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I Am Afraid I Have Intimacy Issues

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 266 People

    I am so afraid for people to get close to me,

    physically, emotionally, sexually, because I expect them to hurt me, it means that I keep a barrier around me, and that keeps people away...And yet I long to be 'normal' and be able to have that closeness so that I don't have to be afraid to be alone
    Wi5huponastar Wi5huponastar 26-30, F Mar 6, 2014

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    I find it difficult to be close to anybody.

    . To make or keep friends, "loving" my family, sometimes I even feel my intimacy issues with my dog, who I am trying to form emotions for. I am an emotionless person unless it is tears from watching a movie or something.. I have never loved a man or boy and I am just as bad as...
    LilVixen17 LilVixen17 16-17, F 5 Responses 5 days ago

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    I Know I Do

    I can't get close to anyone. I can't let them touch me, and it makes me uncomfortable if they stare too long. I don't like to be flirted with, I don't know how to respond. I dislike being touched, even when it's someone I know. I don't like to be looked at, and the very idea of...
    SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit 31-35, F 1 Response Mar 20, 2013

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    Brainfreeze

    Sometimes people say they get brainfreeze eating icecream. I never get it in the head though, but in the back between my shoulderblades. It is kinda painfull, but it is not like I wanna touch the place while it hurt... It's like that when I see someone, another person. All the...
    Barlong Barlong 26-30, F Jan 8, 2012

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    I fear and crave intimacy simultaneously.

    So many times break my own heart by letting fear win out. I may lose someone very special to me if I continue with this problem for one moment longer. All my life, I have this pattern of getting involved in lukewarm relationships where I don't have many feelings for the other...
    NamelessNomad NamelessNomad 22-25, F Jan 4, 2015

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    It feels like I have this wall around me.

    Anyone even tries and they get deflected. It's especially bad when its s3xual (seriously EP quit with the stupid censoring). Anyway, when I am with a guy I don't feel anything. My mind is off somewhere else. Thing is, the body can be aroused independent of the mind, so being...
    Lov3intheasylum Lov3intheasylum 31-35, F Jan 31, 2015

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    Difficulty W/intimacy, Isolation & expression

    I have come to learn about myself in the past few weeks that I have a real problem with intimacy and expressing the intimate feeling I have inside.  I instead tend to run and hide, and unfortunately isolate myself for the person I should be expressing these feelings to. ...
    needadvice001 needadvice001 26-30 5 Responses Jul 4, 2008

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    Issues With Other Peoples Intimacy Rules...

    Reasons why I have not been the one (and dumped): People don't share their hearts. They close off. Some treat me like a villain. They only love the idea of being in love. I am not their parent. I know trust is hard to give, but I am not planning on dying tomorrow. We have...
    TheWomanWhoDid TheWomanWhoDid 36-40 Jan 30, 2013

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    Lost Now

     i am pretty sure I have intimacy issues, i want to avoid sex at all costs, and it scares me to death that i will be pressured for sex, and if i do have sex i will be direspected and disgarded afterwarsd,its happened before, and i also have experienced a sexual assult and...
    sweetstacey sweetstacey 26-30, F 3 Responses Aug 6, 2008

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    I Can't Kiss My Husband

    I am so frustrated, sad, confused, etc....  I'm having huge issues with intimacy and can't nail down why.  I recently discovered that I am okay with having sex with my husband but not with foreplay.  I don't want to do all of the kissing and heavy petting. ...
    BCoonce BCoonce 31-35, F 6 Responses Apr 15, 2010

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    Please Help Me!!!!

    I am engaged to a woman whom I love very much.  She has issues of her own, but has come a long way and has worked very hard to survive and overcome.  The problem is that she says that I don't make her feel like a woman.  She tells me that she loves me with all...
    IndyNudist IndyNudist 46-50, M 16 Responses Feb 12, 2010

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    I Am Afraid I Have Intimacy Issues Looking For A Female For A Loving Anr In An Adult Nursing Relationship In Tampa Bay, Fl.

    I am a Single White Male Searching For Open Minded Female In Tampa Bay, Fl . i am a single white male age 58 searching for an open minded female in tampa bay, florida. if you are out there give me a buzz so that we can chat?
    deleted deleted 26-30 Nov 22, 2013

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    My exboyfriend had intimacy issues.

    We dated three times for several months each. I loved him deeply but just couldn't wait any longer for the sex. I didn't actually say it but I'm sure he could sense it. He picked a ridiculous fight to break us up and I can't believe he just threw me away like that because I...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response Sep 27, 2015

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    Araid Of Being Loved

    i have never been in a proper relationship that has lasted over a month... whenever things start to look good or are going well, i find a reason to end the relationship, and the guys i choose are never really people i feel strongly for anyway so i feel no remorse when i end it. I...
    JibaJaba JibaJaba 18-21, F Jul 3, 2011

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    Always Afraid...

