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I Am a Child Sexual Abuse Survivor

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 563 People

    My Husband'S Perspective On Being Married To A Sexually Abused Woman.

    My husband just wrote this from a man's perspective on being married to a woman who has suffered sexual abuse. It isn't too detailed, but maybe there is a key somewhere in his words. I too felt like I was the other woman in my mother's marriage and it was so horrific dealing...
    mendingbrokenwings mendingbrokenwings 51-55, F Jun 23, 2013

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    My Abuse Happened A Long Time Ago In West Germany

    I am a 49 year old that now resides in the USA. Since last year I have started emotional therapy. It's something that I did not wanted to deal with. I had therapy when me and my deceased husband was divorcing and then reconsealing because he was dying of cancer . He had no one to...
    angelika64 angelika64 46-50, F Sep 5, 2013

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    I am a female who was violently sexually abused

    by her mother. My mother got pleasure from trying to damage my sexual areas. She was jealous of my (appropriate) relationship with my father. I have a younger sister who was treated decently. For many years I avoided the emotional damage. I used drugs and alcohol. I was...
    behindacloseddoor behindacloseddoor 31-35, F 2 Responses Apr 25

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    when i was 3 i was almost raped.

    my mother had left me and my little brother with her best friends younger brother who was 15 i think. he tried luring me with candy and oreos but i wouldnt go near him. he chased me down picked me up. i was kicking and screaming. he threw me down on the bed and started trying to...
    ijustcantsleeptonight ijustcantsleeptonight 22-25, F Apr 12

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    Homeschooler Abused By Brother For Years

    I was brought up in a reformed christian homeschooling group. I was not allowed to wear pants and do normal activities as it may come across not modest enough. However, this did not stop me from being sexually abused from the age of 5 to 12 years by my brother who is only 7 years...
    LifeExtra LifeExtra 18-21, F 1 Response Jun 26, 2013

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    If People Don't Understand Why Do They Still Have An Opinion!!!

    I was abused as a child. From the ages of 6 to 12 my abuser took me from my home a few times a week - my parents happily watched him leave with me...sometimes I would go to him myself - he lived close by. When it began at the age of 6 I was terrified - and I hated him...but over...
    Flugelblues Flugelblues 31-35, F 21 Responses May 26, 2009

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    Sexually Abused At 4 Pt 5

    Okay, time for daily therapy session with the self. I don't even feel like writing about it. I feel lazy, but I don't have anything to do today so I'll do this, then I'll finish a movie I was trying to watch yesterday. Not sad today even though I remember more details for some...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F Jun 24, 2013

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    Abused At Age 9 By Older Brother, But Liked It.

    It all started when I was 9 years old... it was thunderstorming in the middle of the night and I was afraid, I hated thunderstorms.. I would usually go into my parents room, but they were in a different state for work, and my older sister (19 years) was watching my brother and I...
    hipkids434 hipkids434 22-25, F 3 Responses Sep 18, 2013

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    My Story

    I as far back as I can remember was molested by family members, freinds of family and a neighbor. When i was between the ages of 8 and 9 my stepdad started having sex with me. First by touching then very quickly he started having sex with me on a regular basis. He would give me...
    ALOSTCHILD ALOSTCHILD 31-35, F 11 Responses Nov 2, 2006

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    Wish I Was Dead

    (triggers ahead)......I was asleep last night and dreaming and my wife came in and hugged me from behind...and I woke up to what I thought was him...I remember him pushing against me from behind, telling me to keep my legs together tightly as he rubbed himself between them to...
    hylierandom hylierandom 41-45 7 Responses Jul 11, 2011

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    I'M Going To Admit To You Now Some Of The Terrible Things I Did

    I will explain why I think I did these things first, but it is not an excuse because there are no excuses for being cruel to someone else. I believe that the children who sexually hurt me when I was a child were probably also abused by adults and I believe I hurt them back...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F Jun 26, 2013

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    My Neighbor Abused Me For Years

    When I was four years old, my family moved to a new home. It wasn't long after that when my neighbor, a grown man with children of his own, started molesting me. First, what I remember was him rubbing up against my bottom and then pulling my pants down. I also remember him, at...
    TotallyMiffed TotallyMiffed 56-60 1 Response Oct 8, 2011

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    My Family's Secret

    I suppressed the memories of what happened to me for years. I've opened up within the last 3 years and let it be known what I suffered through my whole childhood. I was abused by my grandfather since I was too young to remember. It stopped at the age 11 only because I stopped...
    Anicole19 Anicole19 18-21, F Oct 18, 2013

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    Does Anyone Else Feel This Way....

