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I Am a Child Abuse Survivor

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 10,732 People

    My cousin molested me

    since i was to young to remember. I started to realize it was wrong around the ages of 7-8. He slept over all the time practically lived with me. I started to tie my pajamas really tight or wear jeans to bed but he would always get them off. One night i stayed up till the...
    Prettygurl234 Prettygurl234 16-17, F 8 Responses Nov 22, 2014

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    I had a flashback the other day.

    I went to get in the shower and it happened. I was back in that house, in the bathroom, the water in the tub was filling with scolding hot water. Then he throws me in it. Im screaming, fighting for air. My skin is burning and I feel like im gonna die. Finally he lets me out...
    darebearsworld darebearsworld 16-17, F Mar 18

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    I was sexually abused by two brothers over a

    four year period. It started when i was 8. Thought it was my fault, still kinda do. I mean, if I hadn't been born, it wouldn't of happened. I had the same nightmare night after night. When I finally told someone, I felt so embarrassed. I still do to this day. I couldn't change...
    gr8love gr8love 31-35, F 19 Responses Mar 9, 2014

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    When I was like 5 my moms boyfriend would abuse

    me and my brothers everyday until she got home it was a living hell.
    Marines75 Marines75 13-15, M 7 Responses Mar 22

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    My Father And I

    It was Saturday, I hated Saturdays! My mother being a motor welder/winder used to love Saturdays. She would dress up from head to toe to meet her friends for lunch then do groceries. She'd be gone for hours. I can remember begging to go with her and she'd always say "No", my...
    SparkofHope SparkofHope 46-50, F 19 Responses Sep 26, 2013

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    I have this crush on a boy at my school.

    But, I don't know how I will react to dating and having to be physical towards him (holding hands, talking, etc.) I don't know if I am capable of being loved anymore. Would he want me if he knew about my past? Im scared. I don't know if im ready for this...
    darebearsworld darebearsworld 16-17, F 2 Responses 4 days ago

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    It started as far back

    as I can remember. My dad first, touching me where I shouldn't be touched. Then my brother raping me when I was 9. It went on for many years, but when I turned 12, the unthinkable happened. My "friend" took me to a party in my neighborhood. But it wasn't a party. I met a 30 year...
    darebearsworld darebearsworld 16-17, F 3 Responses Feb 28

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    Ofelia, Or How Another Book Saved My Life.

    I like keeping certain things in order. My room, desk, and papers may look like a complete mess to an untrained eye, but my thoughts and memories are always preserved with a flawless method because since I cannot forget, keeping all the drawers in my mind clean allows me to put...
    sweetmeisje sweetmeisje 26-30, F 33 Responses Jul 18, 2010

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    I’m not sure when the latter state of mind

    ended and the former started. It’s like the event horizon of a black hole The outcome is obvious but it’s conception is hidden in plain sight. Ignored symptoms manifest themselves as an inability to progress forward. At this point, the only option is to cease functioning...
    Bonocular Bonocular 56-60, M Jan 31

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    I have carried the guilt

    and pain with me for over 30 years never telling anyone what had happened. Its only now i find the strength to talk about the abuse. Why does it have to be so hard. I have days when i just want to end it all but somehow just keep on going.
    alexed65 alexed65 46-50, M 4 Responses Mar 7, 2014

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    My brother from so long ago physically sexually

    verbally abused me I was a frightened little girl who was always hiding n running away but was always found Very very violent n strong I tried to stop him but felt paralysed back then I wanted to shout stop but the words wouldn't come out n I had no realisation to tell...
    LATEENO79 LATEENO79 31-35, F 4 Responses Jan 29

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    Power Is Rebellion. It will serve you well to

    place the people behind bars. or at least destroy them emotionally, spiritually.
    Gabster27 Gabster27 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 18

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    YesSir3845 YesSir3845 16-17, F 4 Responses Mar 21

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    To me, my parents were just *****

    and egg donors . They have some kind of love towards us in them, and they are good people now i think, but that doesn't matter to me anymore. I've established boundaries and don't intend to ever see them again. If I'm out of state, I likely might not even attend their funerals...
    Ajushi Ajushi 41-45, M 3 Responses Jan 6

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    I've known for a long time

    that I was emotionally abused by my mom and dad. Separately. Recently though I've started having memories slowly leak in that tell me that I was sexually abused as well. I was always glad that I could talk about the emotional abuse to my support people, but I feel like I can't...
    chococat159 chococat159 18-21 2 Responses Feb 14

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    When I was on this website into thousand 13 I

    posted a story about my child abuse. That part of my life is now behind me. I am grateful for a wonderful psychologist and a wonderful God. I'm not going to repost the story because it would be fruitless. But anyone who needs to talk please message me. My name is Bob. I know I...
    lovlife777 lovlife777 46-50, M 2 Responses 5 days ago

