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I Am a Woman In a Sexless Marriage

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 3,863 People

    Just Tired

    I think that I am over this sexless marriage... I have been married for 5 years now... I have tried everything to get him to want me sexually.. I don't want to waste another 5 years living this way.... I feel so rejected and my pride is hurt... I take care of myself and I get hit...
    Cy0521 Cy0521 36-40, F 7 Responses Oct 17, 2013

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    Once again another night of yelling

    and tears and falling asleep alone only to feel my precious 6 month old little boy kicking inside me. I'm so frustrated and lonely yet my husband is just inches away from me. 😞😞😞
    kmbbb22 kmbbb22 22-25, F 9 Responses Feb 27

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    Really Confused.....Can Anyone Help Me Through This?

    I have been married for 3 1/2 years. Our 1st year of marriage I tried to be a wonderful wife and had sex with my husband about every other day. After visiting a friend in his home town, he had told me all of his friends were talking about how much they wished their wives wanted...
    Hopingforananswer Hopingforananswer 46-50, F 21 Responses Dec 2, 2013

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    I Lie And Blame It On Meds

    He thinks we don't have sex because of the side effects of a medication. Initially, it did take sex drive away, but I haven't taken those pills in month. I just don't want to have sex with him anymore. That's bad I know, but why should I force myself to do something I do not want...
    Sunshine0615 Sunshine0615 36-40, F 6 Responses Nov 9, 2013

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    So, my fiancé and I got married.

    That was seven years ago. That is the day my whole world changed. It is almost like after marrying, my husband thought....... I got her now. I can be myself and let my true self out, along with all my secrets and there is nothing she can do about it but accept it. It's like he...
    Confucius125 Confucius125 36-40, F 21 Responses Dec 26, 2013

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    I absolutely hate my husbands cell phone!

    He comes home and is constantly glued to the thing. He says he's not talking to anyone but every few minutes he's tapping away on the stupid thing and keeps it so close to him that if he looses sight if it he freaks out. Sorry had to vent I admit I have my phone but I put...
    Rena4 Rena4 31-35, F 5 Responses Mar 27

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    What's Wrong With Him?

    I posted awhile back about my husband of nearly 20 years. We have been nearly sexless, like 3-4 times a year for several years now. I guess officially sexless is less than 10 times a year, so I am for sure. Then if you count the total minutes, very little foreplay, get on...
    itsAmysturn itsAmysturn 41-45, F 11 Responses Jun 25, 2011

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    Life Should Be Shared With Someone....

    What do you do when you have given everything....All that you are ....To someone...And then that person just decides to reject you. This hurts so incredibly bad and the years are just passing by....Not one touch nor caring word....I want that connection with another human being...
    goodgirlnky goodgirlnky 46-50, F 10 Responses Oct 17, 2013

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    I am 32 and have 2 kids.

    .life is good and normal...but I have this one problem that I cannot fathom... Have any of u felt this way..my hubby n I had loads of issues first few years of marriage that we got past..but everytime he touches me I am.not aroused at all..usually he will never make a move..in...
    NatKey NatKey 31-35, F 2 Responses 1 hr ago

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    What Can I Do

    What is a girl to do to entice her husband into having sex? He thinks lingerie is stupid. He hates **** and he refuses to use pharmacuticals. He won't even talk to a doctor about his problems.
    pbell71 pbell71 41-45, F 19 Responses Oct 30, 2013

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    Guilt

    This always happens. We had a confrontation today. Well if you could call it that. It started with me calling him out on some really PA behavior. Then one thing led to another. I told him how I felt about some things including his total inability to be intimate with me...
    annhath annhath 46-50, F 9 Responses Nov 20, 2013

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    Not For Long!

    I am actually on my way out.  My move out date is December 26th, yippee!  The sexlessness was just a symptom of our greater problems, but it was the one symptom that made me wake up and smell the coffee.  We have two beautiful boys that I want not to grow up...
    texaschickie texaschickie 31-35, F 25 Responses Dec 10, 2007

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    I wrote recently about the problems my husband

    was having in coming to terms with my rather creamy bowel movements. Thanks to everyone who responded and offered their help and guidance. Your comments have been taken to heart and we are finally working out our issues. The reason for writing now is that a new problem has...
    JennyFilth JennyFilth 22-25, F 1 Response Apr 8

