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I Am a Twinless-twin

This is for those of us who had twins who died - at birth or anytime in life. 228 People

    I was born in December.

    I was supposed to have a twin brother but he didn't grow right and was born two months after me. He died and didn't even make it properly through birth. I had no idea I had a twin until a couple of weeks ago. I felt somewhat relieved when I found out. For my whole life I felt so...
    hm384823 hm384823 22-25, F Mar 30

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    My Experience Being A Twinless Twin.

         Losing a twin is like losing a limb.  A part of yourself is missing, you have to learn how to live without it, but even with the loss you still feel them with you.  I was born on April 15, 1980.  Just two minutes after my twin Jason. We...
    alwaysatwin alwaysatwin 26-30, F 20 Responses Apr 10, 2010

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    Hello... Again.

    So...um... I already shared my story, but I was kind of hoping for guidance. See, um, well recently I've been overcome by this feeling that my twin is still out there. Its like a nagging at the back of my mind. I try to move on in life but it just keeps pushing its way back in...
    RedFlowers349 RedFlowers349 16-17, F 2 Responses Jul 1, 2013

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    I just lost my identical twin February 9th.

    She was my past, present and future. I have lost part of my being. I can't accept it.
    tatee1 tatee1 56-60 1 Response Mar 28

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    I Am Twinless.

    I found out a few months ago that I was a part of a twin set. I've always had really weird dreams. He looks just like me and when he holds me i feel better then I ever have with some one else. It took years for me to finally ask my mother some questions. I heard that my brother...
    Ev1989 Ev1989 22-25, M 3 Responses Aug 13, 2013

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    The loss of my identical twin,

    Brian, is so hard to escape.
    jeffat jeffat 41-45, M 2 Responses Mar 25

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    Mirror Images

        Sixty-four years together and now I am alone.  How do you become a single entity after walking hand in hand since birth.  She has been gone two years now and it seems like yesterday.  Secretely, I know I will never truly be happy again.  Not truly, truly.  I am a...
    ripples2 ripples2 61-65 4 Responses May 26, 2012

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    My Twin Angel

    My twin and I were super close all our lives together.  As kids, we had some of our own toys but we never fought over the ones we shared.  We shared a room until she died at the age of 23.  We were in the same clubs, on the same team, home-schooled from 2nd grade...
    zoeticism zoeticism 36-40 4 Responses Aug 19, 2009

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    The entire pregnancy was normal.

    There weren't any complications until the birth.(Katie's placenta had ruptured) I lost my identical twin sister Katie 18 hours after our birth. I spent my entire childhood with Katie. My best friend was my dead twin that I haven't ever met. I hadn't made a real friend until my...
    daniellenotnobody daniellenotnobody 16-17, F 2 Responses Jan 14

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    My twin died when we were at 5 months gestation.

    I survived and was born only two weeks early. They think we had twin to twin transfusion syndrome because we were identical and shared a placenta. Her death probably saved my life. I have given her the name Emily.
    chaoticidealism chaoticidealism 26-30 4 Responses Feb 19

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    I am almost positive.

    I can just feel it. I cannot stress how much I do. It's like... I don't know how to explain it. My mum tells me that I have never had/nor have a twin, but I just... I don't know why but I feel it. Like, I literally could cry right now because of how strong the feeling is. It...
    SkinnyLove03 SkinnyLove03 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 31

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    My Identical Twin Died September 6th 2013

    12 days ago my twin passed away after bravely battling lung cancer for 2 years. I am numb, I am feeling empty, I am frustrated and impatient when hearing people who are not twins say to me, I know how you feel, or...I had this happen to me, ...I had someone very close pass away...
    Pamaclau Pamaclau 66-70, F 1 Response Sep 18, 2013

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    Im Lost Without My Twin

    as a child i always knew something was missing i had many problems because of the loss of my twin sister. constantly feelin missunderstood lost unloved searching for a connection i will never find. asking my mom what she did with my twin before ever being told i had one when i...
    crystalashley crystalashley 26-30, F 2 Responses Jul 15, 2012