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    My Mother Destroyed Me

    When I was a child my mother abused me mentally, verbally, emotionally and physically. She used to beat me in the face and head, call me names, pull my hair and made me believe I was worthless. For most of my childhood, I didn't realize I was being abused. I guess I just...
    AyselMoonbaby AyselMoonbaby 31-35, F 110 Responses Mar 18, 2011

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    I was abused from the time

    that I was 4 until 21 years old. I was sexually abused when I was 4 years old. When I tried to tell my mom, she threatened to beat me. Then I was physically, sexually, verbally and mentally abused constantly until I left for college. My parents were also in a religious cult for...
    KateMorrow92 KateMorrow92 22-25, F 2 Responses Feb 9

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    THE TALL POLICEMAN DIDNT LISTEN:It was in May.

    . Still too cold for the public swimming pool to be opened..We lived in Vernayaz, a very small village, close to a town called Martigny, where the public pool was...I was with my friend Sandra who was 7 or 8 like me. It was after lunch, we were walking my dog near an electricity...
    Sorrentina Sorrentina 41-45, F 12 Responses Jul 6, 2014

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    this is the 1st time I am mentioning this

    after 37 years. I remember my brother telling me that I can't tell anyone as he will get in trouble because people won't understand. that moment burnt it self into my mind forever.
    tony71tony tony71tony 41-45, M 2 Responses Jan 6

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    Happy People And Me

    I was abused verbally, physically, sexually.The main one being my dad, although it was my uncle who raped me first.But my dad had continued access, and he used it.My mom worked every night-well, five days a week, and...yeah.So my experience is that the worst thing that can...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 26 Responses Jun 27, 2011

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    When I was five years old,

    I did something to upset my father. I still don't know what that was, but I know what the consequences were. My sleeves were never long enough to cover the bruises that seemed to stretch on for miles. The ones on my arms were from being grabbed hard and thrown or pulled. The...
    myar myar 26-30, M 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    Time To Share

    I haven't really talked a whole lot about my past here, but recently, I think I have felt inspired to do so because of the strength of other friends in my circle who have talked about their experience. I think it's important to share, not for the purpose of reliving the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 32 Responses Apr 30, 2011

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    My Childhood

    Violence was very commonplace at home. I would often ask my mother whether it was normal to be beaten up by my father. She would reply that I was lucky to have a father who could provide for us and that complaining was very ungrateful towards my parents and towards God's...
    deleted deleted 26-30 27 Responses Jun 10, 2013

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    For a long time i used 2 blame myself

    for the physical, mental & sexual abuse that was inflicted on me, blamed myself because i used to beg to God and beg in my head please make him come to me and not my wee sister or brother or my mother.
    Pennycaca Pennycaca 36-40, F 1 Response Feb 1

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    I Am Striving To Thrive

    For now, I am a survivor. My parents were teenage hippies and I do believe they wanted me, but had no idea what they were doing. Not that any parent really knows what they're doing, but some are a lot more prepared by an emotional maturity that most teens are not yet capable of...
    lovevolves8 lovevolves8 36-40, F 3 Responses Oct 15, 2013

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    Being a survivor is something I embrace in

    myself. I could ponder endlessly as to why I experienced the trauma... and believe me, I have. But honestly, I've fought hard to put it behind me and rise above... to end the nightmare of the storm it created within me. Surviving is about living... and life is too short for...
    WithGracefulness WithGracefulness 46-50, F 10 Responses Jan 26

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    I'm also a child abuse survivor this is the

    only thing destroying my heart my soul my life this pain of feeling someone used my weakness took my innocence and made me a destroyed person and having chronic feeling of anxiety fears having Many phobias being alive but dead inside I d want to meet anyone like me and talk...
    emmadarko emmadarko 22-25, F 7 Responses 1 day ago

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    Talking about my past still makes my skin creep,

    my butt pucker, and my emotions go on overdrive. It always makes me cry, and I've learned to just go with it. Crying is cleansing. It is the terror that insidiously seeps into my subconscious mind that is the worst. My dreams last night were unusually terrifying! I hate...
    brokenat5 brokenat5 61-65, M 1 Response Feb 1

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    This story is my own,

    I’m not telling it to get pity but cause it helps to talk about it and I know it can help others in the same situation or who have been there…. This is not a fun story, some may find it hard some may find it hard… some can relate.. When I was born, I already had a big...
    ChantouKimmy ChantouKimmy 41-45, F 7 Responses Mar 20

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    a problem I feel powerless too.

