Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Am a Recovering Self-harmer

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 385 People

    11 weeks clean today!

    Hooray for squashing the "little monster". I'm so happy I've made it this far. 3 month mark here I come!!
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Jun 9, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    7 months today!!! Every month

    that passes I put it more and more behind me. In 3 short months it will be a year since I self harmed, so great to keep the fight up! It's so far behind me that I rarely have urges, I think about it but my thoughts are more about how far I've come rather than about the action of...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 3 Responses Oct 6, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    17 weeks clean...FREEDOM!

    !! Loving it the urges are slowly going away as I am realizing nothing is worth cutting over, when I'm hurting u won't contribute to myself hurting more!!
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Jul 22, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    3 days clean. It's rather tough,

    the triggers are everyone and everything, everywhere
    ExoticSnow ExoticSnow 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 20, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I am literally so happy

    that my physical scars are fading . There are barely any visible scars on my arms . People don't ask questions anymore . I don't get nervous dancing or letting people see my body . I am at a really good place . I still think about it all the time but I'm stronger than that .
    Alylovespuppies Alylovespuppies 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 18, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So, I've been clean for 3

    or 4 weeks now, and for some reason, all I've wanted to do today is cut.. I don't know what to do.. Got any ideas?
    UnderTheSleeves UnderTheSleeves 13-15, F 4 Responses Mar 19

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I haven't self harmed

    for 3 years and I'm still recovering from my past..
    Brookedrumm Brookedrumm 16-17, F 1 Response Nov 19, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm trying so hard...

    I'm a scratcher and my mum made me promise not to do it anymore she says I have no reason to do it but she doesn't understand it's not just when I'm upset it's whenever I feel the need. I just want it to stop I feel like someone with serious problems and I don't want to be. I...
    Robinwing Robinwing 13-15 1 Response May 22

    Your Response

    Cancel
    lovealwayz lovealwayz 16-17, F Sep 22, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    1 month clean so far.

    You wouldn't believe the withdrawals I've gone through
    BooBear99 BooBear99 16-17, F 1 Response Dec 27, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Almost cut last night,

    I was upset and I was sitting in the bathroom holding my razor and I was crying of course because I was torn over what to do. I had the urge to do it but I thought about all the hard work to get to where I was and I managed to put the razor down for the night. I was hoping that...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Jun 30, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    23 weeks clean today!

    ! 1 more week and it'll be 6 months can't wait!!
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 1, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I have been self-harming in some way

    for almost 12 years. I am currently 17, I will be 18 this year (2014) . I have had my relapses and previously had only been capable of being clean for a month. This try however, has been TWO months and a week. Recovery is possible. Im on here to talk about my story, how to...
    BrokenButNotBeaten BrokenButNotBeaten 18-21, F May 9, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    yesterday (24th of March) was.

    .. It was hard. I didn't feel bad or anxious until late night, and even then it wasn't that bad really. I however had a problem. At about mid-day I started to get this really strong need to self harm again. It wasn't even an urge, I felt I needed it. ''''''i have't self harmed in...
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 25

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Recovery Realizing that you're worth

    it Experiencing true happiness Caring about yourself Overcoming your own demons Validating your worth Eating without regret Relapse-it's bound to happen, and that's ok Yearning to live I found this on the internet a few weeks ago, and I've realized that this really IS what...
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan 18-21 Dec 27, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    And today I relapsed

    after a year clean.
    suchi715 suchi715 16-17, F Oct 14, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    6.5 months clean yesterday!

    ! Gaaaahhh how did this happen?!? Who'd of thought I was strong enough for that :O every week I get farther and farther away from it but every week feels like the first week of accomplishment it never gets old even though the scars do, you never forget where you came from and you...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 1 Response Sep 23, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    10 years. From the young age of 9.

    That's when it started. I remember the first time. .. The drama. .. The tears. ..The silence. ..The blood. But I also remember the sheer relief that followed. It took me a few years to tell my mum. Even after she found out, I didn't tell her when I hurt myself. It got so bad...
    TheOriginalDarkHorse TheOriginalDarkHorse 18-21, F 1 Response May 18, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I surprisingly fought the urge last night.

    I thought about it in the shower, and I picked up the razor, told myself later, but I never did it. :)
    EmoSakurachan EmoSakurachan 18-21 1 Response Apr 1, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    7 and 1/2 weeks clean!

    The urges are still there but they are getting better. I am hopeful that the more I stay clean the less the urges will affect me. My therapy also seems to be helping and my meds have finally started working, so things seem to be coming together I can't wait until I get past the...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F May 16, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's been 3 months and 2 days

    since I last harmed. It's getting more and more difficult to stay strong, I posted not too long ago that I was struggling and I still am. Everything in my life is taking it's toll on me and staying harm free is incredibly difficult when that's all you know when things get tough...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 2 Responses Jun 18, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Self harming sucks. It's not fun,

    it's not beautiful, it's harmful and ugly. I almost relapsed today, it was really scary. I hate that I'm afraid to let myself go near sharp objects. I wouldn't wish this upon anyone. Even when I'm happy, elated, or just in a good mood, I still feel the need to hurt myself...
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell 18-21, T 2 Responses May 9

    Your Response

    Cancel

    8 months clean today.

