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I Always Want to Be In Control

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 395 People

    To Hell With Kindness?

    Have you ever experienced any situation which made you think maybe you're too kind? Maybe you're that person who always looks out for others, concern about them. Whenever your friends are feeling down and sad, you are there for them. Putting whatever you're doing aside just to...
    kemi8698 kemi8698 22-25, F Jun 3, 2012

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    I Want to Be In Control...

    however, i am unable to do so. I am in control of one thing...and thats myself...
    lovelybonez17 lovelybonez17 16-17, F Aug 20, 2008

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    Not Any More..............

    No matter how one defines it, I was the one in control, the in charge person. I was on my own from the time I was 16 and self reliant before that. I was a Navy man with 30 men working under me. I have been in supervisory positions for many years as well. Sounds nice, but the...
    extremedad extremedad 41-45, M 1 Response Apr 10, 2010

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    To Them I'm Just Crazy

     I always want to be in control but In my family im considered just a kid and nothing more. I'm supposed to come when called. Sit when asked. And obey. what i want is not for me to decide it's for someone else too. I'm not in control of  this. I must listen to...
    Passionfruit3 Passionfruit3 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 16, 2009

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    And that's why I'm always paranoid.

    I always want to be in control and I can't stand the things I can't control in life. Screw the world. It's every man for himself :)
    tangledweb94 tangledweb94 18-21, M 2 days ago

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    There Are Times That I Wish I Was

         there are tiems that I wish that I could be in control. That is when I wish that I could do what ever that I want. With out haviong someone keeping a eye on me. I know that I can't live on my own. But I would just like to feel like. I am able to be in control. But I...
    acjf acjf 22-25, F Jan 10, 2011

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    Not So Bad

    It's really not so bad to want to be in control of yourself-it's when you want to be in control of others that it becomes difficult-suffocating to them-making them not want to be in your company.  Self control is the one thing that most people don't practice enough of. ...
    SunnyHoney SunnyHoney 36-40, F Jul 3, 2009

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    But Getting Better At It

    Having been thrown into adulthood at the age of 16, I was forced to be in control of everything. Early on I had to 'fend for myself'. I have been in numerous supervisory positions and that tends to boost the ego as well. One of the hardest things for me is delegating, well...
    extremedad extremedad 41-45, M 1 Response Jan 11, 2008

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    Younger Days

    In my younger days living with an abusive alcoholic father and a battered wife syndome mother I want control so there would be peace and harmony....that what started me on my quest to find it and over the years found iit inside of me and moved it to places I lived and...
    PoppaBear53 PoppaBear53 56-60, M Jan 7, 2012

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    Or Else I Lose It...

    If I can not control my situation... ANYTHING I am in... I lose it. Like this whole flight thing tomorrow... I have no control over that and its going to drive me CRAZY until I land at the airport. I have to be in control at all times. Not in a...
    Silver01ta Silver01ta 31-35, M 1 Response Nov 12, 2008

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    I Never Feel Like a Control Freak...

    Just like I know so much better than most people what should be done...or that I want to help somehow...or make things perfect so everyone can be a little happier...or that I'm terrified everything's going to fall apart and I'm going to end up old and lonely and broke and unknown...
    donquixote11 donquixote11 26-30, F Jun 13, 2009

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    I try to control everything in my life,

    from the thoughts in my head to the specific way I say "hello" to people. I try to control every aspect of my life and maybe that's why I feel so frustrated? Maybe if I give up control things will just happen, instead of me making them happen. But in my mind how can I get...
    TheBlackLabel TheBlackLabel 18-21, F 1 Response Jul 2, 2014

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    I want to die first,

    before anyone I love dies. Please god, me first!!! I will get ready.
    ijustneedtoletitout ijustneedtoletitout 31-35, F 1 Response Mar 27, 2014

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    In Control Or Let Go Is the Question

    I naturally like being in control, like any human, however, like you I may have learned through experience that there is a time to let go. We have all heard the story of the way monkeys were caught. Goards with an opening big enough for the monkey's hand had food placed inside...
    Radiant Radiant 56-60, F 2 Responses Mar 28, 2008

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    Well, Here Is the Thing:

    I have a love/hate relationship with the whole thing. Please someone tell me: how do i stop wanting to be a control freak!
    ritchflynn ritchflynn 22-25, M Jun 14, 2009

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    I Am Just Thinking of How M...

    I am just thinking of how much better I could make things!
    Shaylon Shaylon 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 18, 2008

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    Anger Evil ...

    Im usually in control but not when Im in anger .. Its the worst evil for me .. Control has gone completely when Im obsessed by anger .. I don't wanna be angry but sometimes its just too hard to be in control lol
    DollyDiva DollyDiva 22-25, F 14 Responses Jan 10, 2010

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    I Am Never In Control During Sex

    Looking back over my experiences with about 5 women, I realize they were in control once I showed my desire for sex. They decided wheher to go further, what to let me touch, what to unbutton and unhook, how far ro go, then even the position she wanted, usually on top so she...
    anthony2001 anthony2001 61-65, M 3 Responses Sep 19, 2010

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    It's Not You, It's Me.

    I don't necessarily have to be in control of everything around me, but, when it comes to me or my body, I try to be in complete control. I must be in control of my thoughts, emotions, actions, and decisions. I freak out if I cannot think properly because of medication. I...
    maeven maeven 18-21, F Jul 12, 2009

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    Growing up I had so little choice in my life I

    was constantly under the whims of others. Now due to my time in the military I want to be in charge. To be able to guide others wills to match my own. At times this gets me into trouble, especially with the wife. I'm constantly reminding myself to tone it down, let others go...
    Sandstorm32 Sandstorm32 26-30, M Nov 25, 2014

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    Everyone Does...

