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I Am a Recovering Addict

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 647 People

    Life After Drugs

    I have not used inover twenty years and im crazy as ever. Ive seen miracles like they told me about in meetings. I feel like an old athelete that could still play the game but chooses not to. I have never had urges or cravings to use. Ive seen people die that started recovery the...
    gpart gpart 56-60, M Jun 22, 2013

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    NOT What You Think

    I'm not addicted to any substances. I've never drank booze, and I only tried weed once. I stole it from my brother when I was a teen, and I had a seizure from it. I learned quick, fast, and in a hurry that drugs are NOT for me! I've never gambled, and I am not addicted to sex. I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Aug 27, 2013

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    Getting Started

    surely someone should seen it coming. i am not only addicted to drugs, but yesterday my addictive personality got me all caught up in this site. i was so excited and so relieved and probably even a little bit desperate that i just knew i was going to find all the answers to...
    yummmy5555 yummmy5555 46-50, F 1 Response May 4, 2013

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    I have 4 months sober today!

    :) If you're reading this and having a hard time, just keep fighting! You can do it and it's all worth it! One day at a time!
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 8

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    I Really Understand Now..

    Everybody has an addiction, and most people have multiple. Human beings are all substance abusers and addicts to a fault. Pick your poison.. coke? ecstacy? sex? food? we're all hooked. and through the whole getting sober process I've really started to understand that it isn't so...
    katiekayy katiekayy 18-21, F 3 Responses Dec 7, 2009

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    Everchanging

    I am a 27 year old female with 4 children. I have been clean almost eleven months now. I started using when I was nine. The first time I went to treatment I was twelve. My mother was always wanting to send me to treatment and she did 7 times. I managed to stay clean for a year...
    britbaize britbaize 26-30 4 Responses Jun 18, 2010

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    Painful Road, Gratitude Skies

    I just celebrated two years sober and since beginning my third year, it's been a painful, yet gratifying road. While using, it was a downward spiral of sickness, lying, stealing, violence, even jail. I'm a 24 year old woman, who honestly should be six-feet under. The first 30...
    LenaDoll LenaDoll 26-30, F 23 Responses Oct 11, 2012

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    I'm Sick And Tired Of Being Sick And Tired, Still

    So I've cleaned up my act and quit all the drugs and most of the sex. Yet I am still sick and tired. My parents run my life and only let me go to a few meetings, only let me hang out with few people, and say I need more friends that are girls even though I try to explain I mingle...
    Kidd12 Kidd12 16-17, F 4 Responses Jun 9, 2012

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    It Gets Better!

    When I think of those early days in recovery I am amazed that I managed to make it through. I was so full of guilt and shame. I wanted to end my life at times. The meeting I went to read " The Promises" and I just kept clinging to them. I want a life worth living! Early on the...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 13, 2013

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    Relapse?

    It hasnt been that long that I have been off of drugs, and honestly at first I liked living the sober life but now I cant stand it. I sit and think and all I think about is getting high. I just want to feel numb again. I have had a big loss in life not long ago, and I think that...
    imperfectbeauty imperfectbeauty 18-21, F 7 Responses May 24, 2012

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    Rounding The Bend

    ok here goes. my story is very intense. i really dont even know where to start. i am a ten year veteran of this crack war and im finally ready to lay my pipe down. believe me the devil aint makin it easy. so i know im on the right page. For a while i have been moving toward...
    yummmy5555 yummmy5555 46-50, F May 3, 2013

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    I was twelve the first time I tried pills.

    Some boy at school offered them to me and I was curious. I took them and it felt great. I had always been the good girl and I got teased for being so innocent. Doing pills made me feel grown up. It was exciting. So I bought some more and tried two that time. I got really sick...
    emj1349 emj1349 18-21, F 4 Responses Feb 25

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    Prescription Pills

    I'd been an alcoholic since 2007, when I got mixed up with the wrong kids in high school. I was sneaking out to drink and get high almost every night throughout high school. In 2010 I lost 3 friends because of drugs and alcohol. My doctor prescribed me some anti-anxiety...
    genevieve144 genevieve144 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 1, 2013

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    1 Month 5 Days.

    Today I have one month and 5 days without pills. I feel pretty good. I feel stronger mentally, physically and emotionally than I ever have. Of course life still happens and things are never perfect. There are things in my life right now I'm struggling with like I said life is...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 2 Responses Nov 14, 2013

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    Is there anyone who has some time clean

    who could please talk to me right now please
    Bransicle Bransicle 26-30, F 2 Responses Jan 5

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    I Have Been Clean For a Month

     Yep thats right I have been clean for a month. I was in rehab for that month. But I had to leave for medical reasons. After my heath is better then I am going back to rehab. and staying there for another couple of months and hopefully stay clean the rest of my life. I can't...
    XLunaXLovegoodX XLunaXLovegoodX 22-25, F 9 Responses Jun 18, 2008

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    41 Days...

