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I Am a Suicide Survivor

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,946 People

    my first suicide was my worst,

    I was 14. I was staying the night at my friends house with 4 other people. Every single one of them knew I was suicidal and had several bottles of pills with me. They did nothing. it was about 8am when everyone fell asleep. I picked a bottle that had a lot of small pills in it...
    theperksofbeinghayden theperksofbeinghayden
    18-21, T
    1 Response Oct 20, 2014

    I'm glad to say that I'm a suicide survivor .

    .. And I hope that you are too! Happy suicide prevention day :)
    pansexualgirl pansexualgirl
    16-17, F
    4 Responses Sep 10, 2015

    Not very happy about surviving,

    but thinking about my parents upset faces in the hospital and after discovering the cuts on various occasions, I think again. But I wonder for how long I can hold on to those thoughts? Especially since I have no friends or any social life. What's the point of living? Parents won...
    Lonelyndepressedgirl Lonelyndepressedgirl
    22-25, F
    3 Responses Aug 6, 2014

    my attempts were never thought out.

    which scares me. it was an extremely quick impulse on how I was going to do it and I did it at that moment. it was like I never had a chance to think about what I was doing. it's obvious because I'm petrified of the dark, drowning, and being in deep water. and that's exactly...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Nov 19, 2015

    I once survived near death suicide,

    i cut my throat with a carrott
    RudeMeanie RudeMeanie
    22-25, M
    1 Response Jan 27, 2016

    I attempted suicide twice

    when I was 16. First time was with sleeping pills, I had swallowed around 30 of them but for some reason I didn't die. I think it was because they were made of natural ingredients. The second time I wanted to make sure I would do it correctly and swallowed mercury from 8...
    RandomDude47 RandomDude47
    26-30, M
    Feb 2, 2016

    Okay, so there are a lot of things I don’t

    want to talk about. One of the things being my sister, or suicide in general. Rachel was amazing in every way, and I know her death hurt a lot of people. But honestly, I think my grandma, grandpa, and I got the worse of it. No one else had to look into her dead eyes. No one else...
    JustADinosaur JustADinosaur
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Mar 1, 2015

    I need blood and pain,

    most of all, I need death.
    ihatemegirl ihatemegirl
    22-25, F
    Jun 10, 2015

    My teen daughter committed suicide last year,

    and I wrote a book that's being published in 2015 about it : "Once The Storm Is Over: From Grieving To Healing After The Suicide of My Daughter." I'd like to hear from people dealing with depression and thoughts of suicide, and also people who have lost someone because of...
    ninabingham ninabingham
    51-55, F
    6 Responses Aug 29, 2014
    ihatemegirl ihatemegirl
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 3, 2015
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Jul 3, 2015

    one person a thousand thoughtsone heart a

    million piecesone word a thousand tearsone blade endless cutsone life a thousand suicide attempts
    littlelife0 littlelife0
    16-17, F
    Feb 20, 2016

    I came close to killing myself close to

    half-a-dozen times that I can remember. The ONLY reason I'm still alive is a) a lack of means and b) a fear of dying. Without those 2, I wouldn't be here today
    AsYetNameless AsYetNameless
    16-17, T
    Apr 18, 2016

    Its not just thinking about it,

    for the past month I had everything planned out including my letters to friends and family, the date I was going to do it and how I was going to do it. Jan 14, 2016 was the day I was supposed to die. I went to the frozen lake, sat down and took 4 sleeping aid pills to help...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Jan 15, 2016

    I am a depression and suicide attempt survivor

    and this is my story. (This is super long, so if you just want to skip my story and get to what I actually have to say about it, you can skip to the line that starts with "First off", and if YOU REALLY don't want to read this long thing, you don't have to or you can just skip...
    evie2001 evie2001
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Nov 15, 2015

    When I was 19 I was going through the most

    traumatic time of my life, I was dumped for someone else, I was kicked out of home, I was involved in a life of crime, I felt like there was no room for love in my life, hate took over. I was battling speed, cocaine and heroin addiction (non I.v.) one week I felt like I crossed...
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Jan 18, 2015

