I Am a Victim of Domestic Violence

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 2,756 People

    Today I finally got out!

    I know this is just the beginning of a brand new start. my ex boyfriend abused me for almost 11 months. - controlling my where abouts. - how I dressed and even when I could bath . - couldn't have friends, go anywhere I just felt so isolated and we'd get in physical fights. he...
    jazzyphay2 jazzyphay2
    22-25, F
    4 Responses Nov 28, 2015

    I'm feeling very hopeless

    and overwhelmed. I've been married for almost 17 years to an emotionally abusive narcissistic alcoholic. It wasn't until about four years ago that I realized there was something wrong. That it wasn't all my fault and me not being enough. Everyone else loves him. He's very good...
    kmn789 kmn789
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Aug 22, 2014

    Ok so this experience follows on from some of

    the other stuff I've posted on here about growing up in a home with domestic violence. If there's anyone who's been in a similar situation then I hope, despite maybe different circumstances, that you take some comfort from my story and I sincerely hope that in your future you...
    Daydreamz Daydreamz
    18-21, F
    1 Response Oct 24, 2015

    There are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    carinaccaa carinaccaa
    26-30, F
    1 Response Mar 1

    Yelling and screaming,

    that's all that ever happened for 18 years, yelling and screaming until that Sunday afternoon after church on March 2nd. Our anniversary actually. He totally melted down. He hit me in the chest and it knocked me off balance and I fell backwards hitting my shoulder on the cat...
    Scottishgirl65 Scottishgirl65
    51-55, F
    Feb 2, 2015

    Well, I left my abuser,

    yet again, for about the hundredth time. I am struggling. He had choked me, kicked me, slapped me , threw me, restrained me, over the past few years. He also held his fists in my face, saying hes gonna bash my skull in . He also said he wants to lock me in a basement. He also...
    amnotthattired amnotthattired
    26-30, F
    3 Responses Dec 8, 2015

    Please could anyone who has been in a domestic

    abuse situation with children fill in my short anonymous survey :- http://www.smartsurvey.co.uk/s/ZID51/ it is for a research project and I would be very grateful :)
    hereat hereat
    36-40, F
    1 Response Mar 27

    I'm both saddened and greatful to know

    that I'm not alone. I left my abuser of 5 years, just a few months ago. I left with my child and nothing but the clothes on our backs, went into hiding for 3 weeks, got an order for protection and emergency custody. I still have nightmares some nights, and I still get anxious...
    lindseyy11 lindseyy11
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 25, 2015

    A Year Has Passed

    A Year has Passed Like Socrates said, “Wonder brings wisdom.” If you do not wonder about something how will you ever learn?My abuser did not want me to have knowledge, because knowledge is powerful, and that is what he took away from me, because he wanted power and control...
    awarren98 awarren98
    36-40, F
    14 Responses Jun 3, 2011

    I have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me everyday, he told me i was his world, i made his life wonderful. I had finished my final year at school and one day he got up from watching tv with me on the sofa at my...
    KirstyF KirstyF
    36-40, F
    7 Responses Dec 8, 2013

    Take The Night Back All They've Stolen All We Took From You

    I just wanted to stop by and drop a little song of support for y'all.  You all are inspirations to other s who need help.  I was suffering with some memories of a past situation and found this site and this group and through your words and wisdom you helped me past a dark part...
    Aether71 Aether71
    36-40, M
    6 Responses Jul 29, 2011

    I just want to make one comment on this subject.

    I was in an abusive relationship for 5 years and through four of those years I was abused almost on a daily basis. If it wasn't mental, it was physical. If it wasn't physical, it was mental. It's hard talking about it right now even after all these years because the mental and...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    2 Responses Mar 9, 2015

    Survivor

    That's what my social worker tells me when we visit and talk. Your not a victim your a survivor.    I see women who are TRUE survivors.  The ones who survive horrors.  I don't see myself as that.  I know women wear it like a proud badge of strength in some cases.  A...
    flodials flodials
    41-45, F
    8 Responses Jul 11, 2012
    mylifesucks25 mylifesucks25
    26-30, F
    1 Response Aug 21, 2015

    i am a victim of domestic violence i was with a

    man for a lil over five years we met just a few days after i turned 16 we had a long distance relationship for the first year n he spent six months of that year in jail i didnt know real well before he went but i felt a connection so i stayed with him n very faithful shortly...
    arianapage arianapage
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Nov 24, 2015

    Still Terrified....

