Post
Experience Project iOS Android Apps | Download EP for your Mobile Device

I Am a Self Hating Homosexual

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 72 People

    Well, I am 19. I have been out

    for almost 2 years and I have had a girlfriend for over a year. But I can't help but hate myself I hate who I am and that I love her. I don't want to leave her. But I feel like god hates me and I am going to Hell for the way I feel. But I can't change it I have tried... Any...
    shaunaleigh77 shaunaleigh77 18-21, F 2 Responses Mar 23, 2014

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Well

    well, im here for all the same reasons you guys are..and the title of this whole page kinda gives it away so i aint gunna explain myself. yeah im a self hating gay, i hate being gay, i hate gays, i hate the scene, and basically i dont actually know what to do. its not really an...
    russdy russdy 18-21 5 Responses Sep 19, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    My Girlfriend Is

    My girlfriend really is sort of hating the fact that she's homosexual. Not because she doesn't like homosexuals or something. She just hates all the stereotypes that are sticked to her. And she hates women. She thinks women are more attractive, but in the end men are a lot easier...
    GothGrrrl GothGrrrl 18-21, F 4 Responses Jul 18, 2007

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Uncertainty About My Sexuality

    Hey.. First of all it felt so good that i found out that im not the only one wgo struggles.. Im 16 years of age and i've struggled for the last few years since i was oriented into these homosexual temptations.. And its so hard.. Im still struggling to fight it.. Sometimes it just...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jan 18, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    My Parents Hate Me

    Before I came out of the closet I was their pride and joy: they bragged about me to their friends, they told me they loved me ten times a day and they showered me in affection. When I did come out, they couldn't believe it-- I'm "too beautiful to be a lesbian!" Now, they berate...
    PrettyLion PrettyLion 13-15, F 4 Responses Sep 23, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    25 Years Of Existence...

    Hi. I just discovered today this website and I find it interesting and helpful to many people including me, hoping to share my experience and others will learn from it and I as well from you guys. I am an "open" and simple homosexual to start with. Open because i grew up being...
    Domzhie Domzhie 26-30, M 3 Responses Aug 24, 2013

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Don't Want to Be Gay

    i really don't, i want a wife and kids and i want to make love to my wife. i was normal and i didn't want to be attracted to guys. it makes me sad and i feel so alone. when i was in 8th grade i was molested and ever since i have been attracted to guys. i hate it, and i hate...
    lostandconfusedguy lostandconfusedguy 16-17 10 Responses Nov 4, 2008

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Hate Wat I Feel ...

     i really wish i was different. I dont like wat i feel is against my personal beliefs.. but sometimes i feel like its really hard to control wat i feel. Why cant i just be normal ?
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Jan 26, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Uncanny Queer

    I don't even know if this is the right way to put the way I feel towards my sexuality. I don't hate myself. I actually respect myself alot, almost too much. I just hate the fact that I have nothing in common with most homosexuals. I don't go to clubs every weekend, I don't listen...
    CatalystReverie CatalystReverie 26-30, M 9 Responses Aug 10, 2007

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Ever Since I Came Out...

    I have not been able to let go of all of this guilt for being gay. Right after I came out, I felt this really numb, neutral pit starting to well up in the middle in my chest. Essentially, my attraction to men has, like, diminished a lot. My attraction to women did not go up...
    neutralreaction neutralreaction 18-21 3 Responses Jan 5, 2012

    Your Response

    Cancel

    I Am A Flaming Homosexual.

    I hate homosexuals but I just love men so ******* much.  I keep trying to stop but its just so addicting.  I am such a weak person for not being able to control myself.  **** it, I LOVE MEN.
    poppintags08 poppintags08 18-21, M 6 Responses Feb 19, 2010

    Your Response

    Cancel

    Related Experiences

    When I was severely depressed I used to self harm ever single day. Some days it was really bad and other days it was just light cuts. It moved from my arms to my legs. Especially...
    gm126 gm126 16-17, F 1 Response Feb 19

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I've always had no confidence and low self esteem because my whole life I have been told that I'm fat and need to lose weight when in reality I was actually at a healthy weight all...
    Thatonegreyeyedgirl Thatonegreyeyedgirl 18-21, F 1 Response 1 day ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Took this selfie today.
    Donna717 Donna717 36-40, F 1 Response 7 hrs ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I am really sick of feeling like a failure all of the time. I'm tired of wanting to die every time I make a mistake. The reason why I feel this way is because all of my peers treat...
    charlieisme charlieisme 16-17, F 2 Responses Feb 7

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I've become so used to hating myself, that it feels safer to hate myself. Whatever I do, I always try to blame myself for everything that goes wrong and I always feel like I haven...
    Darejani Darejani 18-21, F 1 Response 4 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    FACING THE PROBLEM: ME Today is January 2, 2015. It is 6 AM in the morning and I have not yet gone to bed. Earlier, I had been in my sister's room looking up something on my tablet...
    girlunknownyet girlunknownyet 18-21, F Jan 31

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have been self harming since I was 12, I am about to be 21. The last time I harmed was a month ago and I made one big deep cut that should've had stitches because the scar now is...
    avey10 avey10 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 4

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Selfish people have a very narrow focus. They are focused on getting what they want, when they want it. Instead of seeing others' opinions, feelings, and desires as guides ( things...
    Zelaleme Zelaleme 46-50, F Feb 8

    Your Response

    Cancel
    So many people in my age group are beginning to self harm and it makes me sick. I wish I could stop. This is my story: When I was younger, I would look at self harmers and go, "My...
    lily13576349 lily13576349 13-15, F Feb 17