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    I Am A Fraternal Twinless Twin

    i am 18 years old and i used to have a fraternal twin named kayla 'lyn. when we were born, everyone was so worried that i would die because i was the smaller one at 4lbs 7oz. i had machines hooked to me and had to be watched, but at 5 1/2 weeks old the unexpected happened..kayla...
    juustmee123 juustmee123 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 1, 2013

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    theirs a thing called vanishing twin syndrome

    it happens very early in the pregnancy and the baby is absorbed but the mother, child, or placenta... no one knows if i definelty had a twin... but I know somehow I had a twin it was a girl and we were identicle... I'm not making this up, they say you have a void that doesn't...
    Jessandjordyn0702 Jessandjordyn0702 13-15, F 1 Response Jan 8

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    My Twin, Daniel

    My twin brother died the day after we were born of Polycystic Kidney Disease. Actually, a year before that, my parents had another son who died the day he was born - of the same disease, only of a different form. I'm almost 21 years old and I wish he was here with me. I really...
    downtheroad downtheroad 22-25, F 2 Responses Sep 8, 2008

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    Sue And Char

    loss of a an identical twin at 37.
    jackelle1 jackelle1 41-45 1 Response Jul 3, 2013

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    The Rariety Of A Best Friend

    Me and my best friend are one in the same, one day we both were really sick in the morning but we still went to school, we both felt something was going to go really wrong and we had anxiety attacks all day, and then that very day I had my first near death experience. its crazy...
    SilentShallowBlogger SilentShallowBlogger 18-21, F 1 Response Nov 14, 2011

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    My Brother Finally Has A Name

    Almost 44 years ago I was adopted into a family that already had three sons. I was the much-desired daughter and any issues I might have had about being adopted were swept under the rug as a family with four kids doesn't have too much time for the drama of one particular child...
    sqt72 sqt72 41-45, F Aug 13, 2013

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    Twinless Twin Poetry

      I sit back, I relax, but there is always something there A feeling, an emotion, like something in the air A feeling that is always with me It’s been there all my life Through good times, bad times, happiness and strife It’s a feeling of confusion, of not...
    antonyi antonyi 26-30 2 Responses Aug 26, 2011

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    I Never Knew I Was A Twinless Twin

    I HAVE ALL MY LIFE FELT ALONE AND HAD WHAT THEY NOW CALL SEPORATION ANXIETY BACK IN THE SIXTIES I WAS LABLED PSYCHOTIC SND WAS ON ANTI PSYCHOTIC DRUGS WHILE I WAS IN EARLY ELEMENTART SCHOOL I WAS MISSERABLE FOREVER AND NEVER EVER RELAXED AND SAD I EVENTUALLY MARRIED A VERY LOVING...
    tammieanita tammieanita 51-55 Apr 14, 2013

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    I Miss Him

    My twin died with my mom his name was going to be Jacob and yes Jacob a boy we were ferternile and I miss him so much
    Dancelover279 Dancelover279 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 18, 2013

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    34 years old & confined to solitude

    My mother miscarried my twin about 5 months into her pregnancy. She was unaware she was having twins until about a month and a half later. I was still there. They never hid the twin from me, and we've all made our jokes that this world couldn't handle two of me. I never realized...
    Tcavness Tcavness 31-35, F Dec 6, 2013

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    My Twin Loss

    So glad that found this cite I lost my twin brother Michael on 7/12/2012 to suicide aged 35 I am screaming for help I am struggling the pain is to strong and thinking the same can someone please help me your all I have?
    Matthewjohntierney Matthewjohntierney 36-40, M 4 Responses Sep 30, 2012

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    My Twin Brother Was Murdered.

