I Am a Survivor of Domestic Violence

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,430 People

    Please could anyone who has been in a domestic

    abuse situation with children fill in my short anonymous survey :- http://www.smartsurvey.co.uk/s/ZID51/ it is for a research project and I would be very grateful :)
    hereat hereat
    36-40, F
    5 Responses Mar 1

    This story is part of my healing process.

    I thought I had beaten this years ago. I never thought about how much damage was caused by the men in my life. From the age of 4 things have been broken. Every abuse you can think of unfortunately I have experienced. But I thought I was OK. Then one day I started to take...
    valfree8121 valfree8121
    41-45, F
    Feb 24, 2015

    He had gotten into my face

    and called me a b**ch for the last time. He had pointed his fingers in my face and, shoved me for the last time. He had told me to shut the **** up and, threatened that one day, I would meet someone who really wouldn't like what comes out of my mouth and beat my a** for the last...
    Mfudgie Mfudgie
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Jul 10, 2015

    He has choked me, threw me across his living

    room... Slapped me.. Kicked me.. Said hes gona lock me in a basement.. Held his fists in my face, sayin hes gonna bash my skull in.. Im afraid of him, but I wish hed just change... And not be violent.
    amnotthattired amnotthattired
    26-30, F
    4 Responses Dec 1, 2015

    hello everyone, i hope you're all having a

    lovely day (: i'm not a survivor of domestic violence nor have i been in a domestic violence relationship, but i didn't no where else to post/ask for advice on this subject, i don't want to bring back any memories or upset anyone, i was just wondering what the first signs of...
    vikiii vikiii
    22-25, F
    7 Responses Feb 5, 2015

    My husband shot at me three times in front of

    our son. I caught one bullet to my neck. It was nearly fatal. Thank God for the responding officers. After nearly 30 years of marriage, you NEVER think some one you that would / could ever happen..
    Yonnie1 Yonnie1
    46-50, F
    Aug 8, 2015

    Its Not So Easy to Leave

    Twenty one years ago, I thought I met the man of my dreams.  He was handsome, worldly & very charismatic.  Our relationship was intense, exciting & passionate.  So when he asked me to marry him, I didn't even think for a second before I accepted. ...
    smileyone0329 smileyone0329
    36-40, F
    32 Responses Jun 27, 2008

    One memory in particular stands out to me.

    I’m not even sure why we were arguing. It’s actually pretty rare that I remember the cause of a fight. It could be over something as simple as how to properly load the dishwasher. We were yelling at each other. I can’t remember what he was saying, but he was smoking. I...
    emilyflys26 emilyflys26
    31-35
    1 Response Jun 24, 2015

    It's been 3 years since I left him.

    I am currently in a new wonderful relationship, but my past haunts me every single day. I've never reached out for support, and I worry that because I am still in the "victim closet" that my relationship will eventually suffer. So here I am. My new boyfriend knows of my past and...
    Erika88o Erika88o
    26-30
    2 Responses Jan 6, 2015

    My Abuse Story

    well i have struggled with my worth since i can remember never feeling good enough. i met a man, got married to him at a young age, at first he seemed amazing , gentle man and than he changed . the fighting , it started off with name calling , verbal abuse than mental than the...
    Aweir23 Aweir23
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Mar 8, 2013

    I am writing this to shed light on domestic

    violence and what happened to me. At first it was only on my Facebook and was set to "Friends Only" but I am now making it public and sharing it in other places. I'm not ashamed of what happened to me and if my story helps even one person get out of a dangerous relationship...
    Taylor62298 Taylor62298
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Oct 10, 2015

    i was with my ex husband 3 years he beat me on

    a daily basis it took for him to rape me and burn me with boiling hot water before i left him for good. i lost everything over them 3 years my children my home and my job i slowly have build my life back together i now have a home and my children back i can not yet work due to...
    claire2087 claire2087
    26-30, F
    1 Response Jul 14, 2015

    I'm going through a custody battle.

