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I Am a Recovering Alcoholic

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 706 People

    Meaningless. I am more

    than alive today. I am more than just "sober" today. I am more than I was so many years ago. This is the result of the steps for me, where people drinking and the sight of alcohol means nothing. Most 12 steppers fear the outside world I don't. I didn't see "drunk people" this...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Dec 26, 2013

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    Safe House? Mark Burchell

    Farmington Hills, Mich. - Recovery homes are supposed to be safe havens for addicts to heal after they get out of rehab. But instead of helping addicts rebuild their lives, a local sobriety leader is accused by several women of preying on them. He’s been hailed as a saint in...
    TheePanther TheePanther 70+ May 9, 2013

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    Today I decided that it is time

    for me to honestly and genuinely start accepting the success in my life. I am someone who has always worked hard in an effort to overcome what I felt like were handicaps in my life. At the very same time I have always done everything in my power to avoid the attention that seems...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses a week ago

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    Mistakes, You've Made A Few (A tip of the hat to Lilt and ccneb)

    Ruminating on your errors and where you got it wrong, is not the same thing as learning from them. If fact it's a sure fire way to set up momentum to repeat those same mistakes later on. Guilt is a very attractive and dynamic vibratory energy. The disease gets very excited about...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 13, 2013

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    Don't see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain't it grand the wind stopped blowin'?

    KARLA BRADA MURDER VICTIM BY AA MEMBER   Click on to view the Karla Brada Video Story-   http://youtu.be/uABc5vUGuGY   1st video-   http://youtu.be/nua3eekMYl   I am Monica Richardson, the Founder of a grass roots movement to Make AA Safer. We took direct action to do so...
    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 70+ Mar 14, 2013

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    To Those It May Concern...

    This is in fact an exact copy of an answer I put in someone else's topic, but I felt it 'good' enough to be posted as a separate entry...  First a joke: You know what they call an alcoholic who ran out of booze? A man with a drinking problem... Okay. I started drinking...
    jimmyrudyjump jimmyrudyjump 51-55, M 13 Responses Mar 30, 2011

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    actually, I choose to call myself a child of

    the living God, that is in recovery from alcohol. I refuse to identify myself with the sin I used to commit. I know if i drank again, I would be back in the same sad state I was in before I quit drinking, over 25 years ago. With the help of sponsors, accountability partners...
    jesusfreak247 jesusfreak247 61-65 Apr 19

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    Dancing Evergreen

             I checked the number on the incoming call vibrating in my hand. It was a call I was required, by law, to answer twenty-four hours a day seven days a week. I practice walking meditation and breathing exercises around an old historic State Penitentiary long since...
    gsparky22 gsparky22 41-45, M 9 Responses Nov 5, 2012

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    I am at a stage of confusion,

    just started using antabuse as my drinking parten is now affecting my work.Work to me is the only thing I cannot afford to loose because everytime I'm and down almost out,I can always build from that. I still have my wife and children a home though still renting but lots of depts...
    Luqa2 Luqa2 41-45, M 5 Responses Mar 16

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    Holding Your Hands Up.......

    Having gone through myself the devastation that the alchohol illness can cause, I find it horrible when i hear people blaming the person themselves for the pain that they cause while they are drinking. Yes it is ultimately down to the person themselves to stop drinking, but its...
    emmaB7 emmaB7 31-35, F Nov 23, 2012

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    AA Doesn't Work For Atheists/Agnostics

    I recently decided that, after twenty years of heavy, almost daily drinking, and an incident that nearly cost me everything, I needed to quit my unhealthy ways and get sober for the first time in my entire adult life.  Though I had quit drinking for brief periods before...
    RedRover RedRover 36-40, F 55 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    Well I feel good today.

