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I Am a Survivor of Domestic Violence

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 1,346 People

    The Sign On the Bathroom Wall

    A few weeks ago, I would have said that my husband was a little crazy, maybe a little over aggressive, somewhat of a control freak. But I would have never said I am a victim of Domestic Violence. Years ago we attended a formal gathering at an event hall, and in...
    neverunderestimate neverunderestimate 26-30, F 4 Responses Sep 3, 2009

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    I used to see myself

    as a victim but I know I'm a survivor but still feel trapped my ex abused me for 4 years physically mentally emotionally and financially cut me off from friends family I weighed a poxy 6 stone never had anything nice he constantly made me feel like I was nothing best feeling...
    MeganLouise1990 MeganLouise1990 22-25, F 1 Response Jun 17, 2014

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    1 year without the abuse

    and without him in my life! I'm starting to find my real self again
    alimarie1 alimarie1 22-25, F 2 Responses May 22, 2014

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    I was in a abusive relationship

    for 2 years. I moved in with him and then the abuse started. He checked my phone, clothes every minute of the day. He was a cheater, liar and addicted to drugs. I was hit in public, infront of his friends and went to the police. No one helped. I knew if I stayed any longer, he...
    AbusedByYou AbusedByYou 22-25, F 6 Responses May 28, 2014

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    Escape From Abuse

    My story was front page news. You can read it at: http://www.newsregister.com/news/results.cfm?story_no=199195   I am AWESOME! Awesome stands for: Abused Women Everywhere Speaking Out Making Examples
    oinvu4uraqt oinvu4uraqt 31-35 5 Responses Jul 3, 2008

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    Hatred With A Passion

       When I was a little boy all I ever wanted from my dad was a hug and to be told that he loved me. Instead all I ever got was beaten and for most of the time I never knew why I was being beaten with a belt he would remove from his waist. I'll never forget one specific time...
    michaelraybaker michaelraybaker 46-50, M 11 Responses Apr 12, 2012

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    10 days ago is when I got my freedom.

    When I had first met M, I knew he had a history of violent crimes and a short temper, but being a spitfire myself, I thought it was exciting. I had always been the jealous type, so when we established rules of always being able to look at each other's phones, monitor...
    Adayatatime23 Adayatatime23 22-25, F 1 Response May 26, 2014

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    I'm A Survivor Of Domestic Violence

    I lived with my ex partner and our kids age 3 and 2 at the time, he never was aggressive towards me, then 1 day he changed after we got engaged he started telling me I was fat and I didn't look good, but I'm a confident person I took no notice, then he started accusing me of...
    marjorie21 marjorie21 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 28, 2013

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    No More Abuse

    I was in a relationship for 7 years with what I thought was a great man, until one day!! He had done everything right (in my eyes) up until that point. I had noticed certain signs before, but refused to acknowledge it. Like the jealously became to be too much. See I was an...
    completenwhole completenwhole 36-40, F 2 Responses Oct 14, 2013

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    If anyone out there is survivor

    or going through domestic abuse and would like to talk or be listened to by some one who understands. Looking for understanding people who have had similar experiences and how they learned to cope. X
    tazygirl tazygirl 18-21, F 3 Responses Aug 31, 2014

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    My ex, in the past couple years.

    .. Has choked me. Slapped me, fractured my ribs.. Threw me across the room. . kicked me. And that was only the physical violence part of it all.... He was EXTREMELY emotionally abusive. Cuz he knows it has no evidence in a police report to just verbally assault someone.
    amtired amtired 22-25 13 Responses Jul 27, 2014

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    After only 1 month out of my abusive

    relationship with my ex-boyfriend, why do I care how he is doing? I want him to be well. To be helped with whatever issues that drove him to mistreating me to such extremes. I suppose I want him to be sorry for what he did - to be held responsible for his conduct and, most...
    lotusabloom lotusabloom 36-40, F 1 Response 6 days ago

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    You never get over it,

    you learn to cope then rebuild.. You never forget.. I will never foreget the feeling of sheer terror when his hands were around my neck.. The exact moment I began to panic as I tried to pull his hands away.. The day my sense of trust and safety were completely obliterated.. And...
    Memoriesremain Memoriesremain 26-30, F 1 Response Oct 7, 2014

