I Am a Recovering Self-harmer

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 418 People

    My Story: Self Harm

    I started self harming in eighth grade. I was still recovering emotionally from my parents divorce when I was in sixth grade. In sixth grade I was thrust into the responsibility of being a parent figure to my younger siblings, and two out of the three have ADHD. Taking care of...
    littleoneforever littleoneforever
    16-17, F
    1 Response Oct 8, 2012

    How do people approach self-harm?

    Some people just tell us to stop, that it's bad for us. But don't you think that we know that? Others see how we get relief from it and end up not doing anything. But why not help? But really, self-harm is a mental war. On one side you have all the stress and sadness and on the...
    asunasaoa asunasaoa
    13-15, F
    1 Response Feb 26

    Self harming sucks. It's not fun,

    it's not beautiful, it's harmful and ugly. I almost relapsed today, it was really scary. I hate that I'm afraid to let myself go near sharp objects. I wouldn't wish this upon anyone. Even when I'm happy, elated, or just in a good mood, I still feel the need to hurt myself...
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell
    18-21, T
    2 Responses May 9, 2015

    I recently returned from an amazing week of

    summer camp. I've been struggling with eating and cutting really bad these past few months. At camp my health was an issue. The EMT at the camp had read me this story and it has changed my life forever. The story is called "to write love on her arms." Right after he shared this...
    ebai3489 ebai3489
    18-21, F
    Jun 9, 2014

    I've stopped for many weeks,

    one of the larger time gaps for me being clean. I'm still so tempted, there's an urge that never truly just disappears. Probably why I end up returning. I should feel proud but I only crave my old knife even more :- Any tips to get through lonely nights and days?
    Ugnius2121 Ugnius2121
    16-17, M
    3 Responses Nov 25, 2015

    The last time I cut myself was yesterday.

    I regret it, and I'm trying so hard to recover. But I black out and my mind just shuts down and I lose control. Then I can't remember what I did after I did it. I don't know how to gain dominance over these feelings. I want to stop. I've tried several different ways to get my...
    pennyly pennyly
    13-15, F
    2 Responses Jul 19, 2014

    Hi. My name is Annie.

    Do you have tumblr? If so, follow me @youre-gorgeous-to-me & I'll follow you back and fav your stuff
    annieejenkinss annieejenkinss
    13-15, F
    Sep 5, 2015

    i'm getting better. i'm really getting

    somewhere this time i thin i've not cut for a couple of months now, i've not scratched, bit or hit myself. i don't feel the need like i used to, i don't spend most of the day planning how i was going to do it and where and how i'd have to hide it. i'm getting there, i just hope...
    makeitsomeday makeitsomeday
    18-21, F
    Dec 4, 2014

    I have been self-harming in some way

    for almost 12 years. I am currently 17, I will be 18 this year (2014) . I have had my relapses and previously had only been capable of being clean for a month. This try however, has been TWO months and a week. Recovery is possible. Im on here to talk about my story, how to...
    BrokenButNotBeaten BrokenButNotBeaten
    18-21, F
    May 9, 2014

    It was a year ago. I started it

    for a stupid reason. On a whim, I thought I'd try it. My first time I made three cuts. I thought taking the blade slowly across my skin was how it was done. A week later, I discovered the rush of running it hard and fast; the bite hit me instantly. Like love at first sight. My...
    EvaianRae EvaianRae
    18-21, F
    Jul 24, 2015

    I relapsed again after 3 months.

    Things are not getting any easier..
    cayelynnnn cayelynnnn
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 31, 2014

    I used to self harm. haven't

    for two years. believe it or not I still struggle with the thought of doing it. I thought I wouldn't anymore.. it's been two years, you know? I pictured running the blade across my wrist several times.. I can't open that door to hell again.. I can't.
    lydiamarie15 lydiamarie15
    16-17, F
    Aug 25, 2015

    I surprisingly fought the urge last night.