    But unfortunately I have very little evidence of abuse. Just a couple of people who saw the bruises. Has anyone gone through this? I'm in need of advice.
    taq1992 taq1992
    22-25, F
    1 Response Mar 4, 2015

    Love Hurts

    Tempers start to flare, two voices start to yell Insults fly this way and that way They have both had to many shots of scotch on the rocks She starts to cry she tells him its over because he has never Loved her, he could never grasp what it would take to love her because its...
    zen404 zen404
    22-25
    3 Responses Nov 25, 2013

    I'm A Survivor Of Domestic Violence

    I lived with my ex partner and our kids age 3 and 2 at the time, he never was aggressive towards me, then 1 day he changed after we got engaged he started telling me I was fat and I didn't look good, but I'm a confident person I took no notice, then he started accusing me of...
    marjorie21 marjorie21
    36-40, F
    1 Response Sep 28, 2013

    After only 1 month out of my abusive

    relationship with my ex-boyfriend, why do I care how he is doing? I want him to be well. To be helped with whatever issues that drove him to mistreating me to such extremes. I suppose I want him to be sorry for what he did - to be held responsible for his conduct and, most...
    lotusabloom lotusabloom
    36-40, F
    1 Response Jan 19, 2015

    I was with a man for 2 1/2 years,

    married him and took his last name. After we were married everything changed. About a month into our marriage the physical abuse started, first it was just pushing. Slowly it would turn into him making me feel like i had to have sex every time he wanted. He beat me and threaten...
    roughweather roughweather
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 20, 2015

    On The Other Side..

    As much as I had to share my nightmare story, my gradual climb back up, then the acceptance and step forward, I now feel the need to share my victory, I am now in a place in my life where: I am happy with who I am, can't remember ever having thought let alone said that... I am...
    simplylee simplylee
    46-50, F
    2 Responses Oct 5, 2011

    My ex emotionally, financially

    and physically abused m for many years. I've been out of that relationship past 3 years. I'm in a healthy relationship now, but I still have lingering issues. I got better at not being so startled, but I still over react when he raises his voice and misinterpret his intentions...
    Khrystyna1234 Khrystyna1234
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Aug 9, 2015

    Domestic Violence

    My article on Helium.com Running into the bathroom slamming the door and pushing my body close to it so he won't get in. His fist pound the door like a drum demanding me to let him in. As the room falls silent, I slide to the floor in tears waiting for a sign that he has left...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    5 Responses Mar 14, 2013

    10 days ago is when I got my freedom.

    When I had first met M, I knew he had a history of violent crimes and a short temper, but being a spitfire myself, I thought it was exciting. I had always been the jealous type, so when we established rules of always being able to look at each other's phones, monitor...
    Adayatatime23 Adayatatime23
    22-25, F
    1 Response May 26, 2014

    CULT SURVIVOR I grew up in a evangelical

    fundamentalist group that was ran by my "Family". I escaped child abuse, neglect and the rise of a religious cult. I am finally willing to share my story. The more it gets out there- The safer I am. PLEASE HELP.
    DestinyChangesC DestinyChangesC
    22-25, F
    Jul 9, 2015

    Hi there, I was hoping some one could help me

    out with a situation so I can better support my partner. My fiancée in her last relationship was subject to domestic violence for several years. She has suggested that I could better understand what she went through if I was to talk to other people who have been through...
    tryingtohelpfiancee tryingtohelpfiancee
    26-30, M
    4 Responses Apr 26, 2015

    Please could anyone who has been in a domestic

    abuse situation with children fill in my short anonymous survey :- http://www.smartsurvey.co.uk/s/ZID51/ it is for a research project and I would be very grateful :)
    hereat hereat
    36-40, F
    Mar 27

    I can truly say that domestic violence is more

    than physical. I can say that a husband can rape a wife. And I can say that I am a survivor. I am just getting out of a ten year marriage where the verbal and emotional abuse started almost immediately. And the sexual abuse soon followed. But it came on so gradually that I was...
    elizzy8 elizzy8
    31-35, F
    4 Responses Dec 30, 2013

    Jinell Jinell
    36-40, F
    Mar 31

    Today, my "permanent" protective order expires.

    A few thoughts: A "permanent" protective order shouldn't last only 2 years & it shouldn't be nearly as difficult to obtain one. But today I want to focus on a message to anyone out there that might be going through what I did: I know that asking you to leave is like asking...
    emilyflys26 emilyflys26
    31-35
    3 Responses Feb 9, 2015

    I am. I've been known

    as a **** my whole life. I moved to Italy to get a new identity. I fell inlove with a great guy at that time. After a year of our marriage i was being slapped for looking to pretty to other men. He raped me and left me in the street that night with just my bra on. People just...
    MissMckenzie MissMckenzie
    41-45, F
    3 Responses Dec 24, 2013

    Victim"...I hate that word.