    it is hard to talk about but I want help... When I was 14 years old I met this guy who I instantly fell for. He was 16 at the time. I was a virgin, he wasn't. He cheated on me because I wouldn't have sex with him. But about five months in I gave in. A week later he went to jail...
    babymama16 babymama16
    18-21, F
    9 Responses Nov 3, 2013

    I dont even know where to start

    while writing this i cant even begin to explain the pain thats been afflicted on me by a man that claims he loves me for FOUR WHOLE YEARS he decided what i wear if o meet with friends and where i would be spending my holidays the only time i began to feel any normality in my...
    DutchLove DutchLove
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Oct 21, 2015

    i was in a relationship

    for a year with a guy who beat me when i didn't do as he said would drag me across the floor by my hair because i was being a smart ***.. and would beat me some more if he found out i was trying to leave him... between the emotional and physical abuse i felt like i was losing it...
    Laneicea1 Laneicea1
    18-21, F
    1 Response Oct 10, 2015

    I was 14 when I met "THE DEVIL".

    . It was a short dating experience, but he was 19... A few years later I had my first child (yeah, 16 and pregnant).. When the devil found out I was pregnant he was hurt and sad, but we remained talking as friends. I had my daughter and he was on it, visiting and all.. We then...
    DrawSomethingBeautiful DrawSomethingBeautiful
    31-35, F
    3 Responses Feb 28

    $217 to Hit Your Wife With a Truck, Then Teach University Ethics In Idaho

    No one believes that Jim could be violent.  He's a white male philosophy professor.  No one could believe that I would be the kind of woman who would participate in the abuse.  I'm bright and outspoken.    There were several episodes of...
    Learning Learning
    46-50, F
    7 Responses Sep 14, 2007

    In Love With An Abuser, Trying to Lose the Love

    I thought it was love, an over the top tenderness, a magnetic sensuality that kept me waiting for the next time we were alone.... At first it wasn't abusive, just angry sometimes, what's a little insult with a bit of a slap or hair pulling???  But it got worse...
    dancingonthehill dancingonthehill
    51-55, F
    56 Responses Apr 3, 2009

    During the first few days

    after I left my abuser, I felt so free, so happy. It's been less then a month and I feel like I'm spinning out of control. It hurts all the time. I feel like I'm just doing any thing and everything just to stop the pain.
    PoohRules PoohRules
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Dec 3, 2015

    I'm finally out of a 3 year long physically

    and mentally abusive relationship. I loved her more than I ever loved anyone else, and when things were good I was happier than I can ever remember being. I think that's why I stayed around, continued to come back, and even begged her not to leave me. I am a 6'1" largely built...
    Alphato Alphato
    26-30, M
    2 Responses Mar 31

    I got to know this really sweet gentle boy of

    22 years old when he first came to Singapore. He was cheerful, joyous and full of life. Now that he is back in France, things changed. I went to visit him in December 2015 and I was beaten there by him. Beaten, manhandled and almost dragged out of the apartment a few times when...
    VicMarie VicMarie
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Jan 23

    What Now???

    So I was with this man for over 5 years....  I married him August 16, 2007.  I left for my honeymoon literally the day after my wedding to Hawaii.  Well, two weeks after we got back the name calling started.. Your fat... you don't do it for me anymore...
    pitbu11lover pitbu11lover
    26-30, F
    14 Responses Mar 12, 2009

    I just got out of the abusive relationship I

    was in for 3 and a half years! I fell in love with this guy, but little did I know, he was mentally and physically abusive. He called me every horrible name you can think of. He would pull me by my hair, chock me, grab me and throw me on the floor, punch me, and so much more...
    deleted deleted
    26-30
    3 Responses Nov 11, 2015

    Am I The Only Male

    I read quite a few of your stories and I find it interesting, but not surprising that I have not read one story by a male.  This sort of goes with my experience as a victim of domestic violence.  I was married very young to my high school sweetheart.  Everything...
    Aether71 Aether71
    36-40, M
    43 Responses Jun 3, 2010

    My brother just beat my mom

    and me up right now. He has major anger issues and as soon as he gets angry you can't say anything to him otherwise he'll start beating you up. I hate him. If you don't do what he wants then he gets angry again. My mom said she won't do something so he started harassing her and...
    Carneira Carneira
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Sep 15, 2015

    I have just started trying to get help

    for the situation with my abusive husband. Because we have kids, it is complicated for me. I am afraid that if I leave, which is what I want to do, that he will retaliate against me by hurting the children. Maybe he won't, but I just don't know and these things happen. I...
    ch1970 ch1970
    46-50, F
    6 Responses Jan 23
    Multiple15 Multiple15
    36-40, M
    1 Response Sep 2, 2015

    There are numerous older men in the world

    who are single and seeking someone special in their life. For all such men, AgeMeet.com has been created as a reliable online platform to find women for dating and companionship. The spokesperson reports that many older men have started finding perfect companions through their...
    bettyccaa bettyccaa
    26-30, F
    Sep 6, 2015

    Finally stayed at a new lovely home.

