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I Am a Closet Lesbian

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 4,260 People

    I Was Confused For So Long...

    I'm not one of those "I knew since I was 5 years old" lesbians...but I am gay. Very gay. And even though I'm closeted at the moment, I'm proud of who I am and I'm happy with being gay. It took a long time to even understand my sexuality, allow me to explain... When I was 12, a...
    shesaloverofthelight shesaloverofthelight 26-30, F 9 Responses Jul 18, 2013

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    I'm a Closeted Lesbian

    I'm not sure how I got to this point. It's like I have two different lives--two sets of friends, two sets of stories; everything split rather unequally to fit into 'gay' and 'normal'. Not straight. Normal. My mother is my idol, and she's the hardest-working, most beautiful...
    Harpertrap Harpertrap 18-21, F 175 Responses Dec 28, 2007

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    I’m Tired And I’m Coming Out!

    I have been a resident of the closet for a long time. I’m 22! So I have been hiding here for so many years. I used to consider it my comfort zone. A place where I can safely hide my ego from being hurt by homophobes who can’t understand. I am a lesbian. And a few months...
    deleted deleted 26-30 32 Responses Aug 26, 2012

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    I like her, we text each other till 4am on

    weekends. But she always deny she's into girls. I guess she's just too friendly.
    hildaq14 hildaq14 22-25, F Feb 20

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    I grew up in a family

    that is very religious. They are very anti-homosexual and would never accept me if they knew. I tried to be what they wanted me to be to the extent of marrying a man and having a son. I was miserable and my heart still ached to find the true soul mate I knew was out there. I...
    loanother loanother 36-40, F 6 Responses Jan 27, 2014

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    Some people know about it,

    but I guess that if I ever had a girlfriend, I would not introduce her to anyone but a very tight group of friends. Most times I am ashamed of myself. I always considered myself a very open person, but at the same time I wish I could be loved. People already hate me for who I...
    cursedswan cursedswan 26-30, F Jan 26

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    I am a friendly and decent Indian gay man

    living in Bangalore, India. I am 30 years old and well settled in life, with a good IT job and all the comforts in life. I am quite masculine and straight acting. As it's the norm in Indian society, my parents are actively trying for getting me married. I have told them several...
    homosapien84 homosapien84 26-30, M Feb 8

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    Is anyone going through the same thing

    as I am? Where I'm just hiding the fact I'm a lesbian.
    Melsilva Melsilva 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 2

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    I surprised her with a birthday card

    that I made for her (all by myself) and a gift card from her favorite online store. She was so very touched and overwhelmed by such a thoughtful gesture. She said "SO SWEET OF YOU" to me. Haha. Mission accomplished!
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F Jan 29

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    I've been feeling so very alone.

    I don't have anyone I can talk to about this. I'm terrified that even saying it out loud will wind up hurting people I care about. I just wish I had someone I could talk to with no judgement, no fear that it will come back to my family, someone who's been in this place before.
    bibliophileXlady bibliophileXlady 26-30 5 Responses Feb 1

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    I think I have come to a conclusion that

    if a girl is so comfortable with you, if she shares almost everything with you, doesn't mind acting silly and embarrassing themselves with you, then she is most probably not attracted to you. She likes you for sure, but she does not like "like" you. :
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F 2 Responses Feb 13

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    I have an amazing boyfriend

    and I care about him but I can't love him. I can't love him because I like girls, not boys... And I've tried and tried and tried so hard to make it work but to me it's just an act. an act I need to keep on playing because I know what my parents and my friends would say if it...
    infinite1994 infinite1994 18-21, F 6 Responses Jan 21, 2014

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    I'm A 17 Year Old Lesbian,

    I Glenda Have A GF Who Is Amazing I Love Her ;) But I Wish I Could Live A Normal Life, Just Like A Straight Couple Would, Get Married Earn Good Money :) Have Children. Just Chill Without Being Judged With My Girlfriend ): We Are Both Closet Lesbian. Our Families Are Pretty...
    K7R4N7LC K7R4N7LC 16-17, F 2 Responses 2 days ago

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    At Least I Can Be Proud Here, Where No One Knows Me.

    Isn't that sad? That we have to live in a worl where the only place we can be ourselves is when we are anonymous. I mean, of course Rose Donovan is not my real name. It is the name of one of my fictional characters. I could not out my real name on here for fear someone I knew...
    LonelySoul LonelySoul 18-21, F 75 Responses Jul 18, 2007

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    This is my first time

    even writing the words "I am a lesbian," so this is a big step for me. I think I've always known (very very deep down, so far down that the thought never even came into my head), but I had my "aha" moment about 7 months ago (in the beginning of my senior year of college). I...
    anonymous0987654 anonymous0987654 22-25, F 4 Responses Apr 4, 2014

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    I am using EP to slowly let people know

    that I am a lesbian..I have some barriers to being open...sigh..
    femsweety12 femsweety12 31-35, F 7 Responses Feb 17, 2014

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    So some of you suggested

    that I ask this girl to hang out with me. Okay guess what? I did. I mean, I didn't actually ask her, I suggested to her. I told her that maybe we should hang out sometime. And you know what? She told me that she didn't understand and said, and I quote "but we always hang out on...
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I'm only 16 and I'm already a closet lesbian.