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    Going on 18 years. One child,

    he's ten. I had one foot out the door at ten years and we did some therapy... Never really finished or pursued further on his end. Now I've been a stay at home Mom for ten years and will struggle to get back into the workforce if I leave...I have no money stashed (yet?) and we...
    FannieBee FannieBee 36-40, F 8 Responses Jan 8

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    We have never sex ...

    once every 1-2 months. I am always the one asking for it never him. He is depressed but never wants to do anything about it. Just want to sleep or do anything else then be with me and the kids. I think about 1-3 times a week that I want to leave him... We have been married for 8...
    epli epli 31-35, F 3 Responses Mar 4

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    Not Even 30 Years Old And Already Living In Sexless Marriage

    I have been with my husband for 5 years , married for 3. Last time we had sex it was over 6 months ago. On average is usually every 3 or 4 months. I am testing how long we can last. I am the one who always inniciate sex, he always " gives in " in the end , end we have whole 4...
    iamwetforyou iamwetforyou 26-30, F 14 Responses Jul 20, 2013

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    We Had The "talk", And What A Shock!

    So I finally worked up the courage to sit hubby down and have yet another “talk”, with him. The kids were both at sleepovers, and I thought this was the perfect time.  I just started out by saying I love him dearly, but these last few years I have felt more and more lonely...
    itsAmysturn itsAmysturn 41-45, F 52 Responses May 19, 2011

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    My Sexless Marriage To A Japanese Man

    I have been married for about 15 years. I love my husband but recently as a friend not as a lover. (I gave up 4 years ago trying to have a sexual relationship with him which is when I started to work on myself--getting in shape and facing my issues about men.) My husband and I...
    kim1958 kim1958 51-55, F 22 Responses Dec 22, 2010

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    I Need To Get Out

    I know my marriage is over. I'm just so afraid of actually doing something about it. We haven't had sex in 4 years. I'm so over being alone in this relationship. I'm just terrified to take the first step. I know he cheats, so that should make it easier right? It's not that easy...
    SouthernGirl1968 SouthernGirl1968 41-45, F 21 Responses Jul 16, 2013

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    My husband and I have been married

    for two years. Before we got married we talked about how important sex was to me, and he agreed. We had a great sex life up until we got married. As it stands now, the last time we had sex was three days after our wedding. I have tried everything, crying, begging, anger...
    janesdoe111 janesdoe111 41-45, F 12 Responses Dec 7, 2013

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    I am grateful for reading other stories

    and that I am not alone! My husband and I have been married for 9 years. The sex is always great, but has NEVER been frequent. There was always an excuse as to why not. Now all of the excuses have been disproven and the truth is he has no idea why he has no sex drive. We have...
    frustratedbb frustratedbb 26-30, F 7 Responses Jan 6

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    What happens when 20 people meet

    for the first time and kiss? Watch this link to find out. It is really beautiful. Let me know what you think after you watch it. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/11/tatia-pileva-first-kiss-strangers_n_4940669.html?icid=maing-grid7|maing7|dl13|sec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D452850
    OutOfPatience OutOfPatience 61-65, M 1 Response Mar 12

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    I Pretend

    I fake to get along with my husband ..... I used to try to talk to him about why there is no sex in our marriage ... I used to complain constantly. about why he wont do anything with me,or go anywhere with me ... For 2 years I tried, but he is happy to sit in his chair all day...
    Asianblue Asianblue 41-45, F 29 Responses Jun 10, 2012

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    I Am Really Struggling In a Sexless Marriage

    I am grateful for the courage that it must have taken for you all to start this site and share your stories. I knew I couldn't be the only one but at times it sure feels like it. I m really struggling in a sexless marriage. My husband is a great guy wonderful father and the...
    sexlessinmechanicsville sexlessinmechanicsville 26-30, F 21 Responses Sep 23, 2007

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    Why

    My husband and I have been married for a year. I think we have had sex twelve times. I broke my leg three months ago and he hasn't touched me since.
    pbell71 pbell71 41-45, F 4 Responses Oct 30, 2013

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    I love my husband, he is my best friend & my

    soul mate. We have sex once, maybe twice a month. We want to have a baby. He feels that it is weird I haven't got pregnant. I am not surprised since we don't have sex very often.
    ot59701 ot59701 31-35, F 7 Responses Feb 12

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    Sexless Or Loveless..?

