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I Am a Manic Depressive

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 171 People

    I spin out of control ,

    even with medical treatment and medicine for over 20 yrs . I need help
    Bethlynn Bethlynn 46-50, F 2 Responses May 9, 2014

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    I Am On/ Off Depressed

    since i can remember i've always been very down on myself. I've always been very socially awkward but still had a lot of friends, yet i find flaws in my person all the time. I've recently had a three week spell off happiness and it was amazing but now, I am back to normality...
    gmac19 gmac19 18-21, M 2 Responses Jul 26, 2011

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    i am depressed again;

    as usual. i think what's worst than being all year round depressed is being depressed in one moment and then be manic and then be depressed again. coz you get to feel how it is to be happy, to have meaning in your life, to feel "normal" like the other people out there and then...
    bijouxnoir bijouxnoir 22-25, F Nov 24, 2014

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    Bipolar.............

    When I was younger, I was told I was manic depressive by one of my Dr's,  about 3 years ago, was said to be Bipolar.  I am having a hell of a time with this!  I take a medication which i can not stand to do and even still, sometimes maybe a week at a time, I am a...
    usmile4me usmile4me 31-35, F 1 Response Jan 29, 2008

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    ...every Aspect of My Life.

    Hi, I've been a manic depressive my entire life, even back to my earliest childhood. It becomes so embedded that it affects every aspect of my life, especially relationships. My marriage is crumbling to pieces because I terribly afraid of intimacy and even the mere thought of...
    Malfunc Malfunc 56-60 Jun 6, 2008

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    i feel the substanceflowing slowly like acid

    through my veinsmy bones turn numbthey don’t do what i have to do .soi swim from one thought to anotherits exhausting, if i could escape from gravity,from this cage of bones im infrom this monsters that i get along witha little script of mineits march i think. 
    RoobieCatenis RoobieCatenis 22-25, F May 20, 2014

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    Bipolar I

     ive had the diagnosis for almost two yrs ... bipolar d/o is a hard  mental illness to diagnose ...  because most people dont go to the dr when they are manic because it feels so good ...  i never knew how much went into bipolar d/o until i started educating...
    starstruck2xtrme starstruck2xtrme 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 24, 2007

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    I am a combination of manic

    depressive/anxiety/adhd
    midnightstarr midnightstarr 41-45, F 3 Responses Apr 22, 2014

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    Mental Facility # 1

    I just got diagnosed with Bi-Polar a few months back and I find it very surreal to be in a mental hospital.  My urge to commit suicide was strangling me every day for about 9 months after a terrible incident with an ex girlfriend (its in my profile).  My sleep patterns...
    TumYeto TumYeto 18-21, M May 4, 2008

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    So I go in to get my monthly dosage.

    .. the whole gambit of the cocktail prescribed by this doctor and that. (all with a different set of initials following their name) The pharmacist was rather rude, and it took about 35 seconds of this rudeness to **** me off to the point where I started to get that.... hmmm...
    JLBetts JLBetts 46-50, M Nov 1, 2014

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    My Best Friend

    My best friend died four months ago. Since then I have become worse. Thoughts go racing through my head; jumping from one subject to another I'm a nonstop party girl, constantly running around. I hate being home. Because I'm not happy there. I do too many wild or risky...
    km101306 km101306 16-17, F 1 Response Feb 20, 2008

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    love aint the must powerful people like me.

    . live between the flames and the heavens we can be in glory but we are still burning .. we live wonders and it still hurts you may fully love me but as with the weather love cant stop this. love cant stop the snow love cant stop the acid love won’t suck the demon off...
    RoobieCatenis RoobieCatenis 22-25, F Aug 15, 2014

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    Ehh, Well.