    I have found in my very short life, when other people are in control bad things can, and will happen. But when ever I decide to take control of a situation these things tend not to happen. Of course, I've also come to another conclusion in my life. People are idiots, I am not...
    Cnbrrn Cnbrrn 16-18, M 4 Responses Nov 19, 2007

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    Related Experiences

    I don't care what anyone says I have always wanted an older brother ever since I was little and I still really want one sooooo bad. But I guess it's too late for that lol
    Alexlovesmusic Alexlovesmusic 13-15, F 2 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    I hate how I was born I wish I could be a girl, I want to be female not make, I've always wanted that, but now I don't even look like a girl because no one ever told me about...
    thekittyscall thekittyscall 16-17, T 2 Responses Jan 5

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    always wanted to live home at 18 and at 27 still here
    thejoyprovider thejoyprovider 26-30, M 1 Response Jan 4

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    Ive always wanted to be a big brother. x3 Never had the chance tho.
    BlowpopYum BlowpopYum 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 17

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    2014 Review 2014 was a year of firsts in my crossdressing adventures, as I was able to go out dressed for a new record number of hours. Some of those extra hours were those that I...
    1SarahAnn 1SarahAnn 46-50, M 2 Responses Jan 4

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    I truly want that large family. You know those crazy neighbors down the block with the active kids, who always seem to have another on the way? I'd like that to be my family. Seems...
    ryanjames23 ryanjames23 26-30, M 2 hrs ago

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    New Years Eve 2014 My wife and I have spent the three previous New Year’s Eve nights out of town at small hotels. Each of these hotels had a small lounge and a party to bring in...
    1SarahAnn 1SarahAnn 46-50, M 2 Responses Jan 6

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    Maybe not always but I've recently become curious about how I'd look as a girl and how differently people would treat me
    thesentinel02 thesentinel02 22-25, M 7 Responses Jan 8

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    I know for certain that I'm in the wrong body. I've wanted to be a girl since I was five years old... it's one of the earliest memories I have and most importantly it's by far and...
    girlguy1300 girlguy1300 36-40, T 4 Responses Jan 8

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    I miss my personal library of old books; reference books, medical manuals, bibles, and so on. I'm slowly rebuilding my collection these days. Lack of space and shelves and money...
    Doviov Doviov 41-45 Jan 12

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    I do wish I had a younger sister.. I'm the youngest of four with no connection to my siblings.. I wanted someone to love as a siblings and share special moments with, as I grow...
    BlowpopYum BlowpopYum 22-25, M Jan 17

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    I cross dressed and got caught many time by my mother. She said no way I could be a girl. I was a boy so start acting like one. Like that helped. My life took a big turn when I...
    bpb62 bpb62 61-65, T 4 Responses 5 days ago

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    I got married when I was 17 and it all came crashing down on me 6 years later which is where I am now. It's over but I'm excited for the opportunity to become the awesome improved...
    xxdublifexx xxdublifexx 22-25, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    As long as I can remember I felt I was a girl. I am lucky my Mother actually listen to me. My dad wasn't excited about the way I felt but went along with it. I had a bother 3...
    TonytoToni TonytoToni 22-25, T 13 Responses Dec 31, 2014

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    yesterday when i put my female clothes it made me fell like i should actually be a girl. that night i had a dream that i was giving birth
    Manudglh96 Manudglh96 18-21, M 3 Responses Jan 7

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    I'd love to be able to challenge someone in real life to a weight gain contest. That way, I'd get encouragement to get fat fast!
    ifrive1974 ifrive1974 13-15, M 1 Response Jan 9

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    Its literally my dream. But i know i could never do it. I have alot of flaws and scars:/
    scarxscar scarxscar 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 9

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    Sadly I don't have a choice at birth to choose being raised as a girl.
    AsianTransGirl AsianTransGirl 26-30, T 2 Responses Jan 9

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    it is a life-long quest… I have travelled the globe.. seen moonrise over the Grand Canyon.. Marvelled at the Mayan pyramids, immersed myself in eucalyptus drenched air of the...
    Diginator Diginator 70+, M 2 Responses Jan 10

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    I really need a sister now!! Will anyone be my sister??
    beatricemorgan beatricemorgan 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 10

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    Sometimes you just have to let go of the WHY because the person your asking it from doesn't care enough about you to give you a genuine honest answer. All a person can do at that...
    Welllaugh Welllaugh 36-40, F 1 Response Jan 11

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    Perhaps my ideas weren't enough, I think I should be more innovative and come up with things others won't.
    ZADoubleMesser ZADoubleMesser 22-25, F 3 Responses Jan 12

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    This aint so bad! Its actualy kinda cool
    lewiscs lewiscs 18-21, M Jan 13

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    I am very confident that i am a beautiful person in and out but irrespective of this inner feeling i believe in looking my best depending on a circumstance.
    poisedjaber poisedjaber 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 16

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    I am seeking a big brother who is 18+
    matrixwolf matrixwolf 16-17, M Jan 16

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    My grandfather cared for me a lot.He passed away when I was four.Yesterday,my aunt rang me .She told me she had found a telegram sent by him informing her of my birth.I immediately...
    restored87 restored87 46-50, F 3 Responses Jan 19

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