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I Am a Recovering Alcoholic

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 724 People

    Recently I've suffered depression from drinking

    two much Alcohol I've Been walking in the Streets Drunk almost getting hit by cars during the whole entire summer some from Lincoln Way West High School who doesn't know I was an accident just waiting to happen the persons name is Sarah McDonald she knows I have a disability...
    Theinfo Theinfo 22-25, M Dec 27, 2014

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    My environment created me.

    I wasn't always an alcoholic but when you grow up with an inconsiderate drunk for a father and a neurotic mother who always makes excuses for him, how was it possible NOT to go down the wrong path? I have an extremely ugly history with the demon that is alcohol that to this day...
    Alan132 Alan132 22-25, M 1 Response Jan 8

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    I am 50 days sober, I have been suffering this

    disease since I was 11. I've been in the program for about a month and do not have a sponsor yet. Can I talk to someone when I need it? Message me?
    cawnbread cawnbread 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 29, 2014

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    Day 1- Again (But For The LAST Time)

    Last night I ended my streak of sobriety at 50 days. I had one drink and then stopped. Today I find myself starting back at Day 1. I have had to start over before but this time is going to be different. This will be the LAST time I ever start over. I had no idea how I was going...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 11 Responses Sep 11, 2013

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    13 1/2 months I have to be honest

    and say that the 6 weeks after my one year anniversary have been rough. I have not had a regular schedule at all and emotionally I'm just not feeling well. I have started to drift away from the things that I did regularly in order to make it this far into my sobriety. I have...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Oct 25, 2014

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    As much as it is scary to admit,

    sobriety is becoming a very enjoyable experience for me. These last few weeks have been incredibly challenging but I have survived them and I have come out of the experiences in a far more solid place in terms of my sobriety and my ability to enjoy my new life. Two weeks ago I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Jun 28, 2014

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    Dancing Evergreen

             I checked the number on the incoming call vibrating in my hand. It was a call I was required, by law, to answer twenty-four hours a day seven days a week. I practice walking meditation and breathing exercises around an old historic State Penitentiary long since...
    gsparky22 gsparky22 41-45, M 9 Responses Nov 5, 2012

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    I have spent my entire life seeking

    and yearning for only one thing… relief from the pain of my horrific childhood. I have always fought alone and tried to do the best I could, always dreaming that one day I would finally feel free of the terribly heavy burdens. Now I fight with the support of those who care...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 13, 2014

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    And I want to thank my gf

    for it she's my whole life
    javies99 javies99 16-17, M Jul 17, 2014

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    Today I decided that it is time

    for me to honestly and genuinely start accepting the success in my life. I am someone who has always worked hard in an effort to overcome what I felt like were handicaps in my life. At the very same time I have always done everything in my power to avoid the attention that seems...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Aug 21, 2014

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    hello everyone. my name is kat

    and I am an alcoholic. it's hard to comprehend how much damage alcohol can cause to someone, to themselves, to people around them.. I woke up 5 days ago and thought I have had enough. since then been to two AA meetings. please feel free to look at my blog: unityservicerecovery...
    missundertood2015 missundertood2015 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 4

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    9 months! It doesn’t

    even seem real. This month has been a lot of struggle with my self-esteem. I don’t at all feel worthy or deserving on a regular basis, which allows me to slip into pretty deep dark spells in my head. I have spent 25 years being abused or abusing myself and I am finding it...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 5 Responses Jun 11, 2014

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    Well I feel good today.

    My side isn't hurting any longer, my anxiety is lessening thanks to the pills. I feel a sense of calm and determination. I think I'll start going out the house more often. This is good.
    IloveLife14 IloveLife14 31-35, F 11 Responses Jan 24, 2014

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    Don't see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain't it grand the wind stopped blowin'?

    KARLA BRADA MURDER VICTIM BY AA MEMBER   Click on to view the Karla Brada Video Story-   http://youtu.be/uABc5vUGuGY   1st video-   http://youtu.be/nua3eekMYl   I am Monica Richardson, the Founder of a grass roots movement to Make AA Safer. We took direct action to do so...
    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 66-70 Mar 14, 2013

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    Let the countdown begin….

    ☺ Only NINE days away from my one-year anniversary has me in a rather reflective mood. I can’t help but sit back and think about the puzzle that is life. Life seems to be comprised of many many little puzzle pieces that fit together in such a way that makes the world make...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Sep 2, 2014

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    My Second Chance

    I've been an alcoholic for what seems like an eternity, although I know it's not. I'm in my early 30ies, live in Europe and have been drinking since I was around 22. I've been studying computer sciences, and to fight the boredom and my anxiety, I started drinking. Only beer at...
    drychicken drychicken 31-35 5 Responses Jun 2, 2013

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    16 Months Sober My life today is

    so so so different than day one of sobriety. At times it feels like I am living someone else’s life because there is just no way that this could be my life. My life was a disaster and now things make sense. I was barely surviving and now I make plans on how to improve and...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 17