    Its more of a question then my story. I was sexual abused by a lot of people when I was younger...And ever since then I always had a rape fantasy. I always felt like it I could roleplay getting raped by my fiance  then it would make then pain go away, that if I could control...
    Sayde709 Sayde709 18-21, F 5 Responses Jun 25, 2011

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    Stolen Childhood

    i have never really told anyone about this my wife knows and i told my mother about ten years ago but i think it is now starting to affect my marriage and i love my wife very much   ok the abuse started when my mom rented a top floor apartment from this older man and...
    jack36 jack36 41-45 6 Responses Mar 5, 2009

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    He Touched Me...

       The two of us were 14 years old and shared a cabin on an oceanliner that was sailing to Europe. The trip included 8 boys and an older married couple that were acting as guides for this group of young boys from a church that my family belonged to. The church had...
    minotgran minotgran 56-60, M Sep 6, 2010

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    Trying Again

    “Please lock the door when you leave for work, I'm not feeling well; I'm going to take a shower and lie down.” Took a shower and went back to the room. Turned around and he was standing there, smiling (she forgot to lock the door). Didn’t know what to say, was a bit...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Oct 14, 2012

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    Afraid Of Sex

    Hey guys. I haven't written on here before, but y'all can probably guess what I'm about to explain from the title. I was sexually abused by my step father for three years straight, and it's not that I'm afraid of sex, but I am worried because I'm almost to the point of marriage...
    hltangway hltangway 18-21, F Oct 9, 2013

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    Sexually Abused At 4 Pt 6

    Okay, now I'm a little bit sad because the movie I'm watching is a teenage coming of age story and they're talking about first kisses. I don't remember my first kiss because my dad used to envelop my mouth and stick his tongue down my throat and I couldn't breathe when he did it...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F Jun 24, 2013

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    No More Secrets, No More Hiding

    It's time for me to be open, to myself and to whoever you are who's reading this. (Background Info) I'm almost 17 years old, and I was sexually abused ages 4-7. May of 2011 was when I finally told my parents. I only told them, so they'd understand why I was, the way I was. At...
    xxworthlessartist xxworthlessartist 18-21, F 11 Responses Jul 22, 2012

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    Are There Coping Strategies?

    I grew up in a big family.Very tight on space,there was a lot of anger in our household.We didnt go hungry but we did go unhappy.For whatever reason or maybe its typical ,there seemed to be an early sexual awareness in me.I dont really remember my father kissing my mother or...
    bluechafer bluechafer 46-50, M Jul 16, 2013

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    Ghost

    I say I am a sexual abuse survivor because I am 21 with a husband who treats me like a princess, a charming 2 year old & a spiritual awakening I would love to share with the world. I was abused for 7 whole years of my life. From the time I was 7 years old to the time I was 14...
    msseaqueen msseaqueen 18-21, F 1 Response Oct 12, 2013

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    Hardest Group For Me to Join

    Since I started here I have seen this group title and similiar ones, and it has given me a pang from within.  I know I have always said would be open and honest but I could not join this group, I clicked a few times and then quickly left before it would turn up in the feed...
    deleted deleted 26-30 15 Responses Sep 29, 2008

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    Why Is Nobody Else Talking Under This Topic?

    The reason why you are following this topic is because you want to hear and talk about something to do with Child Sexual Abuse. Being a victim of child sexual abuse is not shameful. There is nothing wrong with talking about being abused as a woman, as a man, as a girl, as a boy...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F Jun 25, 2013

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    I am new to Experience Project.

    I came here to find forums about sexual abuse because I have been experiencing some flashbacks of late and I feel extremely alone... I don't really know where to begin, to be honest. At age 4, a neighbor boy at least 10 years older than I crossed our lawns after he found me...
    hearts2inspire hearts2inspire 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 24, 2013

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    I Get To Do "Eye Movement Desensitization And Reprocessing" Treatment!