    Whenever my boyfriend and I kiss...and I mean KISS, not some little lip action, but full-out tongue-twisting, groping, sprawled on the bed kiss...I get this panicky feeling deep inside my chest, constricting my breath, making me want to push him away and curl up into a ball...
    LiquidFire89 LiquidFire89 18-21, F 4 Responses Sep 7, 2007

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    Very, very afraid. Rejection

    and abuse have probably played a big part. From both family and everyone else. An unwanted sexual encounter at 14 with an older woman also kind of made me fearful I guess. I guess it's really very difficult to peg down exactly. But for a long time I've always been very selective...
    zeframcochrane zeframcochrane 18-21 Aug 16, 2015

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    Hard to Use the "L" Word

    It's hard for me to tell others I LOVE them! Even friends and family. And especially my hubby. Why is this? I DON'T KNOW?? My parents were certainly not adverse to saying and showing Love to us kids growing up! My grandparents never let us leave their homes without a hug, kiss...
    emerald emerald 36-40, F 16 Responses Apr 23, 2008

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    I don't find that I miss people

    as much as I should
    magnamino magnamino 36-40, M 2 Responses Feb 15, 2015

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    I dont like cuddling,

    kissing, hugging in public.. It feels embarassing to me
    feebiechichi feebiechichi 31-35, F Feb 26, 2014

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    KaidaKat KaidaKat 18-21, F Nov 1, 2015

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    I'm So Lonely And Yearn For Connection, But Am So Afraid

    I'm 22 years old. I'm attractive, smart (when it comes to school), and friendly. All my life I have dealt with failure, rejection, bullying, and disappointment. I think because of that, i am very insecure with myself. I have never had a boyfriend before, although I've dated a...
    Gymgirl89 Gymgirl89 22-25 9 Responses Dec 29, 2011

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    Related Experiences

    I really dont trust and it ruins my relationships with people. . . its toxic to my life and i wish i could change it. . . . but people keep abusing my trust. . this has happened...
    212panda 212panda 36-40, F 1 Response 6 hrs ago

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    I don't know what to say about this. All I know is that I swear far too much and get into too many arguments. I have done things in the past that I'm not proud of. I've shouted at...
    skeletoncliquetop skeletoncliquetop 13-15, F 1 Response 9 hrs ago

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    this boy named nick, he's like super into me and I told him I can't be near him only because I'm scared... I'm scared to get close to someone like him...I've been threw some...
    SinfulSkin SinfulSkin 16-17, F 1 Response 23 hrs ago

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    A few days ago, I felt some twitching in my face. I've dealt with twitching for a while now, so I wasn't too surprised by it. But this time it lasted for about an hour. My twitches...
    hiddenkitty hiddenkitty 18-21, F 1 day ago

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    Neglected, lonely child. Married a women with borderline personality disorder. Divorced her. Lots more betrayals as an adult. Some personal tragedies all linked to attachment...
    Onewithone Onewithone 46-50, M 1 Response 4 days ago

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    And if you can't accept that then please warn me before commencing communication... I have willingly given the fruits of my soul too often, in the hope for what? An imaginary...
    Listening80 Listening80 31-35, F 3 Responses 4 days ago

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    I don't have trust issues. People have lying issues. I'm so over having to label myself this way as if I've never trusted anyone before. Every time I put my trust in someone they...
    BeverlyPills BeverlyPills 18-21, F 6 Responses 5 days ago

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    I have never been in a relationship because of the simple fact that I don't trust anyone, with anything. In fact, I am still a virgin because I don't trust anyone enough to put a...
    anonyme23 anonyme23 22-25, M 1 Response 6 days ago

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    My mom always likes to borrow my Facebook to look up people she knows but I don't like it and she always says she does not like Facebook but I want her to get one so she doesn't...
    megos21 megos21 22-25, F 4 Responses a week ago

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    Me and my dad use to be really close, but he has changed the older he has gotten. He's having affairs, gambling all the time and is very antisocial. When my mom finally decided to...
    kewlchicc kewlchicc 36-40, F Jan 28

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    I have been abused before. It wasn't nice, he moved away before the police could get him. My mother knew.
    Ducostrinity Ducostrinity 18-21, F 5 Responses Jan 28

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    I have always had trust issues, I always assume others are going to screw me over and honestly when I ask myself why I feel that way I become instantly tired, I realized it's my...
    John2526 John2526 36-40, M 1 Response Jan 27

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    There was this moment, with my mentor. His eyes are blue but they looked jet black. It was late, nighttime. We were at a client' meeting trying to explain the mess they were in...
    pearlesque pearlesque 31-35, F 3 Responses Jan 27

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    This last year has really opened my eyes. I trusted someone, helped them regain their footing. In return, I was put through experiences that left me traumatized and afraid to...
    Bored2016 Bored2016 41-45, F 1 Response Jan 26

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    I have major trust issues with people so i often shut myself off...never really let anyone on bc the times i have, i always ended up hurt.
    BrittBratz BrittBratz 31-35, F 2 Responses Jan 26

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    You walked out on me for no reason - 2 months into a relationship... then 5 months later you start talking to me again. At first just friendly, because I felt sick when I first...
    Catho Catho 18-21, F 1 Response Jan 26

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    All my adult life, I've had people talk me into doing pretty much anything through sweet talking me, often times it was something where I had nothing in it for me, they were...
    TheNarratorGrim TheNarratorGrim 18-21, M 1 Response Jan 26

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    I ended up getting together with Frida, a girl i talked about in my previous experiance. things are going....ok, except for the fact that im extremely jeallous and possesive...
    AncientSpirit AncientSpirit 18-21, M Jan 25

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    My mom had me when she was 18. No daddy here. I know his name and often wish I knew what he was about. I'm envious of those who have a great love and connection with their father...
    deleted deleted 26-30 Jan 25

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    I've come to find that I have retroactive jealousy. I get very upset about someone's sexual past and begin to think that what we have is less special. My insecurities show and I...
    MisterMisterInc MisterMisterInc 26-30, M Jan 24

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