    My side isn't hurting any longer, my anxiety is lessening thanks to the pills. I feel a sense of calm and determination. I think I'll start going out the house more often. This is good.
    IloveLife14 IloveLife14 31-35, F 11 Responses Jan 24

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    As much as it is scary to admit,

    sobriety is becoming a very enjoyable experience for me. These last few weeks have been incredibly challenging but I have survived them and I have come out of the experiences in a far more solid place in terms of my sobriety and my ability to enjoy my new life. Two weeks ago I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 4 Responses Jun 28

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    Alcoholism Can Be Cured Despite A.A.'s Contention To The Contrary

    By Dr. Arthur H. Cain From the September 19, 1964 Saturday Evening Post. An expert charges that Alcoholics anonymous has become a dogmatic cult that blocks medical progress and hampers many members' lives. It is time we made a thorough investigation of Alcoholics Anonymous in the...
    TheCrabbyAngel TheCrabbyAngel 41-45 7 Responses Mar 31, 2013

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    My 20th wedding anniversary is in a few months

    and I have been sober for just over half that time. Does this mean I have made amends for the despicable things I did to my wife in the nearly ten years I was drinking? Not even close. We were having dinner at our favourite restaurant last night, chatting about this and that...
    grasser grasser 56-60, M 4 Responses Jun 28

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    And I want to thank my gf

    for it she's my whole life
    javies99 javies99 13-15, M Jul 17

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    7 months! I can't believe I have been sober

    for 7 months! In fact in the beginning I just assumed I wouldn't make it. It has been an insanely wild ride and there are still a ton of challenges moving forward but I am really enjoying sobriety and wouldn't trade my new life for anything! Thanks to all my friends for...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Apr 11

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    I have spent my entire life seeking

    and yearning for only one thing… relief from the pain of my horrific childhood. I have always fought alone and tried to do the best I could, always dreaming that one day I would finally feel free of the terribly heavy burdens. Now I fight with the support of those who care...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 13

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    9 months! It doesn’t

    even seem real. This month has been a lot of struggle with my self-esteem. I don’t at all feel worthy or deserving on a regular basis, which allows me to slip into pretty deep dark spells in my head. I have spent 25 years being abused or abusing myself and I am finding it...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Jun 11

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    My addiction cost me my health,

    at 24 my liver has failed and I've nearly died. I now have a degenerative bone condition secondary to alcohol abuse and am looking at a hip replacement. I wish I could have appreciated my good health before and known that the consequences to my actions would be so severe.
    itealist itealist 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 7

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    Well 3 months sober now

    and today I am so proud of myself going to bed soon just to end the day had hopefully a one off day god I could have killed for a drink and just don't know why only thing I can put it down to is Christmas associated with drinking and eating stayed away from works Christmas party...
    Steveat10 Steveat10 46-50, M 7 Responses Dec 23, 2013

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    The New 12 Steps

    RARELY HAVE they seen a person who has thoroughly followed their path. Those who do recover are usually people who have recognized AA as a dangerous religious cult, and will not give themselves completely to AA's fanatical program. The AA Cult is constituted primarily of men and...
    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 70+ 2 Responses Mar 25, 2013

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    I have spent the last 4 years battling to come

    to terms with the fact that I can never drink alcohol again. went to rehab, very hard thing I've ever done, faced my demons and found out who I really am. I've been battling the booze for the last 36 years and at this moment in time I am currently 15 months clean. So if anyone...
    kinkyman23 kinkyman23 46-50, M 4 Responses Apr 26

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    3 Months Sober!!!!!!!

    !!! I have somehow managed stay sober for 3 months…  How? I don’t really know. Perhaps. It was luck??  No ******* way….   Actually, to be completely honest, I have fought like hell and accepted an enormous amount of support in order to maintain my sobriety.   Sobriety...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 9 Responses Dec 11, 2013

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    I found out about A.A.

    as the result of the court system A big "no no" in the fellowship and it wasn't about some traffic offense. I ended up in rehab and as a result of the group therapy I started to experience a total cessation of emotion and almost all thought with no identification of "me" at all...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response May 12

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    January 19, 1982. That was the day I stopped

    drinking …. and walked into my first AA meeting. 32 years later, I know I'm a very different person. Actually, I've known that for quite a few years. These days, the time flies between one year and the next. But, in the early days, time just crawled. It was painfully...
    AllAboutLaffs AllAboutLaffs 61-65, M 9 Responses Jan 19

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    Today Is My Birthday.