    Super proud of myself for this tiny accomplishment. :)
    TheSongPlaysWithin TheSongPlaysWithin 18-21, F Sep 23, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I was self harm free

    for about five months, and one day I started having rushing thoughts I started overthinking everything I saw everything that wasn't bad as a horrible thing . I was anxious I started looking for relief when I found a box I had hidden from myself . In that box I had blades and...
    uunbroken uunbroken 16-17, F Apr 17, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I'm reaching 11 months clean

    but in the back of my mind I still see myself and remember how great it felt, I know It isn't good but there's always that little picture in the back of my head
    totalnoteover totalnoteover 13-15, F 1 Response Dec 1, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    5 months clean today!

    !! So happy!
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 11, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I started when I was 12.

    my road has been difficult, but i have been "clean" for 66 days. not one of those days do i regret...
    bellafigueroa45 bellafigueroa45 16-17, F 1 Response Jun 11

    Your Response

    Cancel

    i'm getting better. i'm really getting

    somewhere this time i thin i've not cut for a couple of months now, i've not scratched, bit or hit myself. i don't feel the need like i used to, i don't spend most of the day planning how i was going to do it and where and how i'd have to hide it. i'm getting there, i just hope...
    makeitsomeday makeitsomeday 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 4, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I mess up sometimes, I do.

    But I am so much better than I used to. 'I haven't self harmed in over half a year (minus some minor mess ups, maybe 3-5 times.) I'm scared of it getting worse again, but so far, so good. It used to be so messed up... Jesus! What the hell was I doing? Oh well... It barely...
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes 18-21, F 1 Response Mar 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    And I got hit by pretty bad urges tonight

    and I'm trying not to give in after almost a year clean.
    suchi715 suchi715 16-17, F 2 Responses Oct 11, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I am recovered, haven't cut

    since January. Anyone out there who is cutting, you can make it through this. All it takes is determination and support. :)
    left4deadspace left4deadspace 18-21, M Sep 1, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I cut my self almost daily

    for about a year and half. I have finally been clean since late August, I have never felt so good in so long.
    jess965 jess965 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 3

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Most of my scars have faded now

    but I still get the urge to occasionally. When I do get upset I go over the scar in liquid eye liner and remember all the different reasons I created these scars on my body. And honestly none of the reasons matter now. Ever since getting out of an abusive relationship and away...
    justfloatingby2day justfloatingby2day 18-21, F Mar 20

    Your Response

    Cancel

    On Saturday I will be one week clean

    and that's an accomplishment considering what I used to be
    lydiathethingy lydiathethingy 16-17, F Nov 6, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    10 weeks clean tomorrow!

    No cutting, burning, or starving myself! I'm not normally proud of myself but I can honestly say I am proud of what I have done so far! I hope to make it to the 3 month mark and farther!
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Jun 1, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    11.5 weeks harm free

    but I'm having a hard time. I have bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder which is making my life hard plus I just lost a good friend. Things have been hard and when things get hard it's easy to turn to self harm, but I'm really trying to stay strong. I'm just...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Jun 12, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I ****** up... It was over half a year ago!

    Now I ******* threw it all! All that work, all that pain... It's for nothing now... I threw it all away. I couldn't hate myself more right now.
    bluecupcakes bluecupcakes 18-21, F 2 Responses Apr 13

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I have legs covered in white lines.

    Its disgusting. Self harm is disgusting, I hate it and I regret all of it but I'm moving in with my life and I'm alive - that's what matters
    ararison ararison 22-25, F Jun 12, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Idk If I'm recovering.

    ..? Since I did it like last week...:/ but I would like to find ppl like me...
    slenderlovefoeeva2367 slenderlovefoeeva2367 13-15, F 6 Responses May 13, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Lately I've decided to really try to stoop self

    harming and so far it is going really well. I'm still not ready to recover from my ED (eating disorder) but self harm has made such a big impact in my life that it's become an addiction and a obsession and it is incredibly unhealthy- physically and mentally. Wish me luck xxx...
    littlecrazymia littlecrazymia 13-15, F 4 Responses Nov 18, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    It's been a couple months

    since my last episode. It's exhausting living a life with self harm. If you have any questions about self harm just comment or message me. Please be respectful. I will try to answer the best to my ability.
    TickleMeCell TickleMeCell 18-21, T 1 Response Apr 8

    Your Response

    Cancel

    5 weeks clean. It not a lot

    but it's something. Still have urges everyday but that'll last a while, maybe years so I'll just have to keep fighting it, everyday I find reasons as to why I should harm myself and it's like an addiction too but so far harming has not lead me to a happy life only this cycle of...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 29, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I was 4 months self harm free

    but then I relapsed. Now I'm 3 weeks clean no where near 4 months but I'll hopefully get there. I'm just fighting the urge, fighting the addiction. It's not easy but that's what recovery is all about, having the strength to get through the pain. I hope I last 4 months again and...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F Apr 17, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I relapsed again after 3 months.

    Things are not getting any easier..
    cayelynnnn cayelynnnn 18-21, F 1 Response Dec 31, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I havent felt like this in a long time,

    but I'm just not feeling good today at all. I'm just angry and sad, I'm not quite sure why. I can't handle being with people while I'm like this because I'm afraid I will hurt someone
    ToriKilljoy ToriKilljoy 18-21, F 2 Responses Jan 30

    Your Response

    Cancel

    So happy I made it to the 4 month mark a few

    days ago!!! Still staying strong even though the urges won't settle!! For now I'm winning :)
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 16, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel