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I Am An Adult Child With a Smother Mother

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 51 People

    Gasping For Air

    My Mother has strangled me with love for the past 30 years of my life.  And after seeing numerous therapists, I've discovered it is easier to let the suffocating continue than to break away, because to break away would be to devastate her.  I love and hate my Mother...
    abigailrymsha abigailrymsha 26-30 2 Responses Jan 4, 2009

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    Old Before My Time

    I don't know if smother mother is what i would call my mum - but as I see myself as my mother's emotional crutch I guess you could say she wears me down. My mum is 68, married 3 times, divorced twice then widowed. I am the oldest of 6 children. I am 48. My mum's childhood was...
    ratchetjaw55 ratchetjaw55 46-50 2 Responses Feb 7, 2011

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    I Am An Evil, Ungrateful Child

    My mum was controlling my life for 23 years by grounding me, guilt trips, emotional blackmail, sighs, looks, etc. She hated all my friends (she has bad influence on you). I was not allowed to choose what clothes to buy (you look like a *****/goth/punk). I was not allowed out...
    CassieG CassieG 26-30 11 Responses Feb 28, 2010

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    My mother has spent the last thirty four years

    controlling my life to the point where I literally cannot even go outside without her permission. She will tell you I'm just being sensitive, manipulative, dramatic or crazy but then that states the problem right there. I'm a human being with rights but not where my mother is...
    Rameyalaine Rameyalaine 36-40, F 2 Responses Feb 3, 2014

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    My Smothered Life

    I've always wondered why I cringe every time I'm around my mother for just a couple hours. I've always felt like an evil person for that... able to give anyone else a hug with no problem but to feel sick to my stomach to give my own mother a hug. Well, its been almost one year...
    pica83 pica83 26-30 2 Responses Dec 28, 2011

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    I've realized that it's difficult

    for both the child and the mother to realize their are inefficiencies in the relationship that cause a dependent child on a controlling mother. It wasn't difficult for me because I'm well balanced and have all my issues in check. But I can understand where someone who has been...
    Rameyalaine Rameyalaine 36-40, F Feb 3, 2014

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    Adulthood Damage From Having a Smother Mother

           I stand here at age 30, healthy, sane and without shady life activities. I can cook healthy meals, get dressed, go to school, etc. Other parents wouldn't see me as being frail, unhealthy, at risk or worthy of being wrapped in wool. Feelings of...
    smartiecats smartiecats 26-30 70 Responses Jun 14, 2008

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    Related Experiences

    I just had the biggest row with my mother and I told her I feel like I have to be the adult in my relationship with her and that she behaves like a child. She says she thinks I'm...
    Kittyk22 Kittyk22 22-25, F 2 Responses May 21

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    *RANT* As I am getting older, it seems my mother is losing herself mentally...she seems to be on autopilot most days, as if in a constant fog. People ask her questions and she...
    tcteacher tcteacher 26-30, F 1 Response May 3

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    Well my wife is stressed with dealing with her mother, she keeps telling her about doctor's appointments that need to be made and just be the typical mom, but with the added stress...
    Fotoman Fotoman 46-50, M 1 Response May 14

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    Well, we arent married..yet...but we are in a committed, monogamous relationship. live together and planning on marriage down the road. His mom was super sweet to me at first when...
    bethkins24 bethkins24 46-50, F 3 Responses May 7

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    I've come to realize that I don't have any responsibilities concerning her, and that I really shouldn't worry myself about her. I do admit its hard for me to ignore her as my fianc...
    Msprissy Msprissy 36-40, F 4 days ago

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    I recently decided to cut my mom and my sister out of my life. I don't know if it is a good idea to keep trying. My mom has it in her head that I was talking bad about her on...
    BitchieHouseWife BitchieHouseWife 26-30, F 1 Response May 12

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    I think my mother is psychotic...I'm not sure how to deal with her anymore. I'm 17 and I have been dreaming of the day when I turn 18 for so long now. As long as I can remember, my...
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 3

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    My son was born in August 2000, with Hemihypertrophy,he is now 14 1/2, he was taken from me in a child custody fight,along with his sister. My ex-husband was and is a monster, liar...
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 6

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    I don't understand how she became who she is. She has no compassion for her children and basically has fallen under the influence of my dad. Why can't she be herself, be...
    GodsArte GodsArte 18-21, F 1 Response May 6

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    "Addicted to an ACoA" I was wondering if someone could closely describe his own experiences living with an ACoA, in terms of 'relationship addiction'. To me it is like being...
    cureav cureav 31-35, M 1 Response May 4

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    I came across this post, funny right at the time I have to make this decision. My choice is to move to a town 5 hours from my city life, leave a good job to move into a house with...
    Jackson0422 Jackson0422 36-40, F 4 Responses May 6

