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I Always Fall For People Who Are Unavailable Or Don't Like Me

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 370 People

    Has anyone sorted out

    why they do this? I have been mulling over my so-called love life, of late (couple years), and this seems to be a pattern with me. They're married (and I won't cross that line), they live too far from me for it to be a reality. Other reasons as well. Or is it possible that...
    idonotwantausername1024 idonotwantausername1024 36-40, F Mar 9

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    Stalker Boyfriend

    I dated a guy who was obsessed with and stalking his ex-girlfriend.  He was constantly distracted and hardly appreciated me, sometimes even unfavorably comparing me to her.  When I finally gave him an ultimatum, stalking her or being my friend, he chose to continue...
    trucktippingover trucktippingover 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 28, 2010

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    Flirting With Disaster

    Perhaps Morrisey said it best, "I want the one I can't have, and it's driving me mad. It's all over, all over, all over, all over my face.." He's unavailable in every sense of the word (maybe that's part of what draws me to him?). Hundreds of miles away and married with a family...
    PollySyllabacus PollySyllabacus 22-25, F 5 Responses Dec 28, 2012

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    It's definitely more

    so the unavailable than don't like me. In this story I'm going to talk about several different guys. I'll mention their name at the beginning of each story. The first story is a story about Ash. Ash was the friend of a distant friend. He just walked up to me one day and asked...
    cemarie128 cemarie128 18-21, F Apr 19

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    Everything I Desire Is Hurting Me.

    I have had it up to here. I will no longer pursue, or even peruse, the impossible.
    TheRealWoman TheRealWoman 31-35, F 9 Responses Oct 11, 2009

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    FreeNbreezy FreeNbreezy 41-45, F Feb 4

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    No Good Explanation

    I had loving parents, didn't have a distant dad, am pretty and confident.  But I tend to go after guys who are not available, either because they live in another country or they report to me that they have a long-distant, long-term girlfriend.  In either case, they're...
    Startnew Startnew 46-50, F Oct 11, 2009

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    They're either married,

    emotionally unavailable or aren't interested in me because of their sexual orientation. It's like I subconsciously scope out the people in a room who are completely unavailable.
    beautyofuncertainty beautyofuncertainty 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 19

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    I'm In Love With A Married Guy

    I truly, hopelessly, unconditionally  love a married guy. What should I do? I know that I can never have him but I can't stay without him. :( ... I always end up with someone whom I can never have for myself :'(
    rainbow82 rainbow82 26-30, F 11 Responses Dec 13, 2010

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    So Frustrating

    Ive been in so  many wonderful relationships, that I feel we have a connection, an understanding of each other...can say anything and have a great comfort zone where you feel so excepted.  And everytime something happens or comes up where they have to or want to leave the state...
    jojo31 jojo31 31-35, F Aug 31, 2011

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    Everyone That I Have A Crush On Is Unavailable :(

    1st I develop a crush on a guy named Brennen and he's in a really committed with an amazing girl and even though it sucks for me, I'm really happy for them! They look perfect together Now I have two crushes; one on my straight best friend, Avneet and the other one is on my...
    energizerbunnay energizerbunnay 18-21, F 4 Responses Sep 25, 2011

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    C-note

    Story of my life...I've gone through so much pain and trouble because of this girl. But I've also learned a lot about myself and life in general. First of all I'm definitely a shy guy. It's not in my nature to go out partying and/or being the life of the party. Now I'm not...
    GooderThanB4 GooderThanB4 26-30, M May 3, 2012

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    Story Of My Life For Real

    I am so sick of it.Every single time I meet a guy I really like, he's unavailable somehow. Recently I started talking to a great guy who (so far) seems like exactly what I am looking for. He's intelligent beyond belief, emotionally sensitive, kind, easy to talk to, cute, and...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 1 Response Aug 8, 2013

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    Is It A Result Of Being Unavailable Myself?