    I want to tell my story. I'm just not sure where to start. That song "let's start at the very beginning, a very good place to start" just keeps running thru my head over and over lol. So here it goes. My life started out normal, I never realized there was anything abnormal about...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 3 Responses Nov 21, 2013

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    What Do I Do Now??

    I have been clean of crack and heroin for nearly a year now, after spending nearly 15 years on it. The only problem is, that now, I have become very shy, and I don't know how to communicate and interact with society. I find it very difficult to start conversations and when I do...
    missjft missjft 31-35, F 3 Responses May 30, 2013

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    It Hit Me Real Hard Today

    I guess I'll put this story in this group because it made me remember what could have been.  At work yesterday I took a call from a hospital icu notifing a couple Drs of a death.  When they told me the time of death it was like hours passed before them notifing the...
    darlene darlene 41-45, F 5 Responses Oct 9, 2007

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    How Opiates Flipped My Life Upside Down (part 2)

    I was now a freshman in college,..... and had the world in my hands. freshman year was an absolute blast. What i did in high school, i did ten fold in college. i drank life a fish....didn't matter what i had to do the next day...because i knew i would get it done...and the...
    BrokenResurrection BrokenResurrection 22-25, F 1 Response Jan 24, 2012

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    Jan. 22. New Energy Coming.

    Fun becomes fun, love becomes love, and life becomes worth living. And we become grateful. —Beyond Codependency (by Melody Beattie) There is a new energy, a new feeling coming into our life. We cannot base our expectations about how we will feel tomorrow, or even a few...
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F Jan 23

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    They Call Us Generation Rx...

    Sep. 7th is my day... the day things aligned and i decided being a slave to opiates was no longer going to be part of my life. Some say it's a disease others dispute whether it is or not, i personally don't know. I do know that in my path of destruction and extreme selfish...
    andrw24 andrw24 26-30, M 6 Responses Nov 18, 2011

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    I am 6 mths clean off pills currently.

    Probably the hardest thing I have ever done. I have tried several times to stay clean but am confident this time it will stick. I'm sick of being sick and wasting my time energy and money on something that literally makes me a monster. Each day is a struggle but I have to keep...
    jennayluv jennayluv 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 5

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    It Been 20 Mos.

    I quit drinking ,smoking, over sugar, cheating. For my partner. So I could take care of her. It's been good . I was a severe black out alcoholic and was about to get diabeities. I was220 5'5. Still having memory problems. But I weigh 155 I and not so tiered. Was getting a better...
    Faithinyoumy1 Faithinyoumy1 31-35 5 Responses Nov 8, 2013

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    I Am Not A Shame

    I have wonderful stories as a child I was loved by some of the best parents a boy can have as a teenager they tried everything they could. i have so many secret that come and find me at night . you wont find my story in some fancy book but in the back ally's of a small town in...
    Joelaf Joelaf 26-30, M Sep 18, 2013

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    1 Year Down

    I've told exactly on person about this, but felt the need to put it out there tonight. I quit approximately 1 year ago. I was addicted to opiates (pain pills) and had been for awhile. It cost me my job, a wife, and everything in between. My addiction came on gradual (as most do...
    amodelcitizen amodelcitizen 36-40, M 5 Responses Dec 14, 2012

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    I Was Shooting Up In the End!

    I HAD BEEN A DRUG ADDICT FOR 20 SOME YEARS...... AND IN THE END OF MY ADDICTION I HAD GOTTEN SO BAD IN THE END I DID THE 2 THINGS I ALWAYS SAID I WOULD NEVER   DO!  SHOOT UP AND HERION...... THE SICK THING IS I WAS SHOOTING UP HERION AND CRACK AT THE SAME TIME...
    EEYORE6 EEYORE6 36-40, F 6 Responses Feb 3, 2008

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    20 Days....This Last Week Has Been Rough!