    I thought about it in the shower, and I picked up the razor, told myself later, but I never did it. :)
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan
    18-21
    1 Response Apr 1, 2014

    I havent felt like this in a long time,

    but I'm just not feeling good today at all. I'm just angry and sad, I'm not quite sure why. I can't handle being with people while I'm like this because I'm afraid I will hurt someone
    ToriKilljoy ToriKilljoy
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jan 30, 2015

    So, I've been clean for 3

    or 4 weeks now, and for some reason, all I've wanted to do today is cut.. I don't know what to do.. Got any ideas?
    UnderTheSleeves UnderTheSleeves
    16-17, F
    4 Responses Mar 19, 2015

    This world This world is

    but a city, corrupt, burnt, and fallen. Its soul has gone black. This world is but a scar, torn, shattered, and broken. Its damage can’t be healed. This world is but a curse, dark, hollow, and lost. Its wounds self inflicted. This world is but a memory. Ancient, painful...
    imrolling imrolling
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jun 1, 2014

    I used to cut myself

    but then I realized there was no need cause it wasn't going to solve any problems and it's just an addiction and we are all worth it somehow. It was a hard process and I did it but now I need some advice. My friend started cutting not too long ago and she showed me a picture of...
    Emsickles Emsickles
    16-17, F
    Jul 10, 2015

    Step Follows Step

    I have been a self-harmer for almost three years now. I want to stop hurting myself this way, but I have to fight myself over it frequently. Every time I feel the need to burn myself or slice myself open it gets harder to resist again. Last week I gave in after a month of...
    Xenobia Xenobia
    22-25, F
    1 Response Nov 9, 2009

    For the past 3 years of my life I have self

    harmed almost every single day, but this is the first time I have ever been able to say that I am 1 month clean and I have never felt this confident in my life, honestly. I just don't see how self harm really helps me with anything, it just distracted me from dealing with my...
    originalitydied originalitydied
    13-15, F
    3 Responses Dec 18, 2014

    I was self harm free

    for about five months, and one day I started having rushing thoughts I started overthinking everything I saw everything that wasn't bad as a horrible thing . I was anxious I started looking for relief when I found a box I had hidden from myself . In that box I had blades and...
    uunbroken uunbroken
    16-17, F
    Apr 17, 2014

    Recovery Realizing that you're worth

    it Experiencing true happiness Caring about yourself Overcoming your own demons Validating your worth Eating without regret Relapse-it's bound to happen, and that's ok Yearning to live I found this on the internet a few weeks ago, and I've realized that this really IS what...
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan
    18-21
    Dec 27, 2013

    I cut my self almost daily

    for about a year and half. I have finally been clean since late August, I have never felt so good in so long.
    jess965 jess965
    16-17, F
    1 Response Jan 3, 2015

    I'm trying so hard...

    I'm a scratcher and my mum made me promise not to do it anymore she says I have no reason to do it but she doesn't understand it's not just when I'm upset it's whenever I feel the need. I just want it to stop I feel like someone with serious problems and I don't want to be. I...
    Robinwing Robinwing
    13-15
    May 22, 2015

    On Saturday I will be one week clean

    and that's an accomplishment considering what I used to be
    lydiathethingy lydiathethingy
    16-17, F
    Nov 6, 2014

    Idk If I'm recovering.

    ..? Since I did it like last week...:/ but I would like to find ppl like me...
    slenderlovefoeeva2367 slenderlovefoeeva2367
    13-15, F
    5 Responses May 13, 2014

    since the age of 12 i have self harmed,

    i have a lot of scars and i regret them all but i still cant help but cut myself, however i used to do it daily and now its once a week or so, i am going through dbt therapy which is helping and slowly i am self harming less, i am determined to beat self harm one day x
    fantasycaver fantasycaver
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Aug 2, 2014

    Faded Scars

    I am a recovering cutter. But tonight, I look at the faded scar tissue up and down my wrists, throat, thighs, ankles, hands and stomach; and there is a part of me that wants more. It's a sick addiction, I know. But the pain I feel right now, or should be feeling I guess, is not...
    klizanne klizanne
    16-17, F
    Feb 1, 2013

    It's been a couple months

    since my last episode. It's exhausting living a life with self harm. If you have any questions about self harm just comment or message me. Please be respectful. I will try to answer the best to my ability.
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell
    18-21, T
    1 Response Apr 8, 2015

    I have been clean for 7 months

    and 16 days. I think about hurting myself every day. Every minute is a struggle. I don't know how to erase the urges. I need to let go of my scars and move on but I lay in bed wishing I could bring physical pain to myself. It's just getting so hard and I don't know who I am...
    clairemariec clairemariec
    16-17, F
    1 Response Nov 17, 2014