    I am attracted to emotionaly unavailable people, and lately I started to think why. Was is just bad luck to run in to them or was it me. I googled it and a lot of articals are saying that you fall for this kind of people because actually you are unavailable too. I don't know. I...
    notnownotever notnownotever 18-21, F Jul 2, 2013

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    I have this habit of falling

    for charismatic guys who consider everyone they meet a friend. What usually happens is that they're nice to me (because they're nice to everyone, not because they have special feelings for me), I fall for them, and I get my heart broken. I'm so used to people ignoring me due to...
    RobinDaggers RobinDaggers 26-30, F 1 Response Feb 17

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    Emotionally Unavailable

    Yup, I can sure pick them.  I married someone who was emotionally unavailable. I fell in love with a guy who was emotionally unavailable.I recently dated someone who was emotionally unavailable.None of these men hate me.  Two of them loved me.  The other guy liked me. Now I...
    Mahal1023 Mahal1023 46-50, F 4 Responses Sep 9, 2011

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    ....and I Am In The Situation Now

    Have been for 5 years.  Same woman.  What the eff is wrong with me?  I left a 23 year relationship 5 years ago, because I fell in love again "with someone unavailable"....someone who loves me as a friend, and once upon a time she almost left her relationship for me.  Yeah, I...
    Icarus2006 Icarus2006 51-55, F 4 Responses Jul 13, 2011

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    What Motivates You To Seek The Unavailable

    Ok, ladies, As I prepare to jump into a hornets nest let me say this: Some women don't necessarily want to be in love they just love to be wanted. The challenge to obtain the unattainable or the idea of being picked over the other women is motivating in itself. I am not saying...
    finity finity 46-50, M 1 Response Nov 15, 2012

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    I've spent years analyzing my ****** love life

    and came to see a pattern in it - and it could not be more obvious: I FALL FOR PEOPLE I CAN'T HAVE (but I'm unsure why) I think I've explored almost all the possible cases of unavailability now, followed by heartache and/or rejection. But let's not get ahead of myself... It...
    MissMojo MissMojo 18-21, F Jan 6

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    My Curse

    As a lesbian among straight girls,could it be any other way?
    PantherShadow PantherShadow 13-15, F Oct 12, 2009

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    I Too, Have Noticed This Pattern In My Life

    I have began to realize that ever since my second divorce (yep, I sure can pick 'em) that I have fallen for two men that are unavailable to me. A few years ago, it was a much, much older man. He was single, no kids, but he was in his 50s while I was 27. I have no idea why I...
    sweetie8403 sweetie8403 26-30, F 1 Response Jul 3, 2013

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    To Be Expected...

    "Hi I'm ____, nice to meet you!" Are you married? Check. Do you have a girlfriend? Check. Are you a few hundred to a few thousand miles away from me? Check. Do you only like me as a friend or friend w/ benifts? Check. The Point: Why ask if I know at least one of the answers...
    LovelessDeluxe LovelessDeluxe 22-25 3 Responses Mar 9, 2011

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    Loving Unavailable People

    All my life, and I'm 49 now, I've fallen in love with person after person who doesn't return my affections ... I mean, everybody has these experiences, but mine are more like fantasy/obsessions. I had these obsessions even when I was married. My spouse and I were friends but...
    oskiesmom oskiesmom 46-50 7 Responses Jan 22, 2009

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    I don't know how to feel.

    Is it obsession or something real when you can't think about anyone else but this one person, when your day is not fulfilled until you've seen them, spoken with them, laughed at a silly passing joke? Is it something my mind has concocted to pass the time, something to strive for...
    AxDisorientedxMind AxDisorientedxMind 22-25, F May 31

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    The Road Not Taken

    I've known her since high school. Not the thinnest (might be classified as big boned), not the prettiest (her two sisters got the looks - seriously), but she's the most amazing woman I know. She's always had this energy, this glow, about her that made me want to be with her...
    scarsmart scarsmart 41-45, M 2 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    He's Confused And He Confused Me Too.