    Today I have 20 days without taking a pill. Its been hard. This last week seems to have been really hard. I have been wanting a vicodin so bad. I haven't taken any but I've definitely wanted to. I've been really angry. I'm angry because I want it and I'm angry because I want it...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 4 Responses Oct 29, 2013

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    Pill Popper

    When I was a freshman in college, my mother decided to move my sister and I from Ohio to Pennsylvania. She moved us away from our friends and family. Now, my sister was always better at making friends than I was. So I didn't know what to do with myself. Granted, my mother didn't...
    MikiJNiki MikiJNiki 18-21, F 3 Responses Nov 11, 2012

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    Learning To Live - Minutes At A Time

    Addiction had taken me so far down the scale that I was a broken shell of a human being. I felt so broken that I didn't even feel that there was enough left of me to be fixed. I could hardly talk, all I could feel was dispair and desperation and I couldn't even begin to fathom...
    SereneK SereneK 22-25, F 3 Responses Jul 24, 2012

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    Questions About Pain Control....

    Let's say hypothetically that my husband gets clean and is able to stop using prescription pain pills...... then what? What does he do for the pain in his neck from his injury that started this whole mess in the first place? I feel like its no good for him to seek treatment for...
    Lori1118 Lori1118 31-35, F 1 Response Oct 18, 2013

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    Sober Birthday...

    Yesterday I celebrated my birthday sober. For the first time in about 19yrs. Today I have 45 days sober. 45 days with no pills. I had a very nice birthday. I took my niece and my daughter out to brunch and then to a movie. We had a wonderful time and I found out it is possible...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 3 Responses Nov 24, 2013

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    Happier!

    My deep sadness is finally going away! I have stopped using my drug of choice for 3 weeks now and 1 month before. It has been a real struggle and I consider giving up every day. However happiness is a great motivator to continue. Also I feel more in control and a little better...
    unAmigo unAmigo 31-35, M 1 Response May 31, 2013

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    Still So Sad

    i had a lot of stress in my life, my husband lost a good job, went back to school, had no money, never saw him, raising my son pretty much by my self for 3 years.  i started taking pain medicine to stop stress, but instead i stopped caring about everything, family...
    kate08 kate08 36-40 2 Responses Sep 11, 2008

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    Junkie Love

    junkie boy, junkie girl junkie boy is sick junkie girl turns a trick and junkie boy gets his fix junkie boy gets well junkie girl lays down junkie boy is do'in scores all over town Junkie girl wakes up and there's her ol' man with a little bit of food and a rig in his hand with a...
    r3a7n13 r3a7n13 36-40, M 2 Responses Jul 14, 2012

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    Too Long To Disclose It All Now!

    I have four kids and right about now is feeding time!! But I do have a long story I would like to share and will when kiddies are sleeping tonight. Am really at my WITS end when it comes to chucking it and need something to fill the space when the drugs are taken away!!? I'm...
    bertybassett1488 bertybassett1488 31-35, F Aug 22, 2013

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    I've been sober for two years now.

    Although most people call me a success story, especially at such a young and vulnerable age, I still crave my drug of choice (cocaine) every waking moment. I may be young, but I've lived more-- seen more, than people three times my age. And even though I've cleaned my life up a...
    breanastrang breanastrang 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 22

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    Adams Life Story.

    Eventually, my denial system just broke down and with this collapse I experienced a painful and overwhelming vision of the truth. I guess that this is what happened at the cemetery. I saw myself dead or in jail and this really frightened me. I was broken and I surrendered...
    surfsup76 surfsup76 31-35, M 1 Response Jan 21, 2012

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    I Am Not A Shame

    I have wonderful stories as a child I was loved by some of the best parents a boy can have as a teenager they tried everything they could. i have so many secret that come and find me at night . you wont find my story in some fancy book but in the back ally's of a small town in...
    Joelaf Joelaf 26-30, M 1 Response Sep 18, 2013

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    Victory In Jesus

     I have smoked cocaine/crack for over 20 years.  Many times I tried to stop and I even went to rehabilitation centers.  It didn't help.  I would be smoking, praying, singing gospel and reading the Bible all at the same time because I know that only Jesus can...
    onlybelieve onlybelieve 46-50 5 Responses Oct 4, 2008

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    'Thought It Wouldn't Happen to Me'

    I took my first alcoholic drink with my mother when I was 11,?.  When I was 15, I met my high school sweet heart...whom I (we)partied alot with friends. Drinking to blackouts was the rage then.  I remeber I got so drunk once when I was 16 that my boyfreind and a friend...
    Bubbles27 Bubbles27 26-30, F 3 Responses Sep 30, 2007

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    Am I Being Selfish?