    We are not "victims". We are some of the strongest, bravest women to walk the earth. We are survivors.  We are not stray helpless animals, we are the brave lioness. We endured the worst, we suffered, we hurt..yet we risked everything for freedom. We are survivors, not victims...
    TriciaFL TriciaFL
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Aug 29, 2014

    My son's father beat me up

    because he believes my family called CPS after he dropped our infant son. He said I deserved it. 2 years later he still claims to "love" me but when I bring up being afraid of him beating me up again he says I need to let it go.. (we are not together by the wag)
    BlackSheep613 BlackSheep613
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jun 28, 2015

    he won custody of our daughter,

    who he never had any interest in during our marriage, even though my daughter told the judge she wanted to be with me, the law guardian told the judge she was better with me and there was a long history of physical, mental and sexual abuse. the only reason anyone could give me...
    Khrysanthemum Khrysanthemum
    36-40, F
    1 Response Sep 18, 2015

    There Is A Tomorrow

    Hi Everybody i am a survivor of domestic abuse and i am now doing more than just surviving. I was a victim for 33years of physical (most of the bones in my body have been broken) mental, sexual and emotional abuse. I am asked "why didnt you leave" this comment makes me angry...
    sunrise58 sunrise58
    61-65
    2 Responses Feb 25, 2013

    I Survive I feel again No longer numb

    or broken inside I feel again Wanting to live, no longer wishing to die I feel again I sing again A simple song of freedom and happiness I sing again Loud and clear for everyone to hear I sing again I smile again My son, my friends, my life gives me joy I smile...
    breesusrocksmysocks breesusrocksmysocks
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Mar 9, 2014

    Local Escapes Domestic Violence, Becomes Entrepreneur

    This is MY Story. Standing Her Ground... (reprinted from WNY Women in Business; December 2009) By Nicole Gawel Twenty-two years. That was the length of time Suzanne Perry was abused, isolated and estranged from her family, friends and the world around...
    SuzannePerry SuzannePerry
    41-45, F
    6 Responses Aug 28, 2010

    Will You Be The Next Silent Witness

    A Silent Witness is a woman who has been killed due to domestic violence.  The Silent Witness organization presents life-sized red silhouettes of five women who died the previous year as a victim of domestic violence, and they are presented on the steps of our...
    silentwitness silentwitness
    46-50
    5 Responses Mar 4, 2010

    Its never really over.

    Once you get strength & courage to leave theres still this unexplainable fear you have then you feel anxiety overcome your body. You feel like you cant breathe, struggling. Only time & prayer can heal you.
    rachelmg rachelmg
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Mar 8, 2015

    A Childs Perspective.

    I saw my dad beat my mom once and that was enough to make me hate him. I was about 12 and I can remember it like it was yesterday. I kicked the door to their bedroom open and it hit him in the head as he tried to close it. He started shouting at my older brothers asking who...
    Scorpio1987 Scorpio1987
    22-25, M
    4 Responses Jun 5, 2012

    Another Scream From The Silence

    Fool me once is on you, fool me twice is on me, fool me three times ...I am just a donkey.   It happened to me not only once, but twice: When I was 20 years old, I fall in love with a man 14+ years older than me.  We not only have the age difference, but also a cultural...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    7 Responses Feb 26, 2011

    1 year without the abuse

    and without him in my life! I'm starting to find my real self again
    alimarie1 alimarie1
    22-25, F
    2 Responses May 22, 2014

    I'm moving and going through old papers in a

    bag at the bottom of the closet and it was a hospital release form for a facial contussion and police report filed a week later because I lied at the hospital saying I was attacked by a stranger. I also found a letter I wrote to no one but expressing my feelings during that time...
    MarvelMagic MarvelMagic
    31-35, F
    1 Response Oct 29, 2015

    What Is Fear?