    I knew him since last 5 years but fell for him a few months back. I told him all this and he said that he isn't interested. Still, we used to converse frequently as friends. He often used to give me those intense looks but when I asked him he said that no I like someone else. He...
    anushka98 anushka98 16-17, F Nov 21, 2013

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    Related Experiences

    Exactly. I don't have time for people that are rude to me Tonight, I drove an hour to get this man from work and take him home. We arrive at his place. There's such limited...
    IntomeYousee IntomeYousee 36-40, F 2 Responses Dec 13

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    I am a 21 year old college student. I have a narcissistic personality disorder, but am seeing a counselor and dealing with it day to day.My family has supported me my entire life...
    Anon0ne Anon0ne 18-21, M Nov 27

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    Its really hard when you've lived with a parent who is so against people who are gay and you are completely for it. You don't want to cause problems so you don't disagree with them...
    Lai96 Lai96 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 23

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    I don't really get the whole process of doing this? Like who are you to shame someone for being themselves. I feel if you don't like something about yourself change it. And for...
    AshCakes AshCakes 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 21

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    I literally met this guy on this app and he chatted me first. At first it was okay until he started being mean. He mad me feel terrible on the inside and I just wanted to meet new...
    quarioj quarioj 16-17, M 3 Responses Dec 1

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    Seriously though, grow up. what are we 5? Im not even gay and i don't like it. People do stuff. Get over it
    TheWickedJester TheWickedJester 26-30, M 2 Responses Nov 23

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    I don't like labels. Why so we have to label everything? I don't know care if you're gay, straight, bisexual, transgender etc. if that's who you are, I totally and utterly respect...
    trappedgirl17 trappedgirl17 16-17, F Nov 28

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    I really don't like how they portray gay people in the media as these really flamboyant and fashion savvy men with heavy lisps and these butch lesbians with short hair, deep voices...
    SylverCoyote SylverCoyote 18-21, M 1 Response Nov 29

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    I really don't care. I accepted way back that not everyone is going to like me. Sure it may have bothered me a time or two. Now What bothers me is people who pretend to like me but...
    lake1107 lake1107 31-35, F Nov 29

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    i not only like but i also give much respect to real people who are themselves and are not masked by anything who are not afraid of who they are or of their weakness. in short i...
    sly15 sly15 22-25, F 2 Responses 23 hrs ago

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    Okay so my in laws and I don't get along! They are sneaky, deceptive, fake, and the list could go on and on One example out of many is when I was in the hospital having my...
    Virgo1981 Virgo1981 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 23

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    I hate the image and cage engraved by the ppl who don't like me. I don't like them either but I don't spread my opinions about them. just because my individual experience with them...
    TheAnonymous99 TheAnonymous99 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 24

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    never jealous that's for certain but when I see someone who just takes what they have for granted (relationships, cars, people, finances, etc). I don't get it! how could they be so...
    Mystique91 Mystique91 22-25, F 1 Response Nov 29

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    That moment when people talk about their relationship, and how it's working so well ect. I really try to be happy for those people, but in truth I just feel like someone is waving...
    dabram71 dabram71 16-17, M Dec 6

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    Nothing worse then a cyber bully who picks on people who are already feeling vulnerable and sad , pathetic individuals they are 💩👋
    ItsJustMeNiki ItsJustMeNiki 18-21, F 4 Responses 4 days ago

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    XxMelissaLxX <--This woman blocked me because I proposed to do what she requested in a post. If you do not want to be blocked by her, be careful. EP has prevented me from...
    Dave34S Dave34S 31-35, M 2 Responses Dec 9

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    I am who i am, unless your close to me i could care less if you don't like me. Everybody can't like everybody. That would just be boring
    TheWickedJester TheWickedJester 26-30, M Nov 23

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    I don't care if people don't like me, but I'll make damn sure to return the same amount of respect that I receive. If you're a condescending *****, I will utterly humiliate you.
    Xplictt Xplictt 22-25, M 1 day ago

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    I don't feel comfortable in a swimsuit with my body type. Not even a one piece I just don't want others to see my stretch marks and I don't like my thighs
    AshCakes AshCakes 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 21

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    I don't like wearing bikinis because of my stretch marks being on my butt cheeks and lower back. It's Embarrassing. I wouldn't even go skinny dipping with friends. If I do put on a...
    lorrena19 lorrena19 18-21, F Nov 21

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    Yeah I don't like it, I don't find it sexist I just think it's a bit personal for a stranger to call me that, babe is the worst!
    claireblack claireblack 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 25

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    I don't like it because I hate silent moments when I said what I needed to say and want to hang up but you still want to stay on the phone. Rather text, so I could reply when I see...
    samsdname samsdname 18-21, F Nov 25

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