    I've been putting this off

    for a long time, but since experience project is shutting down I decided I better get it off my chest. January 27, 2015, my boyfriend hanged himself in his closet. Since that day my life has been a daily struggle. Mental facilities, thousands of pills, pieces of myself I can...
    amandaszynk amandaszynk
    18-21, F
    1 Response Apr 1, 2016

    I keep thinking how different their lives would

    be if my mum hadn't found me. My parents out of their minds with grief, at least for a little while. My five year old brother, having to grow up not understanding why his big sister was there one day but gone the next. My friends, just in shock. My cousin roaming around free...
    betruetoyourself14 betruetoyourself14
    16-17, F
    2 Responses Apr 12, 2015

    I tried a drug overdose a few years ago.

    This is what you get for not having a successful life, being broke, having epilepsy, not having much of a social life, and being home alone. I remind myself that this may not be over yet, even though it feels like the end.
    JK7452 JK7452
    22-25, F
    Sep 11, 2015

    I don't really tell many people this

    but when I tried committing suicide January 22 of this year, it wasn't my first time. I've attempted suicide a total of 11 times in my life. The first time was when I was 8 or 9. Now most kids that age wouldn't understand anything like that, but I'm not your average 16 1/2 year...
    swtchks97 swtchks97
    18-21, F
    2 Responses Jun 19, 2014

    ever since I turned 14 my life feels like I'm

    on a downward spiral because of suicide. I remember my first suicide attempt was really stupid. I overdosed and didn't die I felt really bad.fast forward to today.a couple days ago I was sitting a top a bridge ready to jump but I didn't. ended up at the er which I hate.they did...
    deleted deleted
    Oct 20, 2014


    August 28 2012. Dear me, It's been a while since that horrible day. The day that changed who you were forever. Made you a bitter, hateful, vunerable human being. You've gone through a lot of traumatic experiences, but did it really have to lead up to...
    deleted deleted
    4 Responses Jun 9, 2013

    On April 26, 2014, I lost my beloved mother to

    suicide. I was the one that found her hanging by the neck from our attic. That picture will never leave my head or heart. I did everything I knew to do to save her but it was too late. Due to the lack of oxygen to her brain, she was determined brain dead with a 0% recovery rate...
    sarahmunoz14 sarahmunoz14
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Nov 8, 2014

    I am seventeen and just over a month ago I

    attempted suicide. The difference of course is that no one knows about it. I've been depressed for a long time I can tell you, and I've fantasied killing myself as well as dipping in and out of various methods of self harm for years. There have been ups and downs, perks and...
    annie221 annie221
    18-21, F
    1 Response Dec 18, 2015

    Nearly for years ago a suicide attempt left me

    with 61% full thickness burns to length of my body.. looking for other survivors with similar experience, there are lots of burn survivor sites but never feel comfortable as mine were not an accident or an attack they were self inflicted and I now live with that would be great...
    darkenbee darkenbee
    31-35, F
    Apr 5, 2016
    deleted deleted
    3 Responses Mar 25, 2016

    http://youtu.be/WcSUs9iZv-g This guy survived

    jumping the Golden Gate Bridge.
    BrokeAssBxtch BrokeAssBxtch
    18-21, F
    Dec 9, 2015

    First time I pleaded with God to kill me I was

    8 years old. Attempted suicide at the age of 19 three years ago. I overdosed on over 50 pills of 8 different kinds, mostly heavy prescriptions I saved up over the years. I almost died. my friend had a feeling he had to come to my apartment, and it was just in time. he picked me...
    Brittaney9999 Brittaney9999
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Sep 14, 2015

    I don't want to write this

    for sympathy or attention hence it being written here. In January 2011 I made my last suicide attempt, my partner found me, close to passing out from a over dose, to this day i still remember the look of hurt and worry in his eyes, he made me throw up by sticking his...
    tash901 tash901
    22-25, F
    1 Response Oct 25, 2015

    I haven't been able to get my life moving much

    since about junior high. Since then, my life has been hobbling a long on one broken leg. I tried different things: college, getting a job, finding a relationship. Nothing seems to work out for me, especially with my mood swings. I don't get along well with others, because I don...
    GorillaToeMan GorillaToeMan
    26-30, T
    Mar 25, 2016