    I don't mean to pry into this group, but it was suggested to post original from 'I live in a sexless marriage' group. We Live In a Sexless Marriage...   Aside from real physical, medical and or psychological reasons for not having sex with your spouse, I do believe the...
    lonewolf11 lonewolf11 41-45, M 39 Responses Mar 16, 2008

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    My husband and I dated

    for 7 yrs before we got engaged and married. Up until the 5th year it was great. Something changed after that but it wasn't too noticeable. He got more and more distant. Less interested in me and doesn't come near me. We have been married for two years now and it's even worse...
    DelB87 DelB87 26-30, F 3 Responses Feb 4

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    I Feel Terribly Guilty About Admitting This, But...

    Just putting the words out there makes me sick to my stomach...I am in a sexless marriage. Wow, I feel as if I failed...that somehow it's my destiny to be incredibly lonely and unwanted. I think it all started when i found out I was pregnant with my daughter over 11 years ago. I...
    tinkerbell71 tinkerbell71 41-45, F 20 Responses Jul 8, 2013

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    My husband found out shortly

    after we had our first child that he has type one diabetes. He had obviously been living with it, unknown to us, for a long time. The uncontrolled period damaged his blood vessels and now we can no longer have sex. It's been 5 and 1/2 years since we had sex. We are both in our...
    AllAlone55 AllAlone55 31-35, F 5 Responses Jan 14

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    I'm slowly drifting away.

    That once loyal wife I prided myself in being, is coming to a hault. Does he see it in my eyes? Can he sense it? I'm not sure & a big part of me doesn't care. Has he turned me into a hater of intimacy? So many things running through my head on this Sunday night
    gracehopepeace gracehopepeace 31-35, F 10 Responses Feb 2

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    After months of looking

    for a job, I’ve recently settled for a minimum wage thing in a popular “Family Restaurant” that specializes in pizza and Italian food. I won’t name names, but what I saw after a few days on the job surprised me to say the least. There are quite a few folks who have...
    JennyFilth JennyFilth 22-25, F Apr 11

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    I live in a sexless marriage.

    My husband and I have been together for going on four years. At first we did it a lot and then every year it is less an less. I have sat him down and talked it over with him. Tried outfits, asked him about his fantasies, offered to watch **** with him, you name it... Nothing...
    sawilliams sawilliams 22-25, F 6 Responses Mar 6

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    I Live In A Sexless Marriage Already... But I'm Getting Married In July...

    I hope that in writing this, I'm not sending all of my heart into the open, only to get nothing in return... I have raked the internet for any and all hope and help for our relationship, and somehow I was led to this site. I hope this was not a coincidence. A bit about me...
    WillowD WillowD 22-25, F 72 Responses Mar 26, 2011

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    This Fool Is Clueless

    I just got rejected again. And he's acting like he don't know why I'm mad. **** this I'm having an affair.
    lisa49 lisa49 46-50, F 2 Responses Oct 6, 2013

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    Letter To My Husband

    The following is the letter that I plan to give my H on Monday. He has a therapy appointment on Monday. I am hoping his therapist can help him deal with it all. Dear H, I have decided to write to you so that I can get my feelings/thoughts across in a clear manner.     I...
    ANewLife4Me ANewLife4Me 46-50, F 21 Responses Feb 4, 2012

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    If You Think It's Worth Save'n

    To all of you out there in this situation.My husband is in fact my best friend.He knows me better than anyone on earth.We have a wonderful family!But sexualy our relationship has never been a romantic sexual one.And like alot of couples,we thought there must be something wrong...
    DivaReba DivaReba 31-35, F 17 Responses Oct 10, 2012

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    My husband and I haven't had sex in months.

    I'm 31 years old and wants romance in my life! Part of the reason we aren't having sex is because sometimes there's a 1 year old in the bed. I could put him in his bed but he then he screams for hours. That's not why we haven't had sex but part of it. We got the baby to sleep...
    Sumkissed82 Sumkissed82 31-35, F 6 Responses Mar 7

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    Please Explain This to Me

    I don't understand.  I read your stories and you love your husbands, describe their good qualities and say, aside, from no sex, all is great.  I don't understand.  The no sex, no intimacy has eroded away at my feelings for my husband.  If he doesn't want to...
    emily50 emily50 46-50, F 11 Responses Feb 25, 2008

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    Finally, I Moved Out...

    Folks,It’s really rather ironical but it was a marriage counselor with 37 years of expertise, who advised me to walk out of my marriage.My husband obviously is very upset with her but I finally see that my marriage is not going to last no matter what I do.I have moved out and...
    horny39 horny39 41-45, F 33 Responses Mar 16, 2011

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    This isn't how I planned my life.