    This is what doctors and psychologists have told me I have, anyway. For awhile, they thought I had bipolar disorder because my mom had it, and I guess it's a hereditary gene. Woo hoo, lucky me. I have my highs and my downs, like everyone, though my highs tend to be a lot higher...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Dec 30, 2011

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    Out Of Depression And Understanding Mania

    I have a blog on mania and depression with personal experience and daily handling of different states. visit: http://foxonline.blogs.experienceproject.com/
    foxonline foxonline 26-30, F Oct 17, 2010

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    I have been for as long

    as I can recall, only I was not diagnosed until my life took one final (we thought it to be final) nosedive crisis. It was then that I was diagnosed and although I had never heard of the term outside of a Jimi Hendrix tune....it fit. I am a survivor of 2 suicide attempts (and...
    bbush69 bbush69 41-45, M 1 Response Sep 10, 2014

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    Its Daily and Its Been 12 Years

    I'm 36 I work out every day (but with rock and roll on my shuffle otherwise i wouldnt even bother going to the gym), when i'm there i'm angry, i don't look at anybody nor speak with anybody, when i leave to work i'm angry and depresesed its really worrisome because...
    treblue treblue 36-40 1 Response Jun 4, 2009

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    My Boyfriend Is Manic Depressive, How Can I Help Him?

    My boyfriend is manic depressive I don't know how I can help him. But I love him so. We are now a happy couple for more then 7 years. The first time when I saw him this was when we knew each other 1 year. While he was in the military, he just broke with the military and went...
    LittleAnt LittleAnt 31-35, F 3 Responses Jan 31, 2009

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    It really gets old honestly.

    Medicine, therapy, people asking why i'm so emotional all of the time. It just really gets old. Anyone else know this feeling? How it really feels to even have this?
    2grunge4u 2grunge4u 13-15, F 1 Response Nov 1, 2014

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    Never The Same

    First I'm mad sad pist irrated upset hatefull for weeks. Then I'm happy laughing ok most of my life I hate ppl and wana die I love all people very Into animals and helping all. Respect all was raised with nothing so want something but my moods hurt me anyone like me out there
    Hatefull1 Hatefull1 26-30 Feb 4, 2012

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    I battle with manic depression,

    I have done for about 13 years, I have antidepressants, none seem to work, I've tried suicide, so I have just resigned to let some one kill me! I live in hope anyway, but basically I don't try to do anything anymore! The doctors have given up on me and so have I!
    Seany83 Seany83 31-35 1 Response Jan 21, 2014

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    Bipolar.............

    When I was younger, I was told I was manic depressive by one of my Dr's,  about 3 years ago, was said to be Bipolar.  I am having a hell of a time with this!  I take a medication which i can not stand to do and even still, sometimes maybe a week at a time, I am a...
    usmile4me usmile4me 31-35, F Jan 29, 2008

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    I am as blank as a new tab window on a PC.

    Just a pale white blank page of nothing. That's how I feel right now at 9:58 pm. Do I dare think it should be any different. Have you ever felt like a blob of nothing. No shape or form just nothing. It's the holidays and tomorrow I am getting Christmas cruise tickets for us and...
    bamagrl54 bamagrl54 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 4, 2013

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    This Is Very Difficult to T...

    This is very difficult to talk about.  But I get where I can hardly move in life and the end of life seems the best option.  It does not matter what good thing maybe happening I am still depressed.  People saying just think happy thoughts and do positive things...
    allofus allofus 46-50, M 4 Responses May 13, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    So... I was diagnosed at 17 when I almost had a melt down in my sophomore English class. A lot of people think being "bipolar" means you have mood swings and that's it. It's not...
    LadyApfel LadyApfel 22-25, F Apr 8

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    My mind is badly fractured I hate the body I am in My thoughts shall destroy me As I mutilate my skin I'd rather change myself Than never live at all But it seems that change won...
    SkullRoseInsignia SkullRoseInsignia 16-17, T Mar 28

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    Avoided an episode and helped myself back into self care!!! Remission here I come.
    lalalapolkadotsmmbop lalalapolkadotsmmbop 18-21, F Apr 1