    In late feb this year I tried to overdose on

    some pills I had in my room and I was so sick of the way my life was heading and I just gave up. I gave up on trying to find the source of my problems and overcoming them. It was such a challenge to even wrap my head around the thought of making a change in my life. So I...
    sourwatermelon sourwatermelon
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Apr 10, 2014

    I lived in a prison. This prison I called home

    was unlike any other. You see I was the prisoner but I was also the guard. I "tried" hard to escape but I was fighting myself for freedom. I said when I felt freedom. I decided when I needed to be punished. Now you see I may have been the guard but I never saw the key. I tried...
    Beautifullybeloved Beautifullybeloved
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Sep 27, 2015

    31 years today my Dale took his life to find

    peace. I was thinking this morning about what I was doing that day - I can remember so much, and then almost nothing. Dale and I were affectionate, and so I have no regret about that. I tried to help him, but resources back then were very limited - knowledge and acceptance of...
    kitty1958 kitty1958
    56-60, F
    Nov 7, 2014

    I am a suicide survivor.

    September 9th 2011 I had a serious suicide attempt on a bridge. I landed 53 feet. I am now able to walk, but there's a lot I will never be able to do again :( I SOOO wish I could go back in time and never have had that day happen. But then again, it could have ended worse. I...
    ElizabethC1983 ElizabethC1983
    31-35, F
    1 Response Feb 15, 2014

    My story isn't as depressing

    as most people's, but screw it here it is. I tried to kill myself on March 11th when I was twelve years old. This is going to be extremely explicit, just to warn you. I had a terrible day. I skipped school that day because I wanted to cut and I was at my grandmother's. To sum...
    SuicidalAngelic SuicidalAngelic
    16-17, F
    1 Response Oct 20, 2015

    Hello. I'm 14 years old

    and somewhere around the end of may I tried to kill myself. I was taken to a hospital where they monitor you and any thoughts you might have of suicide. I was put on a medication called Prozac and had group therapy everyday with a bunch of other patients who I learned to call...
    snowballcupcake snowballcupcake
    16-17, F
    Jan 8, 2016

    Yesterday it made 6 months

    since I tried suicide and survive. I feel glad to say that I also survived all those 6 months.
    pansexualgirl pansexualgirl
    16-17, F
    May 25, 2015

    To others have attmepted

    or are thinking of committing suicide, please rethink your options. Whatever your situation is, it's only temporary and you can get through it. My first suicide attempt was when I was 8 years old and I've attempted three times and almost did it again in June. If you are alive to...
    deleted deleted
    1 Response Nov 15, 2015

    I killed myself when I was 12.

    I was dead. no pulse. The doctor didn't give up on me though and I thank him every week for not giving up.
    laurenzerbe laurenzerbe
    18-21, F
    1 Response Jul 25, 2015

    I was 12. Painfully shy,

    bullied at school,and the unfortunate child of indulgent yet narcissistic parents. Something sent me over the edge. Maybe I anticipated less than perfect Marks and feared punishment over it. For whatever reason I came home and took every pill I could find in the house and I do...
    Joha0505 Joha0505
    22-25, F
    Aug 24, 2014

    I attempted to kill myself at 15 due to

    enduring years of sexual abuse from my step father and my mother choosing to believe him over me. I still struggle with PTSD from the abuse and I'm sure the suicide attempt doesn't help but I am stronger because I have realized I am not better off dead. It's no use taking the...
    Mmn1229 Mmn1229
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jun 16, 2014

    Hello everyone. I'm currently working on a

    non-fiction piece about the desperation so many people face in our society today. The work revolves around my own attempt at suicide and the process of finding a better way to live in the aftermath. This subject, as you all well know from you own personal experience, is a...
    Jen4622 Jen4622
    36-40, F
    Feb 23, 2016

    My Story: Four Attempts

    I was raised to be an overachiever which made me stressed out by the time I was 8. By the time I was 11 I developed serious clinical depression. It made all my childish views of things that made the world a decent place all crumble down until all I had was this sadness and hatred...
    ingenuinesmiles ingenuinesmiles
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Nov 3, 2013

    i took about 100pills to end my life

    but it didn't work and my familly got me in the bathroom throwing up so then they found out about my depression and that i've been cutting and trying to suicide even after knowing that i'm strugling to stay alive they didn't bother to do anything to help me they started yelling...
    sandra1231 sandra1231
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Sep 29, 2015

    It Was A Stupid Mistake...