    It's been about two weeks

    since I last cut. I had the urge Sunday so I went outside and beat a tree with a broom. 😕
    PurpleHart PurpleHart
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jul 15, 2014

    Everything is falling apart

    and I'm losing everyone and I don't know what to do I'm just blaring my music and sobbing into my pillow I really feel like I'm going to self harm and I'm freaking out
    LostAndLonelyBoy LostAndLonelyBoy
    16-17, M
    Aug 17, 2015

    Today makes six months,

    a full half a year, since I threw away my razors. I did make a mistake, shortly after I got in a wreck and didn't know how to deal with the aftermath of feeling so tired and down....and I would have started the count all over again...but my very loving girlfriend Sunny said no...
    SunnysWifeBlue SunnysWifeBlue
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Jul 3, 2015

    I'm reaching 11 months clean

    but in the back of my mind I still see myself and remember how great it felt, I know It isn't good but there's always that little picture in the back of my head
    totalnoteover totalnoteover
    16-17, F
    1 Response Dec 1, 2014

    yesterday (24th of March) was.

    .. It was hard. I didn't feel bad or anxious until late night, and even then it wasn't that bad really. I however had a problem. At about mid-day I started to get this really strong need to self harm again. It wasn't even an urge, I felt I needed it. ''''''i have't self harmed in...
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 25, 2015

    I am literally so happy

    that my physical scars are fading . There are barely any visible scars on my arms . People don't ask questions anymore . I don't get nervous dancing or letting people see my body . I am at a really good place . I still think about it all the time but I'm stronger than that .
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Nov 18, 2014

    I Dont Know If I Should Even Call Myself Recovering

    I am on the path to stopping but like everyone knows its easier said that done. I hate that im a self harmer, and i know a lot of people think im pathetic and such but when you have absolutely no one to turn to, and you dont know how to get rid of these feelings inside of you...
    UmbraEyes UmbraEyes
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jan 8, 2012

    I have this "friend".

    I used to trust her with how I felt and my problems. I cared for her, she cared for me. But she no longer gives a **** about me. So I went back on over the shelf depressant medication. About one week ago the meds ran out, and I couldn't get more. So I relapsed into drinking. And...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    Dec 20, 2015

    10 days clean today. Pretty proud of myself.

    Had really bad urges yesterday, but I overcame them.
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan
    18-21
    Apr 21, 2014

    I have legs covered in white lines.

    Its disgusting. Self harm is disgusting, I hate it and I regret all of it but I'm moving in with my life and I'm alive - that's what matters
    ararison ararison
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jun 12, 2014

    Lately I've decided to really try to stoop self

    harming and so far it is going really well. I'm still not ready to recover from my ED (eating disorder) but self harm has made such a big impact in my life that it's become an addiction and a obsession and it is incredibly unhealthy- physically and mentally. Wish me luck xxx...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Nov 18, 2014

    I haven't self harmed

    for 3 years and I'm still recovering from my past..
    Brookedrumm Brookedrumm
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 19, 2014

    I mess up sometimes, I do.

    But I am so much better than I used to. 'I haven't self harmed in over half a year (minus some minor mess ups, maybe 3-5 times.) I'm scared of it getting worse again, but so far, so good. It used to be so messed up... Jesus! What the hell was I doing? Oh well... It barely...
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes
    18-21, F
    1 Response Mar 20, 2015

    1 month clean so far.

    You wouldn't believe the withdrawals I've gone through
    BooBear99 BooBear99
    16-17, F
    1 Response Dec 27, 2014

    Read this if you get urges again(come on give

    me a chance...) Remind yourself what will happen if you give up.How are you going to deal with it and how are you going to feel?Remind yourself why you don't need self harm over and over again,even if your mind refuses it.Don't give up.You might lose control and do it again.That...
    ghostdolly ghostdolly
    16-17, F
    Jan 24

    I ****** up... It was over half a year ago!

    Now I ******* threw it all! All that work, all that pain... It's for nothing now... I threw it all away. I couldn't hate myself more right now.
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Apr 13, 2015

    I haven't hurt myself in a long time

    but I still struggle with thoughts and urges. Taking the leapt and seeing a therapist every week has helped but I can tell I'm not completely over it. My family tries to understand but I know they don't. At the end of the day - I just keep fighting and I hope to make it through...
    TheRecluse TheRecluse
    26-30, F
    Mar 13
More Stories