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I Am a Victim of Domestic Violence

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 2,663 People

    I went to DVIS in my town today ; they called

    3-4 shelters for me and they're ALL full. Lost yet another job have a black eye bruises Idk what to do.
    gidget9204 gidget9204 31-35, F 1 Response May 26

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    Yelling and screaming,

    that's all that ever happened for 18 years, yelling and screaming until that Sunday afternoon after church on March 2nd. Our anniversary actually. He totally melted down. He hit me in the chest and it knocked me off balance and I fell backwards hitting my shoulder on the cat...
    Scottishgirl65 Scottishgirl65 46-50, F 3 Responses Feb 2

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    my abuser is in jail.

    I cry everyday that I put him there. my ex H who remained a good friend has stepped in for support but doesn't understand my tears. I am full of guilt . my ex is a great person, father wants me back. why can't I get the man that beat me, who's scars and pain I see and feel...
    twofourgone twofourgone 46-50, F 4 Responses Apr 5

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    Take The Night Back All They've Stolen All We Took From You

    I just wanted to stop by and drop a little song of support for y'all.  You all are inspirations to other s who need help.  I was suffering with some memories of a past situation and found this site and this group and through your words and wisdom you helped me past a dark part...
    Aether71 Aether71 36-40, M 6 Responses Jul 29, 2011

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    Survivor

    That's what my social worker tells me when we visit and talk. Your not a victim your a survivor.    I see women who are TRUE survivors.  The ones who survive horrors.  I don't see myself as that.  I know women wear it like a proud badge of strength in some cases.  A...
    flodials flodials 41-45, F 8 Responses Jul 11, 2012

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    It Came Out In Clumps

    The next day I washed my hair. It came out in clumps, some with skin still attached. I saved one and gave it to him. He looked at it squeamishly, like I had handed him a dead rat. He dropped it on the floor in disgust. “What?” I asked, “You tore it out, I thought you...
    lulabelle138 lulabelle138 31-35, F 2 Responses Sep 29, 2013

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    In Love With An Abuser, Trying to Lose the Love

    I thought it was love, an over the top tenderness, a magnetic sensuality that kept me waiting for the next time we were alone.... At first it wasn't abusive, just angry sometimes, what's a little insult with a bit of a slap or hair pulling???  But it got worse...
    dancingonthehill dancingonthehill 51-55, F 57 Responses Apr 3, 2009

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    Still Alive

    It has been 3 years now since I left my abusive husband of 16 years and my life is completely different. It was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life to just take our child and run, but I did it. I can honestly say that my daughter and I are both happy, healthy and...
    KCecil73 KCecil73 41-45, F 4 Responses Nov 5, 2013

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    I am unpopular. I am misunderstood.

    I am held down. I am hurt. I cry. I feel like it's my fault. I am confused. I am none of these things in the outside world, I am all of these things in my home. I am excellent at making things look like the shiny life that it is not. I am a sister, a lover, a friend, a...
    PKFM30 PKFM30 26-30, F Jun 8

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    I was severely beaten last night.

    .. Because I said I have a fu**ing migraine and can he stop banging on the fuc**ing pan... Sent him into a full blown rage.. I am beat from top to bottom. He choked me so hard and so many times I think there is damage... It hurts to swallow.. I have his hand prints around my...
    Deadinside74 Deadinside74 36-40, F 1 Response Jun 9

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    I'm feeling very hopeless

    and overwhelmed. I've been married for almost 17 years to an emotionally abusive narcissistic alcoholic. It wasn't until about four years ago that I realized there was something wrong. That it wasn't all my fault and me not being enough. Everyone else loves him. He's very good...
    kmn789 kmn789 36-40, F 3 Responses Aug 22, 2014

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    Was wondering whether you ever truly get over

    it? It is difficult when you have feelings of guilt, despair and sadness. Anyone heard of narcissists pretty much sums my ex up to a T. How do you think about yourself and put you first?? I find it very difficult as he blamed me for everything and also wanted to try and change...
    Brightheart89 Brightheart89 22-25, F 6 Responses Mar 26

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    Finally stayed at a new lovely home.

    I watched sunset from my big windows last night. It was an amazing view. I am lucky! Still my ex bothers me. Text like thousand times a day. He even show up at my work. He realized that he lost me but refused to accept that. He use my money to buy many movies. S h I t. I had...
    girlyloveorange girlyloveorange 31-35, F 4 Responses Nov 19, 2014

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    They are forcing my abuser to come to my

    daughter's birthday party tomorrow. They say that I'm not thinking about her, because I didn't invite him. He's a dead beat dad and does nothing for her. And now my family is forcing me to do something that does not feel right. He's always breaking promises. And my daughter's at...
    CreoleItalianwoman CreoleItalianwoman 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 7

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    My friends made me feel safe.