    I watched sunset from my big windows last night. It was an amazing view. I am lucky! Still my ex bothers me. Text like thousand times a day. He even show up at my work. He realized that he lost me but refused to accept that. He use my money to buy many movies. S h I t. I had...
    girlyloveorange girlyloveorange
    31-35, F
    2 Responses Nov 19, 2014

    She is so angry. She says I keep triggering her.

    I am not trying to. I just want to feel safe and appreciated. But she gets wound up and loses her control. She screams and swears and keeps hitting me. Now she’s pregnant. Last night she lost her temper in the car and pounding her own stomach. I told her want to break up...
    KenWaltz KenWaltz
    31-35, M
    2 Responses Mar 18

    I was with my x for 12 years

    and I wasn't even a human in those days you could feel the air blowing through me I was hollow and I have been away from him for the past two years I love it and my only regret is not leaving sooner I often wonder if I'll ever be able to love again but I'm still learning how to...
    Pammiii Pammiii
    51-55
    4 Responses Mar 28, 2015

    I Did It.

    I called the police. He's in a cell right now. Court in 4 hours. I'll never let this happen again.
    AlexSparky AlexSparky
    18-21, F
    7 Responses Sep 13, 2013

    It's been a little over a week

    since I got out. I was able to tell him I was done and ready to move on w my life w out him. 2 nights ago he showed up at my job w the girl he cheated on me with and had been cheating on me with for two years. Last night I was home w our daughter and he was drinking came in and...
    lis924 lis924
    22-25, F
    1 Response Dec 1, 2015

    My Dad hit my Mom. I never thought things would

    come to that. I'm lost in all my feelings and I don't feel as though I have a home. Just a broken family..
    AE762 AE762
    18-21, F
    1 Response Sep 5, 2015

    I was married to a drug addict

    who beat me and cheated on me and robbed me and stole my car so i couldn't go to work. It was awful. It was a long time ago, but I still have problems with things. Like, when you are married to someone whojust shows up in the middle of the night and beats you up while you are...
    mom4ce mom4ce
    51-55, F
    3 Responses Sep 6, 2015

    I was with my bf for 7.

    5 years sense we were 14, we decided to move in together about 2 years ago today. When we lived together he became controlling at first over small things, he would constantly tell me things like "he's the only one there for me" and he would constantly remind me of how crappy my...
    SummerK267 SummerK267
    22-25, F
    1 Response Jul 16, 2015

    Hello my wife yells over the smallest things.

    It is really stressing me out. I had 2 heart attacks last year and the stress is not good for me. She also grabs me in the genitals and she knows i don't like it. Im afraid to press charges because her son from a former marriage lives with us and he's hot headed too, And is...
    AbusedHusband AbusedHusband
    51-55, M
    1 Response Nov 27, 2015

    Stop the Hate!

    This is a blog i wrote on March 3 on my myspace. I was so tired of hearing beaten women bashed!! I am a huge DV activist in my hometown and hope that by informing the masses beaten women can avoid further humiliation. STOP CALLING WOMEN WHO  ARE BEING BEATEN AND ABUSED...
    amyjo3 amyjo3
    26-30, F
    13 Responses Mar 23, 2009

    My mom. Every girl wants a woman they can look

    up to and depend on. Share secrets and do makeovers. Talk about boy problems. My mom, she's nothing like that. She was in a car accident 22 years ago. Since then she's been on every drug in the book and is very addicted to them. For the last three years it's gotten really...
    thefallenones thefallenones
    16-17, F
    5 Responses Sep 9, 2014

    I recently left my ex,

    again. This is the last. In past few years, he choked me..slapped me.... Threw me... Kicked me... And other things too. The Last Time I saw him he said he's gonna bash my brains in. He threw me across his living room . I went flying. He kept calling me a dog. He held his fists...
    amnotthattired amnotthattired
    26-30, F
    7 Responses Jul 16, 2015

    Wow. Every day is worse He is being

    so mean I don't wanna live.
    gidget9204 gidget9204
    31-35, F
    11 Responses Apr 9, 2015

    Well, Not Anymore

    My ex husband was abusive, physically, mentally and emotionally. I spent 5 years getting my *** beat, being put down, being forced to do things i didnt want to. Being raped on a regular basis. Yes ladies, your husband CAN rape you. It was pure hell. I ran when I had the right...
    kittylove30 kittylove30
    31-35, F
    6 Responses Jul 12, 2013

