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I Am An Incredible Smartass

Personal Stories, Advice, and Support 115 People

    Yep

    I am an incredible smartass. It doesnt matter what you say, I can more than likely find something with it to snart off about. =)I don't do it to be mean, I do it because...........it makes me giggle....he he he
    Punk1n Punk1n 31-35, F 1 Response Mar 3, 2011

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    This Comes As A Shock???

    I mean, seriously.  Then again, I'd much rather be a smartass than a dumbass!
    Plaid Plaid 31-35, F 3 Responses Mar 31, 2011

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    And???????

    WHO THE **** ASKED YOU TO READ THIS ANYWAY????
    seadragon59 seadragon59 51-55, M Nov 9, 2011

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    Smartass Alert!

    Me = SmartassEnough said.
    ItsLikeThatMan ItsLikeThatMan 31-35, M Sep 9, 2011

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    What can you say? If there were no smartasses, this world would be full of dumbasses. All hail the smartasses!
    Mossonarock Mossonarock 41-45, M 1 Response 16 hrs ago

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    We met online, March 2014....We've both been married for over 20+ years..both have children, and a life, yet she is unhappy in her marriage, and there are things in my marriage...
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    Much of my work day is spent staring out my window amazed at nature and day dreaming. There's a bird nest in the tree so I often wonder "If I could fly who would I **** on first?"
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    As self conscious as a lot of women are they still courageously wear bikinis that expose 90% of their body. And we men, kind and polite as we are, don't want to make women...
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    Well I haven't written it yet but it started building up in a reply to a fellow veterans message on fb. It's about the 1000 yard stare, I'm having problems with it's rhythm or...
    jayciedubb jayciedubb 46-50, M 1 Response 1 day ago

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    Selfies? Selfies? I grew up in a time when that meant something totally different and you didn't share it with anyone. My neck hurts just thinking about it. Ba Duh Bump!!
    BJGiff BJGiff 46-50, M 1 day ago

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    Shake it all you want but that Magic 8 Ball was right about you 99% of the time.
    BJGiff BJGiff 46-50, M 3 Responses 2 days ago

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    Boring, introverted, dumb and silent are not my type. I need a 3 ring circus, intelligent, funny as hell, smartass who can find a party in the boring daily grind!
    SoulSurfing SoulSurfing 46-50, F 14 Responses 2 days ago

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    my sister always asks me what I'm eating... food, what does it look like?
    BillyBillion BillyBillion 13-15, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    I got it from my dad and he got it from George Carlin and other comedians of his time.
    gish1893 gish1893 16-17, F 1 Response 2 days ago

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    To err is human; but to blame it on someone else obviously makes you President of the United States.
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    I asked God for a riding lawn mower but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole my elderly neighbors lawn mower then asked God for forgiveness.
    BJGiff BJGiff 46-50, M 1 Response 2 days ago

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    Relatively speaking ant hills are just as big as pyramids and ants build them everyday. Humans need to get over themselves.
    BJGiff BJGiff 46-50, M 3 Responses 3 days ago

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    I'm a Sagittarius. ..what do u expect?
    CarpeDiemBrady CarpeDiemBrady 31-35, F 1 Response 3 days ago

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    Lost my watch at the club and saw a guy step on it while sexually harassing a girl. I walked up to him and beat the crap out of him. Nobody does that to a girl, not on my watch :/
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    I love being sarcastic and I actually consider it a strength. it has come to my attention that a lot of people don't like it, especially when your 36 and it isn't 'cute' anymore. I...
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    I had the most incredible, fun filled, and truly wonderful day yesterday. I had the chance to hit the NYS fair with my guys on the fair's first ever Pride day. We spent the...
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    Energy saving tip: This winter if you're house is cold, instead of turning on the heat go stand in the corner. It's usually around 90 degrees.
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    I love music. Nothing beats a beautiful woman with a great singing voice? Except Chris Brown of course.
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    *Talking to a friend* Teacher: Tj Me: Yes? Teacher: repeat what I just said Me: repeat what I just said
    CallmeTJ CallmeTJ 13-15, M 3 Responses 6 days ago

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    Thinking before I speak? Lol a long process in the making but I can be such a smartass and most of the time there's no reason smh or because that person just opened the door for it...
    Clipz4her Clipz4her 26-30, F 2 Responses a week ago

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    Yes, I am. Except I'm not a ***, I'm a frog. So, I'm a smart frog. There was no group for that, so I will go with a ***. Yes, I am very smart.
    Iamafrog1997 Iamafrog1997 16-17, M 3 Responses a week ago

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    Who am i? i will tell you. I am a very honest person, i also am a smartass, have a very dirty mind and i think a good sense of humor. I don't pretend to be who i am not. I don't...
    deleted deleted 26-30 1 Response a week ago

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    It was the only teacher I'd ever had a problem with, especially a lit teacher. Back in high school when I was still being shuffled between my adoptive (amish) side and my birth...
    NerdModeActivate NerdModeActivate 31-35, F Aug 26

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    I don't try to be but I'm honest and I speak my mind . My mouth is my biggest problem but honestly if you can't handle what I have to say then you shouldn't be talking to me . I am...
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    And I am an ever bigger Dumb *** sometimes.
    IPleadthe5th IPleadthe5th 41-45 9 Responses Aug 24

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    I want to get a pig and name it Kevin, just so I can call him Kevin Bacon.
    lthrnick1987 lthrnick1987 26-30, M 4 Responses Aug 24

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    If you're going to be a smartass, first you have to be smart. Otherwise you're just an ***.
    FeelingPeachy FeelingPeachy 18-21, F 6 Responses Aug 24

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    I said to my wife, "It smells like Upsexy in here" She said, "What's Upsexy?" I said, "Nothing much" :)
    ricki2012 ricki2012 56-60, T 4 Responses Aug 23

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    I CAN be........ .
    cashetty69 cashetty69 51-55, M Aug 22

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    Where do I begin? Sarcasm is the cornerstone of my existence. If I don't insult you playfully first thing in the morning, you aren't my friend.
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    Uncle Voldy : Knock Knock Harry : Who is there? Uncle Voldy : You Know Harry : You Know Who? Uncle Voldy : EXACTLY!
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