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I Am a Self Hating Homosexual

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 71 People

    I Hate Wat I Feel ...

     i really wish i was different. I dont like wat i feel is against my personal beliefs.. but sometimes i feel like its really hard to control wat i feel. Why cant i just be normal ?
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jan 26, 2010

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    Well

    well, im here for all the same reasons you guys are..and the title of this whole page kinda gives it away so i aint gunna explain myself. yeah im a self hating gay, i hate being gay, i hate gays, i hate the scene, and basically i dont actually know what to do. its not really an...
    russdy russdy 18-21 3 Responses Sep 19, 2010

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    Uncertainty About My Sexuality

    Hey.. First of all it felt so good that i found out that im not the only one wgo struggles.. Im 16 years of age and i've struggled for the last few years since i was oriented into these homosexual temptations.. And its so hard.. Im still struggling to fight it.. Sometimes it just...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 18, 2013

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    My Parents Hate Me

    Before I came out of the closet I was their pride and joy: they bragged about me to their friends, they told me they loved me ten times a day and they showered me in affection. When I did come out, they couldn't believe it-- I'm "too beautiful to be a lesbian!" Now, they berate...
    PrettyLion PrettyLion 13-15, F 2 Responses Sep 23, 2013

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    Well, I am 19. I have been out

    for almost 2 years and I have had a girlfriend for over a year. But I can't help but hate myself I hate who I am and that I love her. I don't want to leave her. But I feel like god hates me and I am going to Hell for the way I feel. But I can't change it I have tried... Any...
    shaunaleigh77 shaunaleigh77 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 23

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    I Don't Want to Be Gay

    i really don't, i want a wife and kids and i want to make love to my wife. i was normal and i didn't want to be attracted to guys. it makes me sad and i feel so alone. when i was in 8th grade i was molested and ever since i have been attracted to guys. i hate it, and i hate...
    lostandconfusedguy lostandconfusedguy 16-17 9 Responses Nov 4, 2008

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    Ever Since I Came Out...

    I have not been able to let go of all of this guilt for being gay. Right after I came out, I felt this really numb, neutral pit starting to well up in the middle in my chest. Essentially, my attraction to men has, like, diminished a lot. My attraction to women did not go up...
    neutralreaction neutralreaction 18-21 2 Responses Jan 5, 2012

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    Uncanny Queer

    I don't even know if this is the right way to put the way I feel towards my sexuality. I don't hate myself. I actually respect myself alot, almost too much. I just hate the fact that I have nothing in common with most homosexuals. I don't go to clubs every weekend, I don't listen...
    CatalystReverie CatalystReverie 26-30, M 9 Responses Aug 10, 2007

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    I Am A Flaming Homosexual.

    I hate homosexuals but I just love men so ******* much.  I keep trying to stop but its just so addicting.  I am such a weak person for not being able to control myself.  **** it, I LOVE MEN.
    poppintags08 poppintags08 18-21, M 5 Responses Feb 19, 2010

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    25 Years Of Existence...

    Hi. I just discovered today this website and I find it interesting and helpful to many people including me, hoping to share my experience and others will learn from it and I as well from you guys. I am an "open" and simple homosexual to start with. Open because i grew up being...
    Domzhie Domzhie 26-30, M 1 Response Aug 24, 2013

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    My Girlfriend Is

    My girlfriend really is sort of hating the fact that she's homosexual. Not because she doesn't like homosexuals or something. She just hates all the stereotypes that are sticked to her. And she hates women. She thinks women are more attractive, but in the end men are a lot easier...
    GothGrrrl GothGrrrl 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 18, 2007

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    Related Experiences

    I remember reading an old picture that I drew. It said " Love myself and my mom." I've lost that genuine love for myself when I turned 8. I would also be out of place my whole life...
    jellyrolls34 jellyrolls34 18-21, F Aug 31

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    I can't remember the last time I looked in the mirror and thought I looked good. In fact, I don't look in the mirror full stop as I'm scared it will crack. I am so self conscious...
    HollowHeart17 HollowHeart17 16-17, F 1 Response 5 hrs ago

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    I believe homosexuality is a sin. 25 years ago there were gays but most people I ran into thought it was wrong. I know a lot of people today still do but they are afraid to openly...
    Shellybelle Shellybelle 41-45, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    I believe homosexuality is a sin. 25 years ago there were gays but most people I ran into thought it was wrong. I know a lot of people today still do but they are afraid to openly...
    Shellybelle Shellybelle 41-45, F 3 Responses a week ago

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    So, I had been self harming for about 3 years, but I only started "cutting" this year, and my friends noticed the scars and tried to get me to stop. So I told them I had and just...
    ItalicHail ItalicHail 16-17, M 1 Response 14 hrs ago

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    some people say it's a mental disorder. I don't know if it's true but taking selfies actually makes me feel good about myself.
    kittywolfeyes kittywolfeyes 16-17, F 2 Responses 4 hrs ago

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    Gay people are like unicorns. Or the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. But if you close your eyes and just believe, just think really hard about two things that are hard (or...
    adianoeta adianoeta 26-30, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    I've always been a gentle and quite person. I rarely got angry... I was just sad. I read about people who were always angry because of their depression. I never understood till now...
    FullHotel FullHotel 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 19

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    I'm just really hating myself tonight. I do live streams on twitch every now and then, and I just got started really. But I'm just no good with them. I feel like I'm too much of...
    CloudStrife CloudStrife 22-25, M Aug 30

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    The growing trend of taking smartphone selfies is linked to mental health conditions that focus on a person’s obsession with looks. According to psychiatrist Dr David Veal...
    MFBG MFBG 61-65, M 6 days ago