    I called my only two friends after my husband had thrown the supper I'd cooked him in the bed with me while I slept. I called the wife(my bff's are married to each other) and she calmed me down and got me to stop crying. It was very late and she was very patient and sweet. She...
    Catsoutdabag Catsoutdabag 31-35, F 1 Response Feb 27, 2014

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    Even though I left him,

    he still has control over me. We are still friends on facebook. Why? Because of safety reasons. And I'm afraid to make any moves, by removing him, due to his threats in the past. It has been 4 years and I'm still scared of him. You would think that I should be over it by now. I...
    CreoleItalianwoman CreoleItalianwoman 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 6

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    A Year Has Passed

    A Year has Passed Like Socrates said, “Wonder brings wisdom.” If you do not wonder about something how will you ever learn?My abuser did not want me to have knowledge, because knowledge is powerful, and that is what he took away from me, because he wanted power and control...
    awarren98 awarren98 36-40, F 15 Responses Jun 3, 2011

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    it's been two months plus.

    he is still in jail and we are headed to another hearing. I'm getting weaker. I don't want to do this. I want it to go away. I want my life back. I miss him so much. I want to hear his voice. I'm so sorry this happened. everydY is a fake. every night I still cry. he has to hate...
    twofourgone twofourgone 46-50, F 2 Responses May 9

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    So tonight the scar on shoulder was noticed by

    someone who's important to me. I was asked how I got it and not wanting to lie i said DV. I spent 5yrs with him and 4yrs were excruciating. There was so many kinds of abuse in that relationship I can't even find the beginning. I one time lost 30lbs in less than 6mos of being...
    goodwitch011070 goodwitch011070 41-45, F 2 Responses Mar 17

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    Hello all. I am new to this site

    but would like to share my story. I have been in a emotional, verbal, and physical abusive relationship for 8 years. Just a few months ago, I escaped and tried to move on with my life by dating my co-worker who eventually turned out to be extremely emotional and verbal abusive...
    deleted deleted 26-30 2 Responses May 20

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    I have been with my abusive husband

    for 21years from the age of 16 (he was then 18). For a long time he was so charming and he wanted to see me everyday, he told me i was his world, i made his life wonderful. I had finished my final year at school and one day he got up from watching tv with me on the sofa at my...
    KirstyF KirstyF 36-40, F 8 Responses Dec 8, 2013

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    Stop the Hate!

    This is a blog i wrote on March 3 on my myspace. I was so tired of hearing beaten women bashed!! I am a huge DV activist in my hometown and hope that by informing the masses beaten women can avoid further humiliation. STOP CALLING WOMEN WHO  ARE BEING BEATEN AND ABUSED...
    amyjo3 amyjo3 26-30, F 12 Responses Mar 23, 2009

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    Hi, Few months after moved out.

    I love my place to be alone and peace. It is a beautiful thing. Until...... It is about to start to analyze myself and daily routines to work and my daily home. I got stressed panic!. I got few other issues going on. I realized.... omg he effected me so much. I am so badly...
    girlyloveorange girlyloveorange 31-35, F 4 Responses Mar 21

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    Do you like scrambled eggs?

    This morning I made him scrambled eggs. I've cooked them several times throughout my life never had any complaints; oh this time it was different. He reacted by complaining basically told me they tasted like sh#?! Then he proceeds to get up after more complaining. I say calmly...
    gidget9204 gidget9204 31-35, F 6 Responses Apr 12

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    Well, Not Anymore

    My ex husband was abusive, physically, mentally and emotionally. I spent 5 years getting my *** beat, being put down, being forced to do things i didnt want to. Being raped on a regular basis. Yes ladies, your husband CAN rape you. It was pure hell. I ran when I had the right...
    kittylove30 kittylove30 31-35, F 9 Responses Jul 12, 2013

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    $217 to Hit Your Wife With a Truck, Then Teach University Ethics In Idaho

    No one believes that Jim could be violent.  He's a white male philosophy professor.  No one could believe that I would be the kind of woman who would participate in the abuse.  I'm bright and outspoken.    There were several episodes of...
    Learning Learning 46-50, F 7 Responses Sep 14, 2007

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    I can't seem to let go of the person I love

    with all my heart, even though inside he wishes he could smash my face So much he hates everything about me yet he won't leave.
    brokenh8rt brokenh8rt 26-30, F 2 Responses Jul 2, 2014

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    My arm is bruised where his finger marks lie.

    My neck is sore where he grabbed me...over and over again. My legs has marks from where he gripped at my thigh. My head has abnormal bumps and swelling from the punch and the slamming against the car wall. My shirt was torn off leaving me humiliated. My brain was hurting...
    Rakagibo Rakagibo 36-40, F 1 Response Mar 19

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    I Didn't See It Coming . . .

    When I met my husband, he couldn't do enough for me.  He was wonderful.  But as soon as the vows were taken he changed, slowly and subtly at first, then it sped up and became more obvious.  He isolated me from my friends and my family.  He constantly...
    LCLM LCLM 41-45, F 10 Responses Feb 19, 2008

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    I Did It.