    My Twin brother was murdered in February. So far we know that it was just a random act of violence. We are so young, we just had our 23rd birthday in November. I cannot believe he is gone, and in such a violent way. It is such an inconsolable loss, a loss that only a twin can...
    naniandxe naniandxe 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 15, 2013

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    Losing My Best Friends

     Once I had a twin brother, now i don't. He was murdered about a month ago. I feel like it's my fault, not directly but  he went to get the dog who got out because of me and he never came back.  i feel like i set of the chain of events that eventually led to his death. but...
    camila12 camila12 22-25 1 Response May 24, 2012

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    Trying To Be One Instead Of Two :-(

    I lost my twinny in April 1997, a few weeks after our 49th birthday. I took Pippi, and being a twin, for granted and we always said we would be two old ladies together. She died in tragically silly and sad circumstances - suddenly. I'm 65 now, and I still think about her...
    tessibear tessibear 66-70, F 2 Responses Aug 11, 2013

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    How Did I Know?

    Male:20 yrs old . For as long as I can remember I'v always carried this lonely feeling, a feeling of something missing , Iv always found it hard to put into words and only told my mother and closest friends And whenever I do talk with them about it I can't do so without crying...
    mills92 mills92 18-21 Feb 18, 2013

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    To The Other Half Of Me

    i feel like im drowning in my grief, stranded in the middle of an ocean, with no relief, from this cold empty feeling, from the pain of losing you, bet you would never imagine getting a mention from The View, i dont know if this is part of Gods plan, but i'll try to carry on with...
    Barry26 Barry26 26-30, M 3 Responses May 29, 2012

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    I lost my sweet twin sister at the age of 24.

    . 2 months ago due suicide. It is still hard to believe and it feels not true. We were always together since our birth and had our own language and dressed with the same cloths when we were little. When we were older we were also the fun twins, the party twins and could laugh...
    Rosanja Rosanja 22-25, F Jan 2

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    My twin died at 5 months in my mom whom

    and what makes me mad that my mom didnt tell me tell i was 11 years old I all was think is she / he looking down on me well I ever see my twin one day I hope soo
    funnygirl32226 funnygirl32226 13-15, F Feb 22

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    I lost my twin brother Jonny to a Brain

    aneurysm 2 years ago this month. He was 36 and we did everything together since birth. I don't know how to go on other than looking out after my family and Jonnys wife. I also had a brain bleed 10yrs ago and recovered, we both had congenial defects i guess, but why am i still...
    martusmatt martusmatt 36-40, M 1 Response Jan 15

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    I Love And Miss My Twn

    I lost my twn brother 2 weeks ago I went to pick him up for work and I found him he was my best friend we spent every day together life will never be the same. I really don't know what to say I'm heartbroken I've always had my bro for34 years of my Life. and I know life will...
    josephtwn josephtwn 31-35, M Nov 6, 2013

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    Lost Twin To Suicide- Yes, Moms Ok

    My story title comes from the countless greetings,from friends and loved ones, who were concerned. Many times I regret staying around my mother, because apparently, its easier to identify losing a child, than losing a twin. Over and over again, I would have people ask me how my...
    Marz1118 Marz1118 31-35, F 4 Responses Sep 13, 2013

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    My Identical Twin Died On October 3rd 2013

    My Identical twin, John, died in a traffic accident on Oct. 3rd. The funeral is this friday. I just cannot believe that this happened. It seems impossible to me that I will never see or talk to him again. We were very close and were fortunate to always live close to one another...
    Bigwavedave1 Bigwavedave1 56-60, M 2 Responses Oct 8, 2013

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    4 Years And Counting. But I'll Never Stop Missing Him.

    Losing a loved one is one of the worst things that can ever happen to someone. Twins are special. They have this instant connection that unless you're a twin, you will never fully understand. Losing a twin I find to be even more painful than anything else. I've lost two aunts, a...
    lovelife18810 lovelife18810 13-15 Sep 11, 2013

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    I'm a twin less twin

    My mom didnt know she was pregnant with me until she was bleeding really bad. She went to the doctor and they said that she was pregnant with twins and one was dead(my brother) and that they were going to have to abort me. Well my mom didnt like that so she went to a different...
    Izzie44 Izzie44 13-15, F 1 Response Jul 17, 2013

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    I Feel Empty!