    I don't actually know if this is a good thing, but I'm really excited about it. That treatment is for PTSD, originally a treatment created for Veterans and is still the most successful treatment for them. It's supposed to help bring you back to a flash-back sort of state in which...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F Jul 19, 2013

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    The Man Trapped

    as I enter by early 20s I am plagued by the memory of my molestation , it has robbed be the confidence to be intimate with women and as a result I never moved on pass the friend stage . With that beign said people assume I am gay due to that reason. It is not that I am not...
    johnj91 johnj91 22-25, M Oct 27, 2013

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    My Dad

    W hen I was 11, my father molested me. I didn't know it was him at first because he lived with one of his coworkers. His coworker had a bunch of friends over at the house and they were all drinking. I almost felt in my heart, my gut reaction, was daddy why did u do this. I...
    Aminik Aminik 31-35, F 10 Responses Nov 1, 2007

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    I Still See Him Every Christmas

    It started when I was 3 and ended when I was 6 1/2, that's when my mother left him.  He was my stepfather, and my brothers father, he was also physically abusive.....If given the choice I'd rather be hit than made to touch him, or to have to let him touch me.  It's...
    keyna keyna 36-40, F 9 Responses Apr 20, 2008

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    My Abuse Happened A Long Time Ago In West Germany

    I am a 49 year old that now resides in the USA. Since last year I have started emotional therapy. It's something that I did not wanted to deal with. I had therapy when me and my deceased husband was divorcing and then reconsealing because he was dying of cancer . He had no one to...
    angelika64 angelika64 46-50, F 1 Response Sep 4, 2013

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    Birthday Wishes

    14 years, that's how long I was abused, that's how long I endured the pain that led me to BPD. 14 years of being told my reactions, my feelings, my thoughts were wrong. That I was always wrong...wrong and stupid. 8 of those 14 years were spent locked away, trapped in a room with...
    graychylde graychylde 36-40, F 6 Responses Feb 17, 2012

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    Abused By Brother Flashbacks of Father

    I was sexualy abused by my brother from the age of 5 to the age of 9 it all came out when I was 13 it was my sister that told my mum about it as my brother rubbed him self on her when she was 8 I rememberd what my brother did to me.. the police came out. my brother admitted...
    prodigygirl prodigygirl 26-30 5 Responses Mar 31, 2009

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    Silence Is Not Golden

    I am a Child Sexual Abuse Survivor.  I say the word "survivor" because I am no longer a victim.  Though years have passed since my childhood emotional, sexual and physical abuse, I have learned to navigate the treacherous waters of self-recrimination and blame...
    chambaby chambaby 61-65 1 Response Jul 10, 2009

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    Abusive Family Men

    Growing up, I can remember my brother and cousin abusing me. They would have me touch them or they would try to have sex with me. We have about 5 years in age difference and I believe I am a victim because I was so little I didn't fully understand what they were doing and that...
    Collegegirl14 Collegegirl14 18-21, F 9 Responses Aug 13, 2012

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    My Poem Called Please Go Away

    Please go away bad things I beg of you now. I wish to sleep but I don't know how I don't like these memories, or these pictures that I see I screamed and cried but no one ever came to save me Please go away and don't bring any more pain GO AWAY I feel like If you don't I will...
    silverstar415850 silverstar415850 18-21, F 5 Responses Feb 28, 2012

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    NOT Looking For Sympathy.. I Just Want All Victims 2 Know It Isn't Their Fault!

    This is something that I have never written about before. I may not have the strength to even get through this story because I choose not to think about it often but I also must share it.  I am not looking for your sympathy as I am past that point in my life but I am asking...
    fungirlmmm fungirlmmm 41-45, F 42 Responses Jul 5, 2008

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    A Little Boys Hell

    At the age of 4and5 i was molested by the piece of **** scumbag lowlife brother of my moms piece of **** lowlife scumbag second husband,who was at the sametime molesting my two older sisters.my mom was working most of thetime when this was going on and didn't know about it.when...
    Revengerage316 Revengerage316 36-40, M Oct 9, 2013

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    Will My Skin Ever Stop Crawling?

    Why is it that your face still haunts me during my most intimate moments? Why is it that when i close my eyes, your face is embedded in my skull? Why is it that you can go on with your life never thinking twice and i sit up countless nights from your haunting memory...
    writingmyrelease writingmyrelease 26-30, F 11 Responses Apr 27, 2010

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    I Thnik Its About Time That I Talk About This ,

    My story resembles many others, as in my abuser wasnt very creative with his words. "Dont tell anyone about our game, its a secret from everyone but me and you." "Dont be scared, you can trust me" "Youre a very pretty little girl" I remember so little from what happend to me...
    xxworthlessartist xxworthlessartist 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 2, 2011

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    My Older Sister Made Me Show Her My Body When I Was 10yo