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    This sounds so wrong but sometimes I wish I had a different mother. Majority of my girlfriends mothers are very close with them. As in "dating" their daughters. Having that mother...
    DarkGoddesss DarkGoddesss 18-21, F 2 Responses May 18

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    I feel empty and cold wen i hug my mother but i will never forget what she did to me in the past , it hurted me and affect me so much , i do love her and everything but the thing...
    paulam76 paulam76 18-21, F May 7

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    When was the last time you felt like the deepest part of your soul was in a tug-of-war? When was the last time you felt excited, yet sad? Angry, yet compassionate? Relaxed, but...
    IRealizedVienna IRealizedVienna 18-21, F 1 Response Apr 30

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    So Last night the cops came to my house because of my mom.....My older sister told my mom about my dads mother because she said something about my mom and it has nothing to do with...
    MidnightRose3807 MidnightRose3807 13-15, F 1 Response May 19

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    My mother spat in my face other time and told me she should have bought a dog instead of having me
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response May 22

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    my mother can not stand me half the time like just this morning she was saying she wishes she had a car so we can go and get some breakfast and I told her she did not need to drive...
    jackiehammack2019 jackiehammack2019 31-35, F 20 hrs ago

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    I gave my 10yr old step daughter some advice a month or so back and have only noticed now how much of it she took onboard. Things are so much better and her anxiety and guilt have...
    stormmistress stormmistress 31-35, F May 3

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    I am going to college for special needs teaching. I have been working with special needs children since I was in fourth grade.
    deleted deleted 26-30 May 6

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    So many people get caught up in religion that there is not room for God, let alone other people...they forget the church is not a home for perfect people but a hospital for the...
    teadiva teadiva 31-35, F 4 Responses May 7

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    Some days are so much harder than others. . . schooling is a disapointing system for my child that is stuck in a dark age where theres no room for opening your mind.
    212panda 212panda 31-35, F 2 Responses May 12

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    Today my child disclosed a teacher has been hitting him on the hand with a pen when he is not focused or working fast enough
    212panda 212panda 31-35, F 1 Response May 21

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    I love my mom to death that's my mom I don't disrespect her in anyway but sometimes she doesn't even feel like my mom I relate more to my friends mom than my own I can barely even...
    bb1017 bb1017 18-21, F 1 Response May 19

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    My mum never supports me with what I want to do in life. When I was little I wanted to be a chef but up until a couple of years ago I didn't want to do that anymore. I want to be a...
    itscassi itscassi 13-15, F May 20

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    all we do is argue, every single day. sometimes I try and blame her but deep down I know it's all my fault, and I just feel like a horrible daughter. like is there something wrong...
    toostressedtobeblessed toostressedtobeblessed 13-15, F 3 days ago

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    I hate being the oldest sibling sometimes. I always have to sit in the house and watch my little brother cause he can't be home alone and he gets away with everything. Ugh.
    emznicole emznicole 16-17, F 1 Response May 9

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    My daughter is bipolar - most of the time she is ok with medication. But when she has a bad day I find it really difficult to cope with
    freefish21 freefish21 46-50, F 1 Response a week ago

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    I haven't seen my daughter in almost a year. We found out she was doing drugs and was being abused by her boyfriend. We panicked and tried to get her home and away from the...
    Baileymiamom Baileymiamom 51-55, F May 7

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    Boyfriend and I are pretty serious, almost 5 years together now, lived together most of that time. MIL has been sending him links to condos, asking his likes and dislikes, not sure...
    Labiatae Labiatae 26-30, F 1 Response May 4

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    finished my dinner, then mil did. I was still sitting at the table looking at a few things on my phone she gets up takes her stuff away from the table and doesn't Take mine our...
    Fotoman Fotoman 46-50, M 1 Response 3 days ago

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    I finally ordered Charlotte's Web for my daughter. I'm still kind of nervous about it. I prayed on it also. Being that it stayed on my mind from the moment I heard about it...
    LadyHeyward LadyHeyward 41-45, F 2 Responses Apr 30

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    mothers of all kinds deserve recognition. so happy mother's day to all that guide a child with a mother's heart, whether you gave birth to them or not.
    friendstrong friendstrong 41-45, F May 10

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    "13 Things No Estranged Child Needs To Hear On Mother’s Day" http://www.mommyish.com/2014/05/07/estranged-adult-children-mothers-day/
    zeeva70 zeeva70 41-45, F 4 Responses May 3

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    Hi I go by Fruity punch on here.I would like to share a personal story from my experience with my mother.Let me start back when I was younger for you to understand the emotional...
    Fruitypunch15 Fruitypunch15 31-35 1 Response May 13

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    My mom is very kind even to this dependent adult child of her. Today my mom drove me by car until the university. I can get there with trains and bus as long as someone drove me...
    rainyrainsky rainyrainsky 26-30, F 2 Responses 3 days ago

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