    Okay so I'm 20 and my mom told me when I was about 12 that I was a twin but she lost my brother about 6 months into the pregnancy. I have been trying so hard my whole life to find out why I feel so empty, lost, depressed, and alone like a part of me is missing. I never met him...
    joannelankford93 joannelankford93 18-21, F 1 Response Aug 20, 2013

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    I Am A Twinless Twin

    I lost my twin sister in January of 2012 in a car accident. I was also in the car accident and witnessed it all. I had to call 911 while my mom was hugging her body and screaming. I'm scarred and always get flashbacks. I can't get the sight of her laying there out of my head. It...
    Cooperluv23 Cooperluv23 13-15, F Aug 25, 2013

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    I Had A Twin...

    I always felt like I had a twin sister when I was a younger. I told my mother, father and my older sister (by two years) that I could always see when I thought of twins, two girls, side by side. They both looked like me. I loved playing games in my head. I would sit on the swing...
    ROBYNandROSE ROBYNandROSE 13-15, F 3 Responses Mar 9, 2013

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    Gone Way To Young

    My name is Nicole I just lost my twin may 10 2012 we just shared our 31st birthday april 12 my sister died due to a tragic motorcycle. Accident she left behind 2 amazing little boys well the thing is I feel as if half of my soul is gone I never been alone I always. Had her to...
    nicolemccrief nicolemccrief 31-35 7 Responses May 20, 2012

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    Almost One Year Ago I Lost You.

    July 15 2012 We lost you. We are having a pinic on Sunday the 14th in your memory. I feel so empty. Will write again soon.
    hardtobehere hardtobehere 41-45, F 1 Response Jul 9, 2013

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    A Lonely Girl

    I don't usually talk about Leo out loud because no one except my mom understands it. My mom was 7 months pregnant when Leo died, I lived. I only lived because he took the entire impact because of the way we were positioned. It was a car accident. My mom was stopped at a stop...
    LeandraMarie LeandraMarie 18-21, F Jun 26, 2013

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    My Natalie

    My twin sister Natalie passed away Feb. 1988. We were only 2 years old, but I remember that horrible day like it was just yesterday, I remember my mom and I running after my sister but we couldn't catch up to her, the car was reversing and ran over her, I remember screaming for...
    Lisso Lisso 26-30, F Oct 24, 2013

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    Two Sister's Together & Apart

    Hi. My twin and I were born at 27 weeks. We were very sick. We both had complications with breathing and brain bleeds. Hers was the worst. She passed because her lungs collapsed. We were born March 20 1993 & she passed March 22 1993. I never got to meet her obviously. I've come a...
    sisters2getherapart sisters2getherapart 18-21, F 2 Responses Nov 18, 2013

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    Anniversary

    Today is the anniversary of the passing of my twin. It is a difficult day emotionally. I don't have any words to share at the moment. Just wanted to give this moment space and time.
    spiritbs spiritbs 22-25, F Jan 8, 2010

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    I've Been Lost Without My Twin

    I too lost my twin to suicide. Richard decided to take his own life when we were 27.  Almost 20 years has passed since his death but not a day goes by when I don't think about him.   The blessings and experiences in having a twin were many.  Our birthday is coming up soon...
    thehip thehip 46-50 1 Response Jan 2, 2011

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    I just lost my identical twin sister.

    She was hit by a car as I stood frozen. A drunk driver to her life. She was all I had. It's a week today since that horrible day. I held her as she died in the middle of the road. I miss my sister so much. How do you move on when you've lost your other half? We turned 17 just a...
    alanabean alanabean 16-17, F 3 Responses Apr 7

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    Gone....

    She commit suicide when we were nine years old... I miss her every day...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses Sep 5, 2012

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    Related Experiences

    Today I woke up and went into automatic pilot. Everyday my entire life I would call or see my twin sister Vicky. I woke thinking I am calling Vicky only to be slammed with the gut...
    tatee1 tatee1 56-60 1 Response Mar 29

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