    Today, I am 34. Today I am at work instead of having taken the day off to drink. Today I wasn't drinking at 10am the bottle of whiskey I would have bought last night like my other birthdays. Today my wife doesn't hate me. Today I am not embarrassed to show up at my nieces...
    ccneb ccneb 31-35, M 7 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    10 months Thinking about how I have been sober

    for 10 months is completely overwhelming and doesn’t seem real. In fact, it sort of makes me feel panic to think about how far I have come and how I have actually managed to live a better sober life. I am still having a lot of struggles with things despite my sobriety. I am...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 11

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    I Denied My Disease For 10 Years...

    And now I'm going on five months clean and somewhat sober. It took a move from one end of the world to another. A traumatic event times two. And two months of soul searching to get me to where I am now and I've still a long way to go. There's no doubt about that. My journey...
    CharlieDell33 CharlieDell33 31-35 4 Responses Sep 8, 2012

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    I was living an alcoholic lifestyle from 15

    years of age until 23 years of age. I have now been sober since April 8, 2011. During my 8 years of drinking I have lost a lot including jobs, relationships, and much more. After my second DUI, I knew I had to make major changes in my life. I quit drinking cold turkey. Shortly...
    cgmom88 cgmom88 26-30, F 1 Response Mar 16

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    We all struggle with cravings

    and urges for the demon that dominated our lives for so long. At times it is easy, then we face strong cravings. That was my story for the first ten years of my recovery. Then something happened to change things fundamentally. My granddaughter was born early this year. As I have...
    grasser grasser 56-60, M 2 Responses May 24

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    I have been sober for over five years now,

    I don't thin I ever thought I Paul's make it this far. Absolutely love my sober life and want to thank everyone that has been there along the way. To another five. Thank you?
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Mar 23

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    Day 1- Again (But For The LAST Time)

    Last night I ended my streak of sobriety at 50 days. I had one drink and then stopped. Today I find myself starting back at Day 1. I have had to start over before but this time is going to be different. This will be the LAST time I ever start over. I had no idea how I was going...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 11 Responses Sep 11, 2013

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    Progress is an interesting concept.

    So often since the beginning of my journey into a new sober life I have been craving it, wanting to move faster and faster forward, to seperate myself from my past at light speed, often unhappy with slow days or what I felt like were wasted moments. Progress so far has come in...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 3 Responses Jun 3

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    The Best Way to Move Forward is to take a Quick

    Glance at the Past…. For the past several weeks I have been anxious for this year to end. I have felt like 2013 was one of the worst years of my life for quite some time now and I am ready to start fresh hoping that 2014 will be a really great year. I haven’t had a great...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 10 Responses Dec 18, 2013

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    Last October, my drinking had gotten to the

    point where a concerned out-of-town acquaintance called the local police out of concern for my well-being. Long story short, I was involuntarily admitted to a local psychiatric ward for the most lackluster suicide attempt (I drank most of a litre of vodka, had cut one wrist and...
    brattyjenn brattyjenn 41-45, F 3 Responses Jul 3

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    My Drinking Career And How Alcoholics Anonymous Ruined It...

    My name is PrincessMaine and as of August 28, 2010, I had 6 years of sobriety with the fellowship and support of Alcoholics Anonymous... When I open up at any given commitment meeting and stand up at the podium, I usually give the same opening line, even though it's been passed...
    PrincessMaine PrincessMaine 46-50, F 154 Responses Dec 23, 2010

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    Being humbled by a 'borderline' alcoholic

    I had just returned to the apartment complex from an early morning errand today when another resident I'd never seen before approached me and, in a near mania that I didn't understand then but would shortly, begged me for a ride across the city during rush hour to an appointment...
    cmmacneil cmmacneil 51-55, M 12 Responses Aug 30, 2012

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    Hoping To Join That Club...