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    Domestic Violence

    My article on Helium.com Running into the bathroom slamming the door and pushing my body close to it so he won't get in. His fist pound the door like a drum demanding me to let him in. As the room falls silent, I slide to the floor in tears waiting for a sign that he has left...
    lija30 lija30 31-35, F 6 Responses Mar 14, 2013

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    guidness24 guidness24 26-30 5 Responses Nov 13, 2014

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    i miss my ex abuser i dont know why.

    im going thru witgdrawl of a toxic relationship. its driving me crazy
    amtired amtired 22-25 2 Responses Nov 30, 2014

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    I left my abuser after 2 short years of

    marriage. He wasn't like this before we married, and I was widowed for 7 years prior to meeting him. He broke my nose in 2 places and it was the final blow, I am in treatment for a brain tumor and he would hit me in the head saying he doesn't care and wanted no part of my...
    Marie1958 Marie1958 56-60, F Jul 5, 2014

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    I did what I had to do.

    anything to avoid it. I guess I just got tired of it and saw no other way out. I could never leave you, I loved you too much. I was too weak for you. so I guess I set up this situation where you would hate me and leave me for good. I cheated. but it's hard to say I did because I...
    somegirl117 somegirl117 18-21 1 Response Dec 5, 2014

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    I've always struggled with accepting

    that I have been abused. My mother was abusive and I cut her out of my life 5 years ago. My husband was also abusive. I never ended up in the hospital from being abused though. Barely had any bruises. I see images and read stories all the time from survivors that really suffered...
    littlegiraffe13 littlegiraffe13 26-30, F 1 Response Nov 19, 2014

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    I loved you, but you hated me.

    It was terrifying not knowing what would set you off, and make you mad. I was scared not knowing when you would hit my mother or I. Eventually, I let go. The punches and kicks just became bruises, the scratches and cuts just became scabs. One day you curled your hand around...
    Maldif2015 Maldif2015 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 9, 2014

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    Love Hurts

    Tempers start to flare, two voices start to yell Insults fly this way and that way They have both had to many shots of scotch on the rocks She starts to cry she tells him its over because he has never Loved her, he could never grasp what it would take to love her because its...
    zen404 zen404 22-25 3 Responses Nov 25, 2013

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    Local Escapes Domestic Violence, Becomes Entrepreneur

    This is MY Story. Standing Her Ground... (reprinted from WNY Women in Business; December 2009) By Nicole Gawel Twenty-two years. That was the length of time Suzanne Perry was abused, isolated and estranged from her family, friends and the world around...
    SuzannePerry SuzannePerry 41-45, F 6 Responses Aug 28, 2010

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    What Is Fear?

    What is fear? It is not a stranger, for I have once played Fear in a game of chess. Fear harassed my 'knights' of will and 'pawns' of dignity. For each move Fear made, his sinister voice, whispering in my ear, "I will not stop hunting you," became louder and louder. Fear was...
    SelflessSheikah SelflessSheikah 22-25, F 1 Response Oct 14, 2013

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    There Is A Tomorrow

    Hi Everybody i am a survivor of domestic abuse and i am now doing more than just surviving. I was a victim for 33years of physical (most of the bones in my body have been broken) mental, sexual and emotional abuse. I am asked "why didnt you leave" this comment makes me angry...
    sunrise58 sunrise58 61-65 3 Responses Feb 25, 2013

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    Victim"...I hate that word.

    We are not "victims". We are some of the strongest, bravest women to walk the earth. We are survivors.  We are not stray helpless animals, we are the brave lioness. We endured the worst, we suffered, we hurt..yet we risked everything for freedom. We are survivors, not victims...
    TriciaFL TriciaFL 36-40, F 2 Responses Aug 29, 2014

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    Its Not So Easy to Leave

    Twenty one years ago, I thought I met the man of my dreams.  He was handsome, worldly & very charismatic.  Our relationship was intense, exciting & passionate.  So when he asked me to marry him, I didn't even think for a second before I accepted. ...
    smileyone0329 smileyone0329 36-40, F 32 Responses Jun 27, 2008

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    I was a sophomore in college

    and he was a senior. Something about him being older made it feel so right…he was charming, mature, and the life of the party type of guy. Not to mention he was tall dark and handsome, everyone called him “Big Ben” because he was 6’5. I was a biology major, always...
    EmmaCollins EmmaCollins 18-21, F 2 Responses Jul 31, 2014

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    I am not where I was yesterday .