    So I have been clean for almost 4 years. I was mainly a meth addict but dabbled in basically everything that got me high. I have a serious boyfriend of almost three years who is very supportive of me. His sister is a currently active in her addiction and it is soooo hard for me...
    Ihopesomedayimnotcrazy Ihopesomedayimnotcrazy 22-25 1 Response Dec 20, 2012

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    It's Hard Everyday

    I have been an addict almost all my life.  I took my first drink at age 11.  From there things just progressed.  I used something everyday.  Alcohol, pills (lots of them), weed, coke, acid, heroin...hell it might be easier just to list what I never did at...
    darlene darlene 41-45, F 31 Responses Sep 3, 2007

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    20+ Yrs Of Using Drugs

    I started smoking pot in High School then I made the drinking age of 19 and drank with my friends. It became such a problem that I didn't graduate with my friends and had to come back and graduate the following year. I grew up Mormon , so I quit for 6 months and when on a mission...
    ttwilson65 ttwilson65 46-50, M 2 Responses Jul 25, 2012

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    I have 61 days without pills today.

    It's not easy all the time and there are still rough days but I'm here. I never realized how much time I spent on pills. Time looking for them. Time thinking about them. I just never really realized how much of my life pills consumed. Since I've quit I've found myself really...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 1 Response Dec 11, 2013

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    Am I Doing Something Wrong? Advice Please...

    When I was thirteen, I started occasionally getting stoned, drinking, the normal teenage curiousity, and like the usual story, I was led down a bad path, I started to experiment a lot more, and care a lot less about school and family ect. I loved breaking the rules, I dropped...
    mindfuck mindfuck 18-21 2 Responses Aug 7, 2008

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    24 Days :)

    Today I have 24 days without any pills. I am feeling pretty good today. Its definitely true, its not easy but its worth it. I am now enrolled in college and will start classes in January. Something I tried but could not stick to when I was eating vicodin like candy. The vicodin...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 3 Responses Nov 2, 2013

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    I used to use meth and heroin habitually.

    I'm 4 years clean as of last month. A big part of this was avoiding the people I used with. I've heard it said, "A friend who gives you drugs isn't a friend." I couldn't disagree more. These were wonderful people and very loving relationships, but they were not healthy for...
    OfFansAndFlames OfFansAndFlames 22-25 8 hrs ago

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    Day 47

    I have 47 days without pills. Not without stress tho. My living situation is causing me a lot of stress right now. About 5 months ago I moved and put myself, my kids and their father my EX husband under one roof. I had lost my job, he had lost his, it was convenient and cheaper...
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F Nov 27, 2013

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    30 Days

    I have 30 days without pills today! I would have never thought id be here. Im so glad I am tho. There are hard days but its all worth it.
    shannonshart shannonshart 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 9, 2013

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    My Journey Along The Path

      I am a Recovering Addict. My journey to today is a long and winding road and I am sure that true of most people on this site. It has up till now taken 20 years of my life and caused me pain and suffering. i am pleased that I am now committed to my long term recovery and...
    recoverycoach recoverycoach 46-50, F Sep 6, 2013

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    The Tunnel

    The darkest part of recovery, is feeling desperately alone. You don't know it in the beginning, but it's the loneliest time of your life. I refer to it as the tunnel. It's lonlier than the drugs, it's darker than the lies, and the deciet, and the countless coverups..and you're...
    StainedHands StainedHands 18-21, F 6 Responses Apr 14, 2013

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    Give Me Strength.

    U you I haven't had a lot of trouble quitting this time I think it s cause I had someone who understood. Theirs been a lot of stress in the house and relationship . The smell of smoke would make me sick. But today I had a n old feeling of Mmm I want one. I didn't but it getting...
    Faithinyoumy1 Faithinyoumy1 31-35 Nov 8, 2013

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    Hopeless And Dopeless To Happy Joyous And Free

    I have been a sober member of Alcoholics Anonymous for over eight years now. My life is filled with friends, family, work, God, love, and hope. This was not always the case for me, in fact it is a miracle to be happy today. I grew up in an upper middle class family with good...
    Jessibelle Jessibelle 41-45, F 1 Response Nov 18, 2009

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    Related Experiences

    I'm not even sure how to put into words how I'm feeling at the moment. I have been with Ryan for 6 years and have been friends with him for 10 years. He injects meth multiple times...
    AudieM13 AudieM13 22-25, F Mar 21

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    Has anyone ever loved someone recovering from heroin? My ex and I broke up recently because he's lost total sense of himself. He has been clean for 2 years (14 months of that in a...
    Girlonthemoon92 Girlonthemoon92 22-25 1 Response Apr 7

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    I was addicted to crack for about 5 yrs, been clean for 8 yrs now, quit cold turkey not easy withdrawls were massive but I did t!!!!!
    mcveypamela199 mcveypamela199 36-40, F 1 Response