    ..I stayed with my best friends sister(jess) after my dad died and she became a good friend also she much older. She always had trouble finding love and about four years ago she married this man shed only known for six months. two years in they have two daughters. this past year...
    ericaswife11 ericaswife11 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 20

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    Dear Daddy, I loved you

    so I hope you know I looked up to you even though You took my grace, you took my faith You made me weak and such a disgrace Just a baby, innocent, and whole You took that a away, all of it you stole And now I am here, shattered and confused How someone so little could take...
    deleted deleted 26-30 17 Responses Dec 5, 2013

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    I am always available to talk to anyone

    struggling with the same history. There is no right or wrong response. Pain manifests in ways that cause a reaction. Freeing the person you have always known yourself to be is difficult beyond belief. I lived in fear for over ten years. As a grade schooler I was punched in...
    FrictionFractal FrictionFractal 26-30, M 6 hrs ago

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    Strong

    Please be aware, the story may contain triggers. Please stop reading if you feel you've had enough. I need to write and share this, but there is no need for you to suffer from what I wrote. Today I feel strong. Usually I use those days to be merry and happy, but today I...
    Idonwannadie Idonwannadie 46-50, M 14 Responses Sep 27, 2012

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    The Nightmare Has Ended

    I have lived the last 20 years of my life either being abused by you or abusing myself with alcohol and other addictions in an attempt to escape the memories of your torment. During the decade of abuse I always hoped that you would “accidently” kill me. I had hoped you would...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Nov 20, 2013

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    I have so many abuses being child,

    I don't know what to say..
    xRohit xRohit 31-35, M 1 Response Feb 16

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    A Few Words Of Encouragement

    before i let anyone in on my abuse story, i just want to say how grateful we should all be that we even RECOGNIZE that we were abused. there are many people who take tons of therapy to learn these things about their lives. i had to teach myself through small baby steps how to do...
    foldedunfolding foldedunfolding 31-35, F 16 Responses Jun 1, 2012

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    HOW TO HEAL YOUR BRAIN: 1.

    READ THESE BOOKS TO UNDERSTAND WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR BRAIN AND HOW TO IMPROVE IT. What happened is you lacked human intimacy and attachment. You were starved for love, and if you're still lacking healthy intimate attachment relationship as an adult, then you are still some...
    Ajushi Ajushi 41-45, M 3 Responses Jun 5, 2014

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    Abuse Comes In Many Forms and Degrees

      When I was a teenager, my mom kicked my step dad out when I told her he'd been sexually abusing my sister and me. There were tears and hugs that one night and then everything was expected to go on as normal. My mom acted like she didn't want to put us through a...
    sufirehorse66 sufirehorse66 46-50, F 32 Responses Aug 27, 2009

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    Why We Keep Bringing It Up...an Essay

    So…dragonofjapan said something: “Yes, you were abused, but what are you going to do about it right now?” So I was thinking about that. What a lot of abuse survivors do…appears like wallowing. In some cases, it may actually be wallowing…but for most of us… What...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 54 Responses Jan 20, 2012

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    I was 11 years old, my mom was working,

    my stepdad was drinking his usual beer. I was in my room trying to stay out of his way I didn't want another beating from his belt. It wasn't long before I heard him calling my name. I went downstairs and he told me to bring him another beer. When I handed him the beer he...
    sarah95w sarah95w 18-21, F 21 Responses Apr 22, 2014

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    This is only a small amount of the abuse

    that has happened in my childhood. It happened by many people for a long time. But this is what I need to talk about right now. I have a very large amount of stuff to talk about. I just got out of therapy and I'm just shaking like a leaf right now. It was a very difficult...
    ChantelSurvived ChantelSurvived 22-25, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    My Parents

    I have never received a hug or kiss from my parents. If I have I don't remember it. I've never gotten a birthday present or blown out candles. I didn't know kids got all this until I made real friends in 5th grade. I didn't understand. My friends don't understand how I could get...
    atraptbird atraptbird 16-17, F 34 Responses Jun 28, 2009

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    Since I'm new here, I won't go into a lot of

    details. To be honest, I remember very little of my life before I was adopted at age 6. Before that is mostly blank. What I do remember crushes my spirit, and frightens me. Often I relive a murder I witnessed at age 5, and I cannot, though I have tried, deal with that as a...
    WilliamBennett WilliamBennett 61-65, M 4 Responses Feb 15

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    I Cant Find My Strength Anymore

    Id like to start of by saying how incredible it is to read so many inspirational stories and to not feel so alone. Im a woman of 21 (I say woman but im not quite there yet) im currently in the middle of the courtcase that i feel is going to make or break me. My father having...
    annonymous2012 annonymous2012 18-21, F 5 Responses Dec 14, 2012

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    I remember being 6 years old

    and my older siblings had left home. My mother had jus had the youngest in our family. The twins were almost 3. My mother was a very sick alcoholic. Our father was the worst pervert I have ever met in real life. They started me on drugs and alcohol at this early age. After about...
    squirllykid squirllykid 46-50, F 4 Responses Aug 4, 2014

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