    I imagined a very active affectionate marriage. He was a sex addict when I met him. He had boxes and boxes of ****. This was okay until he was doing it and not me. Getting rid of it took at least a year. I would throw one or two away for awhile and pretty soon I was...
    Mossmaster Mossmaster 51-55, F 4 Responses Feb 24

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    Solonely80 Solonely80 31-35, F 2 Responses Mar 21

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    Sweet Day Dreams

    I know I've been posting that I am trying to be positive and optimistic about fixing my SM. But this is a place where I'm going to say the things I can't tell anyone else. I feel like my day dreams are a slippery slope. Sure like most people I fantasize about celebs and the...
    GemmaBlue GemmaBlue 31-35, F 1 Response Nov 8, 2013

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    It really is amazing how hard you can focus

    and how much effort you can put forth, when working on something that's important to you, that you truly care about. It also makes it really clear how little you care about our nonexistent sex/love life, if you made even half the effort that you have been making for this test...
    princessmaryjane4200 princessmaryjane4200 31-35, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    For a long time I wondered

    as to WHY he doesn't want me anymore. If I changed something, anything would that change things? I came to the conclusion that: a) I don't care anymore about the why because b) he cannot possibly love me; love does not hurt, love is soothing, exciting, safe, caring and...
    Bobbie71 Bobbie71 41-45, F 3 Responses Mar 24

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    This Is What A Sexless Marriage Feels Like

    I found this on the internet. I wish I was wise enough to write this. I am not, Please read the following. It is one of the best stories I ever read. If you read it post a comment. Thank you This is What a Sexless Marriage Feels Like This post is not about virtue. It is not an...
    OutOfPatience OutOfPatience 61-65, M 55 Responses Oct 20, 2011

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    Mixed Intent

    I was reading some of the stories on here and it struck me how much of my identity is tied into my sexless marriage. For many years (now in 7th year) in my sexless marriage, I was hurt and trying anything i could to get him to have sex with me. Now for the last three years, I...
    annhath annhath 46-50, F 11 Responses Nov 16, 2013

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    Love the Man, Miss the Intimacy.

    We have been married 4 years, together 6. In 4 years, we have had sex 1 time.  I pledged through good times and bad - but this is driving me crazy. He is wonderful, and I can say honestly i have NEVER gotten along as well with anyone else in my life - ever.  I trust...
    Sommerville Sommerville 36-40, F 32 Responses Sep 12, 2007

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    I'm on my way out. We filed the papers to end

    our marriage yesterday, so in thirty to ninety days I will be single. It's a little sad. He and I both have said we never in a million years would have guessed we'd get divorced. I hope I never find myself in a sexless marriage again, but as horrible as being sex deprived was...
    couldbeheaven couldbeheaven 26-30, F 5 Responses Apr 1

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    I live with my husband

    for 7 months, and since then we had sex couple times , something like once a month, in december we got married and after that, we never had sex again. at first I used to get excited and share that with him, try to get him in the "mood", but he just ignores... now I got used to...
    berkanabass berkanabass 18-21, F 12 Responses Jan 22

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    Related Experiences

    Two weeks ago, I shared what I thought would be my current status for awhile. Life being what it is - it has thrown me into a crazy roller coaster loop once again. The good news...
    lightblueeyes lightblueeyes 46-50, F 21 Responses Mar 28

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    Psychology Today has a couple of recent articles regarding "Does Sexless marriage justify adultery". The articles are reasonable and informed and the comments worthwhile. They...
    hl42 hl42 51-55, M 8 Responses 1 day ago

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    Make that, that I used to live in a marriage that was becoming a sexless marriage. Today would have been our second anniversary. The story is complicated, but to make it short, she...
    soundtrackforantarctica soundtrackforantarctica 26-30, M 8 Responses Mar 25

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    Rules of Engagement - A few new members have posted in this forum recently, and while I've only been a member for few weeks, I thought I'd share my opinion on the purpose of this...
    CherishMe2 CherishMe2 51-55, F 15 Responses Mar 20

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    Update from Opposite Land Even though I normally have sex 3-4 times a week with my beloved post sexless marriage lover, I haven't had sex for a week. Why? He is sick with...
    Mettamomma Mettamomma 61-65, F 13 Responses Apr 10

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    I asked for a divorce 2 months ago. He moved out 2 weeks ago. Divorce will be final in 6 months. I wrote all my stories in I live in a sexless marriage group. I have been a member...
    Cucly80 Cucly80 31-35, F 5 Responses Apr 2

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