    Last Friday -- February 25th, 2011 -- I asked my doctor to help me quit drinking under medical supervision. Under sad circumstances; I need surgery for a very serious condition. My alcoholism is extremely severe. It terrifies me.  I hate having to go and buy my booze every day...
    AndrewPenney AndrewPenney 41-45 44 Responses Mar 1, 2011

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    Some days are so full of memories

    that it is nearly impossible to resist a drink. This weekend for me is one of those times. This weekend is harder than the holidays by far. I lost a very good friend the summer after my first year of college. I went away for college but kept in very close contact with her and...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 4 Responses May 3

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    I am a recovering alcoholic ,

    I haven't drank in ten yrs , but I've watched my husband get blitzed everyday of his life for the last ten yrs , we have a 12 yr old daughter together and I really thought he would give it up by now but I don't think he ever will , I feel so guilty because I really have come to...
    donewitit donewitit 41-45, F 2 Responses Mar 20

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    Finally Went To A Damn Meeting.

    After over two weeks of totally avoiding AA meetings, I finally went this morning before work (8/6/13). I still completely hate the meetings for a combination of reasons but I also know that I am approaching the point in my sobriety where I always slip up and drink.  I know that...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 11 Responses Aug 6, 2013

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    AN OPEN LETTER FROM AN ALCOHOLIC I am an

    alcoholic. I need your help. Don't lecture , blame or scold me. You wouldn't be angry at me for having cancer or diabetes. Alcoholism is a disease, too. Don't pour out my liquor, it's just a waste of time because I can always find ways of getting more. Don't me provoke your...
    sexiskey sexiskey 41-45, F 12 Responses Feb 5

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    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 70+ May 21

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    5 years ago today I picked up this white poker

    chip at an AA meeting. It signified 1 day sober. Through the grace of God and the help of a lot of family and friends I'm still holding on to it.
    ChilliDog ChilliDog 41-45, M 5 Responses Apr 3

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    I began chairing meetings this month,

    something I was somewhat pushed into when I was "volunteered" and said fine. It has actually been a really great experience. Each week I have spent time considering and working on various topics. I usually went through 3 or 4 before I settled on one, but I learned a bit about...
    ccneb ccneb 31-35, M 2 Responses Mar 25

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    Two Months!!!!

    I have been sober for two months now and some days feel pretty good while some days/nights are still proving to be some of the worst nights of my life. I am having a hell of a time establishing a new routine in my sober life and I have ended up putting myself closer to relapse...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 8 Responses Nov 11, 2013

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    My Second Chance

    I've been an alcoholic for what seems like an eternity, although I know it's not. I'm in my early 30ies, live in Europe and have been drinking since I was around 22. I've been studying computer sciences, and to fight the boredom and my anxiety, I started drinking. Only beer at...
    drychicken drychicken 31-35 5 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    Day 21

    Every single day has been a struggle. The first 10 days were hard. The headaches, the shaky hands, the sleepless nights and nausea. I sat through the AA meetings and listened to everyone tell me over and over again that it would get better, the days would improve and sobriety...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 9 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    11 months This month was marked with highs

    and lows. I had, for the first time in my life, two solid weeks of total happiness, a calm and completely normal life where I was productive at work and actually felt proud of myself for doing so well. That was followed by some unexpected lows. An abusive flashback hit me hard...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 11

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    I’ve understood all along

    that God cannot know ego and that ego cannot know God. God only knows that a Part of It is unhappy and has sent Help to undo the unhappiness. The ego only knows that there is Something Else that gets your attention. They are diametrically opposed and so have nothing in common...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M Mar 31

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    All ideologies are meaningless,

    whether religious or political, for it is conceptual thinking, the conceptual word, which has so unfortunately divided man. Religion is the frozen thought of man out of which they build temples I maintain that Truth is a pathless land, and you cannot approach it by any path...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Mar 30

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    4 Months Sober

    I feel a lot better now.  I've quit drinking before (2 1/2 years) so I know I can't get too confident.  It is nice though to not be blowing all my money on alcohol and to never wake up hung-over or black out and not remember what I've done.
    ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton 36-40, M 30 Responses Jun 5, 2007

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