    It started at school. I was 11 years old and I saw this beautiful girl across the room, and I felt something weird... I knew that something "weird" was happening. We became best friends and we were REALLY close. But when I was about 13 I decided it was time to let her go. I...
    wholeticia wholeticia 18-21, F Feb 22

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    My hse mate was giving me shots.

    I had abt 10 shots and she till wasn't letting me go. She wanted me to get drunk. So I texted my friend who was having a reunion to come save me. It was just jokingly but my friend left the reunion early and drove 30 min to my place just to save me. Aww, I think I like her. I...
    hildaq14 hildaq14 22-25, F 11 hrs ago

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    I'm Stuck In Closet-land..

    I'll start at the beginning.. I was a late bloomer in the love department. As a kid, I was always fine with just having fun whereas the other girls were more concerned with who liked who and which boys were the cutest. As much as I tried, I could not get into these conversations...
    ageyutsa ageyutsa 18-21, F 10 Responses Sep 26, 2011

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    I've told about 8 people about me.

    that includes only 1 family member. I plan on fully coming out to everyone my freshman year but I feel dumb when I can't even tell my sister or closer family members who I am.
    pansarecute pansarecute 13-15, F Feb 21

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    Not completely as some friends

    and my parents know and have been fantastic! However a lot of people and my family don't know. Anyone feel free to chat but only clean talk please
    Turnturn Turnturn 26-30, F 1 Response Feb 13

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    I have been struggling with this

    for a while but have come to the conclusion that I am definitely a lesbian. Although I have admitted this to myself I really don't feel ready to tell friends and family, it would be nice to speak to people in the same situation :)
    Ellie5293 Ellie5293 22-25, F 6 Responses Feb 4

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    Dont Know What To Do

    im a student at university and i am a cheerleader but there is a problem im a lesbian and no one knows and i dont know what to do
    amy1200 amy1200 18-21, F 45 Responses Sep 11, 2012

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    It is a wonderful feeling to be able to openly

    talk about my crush with my close friend whom I came out to a few weeks ago. And guess what, she said that she got a different vibe about my crush and kept asking me if the girl I like is really straight because normal "just friends" don't do what she does to me. I told her I...
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F 2 Responses Jan 26

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    A whatsapp conversation with her

    yesterday:- Me: it's okay, I still have other great and amazing people in my life like my mom, siblings, friends and you. ((I was trying to tell her that she's special)) Her: so I don't fall within the friends category? ((Not sure how to reply and said something stupid and...
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F 1 Response Feb 16

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    I'm a bi girl, still in the closet.

    I have a crush on my female teacher and I'm in love with my best friend. I'm selfharm because of all of this and I just want someone to talk to? Anyone? x
    katemicheal katemicheal 16-17, F 1 Response Feb 19

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    All I can say is... I'm in trouble.

    We have a family friend that we only see about once or twice a year, she is beautiful and a really nice and interesting person in general. She is also married with kids (****.) and happens to be about 20 years older than me. (Double ****.) I don't know what happened today but...
    Kayceyy Kayceyy 16-17, F 2 days ago

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    Willing To Come Out For The Sake Of Love

    I am an average looking girl who has a boring life. I've been hiding inside the closet and now I realized that I've been depriving myself the chance of loving and being loved by someone. I am an introvert and it's quite difficult for me to open up with anyone. I've never been in...
    strikien strikien 26-30, F 12 Responses Mar 9, 2012

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    Why Do People Assume You Choose To Be Gay Or Lesbian?

    Today during my Sociology class, we were talking about deviance and how a lot of psychologists believe that you're born 'bad'. Well, one of my stupid classmates, Ian, said, "I don't believe you can be born bad just as much as you can be born gay,"Well, that got me ticked off. Why...
    WeArePilots WeArePilots 18-21, F 25 Responses Dec 15, 2011

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    I dont trust girls who are attracted to

    me…like why? write me a 10 page paper with a legitimate thesis and valid points backing up your claim or you fake.
    OrangeCaramel OrangeCaramel 18-21, F 6 Responses May 21, 2014

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    I Am Almost Certain I'm Gay... But I Love My Boyfriend. Argh. Help.

