A NOTE TO THOSE WHO READ MY LIMERICKS
Having buried this category with over a thousand entries in the last little while, I've made it difficult for other limerick writers to get...
why are you always so frantic,
when you know my love's gigantic?
okay, very large,
like your sister Marge.
that`s why I`m called Mr. Romantic.
MY WRITING CRAZINESS
when I'm writing, I like to write fast;
I suppose I'm afraid inspiration won't last.
I hang onto the pen,
and what comes out then,
you get to read, and I get...
this pen has started writing so dark,
I'm gonna hafta put it in "Park,"
and grab a fine pen
that I like to use when
both sides of the page are receiving my mark.
DRUGS AND THE ARTS
you can tell when I've just smoked a doob;
my writing reads like that of a rube.
my brain falls apart;
I can just make a start.
I'd be better off watching the...
I should sit down and do some typing;
instead I sit over here with my notebook, triping.
David Bowie fills the room,
adds the texture of a tomb.
I hope that doesn't...
I gotta give limericks a break,
if anything, for my sanity's sake.
my mind is bound up in five lines,
anything, as long as it rhymes.
I didn't think I was that...
I gotta say my flow is a little slow tonight;
there is nothing I can do to make it right.
just keep on writing,
and hope it starts to get exciting.
I'd like to see that happen...
Otto Bayo is my name;
auto bio is my game.
automatic writing here
will tell the story, have no fear.
names mean nothing all the same.
mostly I'm writing to say
whatever is on my mind today.
it comes in the craziest range
that I'm in no hurry to change.
at my time of life, that's okay!!
I could sit here writing all night;
I got enough sleep, so it feels about right.
I find, if I'm tired
I'm seldom inspired,
as I am when my brain's feeling bright.
I've dropped into silliness here,
my sanity just a veneer
mixed with psychosis,
so let me just give one last sneer.
whaddya mean, it doesn't make...
MY FATHER'S FRIEND
my dad had a friend named Paul,
who was addicted to alcohol;
it ruined his life,
cost him his wife,
and he hung himself in a horse stall.
who knows who saw it...
OLD GUY RHYMING
you'll find my rhythm varies;
sometimes it reads like dictionaries.
a cacophony's not a bad thing;
it's how, out in nature, all the birds sing,
and yet, such a...
THE SIXTIES BEFORE HIPPIES
we were trying to build hotrods without any money.
we'd cruise around the pizza joint sitting next to our honey,
the summers just rolled, how I wish I...
TRY TO SAY GOODBYE
I didn't want to be so curt
but you treated me like dirt,
turned my head ten times around,
tore my heart out, stomped it down.
now you see me and you wanna...
LOST IN THE WOODS
if you keep reading, I think you'll find
you're lost in the forest of a twisted mind.
it's not clean-cut like your average park;
the trees are gnarly, the...
sometimes I feel like a sap,
my stories all over the map.
I'd like to pin down
the truth of this clown,
but I know that it's some kind of trap.
TANGENTIAL TO ALL THAT
I'm better straight than with a stone;
better still when I'm alone.
sometimes when I smoke
life is too much of a joke.
then I find it hard to settle on a...
HOW WE WORK?
does anyone know how people work;
the one likes drip, the next likes perk?
ever ask yourself the 'whys'
of how these differences arise?
for we all come with a little...
-Who art thou, Gatsby?
Who art thou, Gatsby?
Where, how, and why?
I would like to learn your secrets
Before the day I die.
We know you by name,
But it's all we have!
Why keep us...
KEEPING MY MIND LOOSE
every day you can learn something new.
you can, but few of us do;
or it's left in your mind,
never clearly defined.
then it passes one day, like the flu...
lots of people like to write verse;
some's good, and some is much worse.
mine's in the middle,
'cause I like to fiddle
with vernacular, like you might curse.
these regular limericks have their own beat,
which I choose to ignore in the name of the street.
it may sound like something is broken,
but I like the language as spoken,
a point I...
there was a young woman from Spain
who liked to make love in the rain.
when she got wet
she came like a jet,
and made noises like a jet plane.
dentists can make a man cry,
or go home incredibly high;
their stock of pain meds
could knock a man dead,
but the occasion might just slip on by.
doctors, on the...
what I like and you like will differ.
maybe you have standards much stiffer.
whatever the case,
we won't have the same face.
I'm not a musician; I'm a riffer.
Gian Gomeshi got caught;
I wish I could say he was not,
but too many women
pointed at him and
laid out the very same plot.
there's a very fine line to these games.