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I Am a Recovering Alcoholic

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 725 People

    AN OPEN LETTER FROM AN ALCOHOLIC I am an

    alcoholic. I need your help. Don't lecture , blame or scold me. You wouldn't be angry at me for having cancer or diabetes. Alcoholism is a disease, too. Don't pour out my liquor, it's just a waste of time because I can always find ways of getting more. Don't me provoke your...
    sexiskey sexiskey 41-45, F 13 Responses Feb 5, 2014

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    Hate makes me want to drink.

    Oh how I am hating you today…. Hating you so so so much, so much that I just want to drink to get rid of the hate. I hate the sound of your voice, the sound of your footsteps, the look of your face. I hate how you raised or attempted to raise your children and failed. I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Nov 9, 2014

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    Days Sober = 14

    I have hit the two week mark. I think a lot of people underestimate just how freaking hard this is for me. I still get withdrawals, and more anxiety, and cravings, and have dreams about booze, and and and. I could go on all day. All over on the billboards there are alcohol ads...
    PreferUknown PreferUknown 22-25, F 9 Responses May 27, 2013

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    Alcoholism Can Be Cured Despite A.A.'s Contention To The Contrary

    By Dr. Arthur H. Cain From the September 19, 1964 Saturday Evening Post. An expert charges that Alcoholics anonymous has become a dogmatic cult that blocks medical progress and hampers many members' lives. It is time we made a thorough investigation of Alcoholics Anonymous in the...
    TheCrabbyAngel TheCrabbyAngel 46-50 7 Responses Mar 31, 2013

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    As much as it is scary to admit,

    sobriety is becoming a very enjoyable experience for me. These last few weeks have been incredibly challenging but I have survived them and I have come out of the experiences in a far more solid place in terms of my sobriety and my ability to enjoy my new life. Two weeks ago I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Jun 28, 2014

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    Meaningless. I am more

    than alive today. I am more than just "sober" today. I am more than I was so many years ago. This is the result of the steps for me, where people drinking and the sight of alcohol means nothing. Most 12 steppers fear the outside world I don't. I didn't see "drunk people" this...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Dec 26, 2013

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    hello everyone. my name is kat

    and I am an alcoholic. it's hard to comprehend how much damage alcohol can cause to someone, to themselves, to people around them.. I woke up 5 days ago and thought I have had enough. since then been to two AA meetings. please feel free to look at my blog: unityservicerecovery...
    missundertood2015 missundertood2015 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 4

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    The New 12 Steps

    RARELY HAVE they seen a person who has thoroughly followed their path. Those who do recover are usually people who have recognized AA as a dangerous religious cult, and will not give themselves completely to AA's fanatical program. The AA Cult is constituted primarily of men and...
    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 66-70 2 Responses Mar 25, 2013

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    I think it's bullsh1t

    and unrealistic that one year "rule" about not dating in the first year. I also think it's bullsh1t as a guy, to be limited to only male sponsors. I get along better and easier with women because of my upbringing (issues with father and male authority figures. Whole different...
    Bdeath Bdeath 22-25, M 1 Response Oct 12, 2014

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    AA Doesn't Work For Atheists/Agnostics

    I recently decided that, after twenty years of heavy, almost daily drinking, and an incident that nearly cost me everything, I needed to quit my unhealthy ways and get sober for the first time in my entire adult life.  Though I had quit drinking for brief periods before...
    RedRover RedRover 36-40, F 56 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    Dancing Evergreen

             I checked the number on the incoming call vibrating in my hand. It was a call I was required, by law, to answer twenty-four hours a day seven days a week. I practice walking meditation and breathing exercises around an old historic State Penitentiary long since...
    gsparky22 gsparky22 41-45, M 9 Responses Nov 5, 2012

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    and it took about ? 20 freaking years to accept

    that all that money i spent on booze.. well it was like buying myself depression and more problems. screw that anymore. i'm depressed enough without paying to have more of it. 15 months sober with only 2 slips.
    MeZero0 MeZero0 41-45 1 Response Mar 30

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    Recently I've suffered depression from drinking

    two much Alcohol I've Been walking in the Streets Drunk almost getting hit by cars during the whole entire summer some from Lincoln Way West High School who doesn't know I was an accident just waiting to happen the persons name is Sarah McDonald she knows I have a disability...
    Theinfo Theinfo 22-25, M Dec 27, 2014

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    10 months Thinking about how I have been sober

    for 10 months is completely overwhelming and doesn’t seem real. In fact, it sort of makes me feel panic to think about how far I have come and how I have actually managed to live a better sober life. I am still having a lot of struggles with things despite my sobriety. I am...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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    Hoping To Join That Club...

    Last Friday -- February 25th, 2011 -- I asked my doctor to help me quit drinking under medical supervision. Under sad circumstances; I need surgery for a very serious condition. My alcoholism is extremely severe. It terrifies me.  I hate having to go and buy my booze every day...
    AndrewPenney AndrewPenney 41-45 43 Responses Mar 1, 2011

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    Don't see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain't it grand the wind stopped blowin'?

    KARLA BRADA MURDER VICTIM BY AA MEMBER   Click on to view the Karla Brada Video Story-   http://youtu.be/uABc5vUGuGY   1st video-   http://youtu.be/nua3eekMYl   I am Monica Richardson, the Founder of a grass roots movement to Make AA Safer. We took direct action to do so...
    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 66-70 Mar 14, 2013

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    Holding Your Hands Up.......

    Having gone through myself the devastation that the alchohol illness can cause, I find it horrible when i hear people blaming the person themselves for the pain that they cause while they are drinking. Yes it is ultimately down to the person themselves to stop drinking, but its...
    emmaB7 emmaB7 31-35, F Nov 23, 2012

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    1 year sober!!!!!!!!!

    ! Well it is official..... I have been sober for 1 year. It feels like my last drink was so long ago and so much has changed since then. Ahhhhhhh 1 year---- never thought it was possible and I have never been so excited and proud! Thank you to those that have helped me...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 27 Responses Sep 11, 2014

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    All ideologies are meaningless,

    whether religious or political, for it is conceptual thinking, the conceptual word, which has so unfortunately divided man. Religion is the frozen thought of man out of which they build temples I maintain that Truth is a pathless land, and you cannot approach it by any path...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M Mar 30, 2014

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    Dear alcohol and every pill I took,

    You almost ruined my life. You promised me happiness by agreeing to solve my problems. Instead, you created more and made me to where I couldn't be the best I could be. Thankfully, I am able to leave you all in the past and have found happiness and love in AA meetings, my higher...
    cawnbread cawnbread 18-21, F Feb 9

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    My addiction cost me my health,

    at 24 my liver has failed and I've nearly died. I now have a degenerative bone condition secondary to alcohol abuse and am looking at a hip replacement. I wish I could have appreciated my good health before and known that the consequences to my actions would be so severe.
    itealist itealist 22-25, F 1 Response Aug 7, 2014

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    Let the countdown begin….

    ☺ Only NINE days away from my one-year anniversary has me in a rather reflective mood. I can’t help but sit back and think about the puzzle that is life. Life seems to be comprised of many many little puzzle pieces that fit together in such a way that makes the world make...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Sep 2, 2014

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    So. After years and years of having great luck.

    Knowing all the right people to get me out of trouble. It all finally came apart. Last night I left work about 1030pm and went to the bar. Alone. But since I drink for free there it's okay right? Well, two hours and many drinks and shots later I get behind the wheel to make...
    QBRAIDER QBRAIDER 31-35, M 2 Responses Dec 6, 2014

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    Well I feel good today.

    My side isn't hurting any longer, my anxiety is lessening thanks to the pills. I feel a sense of calm and determination. I think I'll start going out the house more often. This is good.
    IloveLife14 IloveLife14 31-35, F 11 Responses Jan 24, 2014

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    11 months This month was marked with highs

    and lows. I had, for the first time in my life, two solid weeks of total happiness, a calm and completely normal life where I was productive at work and actually felt proud of myself for doing so well. That was followed by some unexpected lows. An abusive flashback hit me hard...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 11, 2014

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    Finally Went To A Damn Meeting.

    After over two weeks of totally avoiding AA meetings, I finally went this morning before work (8/6/13). I still completely hate the meetings for a combination of reasons but I also know that I am approaching the point in my sobriety where I always slip up and drink.  I know that...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 11 Responses Aug 6, 2013

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    18 months! Today marks one

    and a half years sober!!!!! My life is so insanely different from when I first stopped drinking that I really don’t even know what to say. It has been a long and difficult journey so far but it has been amazing to shed my past and discover the person that was hidden for so...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 3 Responses Mar 11

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    And I want to thank my gf

    for it she's my whole life
    javies99 javies99 16-17, M Jul 17, 2014

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    4 Months Sober

    I feel a lot better now.  I've quit drinking before (2 1/2 years) so I know I can't get too confident.  It is nice though to not be blowing all my money on alcohol and to never wake up hung-over or black out and not remember what I've done.
    ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton 36-40, M 30 Responses Jun 5, 2007

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    Day 1- Again (But For The LAST Time)

    Last night I ended my streak of sobriety at 50 days. I had one drink and then stopped. Today I find myself starting back at Day 1. I have had to start over before but this time is going to be different. This will be the LAST time I ever start over. I had no idea how I was going...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 11 Responses Sep 11, 2013

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    "just To Spread The Word"

    Hi everyone; This is more of a little notification than a story. I have told my story her already and it is always freash in my mind. I still thank God every day for giving me the will power and him help for me to quit for good. but what I want to say is that last week on...
    tabitha1960 tabitha1960 51-55, F 4 Responses Jan 17, 2013

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    I have been in recovery now

    for quite a few 24 hours. For the most part, I'm quite happy to be living sober. It's been very freeing. Some days are a struggle just like for anyone else, but today I feel like what's the use? I understand that the feeling of futility often is at the the root of addiction...
    PiscesDream PiscesDream 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 5

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    My environment created me.

    I wasn't always an alcoholic but when you grow up with an inconsiderate drunk for a father and a neurotic mother who always makes excuses for him, how was it possible NOT to go down the wrong path? I have an extremely ugly history with the demon that is alcohol that to this day...
    Alan132 Alan132 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 8

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    Last October, my drinking had gotten to the

    point where a concerned out-of-town acquaintance called the local police out of concern for my well-being. Long story short, I was involuntarily admitted to a local psychiatric ward for the most lackluster suicide attempt (I drank most of a litre of vodka, had cut one wrist and...
    brattyjenn brattyjenn 41-45, F 5 Responses Jul 3, 2014

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    I have spent my entire life seeking

    and yearning for only one thing… relief from the pain of my horrific childhood. I have always fought alone and tried to do the best I could, always dreaming that one day I would finally feel free of the terribly heavy burdens. Now I fight with the support of those who care...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 13, 2014

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    Isn't this a story I'm a 55 year old mani

    started drinking at the age of 11 by 13 I was drinking regularly too often by 15 I could down a bottle of jack in three drinks I have been an alcoholic since I was 13 last year in November I decided it was time to quit it was awful all the DTs for 43 years my body was use to...
    primeoflife primeoflife 51-55, M 3 Responses Mar 4

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    Today Is My Birthday.

    Today, I am 34. Today I am at work instead of having taken the day off to drink. Today I wasn't drinking at 10am the bottle of whiskey I would have bought last night like my other birthdays. Today my wife doesn't hate me. Today I am not embarrassed to show up at my nieces...
    ccneb ccneb 31-35, M 7 Responses Aug 2, 2013

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    3 Months Sober!!!!!!!

    !!! I have somehow managed stay sober for 3 months…  How? I don’t really know. Perhaps. It was luck??  No ******* way….   Actually, to be completely honest, I have fought like hell and accepted an enormous amount of support in order to maintain my sobriety.   Sobriety...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 9 Responses Dec 11, 2013

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    The first time I tried to get sober,

    I had withdrawal symptoms like the shakes, nightmares, sweating, anxiety and depression. Eventually they went away without treatment. I relapsed recently and my parents might put me in rehab. However, I am not having withdrawal symptoms. Would they still detox me in rehab?
    cawnbread cawnbread 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 14

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    My Bottle Was My Best Friend/Worst Enemy.

    I've been "recovering" since jan 2nd 2012, no more waking up and instantly reaching for the whiskey bottle to calm the shaking and make my mind stop spinning erratically and also to make the day easier to face and escape reality with... my eyes opening to the bottle of jack...
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses Jul 27, 2013

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    Mistakes, You've Made A Few (A tip of the hat to Lilt and ccneb)

    Ruminating on your errors and where you got it wrong, is not the same thing as learning from them. If fact it's a sure fire way to set up momentum to repeat those same mistakes later on. Guilt is a very attractive and dynamic vibratory energy. The disease gets very excited about...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 13, 2013

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    To Those It May Concern...

    This is in fact an exact copy of an answer I put in someone else's topic, but I felt it 'good' enough to be posted as a separate entry...  First a joke: You know what they call an alcoholic who ran out of booze? A man with a drinking problem... Okay. I started drinking...
    jimmyrudyjump jimmyrudyjump 51-55, M 13 Responses Mar 30, 2011

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    Today I decided that it is time

    for me to honestly and genuinely start accepting the success in my life. I am someone who has always worked hard in an effort to overcome what I felt like were handicaps in my life. At the very same time I have always done everything in my power to avoid the attention that seems...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 21, 2014

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    13 1/2 months I have to be honest

    and say that the 6 weeks after my one year anniversary have been rough. I have not had a regular schedule at all and emotionally I'm just not feeling well. I have started to drift away from the things that I did regularly in order to make it this far into my sobriety. I have...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Oct 25, 2014

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    My Drinking Career And How Alcoholics Anonymous Ruined It...

    My name is PrincessMaine and as of August 28, 2010, I had 6 years of sobriety with the fellowship and support of Alcoholics Anonymous... When I open up at any given commitment meeting and stand up at the podium, I usually give the same opening line, even though it's been passed...
    PrincessMaine PrincessMaine 46-50, F 149 Responses Dec 23, 2010

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