    When I was 10 years old my parents left for a week to stay in hospital with my grandfather who was very ill nearly dying living real far away from us. During that week my older sister, then 14 years old treat me real bad, she would insist she was in charge of the house and had...
    box750 box750 31-35, M 3 Responses Jan 29, 2008

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    At Least Three Generations

    The sickness that runs in my family has been going on for years and years. I have heard from other family members about abuse from the man who was my great grandfather (dead before I was born), and stories of abuse from both of my grand parent on both sides. It's pretty sick to...
    graychylde graychylde 36-40, F 3 Responses Feb 24, 2012

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    Only A Toddler

    at that age it first happened my 13 year old bro and my father would rape me in the bum as hard as they could my bro was first he would put me on my stomach and force his penis in my bum and it hurt a lot i screamed and cried , and i bleed , but then it was my fathers turn his...
    wantodi wantodi 18-21, M 4 Responses Mar 26, 2013

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    How do I write this all down?

    This may take me hours to finish but it may only end up being a short read for you. My parents devorced pretty much the moment I was born. I don't know what it's like to have two parents in the same house or what a good Mom or Dad is. My Mom did try to 'save me or help me' but...
    ToBeHuman ToBeHuman 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 14

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    Just Another Boy

    I thiught I was just another boy like everyone in the world was exactly like me, the way she touched me made me do things I thought was normal the way she got other people involved. Let me first go back and tell you a little bit more about myself I'm now 20 can't talk to anyone...
    ben2333 ben2333 18-21, M Sep 26, 2013

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    Child Sexual Abuse Survivor Sleepover - No Sicko's Allowed!!!!!!

    Can somebody please just post something or respond??? I'm trying to find other people to identify with.. I'm tired of getting 400-some people reading my posts but nobody responds. I need somebody to share random **** with me. I'm one of those creatures that were abused as a child...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F 2 Responses Jul 18, 2013

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    Starbellied Sneeches and Those Without / Humpty Dumpty

    The only things I know The things opposite of love That held me and pet me And hurt me under a warm comfortable blanket Unlike the comfort of silence That took things apart And disappeared beneath Before emerging From darkness replaced by solidity Somehow allowed a small violent...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F Jun 25, 2013

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    Am I Really A Survivor?

    At the age of two both parents began sexually, physically, and mentally abusing me. They starved me i wasnt allowed to look up or anyone in the eyes. my voice was never to be heard. I was one of four children and for reasons I will never know I was the only one they touched. My...
    lovechell69 lovechell69 41-45, F 2 Responses Mar 13, 2011

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    I'm 39 and have been abused

    since I was most likely 2. Throughout the last decade or so, I have been wanting to reach out to other survivors, to tell them not to give up. There is HOPE....it will get easier. I finally decided to start a blog about healing. I want to give everyone hope by sharing my...
    JenuineHope JenuineHope 36-40, F Jan 16

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    I Am A Victim Of Sex Crime

    i am a victim of sex crime for a long time now and i have been for my whole life and now that i am pregnant now my stomach is hurting alot now i was raped in the month of august of this year
    sexcrimevictim sexcrimevictim 36-40, M Nov 4, 2013

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    Starting to Remember

    I feel lost at the moment...I never know what is coming - when the next memory will surface and what it will reveal...I have started to remember the years I had lost...i am at times terrified...suddenly for no reason i will feel confused, hurt, worthless, dirty...like i am...
    Flugelblues Flugelblues 31-35, F 9 Responses Oct 2, 2008

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    I Just Posted This On The "Electra Complex" group, but thought I'd share it with you all

    I was just looking up attracted to father or sex with father on the internet and it seems like most people with this problem are teens. That was when I had the hardest time not trying to have sex with him too, so I'm writing this. When I was a teen I didn't know why I was so...
    spidertorso spidertorso 31-35, F 1 Response Jul 8, 2013

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    I Need Help

    I was abused when I was a child, its something I know and accept and have lived with for more than half my life. Due to what happened to me as a child I find it hard to completely trust men and open up. I am very protective of myself and when it came to sex I wanted to pick...
    elle719 elle719 31-35 Oct 23, 2013

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    Loving It

    Not only did my three sisters and I have playfull sex all the time but from the age of five I had to share a bed every night with an older brother. Almost everynight I would wake up and find that my brother was sucking on my ----- , and I would lay there and let him.I had my...
    Drywallman31 Drywallman31 46-50, M 2 Responses Sep 2, 2013

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