    I'm in my mid-twenties and I'm really just starting to accept that I'm a lesbian. The signs were always there, and I suppose it's always been in the back of my head since I was little. Men really don't interest me. I LOVE them purely and fully. I even feel in love with them.I...
    PeaceLilyGirl PeaceLilyGirl 22-25, F 35 Responses Feb 21, 2012

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    i am in the closet and i cant come out anytime

    soon. i need a woman who can understand me and support me all the way. i crave intimacy, i wish i could fall in love. anyone interested in getting to know me more inbox me. i love honesty and sincerity.
    lesbewoman lesbewoman 26-30, F 2 Responses May 14, 2014

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    I told my friend today.

    I was the first whom she came out as a bisexual, so I thought she would understand me. I was right. she supports me. She told me: "whatever you need me or talk about something; I'm here for you. We are together in this". Was even better because she told me this face to face...
    OrangeCaramel OrangeCaramel 18-21, F 3 Responses May 27, 2014

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    So I'm confused. This girl

    either really likes me or she just happens to be one hell of an amazing friend. She surprised me with a special order of a new york cheesecake with lemon curd (not just a piece, but a whole cake) delivered straight to my workplace (coz she doesn't have my residential address...
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F 2 Responses Feb 7

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    I fell in love in love with a girl but cause

    I'm a girl I hide in fear and shame I try to keep a distance but every thing about her pulls me in she has the beauty an perfect soul I've always wondered if she knows Just say something or give me a hint But every day ends just as it begins With her thinking I just wanna be...
    watdoido2094 watdoido2094 18-21, F 4 Responses May 11, 2014

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    Not really......after all there isn't enough

    room for the two of us in my closet anyway. I guess I could get a bigger closet or just be out like I'm starting to be. Okay so long story, but basically I've discovered girls in a whole new way. All through my life I thought I was straight, normal, you know, not gay...
    ClaudNine ClaudNine 18-21, F 15 Responses Jul 17, 2014

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    My mom just found out

    that I am in love with one of my best friends.. She was fuming mad at me. She said that I better stop seeing her... I could only cry. I wanted to tell her that I am really gay and there is nothing I can do with it. I want to run away from home so I can be free.
    Mikey022 Mikey022 18-21, F 6 Responses Jul 20, 2014

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    Do any girls want to exchange pictures of

    themselves for some of my girlfriend?
    YouCanCallMeSir YouCanCallMeSir 18-21, M 2 Responses 3 days ago

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    I wish I could die right now.

    I swear it's the only way I can be happy. I have read these lines some where- "perhaps all pleasures are just reliefs". I want an immediate relief from this life. I love someone very much and she's leaving to carry on with her career to a place very very far away. She has become...
    blasphemy666 blasphemy666 22-25, F Feb 20

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    I tried so hard to like boys.

    But it just never really worked. When I tried dating guys, after a couple weeks I just couldn't do it anymore, I felt nothing towards them. Every time. I kept trying to go farther with guys sexually and I never felt aroused or good. When I lost my virginity to a guy it was awful...
    SavannaJade SavannaJade 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 25, 2014

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    Advice for coming out bi?

    Someone help please.. I hate being in the closet and I'm comfortable enough with myself now to come out but I'm scared.. Help xx
    katemicheal katemicheal 16-17, F 3 days ago

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    Couldn't Change Even If I Wanted Too

    It is scary to be yourself in a world full of hateful people. In a world full of people who don't understand that being gay isn't a choice. It isn't something that you decided. I don't wake up and think "You know what I'm feeling a little gay today." lol. It is something that I...
    EElena EElena 18-21, F 6 Responses Sep 25, 2013

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    The Closet Gets Cramped

    Hi, my name is Stephanie. :) I am a college student who only recently started coming to terms with my sexuality. I've known for as long as I can remember that I liked girls, but I always did my best to stifle the truth, and keep my feelings buried. This is a huge contributing...
    stephanie929 stephanie929 18-21, F 5 Responses Nov 17, 2013

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    I'm still confused but I guess I'm a 90% lesbian

    because I only wish to be in a relationship with a female. I just want someone that can relate to me and can keep up a conversation. Talking crap is also a form of entertainment :)
    Rachh13 Rachh13 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 7, 2014

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    I never reveal my affection towards a girl.

    I have strong urges to be with one but i never go for it. Its against my family and religion. I just want a girl who understands me and someone who's struggling with the same thing. I want to run away and be with a woman i can call my own. I dont want to come out. I just want to...
    Islandkween Islandkween 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 15

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    Alright girl, what is wrong with you?

    You just sent me a slo-mo video of you flipping your hair (or attempting to) because you said you just wanted to embarrass yourself again before sending me yet another selfie. You regretted it a few minutes later, apologized to me and said you probably did that because you were...
    whentostop whentostop 22-25, F Feb 20