    Your Response

    Cancel
    not in the meaning of selfish but I spend 70% of my day time alone in my work I tried not to talk to others I left home some times I stop the car and set with my self I love my...
    tetomni tetomni 31-35, M 1 Response Feb 10

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Do you ever feel like because people know you self harm you have to self harm badly to be worthy of help, like otherwise you're not upset enough, stressed enough of important...
    BellaE15 BellaE15 16-17, F 3 Responses Jan 27

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Even if I preach things such as "Everyone is perfect the way they are in their own special way" or "Everyone is beautiful in their own special way" I can never hearken to those...
    losingNemo losingNemo 13-15, F 2 Responses Feb 1

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I recently read this commentary by Joyce Meyer in "The Everyday Life Bible". It really blessed me and I wanted to share this with my EP friends and pray it is a blessing to you as...
    sunnycaramelo sunnycaramelo 46-50, F 1 Response Feb 1

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I love taking selfies every time I'm in the mood. I don't know but I do take selfies in public or crowd. I love to make faces on taking selfies.
    RedThatDescribesMe RedThatDescribesMe 18-21, F 2 Responses Feb 2

    Your Response

    Cancel
    For starters Hi I'm Noah (: I have been self harming for 8+ years and recently I have met someone awesome but because of us being intimate I was forced to stop self harming...
    NoahVolley NoahVolley 18-21, M Feb 3

    Your Response

    Cancel
    There is this guy in my school who we'll just call Adam for privacy's sake. We used to be really close friends when we were little but the only thing that I think I've ever even...
    HypoallergenicUnicorn HypoallergenicUnicorn 13-15, F Feb 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    People who have self respect and act in a respectful, decent and dignified way are those that I then in turn respect. Took me a long long time to learn this. If you have self...
    nunos nunos 51-55, M 2 Responses a week ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I always try to exercise my honesty towards myself. Additionally, there are moments that I indulge with my vanity. One of which is taking pictures of my self aka "selfies". I...
    BloviatingBuffoon BloviatingBuffoon 70+, F 8 Responses 2 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I want to feel good about my self a little more, since my heartbreak I have been wondering and feeling like I'm not good enough to be someone's girlfriend and this brings me down a...
    Marlenyfl83 Marlenyfl83 26-30, F 4 Responses Jan 28

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Yesterday I was 6 months self-harm free...today, new cuts burn my thighs. I let ana and mia let me cut myself again. I love ana and mia, but cutting wasn't supposed to happen again...
    darebearsworld darebearsworld 16-17, F Jan 30

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Selfies are dripping with attention and and acceptance of appearance. Rather it be from Facebook, instergram and EP it's just plain annoying 1. No one forgets what you looked...
    XwonderlustX XwonderlustX 26-30, F 1 Response Jan 30

    Your Response

    Cancel
    So at night Bert says he can't sleep bc his back hurts(due to his back injury) and so he's gonna play a little Xbox until he gets tired enough to fall asleep no big deal right? I...
    AiymaSnikies AiymaSnikies 22-25, F Jan 30

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have had dogs all my life and love them and treat them like part of the family . I have noticed more and more lately how many inconsiderate and selfish dog owners there are . I...
    beastman111 beastman111 46-50, M Jan 31

    Your Response

    Cancel
    selfies are this generation selfies are life bb
    mysteriousnite mysteriousnite 13-15, F Feb 1

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I wonder what's the deal with young people and their work ethics?? It's like they don't even know the definition of ethics!! I'm on this site fixing the stuffs up done by...
    h4n5dj22 h4n5dj22 26-30, M 3 Responses Feb 4

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Trying so hard not to tonight, damn I really messed it up. The woman of my dreams and I are on a break because I can't quit smoking. She doesn't understand that it's a form of self...
    nohopekid nohopekid 18-21, M 1 Response Feb 5

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Why idk. But I have an entire album of hundreds of selfies. If I ever go missing the police will have a very wide selection of photos to pick from for my missing persons poster. I...
    Daring2care4u Daring2care4u 26-30 2 Responses Feb 7

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I am not self confident at all because I got a round face ,I really hate that ,but I can't change anything as I was born to be kind of that , I can't even look up person when I...
    jessicatong jessicatong 22-25, F 14 Responses Feb 8

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Dear self-confidence, I miss you a lot. Specially in these periods of hard working. Building up self-confidence is difficult, I do sport, I try to stay positive, I try to be myself...
    CrookedMat CrookedMat 26-30, M 4 Responses Feb 8

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Hello Internet world- it's been a good year or two since I've posted, so I was in a 4 year relationship with a guy (name will be unknown) I loved him, moved in with him, and as...
    Foreveranangel Foreveranangel 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 12

    Your Response

    Cancel
    i used to have self confident when i was younger but when i hit puberty it changed. all the other girls had better developed bodies and got boyfriends so easily and i never got any...
    avalily avalily 18-21, F Feb 14

    Your Response

    Cancel
    Another selfie,my page is full of them but I'm not self obsessed honest!
    Louisexoxo Louisexoxo 18-21, F 3 Responses Feb 15

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I have been called a selfish ***** more times then I can't count in the past month. It's okay to be selfish when you lose loved ones and "friends" turn their back on you...
    katariffik katariffik 31-35, F 3 Responses Feb 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I've been self harming since 7th grade. I'm currently a sophomore in Highschool and I don't do it as often but I still get strong urges to do it all the time. My mom knows that I...
    Gerardfuckinway Gerardfuckinway 18-21, F 1 Response Feb 18

    Your Response

    Cancel
    I struggled for a few years with self-harm, not limited to just cutting. I kept falling and got so tired of trying for long, just trying to stop. I realized after a while that you...
    burningcolors burningcolors 16-17, F 5 days ago

    Your Response

    Cancel