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    ''GROUNDHOG DAYS'' Waking up again To the same old thing To the same old songs To the same old pain Cocooned in this world Where every single thing hurts Bones broken up inside...
    Juri0902 Juri0902 31-35, F Mar 31

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    ''LOCUS VALLEY'' Famously unknown Elusive and dismantled A correspondence school behind All the world, the darkest glass I don't need it, I don't fear it I don't need it, I don't...
    Juri0902 Juri0902 31-35, F Mar 31

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    Love getting a mani and pedi. Feels so nice. I'm feeling like it's a girlie pink kind of day to celebrate spring....even if it is cold and rainy outside.
    llevame llevame 41-45, F 1 Response Apr 8

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    Im a young nympho. And I gave my Virginity to a man whom i didnt love and eventually i started to crave more so i did is to have f*** buddies and i did sex with them back and forth...
    Msorpheus20 Msorpheus20 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 12

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    The day was Sunday July 2012,1 am (In the wee hours drifting into a light sleep)I heard a helpless whimpering of a person.My "relative" a very tall slender man frantically swung...
    walkingwarrior walkingwarrior 26-30, F 1 Response Apr 13

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    I wrote this song for myself and all those who are struggling and also for those who don't understand what we go through. Hold On Intro Manic depressive disorder or so it’s...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Mar 30

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    I'm no success story. I've been a squanderer , drifter, and even a bum, but I am a fortunate person. I had an insane childhood; a few years as a prince who was doted upon, and...
    puck61 puck61 51-55, M 10 Responses Apr 17

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    Biggest face palm moment in my life! So I was talking someone on here and they said "Your cute. Want to be my boyfriend?" I was like "Thanks but I am not into guys." Then they...
    AllTheEmotions AllTheEmotions 18-21, M 1 Response Apr 1

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    Well not so secretly to those EP members who know me. It is likely manic depression because it comes over me in waves. I can be high, excitable, fun and crazy for a period of time...
    GoddessBluefox GoddessBluefox 36-40, F 5 Responses 8 hrs ago

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    And I ask, "When I did I become this shameful thing?" When did I stop caring about social obligations? When did I start turning people down who need to talk? When did I stop being...
    DepressedDemigod DepressedDemigod 22-25, F Apr 2

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    For many years I just do not know where to go ...everywhere I go I feel I'm rejected and persecuted and shunned by everyone .... I just do not know where to go ... At the moment I...
    restlessuk restlessuk 31-35, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    For many years I just do not know where to go ...everywhere I go I feel I'm rejected and persecuted and shunned by everyone .... I just do not know where to go ... At the moment I...
    Powerlesss Powerlesss 31-35, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    I bipolar and when manic I'm the life of the life of the party. I've been told when manic I'm fine form.
    deleted deleted 26-30 Mar 26

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    Spring time usually gets me manic. I am kinda manic right now. I stopped taking meds bc I wanna control it but it's so hard :(((
    piperweant piperweant 18-21, F 3 Responses Apr 9

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    A WOMAN I LOVED I was a lifelong depressive man who just started at fifty on a recovery plan. it was only medication, but I was at the first station. I didn't know the path my...
    paulie138 paulie138 66-70, M Mar 25

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    I'm so shocked and traumatised by the treatment I had by the mental health professionals in Middlesbrough ... What happened to me was beyond my expectations and imaginations and I...
    Powerlesss Powerlesss 31-35, F Mar 25

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    I'm so shocked and traumatised by the treatment I had by the mental health professionals in Middlesbrough ... What happened to me was beyond my expectations and imaginations and I...
    Soullesss Soullesss 31-35, F Mar 25

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    I'm so shocked and traumatised by the treatment I had by the mental health professionals in Middlesbrough ... What happened to me was beyond my expectations and imaginations and I...
    restlessuk restlessuk 31-35, F 2 Responses