    It was 2 weeks before my 17th birthday. It was October, 2011, 5 monthes after I was in a traumatic event in may 2011. I was Kiddnapped and hurt really bad.. In ways I can't explain on the Internet cause I just can't, cause if I did then it would be always on here so more and more...
    itsjustbrit itsjustbrit
    18-21, F
    4 Responses Nov 11, 2013

    I've attempted 8 times

    and backed out of an attempt recently the other day, thanks to a few people on this website and my best friend. I am working on everything in order to make life better for myself and hopefully I'll be okay.
    katielandancer katielandancer
    18-21, F
    3 Responses Jan 3, 2014
    Poolofsouls Poolofsouls
    16-17, M
    1 Response Mar 26, 2016

    Today was the 86th day of me walking around

    school with a smile on my face, saying hi to all my friends, being drum major for the marching band.... No one suspects or knows... That 86 days ago I got 23 stitches down the side of my body because I wanted to end it all that bad...
    Nothingicandoaboutit Nothingicandoaboutit
    18-21, F
    May 27, 2015

    on friday at school, one of my classmates told

    me to go kill myself. that was... wow, just really horrible, considering what ive been through. i hope he learns someday that suicide is an actual problem and not something to just yell out at people you know nothing about
    kaliforniadreamin kaliforniadreamin
    18-21, T
    Jan 31, 2016

    5 years ago I attempted to take my life.

    ..I had enough of the bullying and the words and lost people on my life...then an elderly lady came to me and convinced me to not go through with it...I still don't know who she is to this day but she is the reason I am a believer in God now:) she was an incredible lady and I am...
    FriendlyCanadian321 FriendlyCanadian321
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Jun 23, 2014

    Sometimes when I'm fed up with my life I want

    to drive my car over a cliff. It does feel like an end to suffering but I would never do that .
    deleted deleted
    4 Responses Feb 24, 2016

    God do I even remember

    when it started? I just turned 19 and the shadows just wont leave me alone. No matter how long you've been recovering for it always seems like the only option. I don't want to go to uni, maybe I should die. I don't know what to do and I honestly don't believe this is going to...
    gingerkadie gingerkadie
    18-21, F
    Mar 24, 2016

    I remember one time I was sick,

    and I ran away into a forest close to home for some reason. I think it was because my mom was mad at me. Although it was summer, my temperaure was already pretty high, and after that I ended up in the hospital. I have run away from home for a couple of hours quite a few times. I...
    ThatOneDepressedKid ThatOneDepressedKid
    16-17, F
    Jan 28, 2016

    Strive. Good & Bad In Life.

    PLEASE READ ALL THRU> In May...my fiancee committed suicide.Even typing or saying the word suicide is hard. I think most of us in life do have the thought cross our minds...but dont fully consume what such an act can do. My fiancee was the biggest gentlemen and would help anyone...
    BabydollT BabydollT
    26-30, F
    10 Responses Sep 23, 2012

    2 months ago, i tried to commit suicide by

    hanging myself, i don't remember what exactly happened bcz i lost consciousness and then i found myself on the floor and my mouth was full of blood
    Onlyavampirecanloveu4ever Onlyavampirecanloveu4ever
    16-17, M
    4 Responses Apr 1, 2016

    I had a much more detailed story on here of my

    suicide attempts, but I deleted it because it isn't appropriate to share that level of detail. I made two attempts on my life, both very spontaneous. I was getting near the same level of depression just last night, which is troubling to say the least. Fortunately for me I had...
    crazytrain00 crazytrain00
    31-35, M
    2 Responses Feb 15, 2016

    I've always relied on my physical strength to

    get me through- even when my heart is pounding, head is spinning, my mind seems to be bending everything out of proportion and the only solution seems like silencing myself to silence the voices, I remember that I am a strong person because of my physical strength. I haven't...
    Floridagirlfaith Floridagirlfaith
    18-21, F
    1 Response Nov 24, 2015
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