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    One of the most unattractive qualities in people is being too selfish and self absorbed to understand others or see things from a more objective and realistic perspective. Being so...
    shannonymous shannonymous 18-21, F 2 Responses Sep 1

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    Ok, some people believe self harm is only cutting yourself. But let me tell you self harm can be done in so many more ways. I've always had an issue with anger, and a big one at...
    Redmaynes Redmaynes 18-21, M 1 Response Aug 20

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    I have discovered that this is my biggest flaw and challenge in life. Low self-esteem truly affects me and causes me both physical and mental distress that is unbearable much of...
    misscoffee misscoffee 22-25, F 2 Responses Aug 21

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    Have you cut or deliberately injured yourself in the past year? We invite you to share your experience by participating in a quick online study to learn more about people’s...
    uwyoresearcher uwyoresearcher 22-25, F Aug 22

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    Selfie here, selfie there, here selfie there selfie everywhere a selfie. Hahahaha (;
    Country00Girl Country00Girl 18-21, F 2 Responses Aug 25

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    i think to be selfish in some extent is not bad ,because u can help any one only when u help ur self ,we are bound to do work for our selves first rather than anyone else whether...
    rev429 rev429 18-21, M Aug 29

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    EP, the land of SELFIES......S-Selection....so crucial to a posted selfie....looking your best is the keyE-Elimination....eliminate the flaws and expose your inner beautyL...
    desirabledreams desirabledreams 46-50, F 1 Response Aug 30

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    I'm reading an amazing book tonight, entitled "Boundaries and Relationships: Knowing, Protecting, and Enjoying the Self". One part of it made me cry because I just cannot believe...
    mistletoe41 mistletoe41 41-45, F Sep 3

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    I find nothing wrong with self harm like most people do. The only thing I find wrong with self harm is what lies beneath it but not the actually self harm itself. Like, I cut...
    starryxo starryxo 22-25 2 Responses Sep 7

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    Cutting is one of the most misunderstood human behaviors. And like any addiction, cutting is an extremely difficult thing to stop. We can become addicted to the chemicals that our...
    findmeholdmeloveme findmeholdmeloveme 18-21 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I honestly don't really know if it's official or not, and I don't want to go to a doctor. I think I'm fine managing by myself. I started to have bad anxiety/depression since last...
    AwfullyRad AwfullyRad 13-15, F 1 Response 1 day ago

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    "If it is detrimental to you emotionally, physically and spiritually… what choice do you have left but to let go and flourish with self-respect." — Dodinsky
    lovingRIZA lovingRIZA 51-55, F Aug 21

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    #selfie lol I love taking selfies but I hate the girls that go overboard and take like 1000 selfies a day :/ like seriously go away haha
    Karianne6614 Karianne6614 16-17, F 6 Responses Aug 25

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    I'm not proud of it. I started self harming when I was 14 years old. I didn't hurt myself, and it wasn't very often. It started getting really bad while I was 15, my parents had a...
    CemoneDC CemoneDC 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 26

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    I had wrote about this earlier this morning then deleted it... when I self harm which isn't alot I usually burn myself on my right arm. So I burned myself with a lighter a couple...
    becarae becarae 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 29

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    My goal: to be the person I want to be with in more ways then one... With this in mind I find myself getting anxiety from a place of self perfectionism, but then I take a step...
    mzwhat mzwhat 26-30, F 1 Response Aug 31

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    i dont really have much self esteem anymore. i used to be really fat but even then, I was happy and I felt pretty. nowdays, i dont. it's like, everyone tells me im pretty and that...
    TrueLondon TrueLondon 18-21, F Sep 3

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    This is a Poem that i wrote, I never write or do anything like that. I've been feeling depressed so i wrote down what i was thinking. This is a Personal Poem about how I feel...
    Nick54 Nick54 18-21, M 1 Response Sep 3

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    There was a small time in my life that my confidence started to bloom. I modeled for a few photographers, I was happy with the way I looked minus a few things if course. I...
    MarKri MarKri 22-25, F Sep 7

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    Unno i just saw someone post something on instagram and its just so true i wanted to say it here because i thought it was relevant.. "When someones self concious everyone tells...
    Karmalama Karmalama 13-15, F a week ago

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    My parents check my wrists from time to time, so I can't cut there :( I want to so bad, I think it would feel loads better than cutting my thighs. Today I did a large burn, right...
    HorizonHeart HorizonHeart 13-15, F 3 Responses Aug 19

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    I'm a **** up to this world , my family hates me I hate me , I'm beginning to think that if I was just gone no one would care . All I do is mess **** up I can't even be a proper...
    HaddyT HaddyT 13-15, F 4 Responses Aug 20

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    I takes selfies because I'm gorgeous. :) lol #SelfieQueen
    Rayven1997 Rayven1997 16-17, F 4 Responses Aug 20

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    Omg I'm a selfie finatic!!! I'm always taking selfies lol
    Country00Girl Country00Girl 18-21, F 7 Responses Aug 20

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    Every time i see someone that stands out from the crowd it really puts a smile on my face, not because i find it funny but because they have the self confidence to dress, act, look...
    abby9305 abby9305 13-15, F 2 Responses Aug 22

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    I used self harm for attention, and then it soon became more like an addiction so I started keeping it to myself. I now have stopped and Im almost a year clean :) I'm so glad I got...
    zennarts zennarts 13-15, F 1 Response Aug 24

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    The world continues to move around me. The chatter, the frenzy, the seeking, the competition. What is it that each of us is striving for? How many are even aware? Or are we just...
    mistletoe41 mistletoe41 41-45, F 2 Responses Aug 24

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