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    AN OPEN LETTER FROM AN ALCOHOLIC I am an

    alcoholic. I need your help. Don't lecture , blame or scold me. You wouldn't be angry at me for having cancer or diabetes. Alcoholism is a disease, too. Don't pour out my liquor, it's just a waste of time because I can always find ways of getting more. Don't me provoke your...
    sexiskey sexiskey 41-45, F 12 Responses Feb 5, 2014

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    The Gift He hands me a package wrapped in

    silver paper with a hot pink bow on top. The box is square and thin, with a little weight to it. He says nothing as he hands it to me and I say nothing in response. This is what he does to me. He paralyzes my mind. I can’t speak. I can’t think. I take the box. I obey. I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 3 Responses Nov 30, 2014

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    Last October, my drinking had gotten to the

    point where a concerned out-of-town acquaintance called the local police out of concern for my well-being. Long story short, I was involuntarily admitted to a local psychiatric ward for the most lackluster suicide attempt (I drank most of a litre of vodka, had cut one wrist and...
    brattyjenn brattyjenn 41-45, F 5 Responses Jul 3, 2014

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    10 months Thinking about how I have been sober

    for 10 months is completely overwhelming and doesn’t seem real. In fact, it sort of makes me feel panic to think about how far I have come and how I have actually managed to live a better sober life. I am still having a lot of struggles with things despite my sobriety. I am...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Jul 11, 2014

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    Meaningless. I am more

    than alive today. I am more than just "sober" today. I am more than I was so many years ago. This is the result of the steps for me, where people drinking and the sight of alcohol means nothing. Most 12 steppers fear the outside world I don't. I didn't see "drunk people" this...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Dec 26, 2013

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    The first time I tried to get sober,

    I had withdrawal symptoms like the shakes, nightmares, sweating, anxiety and depression. Eventually they went away without treatment. I relapsed recently and my parents might put me in rehab. However, I am not having withdrawal symptoms. Would they still detox me in rehab?
    cawnbread cawnbread 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 14

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    Day 21

    Every single day has been a struggle. The first 10 days were hard. The headaches, the shaky hands, the sleepless nights and nausea. I sat through the AA meetings and listened to everyone tell me over and over again that it would get better, the days would improve and sobriety...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 9 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    To Those It May Concern...

    This is in fact an exact copy of an answer I put in someone else's topic, but I felt it 'good' enough to be posted as a separate entry...  First a joke: You know what they call an alcoholic who ran out of booze? A man with a drinking problem... Okay. I started drinking...
    jimmyrudyjump jimmyrudyjump 51-55, M 13 Responses Mar 30, 2011

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    I think it's bullsh1t

    and unrealistic that one year "rule" about not dating in the first year. I also think it's bullsh1t as a guy, to be limited to only male sponsors. I get along better and easier with women because of my upbringing (issues with father and male authority figures. Whole different...
    Bdeath Bdeath 22-25, M 1 Response Oct 12, 2014

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    Finally Went To A Damn Meeting.

    After over two weeks of totally avoiding AA meetings, I finally went this morning before work (8/6/13). I still completely hate the meetings for a combination of reasons but I also know that I am approaching the point in my sobriety where I always slip up and drink.  I know that...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 11 Responses Aug 6, 2013

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    4 Months Sober

    I feel a lot better now.  I've quit drinking before (2 1/2 years) so I know I can't get too confident.  It is nice though to not be blowing all my money on alcohol and to never wake up hung-over or black out and not remember what I've done.
    ReformedAutomaton ReformedAutomaton 36-40, M 30 Responses Jun 5, 2007

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    I Denied My Disease For 10 Years...

    And now I'm going on five months clean and somewhat sober. It took a move from one end of the world to another. A traumatic event times two. And two months of soul searching to get me to where I am now and I've still a long way to go. There's no doubt about that. My journey...
    CharlieDell33 CharlieDell33 31-35 4 Responses Sep 8, 2012

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    The New 12 Steps

    RARELY HAVE they seen a person who has thoroughly followed their path. Those who do recover are usually people who have recognized AA as a dangerous religious cult, and will not give themselves completely to AA's fanatical program. The AA Cult is constituted primarily of men and...
    NeoJesusOfTheMatrix NeoJesusOfTheMatrix 66-70 2 Responses Mar 25, 2013

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    I have been in recovery now

    for quite a few 24 hours. For the most part, I'm quite happy to be living sober. It's been very freeing. Some days are a struggle just like for anyone else, but today I feel like what's the use? I understand that the feeling of futility often is at the the root of addiction...
    PiscesDream PiscesDream 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 5

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    Hate makes me want to drink.

    Oh how I am hating you today…. Hating you so so so much, so much that I just want to drink to get rid of the hate. I hate the sound of your voice, the sound of your footsteps, the look of your face. I hate how you raised or attempted to raise your children and failed. I...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 6 Responses Nov 9, 2014

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    My Bottle Was My Best Friend/Worst Enemy.

    I've been "recovering" since jan 2nd 2012, no more waking up and instantly reaching for the whiskey bottle to calm the shaking and make my mind stop spinning erratically and also to make the day easier to face and escape reality with... my eyes opening to the bottle of jack...
    deleted deleted 26-30 8 Responses Jul 27, 2013

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    3 Months Sober!!!!!!!

    !!! I have somehow managed stay sober for 3 months…  How? I don’t really know. Perhaps. It was luck??  No ******* way….   Actually, to be completely honest, I have fought like hell and accepted an enormous amount of support in order to maintain my sobriety.   Sobriety...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 9 Responses Dec 11, 2013

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    AA Doesn't Work For Atheists/Agnostics

    I recently decided that, after twenty years of heavy, almost daily drinking, and an incident that nearly cost me everything, I needed to quit my unhealthy ways and get sober for the first time in my entire adult life.  Though I had quit drinking for brief periods before...
    RedRover RedRover 36-40, F 56 Responses Jun 15, 2009

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    I am an alcoholic and I have been struggling

    with this disease for almost 10 years. I have been sober since June 6th 2014, so I am about 5 and a half months clean. I haven't started working the steps yet and I don't have a sponsor. Any input on that? Any recovered alcoholics that want to chat or vent I'm here. Thanks for...
    lanadarling lanadarling 22-25, F 3 Responses Nov 21, 2014

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    Hoping To Join That Club...

    Last Friday -- February 25th, 2011 -- I asked my doctor to help me quit drinking under medical supervision. Under sad circumstances; I need surgery for a very serious condition. My alcoholism is extremely severe. It terrifies me.  I hate having to go and buy my booze every day...
    AndrewPenney AndrewPenney 41-45 44 Responses Mar 1, 2011

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    5 years ago today I picked up this white poker

    chip at an AA meeting. It signified 1 day sober. Through the grace of God and the help of a lot of family and friends I'm still holding on to it.
    ChilliDog ChilliDog 41-45, M 5 Responses Apr 3, 2014

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    1 year sober!!!!!!!!!

    ! Well it is official..... I have been sober for 1 year. It feels like my last drink was so long ago and so much has changed since then. Ahhhhhhh 1 year---- never thought it was possible and I have never been so excited and proud! Thank you to those that have helped me...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 27 Responses Sep 11, 2014

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    11 months This month was marked with highs

    and lows. I had, for the first time in my life, two solid weeks of total happiness, a calm and completely normal life where I was productive at work and actually felt proud of myself for doing so well. That was followed by some unexpected lows. An abusive flashback hit me hard...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 2 Responses Aug 11, 2014

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    Two Months!!!!

    I have been sober for two months now and some days feel pretty good while some days/nights are still proving to be some of the worst nights of my life. I am having a hell of a time establishing a new routine in my sober life and I have ended up putting myself closer to relapse...
    Overwhelmed15 Overwhelmed15 26-30, F 8 Responses Nov 11, 2013

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    So. After years and years of having great luck.

    Knowing all the right people to get me out of trouble. It all finally came apart. Last night I left work about 1030pm and went to the bar. Alone. But since I drink for free there it's okay right? Well, two hours and many drinks and shots later I get behind the wheel to make...
    QBRAIDER QBRAIDER 31-35, M 2 Responses Dec 6, 2014

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    All ideologies are meaningless,

    whether religious or political, for it is conceptual thinking, the conceptual word, which has so unfortunately divided man. Religion is the frozen thought of man out of which they build temples I maintain that Truth is a pathless land, and you cannot approach it by any path...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Mar 30, 2014

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    Days Sober = 14

    I have hit the two week mark. I think a lot of people underestimate just how freaking hard this is for me. I still get withdrawals, and more anxiety, and cravings, and have dreams about booze, and and and. I could go on all day. All over on the billboards there are alcohol ads...
    PreferUknown PreferUknown 22-25, F 9 Responses May 27, 2013

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    Mistakes, You've Made A Few (A tip of the hat to Lilt and ccneb)

    Ruminating on your errors and where you got it wrong, is not the same thing as learning from them. If fact it's a sure fire way to set up momentum to repeat those same mistakes later on. Guilt is a very attractive and dynamic vibratory energy. The disease gets very excited about...
    StarWanderer StarWanderer 56-60, M 1 Response Aug 13, 2013

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    Alcoholism Can Be Cured Despite A.A.'s Contention To The Contrary

    By Dr. Arthur H. Cain From the September 19, 1964 Saturday Evening Post. An expert charges that Alcoholics anonymous has become a dogmatic cult that blocks medical progress and hampers many members' lives. It is time we made a thorough investigation of Alcoholics Anonymous in the...
    TheCrabbyAngel TheCrabbyAngel 46-50 7 Responses Mar 31, 2013

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