    Still Alive

    It has been 3 years now since I left my abusive husband of 16 years and my life is completely different. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life to just take our child and run, but I did it. I can honestly say that my daughter and I are both happy, healthy and...
    KaseyBee KaseyBee
    41-45, F
    4 Responses Nov 5, 2013

    Please could anyone who has been in a domestic

    abuse situation with children fill in my short anonymous survey :- http://www.smartsurvey.co.uk/s/ZID51/ it is for a research project and I would be very grateful :)
    hereat hereat
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Mar 1

    I Am No Longer a Victim

     "I'm sorry, you just make me so mad". How many times I've heard that, I thought as I rubbed my swollen cheek.   It started out perfect, I met a man that was handsome, smart, and could make anyone laugh. He was the life of the party. Everyone thought he was...
    vanilla vanilla
    26-30, F
    15 Responses Jul 8, 2007

    I just filed a protection order.

    I'm finally going to be free of him. I'm empowered, yet terrified.
    findinghome90 findinghome90
    26-30, F
    5 Responses Oct 21, 2014

    My story is similar to those on here

    but it's not as bad. He hasn't assaulted me yet. And that's why I got out. When we met it was amazing, we both have the same sick sense of humor an would laugh for hours. Being in different states made us spend hours talking over the phone, but which also meant I didn't get to...
    jesselizabethjw jesselizabethjw
    26-30, F
    2 Responses Feb 28, 2014

    I Didn't See It Coming . . .

    When I met my husband, he couldn't do enough for me.  He was wonderful.  But as soon as the vows were taken he changed, slowly and subtly at first, then it sped up and became more obvious.  He isolated me from my friends and my family.  He constantly...
    LCLM LCLM
    41-45, F
    9 Responses Feb 19, 2008

    My boyfriend, I guess ex now,

    is verbally and emotionally abusive. Last week he not only verbally attacked me, but he called our daughter horrible names. He's called me a bit*h, c*nt ... And I've stayed. But after he called my daughters those names too... I said enough is enough. I left with our children...
    MariaBella2015 MariaBella2015
    36-40, F
    3 Responses Nov 9, 2015

    :(

    I have for many years now been putting up with domestic voilence.. It has ground me down so much i do want to die some times:( i dont know why I have stuck it for so long I think its coz I feel i could never live on my own. I feel very trapped by my husband and his hold he has...
    mamdo2 mamdo2
    36-40, F
    40 Responses Nov 8, 2012

    One of the first things I was kind of surprised

    to find after becoming an unwilling "victim" of domestic violence is that everyone's story is very different. Although it was varying degrees of the same crime and there were familiar bits and peices, to this day, I still haven't found a story I could personally relate to, that...
    lovememorenow lovememorenow
    46-50, F
    5 Responses Sep 21, 2015

    I see a ton of people have shared their stories,

    some similar some different, but all terrible, because having to go through this is an extremely horrible experience. Even after it's over your're left with mental and physical scars and marks. I want to tell my story, but I know reading another one will only upset people more...
    MauraAl MauraAl
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Oct 16, 2015

    It Came Out In Clumps

    The next day I washed my hair. It came out in clumps, some with skin still attached. I saved one and gave it to him. He looked at it squeamishly, like I had handed him a dead rat. He dropped it on the floor in disgust. “What?” I asked, “You tore it out, I thought you...
    lulabelle138 lulabelle138
    36-40, F
    2 Responses Sep 29, 2013

    Im having a hard time dealing with this maybe

    because its the first time ive ever had to. My fiance punched me three times today. im froze in shock i cant believe it. idk what to do or what it means. is this really only gonna get worse .... im heartbroken
    wishingforbetterdaysx wishingforbetterdaysx
    22-25, F
    6 Responses Oct 26, 2015

    Lingering Effects

    I have written many stories. I have shared my pain and hopefully some of you have found some comfort or identify with the issues I have and am facing.  It has been several years since I physically left my abuser.  I tried to be civil and just go with the flow for a couple...
    flodials flodials
    41-45, F
    6 Responses Nov 28, 2012

    one night he got drunk

    and I saw someone that I didn't know. my caring boyfriend was replaced by a monster. we tried talking at first. I tried to talk him out of drinking anymore since 18 beers in less than 8 hours was quite a bit. he got even more agitated. still trying to cool down the situation...
    browneyes1313 browneyes1313
    22-25, F
    2 Responses Mar 31
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