    What is fear? It is not a stranger, for I have once played Fear in a game of chess. Fear harassed my 'knights' of will and 'pawns' of dignity. For each move Fear made, his sinister voice, whispering in my ear, "I will not stop hunting you," became louder and louder. Fear was...
    SelflessSheikah SelflessSheikah
    22-25, F
    1 Response Oct 14, 2013

    i was literally dying pasted out to wake up

    and c that the man i love so much punching and stomping me. once our baby cried i ran out the apartment while he had the baby. i held on to the car at a red light and begged for them to help me and the car took me to the police station and the station called me an ambulance.
    MedinaAbdul MedinaAbdul
    22-25, F
    Mar 28, 2015

    I'm fadia 17 years old My parents got divorced

    when I was one year old.. I lived with my grandmother... She passed away last year.. I was sad.. Heartbroken Alone.. But I really knew nothing My dad was "forced" to take me to live with him He was married and he had kids Then one day my step mother came and started...
    Fadia17 Fadia17
    16-17
    1 Response Feb 26

    Hi there. Almost three months

    since we split. I am back to my home country (I had moved to his country to be with him). My family and friends are awesome. They support me a lot. But somehow it is not enough. I miss my ex-bf so bad I feel I wouldn't mind if he killed me, as long as I could just spend some...
    LilMinn LilMinn
    22-25, F
    1 Response Mar 3, 2015

    Hindsight is 20/20. My mother often remarks that

    if she had allowed herself to see without rose glasses she wouldn't have remained with her ex husband for 2 months let alone 8 years! When she finally did see reality she ran with her children in tow and NEVER looked back! She just wanted her children and her freedom. He could...
    Menelek Menelek
    22-25, M
    Mar 10, 2015

    im alive and im grateful.

    but i went though hell broken bones, bruises, nasty remarks. i was so broken. 2 yrs later im finally able to start talking about it. i used to feel shame and it was my fault but now i know it wasnt my fault and i didnt deserve it. my mom beat me so abuse to me is normal. but...
    cooper3366 cooper3366
    31-35, F
    Apr 4, 2015

    I was in a abusive relationship

    for 2 years. I moved in with him and then the abuse started. He checked my phone, clothes every minute of the day. He was a cheater, liar and addicted to drugs. I was hit in public, infront of his friends and went to the police. No one helped. I knew if I stayed any longer, he...
    AbusedByYou AbusedByYou
    22-25, F
    6 Responses May 28, 2014

    Oh, by the way, I read this great book on

    Domestic Violence the other day "Beneath Dreary" (got it on google books).... Anyway if anyone knows of any good reads on the topic please share. Thanks
    AramatLynn AramatLynn
    51-55, F
    Jan 25, 2015

    We grew up together. I met my husband

    when we were 6. We were married when we were 21... and when I was 22 and pregnant with our daughter, he started pushing me around. Shortly after we were married, I discovered that my husband had a pretty severe *********** addiction. It wasn't so much the content that bothered...
    Sizzlebizzlebear Sizzlebizzlebear
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Jan 31, 2014

    I was a sophomore in college

    and he was a senior. Something about him being older made it feel so right…he was charming, mature, and the life of the party type of guy. Not to mention he was tall dark and handsome, everyone called him “Big Ben” because he was 6’5. I was a biology major, always...
    EmmaCollins EmmaCollins
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Jul 31, 2014

    I'm actually scared to see the man face 2 face

    i need some men in my life i wont think about it as much..
    MedinaAbdul MedinaAbdul
    22-25, F
    Apr 7, 2015

    Hatred With A Passion

       When I was a little boy all I ever wanted from my dad was a hug and to be told that he loved me. Instead all I ever got was beaten and for most of the time I never knew why I was being beaten with a belt he would remove from his waist. I'll never forget one specific time...
    michaelraybaker michaelraybaker
    46-50, M
    11 Responses Apr 12, 2012

    Lucky Escape

    When I met my husband he was so loving and gentle I never thought he could ever hurt me. After three years of marriage and the birth of our son he hit me for the first time, it was a slap across the face literally and shocked me to complete tears. I believed he was sorry and...
    Monkeynut1 Monkeynut1
    26-30
    Jun 19, 2013

    No More Abuse

    I was in a relationship for 7 years with what I thought was a great man, until one day!! He had done everything right (in my eyes) up until that point. I had noticed certain signs before, but refused to acknowledge it. Like the jealously became to be too much. See I was an...
    completenwhole completenwhole
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Oct 14, 2013

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