    . Yes I still have a long road ahead of me being a survivor of domestic violence .. I pray and hope that I will never turn down that road again .. Staying strong prayed up an knowing there is a brighter future for myself ..
    jennz98 jennz98 36-40 Feb 21, 2014

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    I am not a recent survivor.

    I left my husband a little over three years ago. In some ways I am coping much better than three years ago. In other ways I am not. The euphoria of being free and finally getting out has worn off. About a year after I left, I felt the entire world was open to me. Now I...
    strongerwiser34 strongerwiser34 31-35, F Dec 30, 2014

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    Another Scream From The Silence

    Fool me once is on you, fool me twice is on me, fool me three times ...I am just a donkey.   It happened to me not only once, but twice: When I was 20 years old, I fall in love with a man 14+ years older than me.  We not only have the age difference, but also a cultural...
    deleted deleted 26-30 7 Responses Feb 26, 2011

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    I have just joined this forum

    and am looking to support and be supported by other survivors of domestic violence. My ex is currently in maximum security awaiting a trial that will hopefully send him to prison for life. Sometimes I feel so alone with my experiences, as I am sure we all do. I have learned and...
    KateElizabethF KateElizabethF 51-55, F 2 Responses Oct 28, 2014

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    It has been almost 3 years

    now since I ran away with my kids from my abusive husband. The first year being free was the worst. It gradually got better but the memories are always there. I still think about it and suffer from it. The best thing I did do was get away. It is not easy but worth it. Freedom is...
    30STMJL 30STMJL 36-40, F 1 Response Feb 22, 2014

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    A Childs Perspective.

    I saw my dad beat my mom once and that was enough to make me hate him. I was about 12 and I can remember it like it was yesterday. I kicked the door to their bedroom open and it hit him in the head as he tried to close it. He started shouting at my older brothers asking who...
    Scorpio1987 Scorpio1987 22-25, M 4 Responses Jun 5, 2012

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    My Abuse Story

    well i have struggled with my worth since i can remember never feeling good enough. i met a man, got married to him at a young age, at first he seemed amazing , gentle man and than he changed . the fighting , it started off with name calling , verbal abuse than mental than the...
    Aweir23 Aweir23 26-30, F 2 Responses Mar 8, 2013

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    It's been 3 years since I left him.

    I am currently in a new wonderful relationship, but my past haunts me every single day. I've never reached out for support, and I worry that because I am still in the "victim closet" that my relationship will eventually suffer. So here I am. My new boyfriend knows of my past and...
    Erika88o Erika88o 26-30 2 Responses Jan 6

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    Will You Be The Next Silent Witness

    A Silent Witness is a woman who has been killed due to domestic violence.  The Silent Witness organization presents life-sized red silhouettes of five women who died the previous year as a victim of domestic violence, and they are presented on the steps of our...
    silentwitness silentwitness 46-50 5 Responses Mar 4, 2010

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    http://www.byui.edu/counseling-center/self-help/abusive-relationships
    amtired amtired 22-25 Nov 25, 2014

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    On The Other Side..

    As much as I had to share my nightmare story, my gradual climb back up, then the acceptance and step forward, I now feel the need to share my victory, I am now in a place in my life where: I am happy with who I am, can't remember ever having thought let alone said that... I am...
    simplylee simplylee 46-50, F 2 Responses Oct 5, 2011

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    I can truly say that domestic violence is more

    than physical. I can say that a husband can rape a wife. And I can say that I am a survivor. I am just getting out of a ten year marriage where the verbal and emotional abuse started almost immediately. And the sexual abuse soon followed. But it came on so gradually that I was...
    elizzy8 elizzy8 31-35, F 4 Responses Dec 30, 2013

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    I am not a recent survivor.