    I called the police. He's in a cell right now. Court in 4 hours. I'll never let this happen again.
    AlexSparky AlexSparky 18-21, F 9 Responses Sep 13, 2013

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    why do I feel guilty

    that my abuser is in jail facing prison charges? I miss him and what I thought we had. should I refuse to testify? he's done this to others but the dropped charges. part of me hates him for hurting me ..
    justinsneedow justinsneedow 46-50, F 1 Response Mar 22

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    When you've been a victim of domestic violence

    your whole world turns upside down. There is nothing more condradictory than the man who professes to love you harming you physically and emtionally. As all your thoughts are picked apart you begin to question everything....even you're reality... It's part denial.. It's hard to...
    Catsoutdabag Catsoutdabag 31-35, F 19 Responses May 3, 2014

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    Enduring A Monster...

    I was unprepared for the nightmare I got myself into when I was 18-years-old. Back then...they really didn't talk about abuse within romantic relationships like they do now. I was naive...very wet behind the ears...and not expecting a guy who said he loved me to treat me in such...
    KassieKat KassieKat 46-50, F 19 Responses Apr 25, 2011

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    My story is similar to those on here

    but it's not as bad. He hasn't assaulted me yet. And that's why I got out. When we met it was amazing, we both have the same sick sense of humor an would laugh for hours. Being in different states made us spend hours talking over the phone, but which also meant I didn't get to...
    jesselizabethjw jesselizabethjw 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 28, 2014

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    I was with my x for 12 years

    and I wasn't even a human in those days you could feel the air blowing through me I was hollow and I have been away from him for the past two years I love it and my only regret is not leaving sooner I often wonder if I'll ever be able to love again but I'm still learning how to...
    Pammiii Pammiii 51-55 4 Responses Mar 28

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    Am I The Only Male

    I read quite a few of your stories and I find it interesting, but not surprising that I have not read one story by a male.  This sort of goes with my experience as a victim of domestic violence.  I was married very young to my high school sweetheart.  Everything...
    Aether71 Aether71 36-40, M 48 Responses Jun 3, 2010

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    Lingering Effects

    I have written many stories. I have shared my pain and hopefully some of you have found some comfort or identify with the issues I have and am facing.  It has been several years since I physically left my abuser.  I tried to be civil and just go with the flow for a couple...
    flodials flodials 41-45, F 7 Responses Nov 28, 2012

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    Life can sometimes be very tough

    and I belive that making mistakes gives you a chance to learn from them. I had my son when I was young and even though he is the best thing that ever happened to me his dad was the worst! he abused me and controlled me. I was lucky enough to see what he was doing and I left him...
    CB2788 CB2788 26-30, F 2 Responses Jun 9

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    My bf beats me and broje my arm.

    I need surgery again and he doesn't care.
    deleted deleted 26-30 3 Responses Jun 18

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    why do I feel guilty

    that my abuser is in jail facing prison charges? I miss him and what I thought we had. should I refuse to testify? he's done this to others but the dropped charges. part of me hates him for hurting me ..
    justinsneedow justinsneedow 46-50, F 3 Responses Mar 22

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    what if I am living the life I have always

    wanted... i was crazy in love with someone for one year, got engaged for another and now we're married for 3 years...he is the live of my life...so kind, supportive and considerate...everyday we get closer...he get me flowers and takes care of me very well...treating me like a...
    Sj1287 Sj1287 22-25, F 1 Response May 17

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    I am going through a very messy break up at the

    moment and I need help and guidance. I have started a blog with all my experiences: diariesofdomesticviolence.blogspot.com.au/ I have been abused both sexually and physically by my Indian partner for nearly 5 years and even by his mum and his sister. He is also a policeman...
    melek1 melek1 22-25, F Jun 21

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    when I met my Bf I had just separated from my

    husband and here comes this extremely good looking blue eyed tall hansom guy that two of my really good friend's introduce me to. He had ho's **** together and I'm not saying my husband didn't, but my husband just liked to party on the weekends way to much looking back on it...
    sissieblue sissieblue 31-35, F Mar 6

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    So me and my fiancé had an argument earlier,

    this came up because one of his friends had beat up his girlfriend and she ended up posting the pictures on Facebook. Then he tells me look at her face now that's actually abuse, what I do to you is nothing compared to that she has bruises and she's bleeding. So basically he...
    jazzysymone6 jazzysymone6 18-21, F 2 days ago

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    I just want to make one comment on this subject.

    I was in an abusive relationship for 5 years and through four of those years I was abused almost on a daily basis. If it wasn't mental, it was physical. If it wasn't physical, it was mental. It's hard talking about it right now even after all these years because the mental and...
    goodwitch011070 goodwitch011070 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 9

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    I found out my husband is a cheater

    and so he beat me yesterday
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Jun 13

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