8403 sweetie8403 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 3, 2013

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    Story Of My Life For Real

    I am so sick of it.Every single time I meet a guy I really like, he's unavailable somehow. Recently I started talking to a great guy who (so far) seems like exactly what I am looking for. He's intelligent beyond belief, emotionally sensitive, kind, easy to talk to, cute, and...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 8, 2013

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    I don't know how to feel.

    Is it obsession or something real when you can't think about anyone else but this one person, when your day is not fulfilled until you've seen them, spoken with them, laughed at a silly passing joke? Is it something my mind has concocted to pass the time, something to strive for...
    AxDisorientedxMind AxDisorientedxMind 22-25, F May 31, 2014

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    So Frustrating

    Ive been in so  many wonderful relationships, that I feel we have a connection, an understanding of each other...can say anything and have a great comfort zone where you feel so excepted.  And everytime something happens or comes up where they have to or want to leave the state...
    jojo31 jojo31 31-35, F Aug 31, 2011

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    I have this habit of falling

    for charismatic guys who consider everyone they meet a friend. What usually happens is that they're nice to me (because they're nice to everyone, not because they have special feelings for me), I fall for them, and I get my heart broken. I'm so used to people ignoring me due to...
    RobinDaggers RobinDaggers 26-30, F 1 Response Feb 17, 2014

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    I've spent years analyzing my ****** love life

    and came to see a pattern in it - and it could not be more obvious: I FALL FOR PEOPLE I CAN'T HAVE (but I'm unsure why) I think I've explored almost all the possible cases of unavailability now, followed by heartache and/or rejection. But let's not get ahead of myself... It...
    MissMojo MissMojo 22-25, F Jan 6, 2014

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    Emotionally Unavailable

    Yup, I can sure pick them.  I married someone who was emotionally unavailable. I fell in love with a guy who was emotionally unavailable.I recently dated someone who was emotionally unavailable.None of these men hate me.  Two of them loved me.  The other guy liked me. Now I...
    Mahal1023 Mahal1023 46-50, F 4 Responses Sep 9, 2011

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    Everyone That I Have A Crush On Is Unavailable :(

    1st I develop a crush on a guy named Brennen and he's in a really committed with an amazing girl and even though it sucks for me, I'm really happy for them! They look perfect together Now I have two crushes; one on my straight best friend, Avneet and the other one is on my...
    energizerbunnay energizerbunnay 18-21, F 4 Responses Sep 25, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    If your asking for my opinion and you don't like when I said you have to deal with it, I don't care.
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    But that does not mean I don't support them. or respect them. These days there are a number of police here in America (U.S.) that have gotten out of hand. When a man is running...
    AceWarbringer AceWarbringer 31-35, M Apr 13

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    I think vulnerability is a mistake most of the time for me. I don't like being vulnerable and allowing others to know how I think and feel. It's a hard enough time getting people...
    Allforaview Allforaview 18-21, F Apr 4

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    I constantly have dreams of going to the dentist and all my teeth fall out. I don't like people all up in my grill, or my mouth.
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell 16-17, T 1 Response Mar 27

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    I want to say this: I Like People Who Can Handle Different Opinions What Being Open Minded Is Really About I want to post my thoughts in this group here hoping that there is...
    Soniador1963 Soniador1963 51-55, M 1 Response Mar 28

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    I really don't like children. When I look at Babies-I have ZERO feelings. I may even find them ugly. I do not have any children and know I may regret it one day..but just the...
    fijifranny fijifranny 13-15, F Apr 12

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    I do miss some people.. But, perhaps rather than the people, I miss the memories. And it sucks, knowing that I can't make more with those people. Even if I could, it wouldn't feel...
    RhinosaurusRex RhinosaurusRex 18-21, F 5 Responses Apr 10

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    She's always yelling and nagging at me. I'm the only one out of my brother and sister that she takes stuff out on. Everything I do is under a microscope and she's constantly making...
    anonymous1634 anonymous1634 22-25, F 1 day ago

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    I put others needs in front of mine. I don't like seeing people who are hurt. So I try to help as much as I can.
    randomart4lives randomart4lives 13-15, F 2 Responses Apr 9

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    There is a girl named Angelina at my school, she is spoiled rich and mean. My friends say that shes jealous of me or something but either way she treats others like trash. Not just...
    SilverPhoenix11 SilverPhoenix11 13-15, F 1 Response Apr 13

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    I can't stop thinking about something that just happened. One of our neighbors placed a note on one of our cars that was parked on the street. They didn't sign their name but...
    Petiteblonde Petiteblonde 18-21, F 3 Responses 5 days ago

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    This is the generation I live in. Instead of crying in front of friends and family I am crying behind a computer screen hoping to get sympathy from strangers. I don't like my life...
    secretheartpanda secretheartpanda 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 1

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    For a super shy guy like me i really respect people who aren't afraid to share their feeling with the world
    Cubeball Cubeball 18-21, M 3 Responses Apr 9

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    if you don't like what i bring to the table, I'm not afraid to eat alone.
    CallmeHopelessNotRomantic CallmeHopelessNotRomantic 36-40, F Apr 16

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    I like people who are open minded open to new ideas and have the ability to see things from different perspectives
    philabe90 philabe90 22-25, M 2 Responses Apr 17

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    A dear friend of mine died about a month ago and I can't stop thinking of him and grieving for him. There are support groups for people who lose children or spouses, but not...
    Laleetwin Laleetwin 41-45, F 3 Responses 1 day ago

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    I was sitting in the living room with my mom last night and we ended up on the subject of children. I mentioned that I don't really like kids and she rebutted with you only like...
    TheKristaJo TheKristaJo 22-25, F 2 Responses Apr 3

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    I don't like to talk about my feelings, and instead I let everything pent up and stress me out and make me upset. I've tried to use this site as a way to talk about my feelings and...
    Becky555 Becky555 18-21, F 1 day ago