    I left my husband a little over three years ago. In some ways I am coping much better than three years ago. In other ways I am not. The euphoria of being free and finally getting out has worn off. About a year after I left, I felt the entire world was open to me. Now I...
    strongerwiser34 strongerwiser34 31-35, F 2 Responses Dec 30, 2014

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    I was in an abusive relationship

    for two years. I stayed because I moved across the country to be with a boyfriend and the only people I knew were his friends. When I finally tried to tell others about the abuse, my boyfriend said I was lying and overreacting. I became the bad guy. He told others that I was...
    jlkelly01 jlkelly01 31-35, F 1 Response Sep 17, 2014

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    It's been 25 years ago I left the man

    who abused me. It took a while to become strong but I built a good life raised my son the best I could and had a successful business. My son was possibly abused by his father. He said so when he was small then changed his story and has denied it ever since. So when I took legal...
    Truthsetsmefree Truthsetsmefree 61-65 1 Response Jan 2

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    I am not a recent survivor.

    I left my husband a little over three years ago. In some ways I am coping much better than three years ago. In other ways I am not. The euphoria of being free and finally getting out has worn off. About a year after I left, I felt the entire world was open to me. Now I...
    strongerwiser34 strongerwiser34 31-35, F Dec 30, 2014

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    Lucky Escape

    When I met my husband he was so loving and gentle I never thought he could ever hurt me. After three years of marriage and the birth of our son he hit me for the first time, it was a slap across the face literally and shocked me to complete tears. I believed he was sorry and...
    Monkeynut1 Monkeynut1 22-25 Jun 19, 2013

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    From one relationship to the next.

    .. Almost everyone I've been with has been abusive, either mentally or physically... It's difficult to trust people. I guess that's why I'm on here. When it comes down to it, I'm looking at a screen, but I'm still interacting with people. It's easier this way to really connect.
    EmeraldDreams12 EmeraldDreams12 18-21 Dec 20, 2014

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    It's been 4 months today

    since I ran out of the house with my daughter in my arms, and I am proud to say I only looked back once (a few days after we left I went to see if he would get help and all he did was promise me as soon as he had her back in his possession I would get what was coming to me.) I...
    SunflowerChicka SunflowerChicka 26-30, F 1 Response Oct 29, 2014

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    What is it about DV that just sticks with us

    for so long? I think it affects every relationship that I experience...maybe this is not a bad thing. I am wiser and just more aware-I move on everyday. Oh, by the way, I read this great book on Domestic Violence the other day "Beneath Dreary" (got it on google books).... Anyway...
    AramatLynn AramatLynn 46-50, F 3 hrs ago

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    If you were to see me walking down the street,

    or in the grocery store, you would never realize that I am a survivor. The physical scars have healed, yet the mental and emotional scars remain. You see, I am a lucky woman. I am one of the fortunate ones, for I am survivor of 6 years of domestic violence. Those who have never...
    nuwbnprincess nuwbnprincess 31-35, F 1 Response Dec 16, 2014

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    I am not a recent survivor.

    I left my husband a little over three years ago. In some ways I am coping much better than three years ago. In other ways I am not. The euphoria of being free and finally getting out has worn off. About a year after I left, I felt the entire world was open to me. Now I...
    strongerwiser34 strongerwiser34 31-35, F 1 Response Dec 30, 2014

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    Want to share a bit of my story with Domestic

    violence: Well I had joined a dating website and met a guy in April 2011 and the first time we met we drank all night smoking marijuana and it proceeded to sex. He was going through a struggle with prescription pills and when we woke up he was pressuring me to go to the clinic...
    jlam123 jlam123 22-25, F 1 Response Sep 1, 2014

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    I am proud to say that I am a survivor of

    domestic violence, but what most people don't understand that your battle is still not over. It's been approximately three years since I left my ex who would abuse me mentally and physically. The scenario replays in my head all the time. It even has affected me in my recent...
    yessika23 yessika23 22-25, F 2 Responses Oct 9, 2014

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